Emotions are not for Assassins
by Overlordfluffy
Summary: Illumi finds himself living with Hisoka and much to his dismay, faces new challenges never addressed by his training as an assassin. (A Hisoillu fic. Hisoka x Illumi) Canon divergence. Come for the jokes stay for the angst. Currently doing an overhaul of the earlier chapters! Chapters 1-5 have been rewritten so check them out because THEY'RE SO GOOD AAAAH
1. Alternative Living Conditions

Illumi replayed his parent's conversation in his head. They had sat down with him last weekend in one of their many sitting rooms. He knew whatever they had to say wasn't good when they told him they needed to talk. But he never would have imagined they'd be kicking him out.

"It's time you found alternative living arrangements." His father's words were foreign to him. "You'll still be carrying out assassinations for the family business, but from now on you will not live with us."

Illumi didn't expect that finding adequate living space difficult. Illumi could have found an apartment on his own, he had enough income. But everything... unsavory. He needed a place to crash while he searched, and Illumi had always lived with his family, and he'd always had butlers. Who would cook his food and do his laundry while he tried to find a place? He certainly didn't want to do it himself.

Illumi didn't have many acquaintances. In fact, he happened to have only one. A certain magician. Illumi first searched for him in Heaven's Arena but found that he wasn't there.

It didn't take too long to track him down. He was living in Yorkshin in a high-rise apartment in the middle of the city.

It wasn't the Zoldyck mansion, but it wasn't disagreeable.

Of course, Hisoka was thrilled to have him. If only Illumi knew that Hisoka, would not in fact, act as his butler.

…...

"I hate this." Illumi mumbled.

Hisoka looked over to Illumi, who was sitting next to him with a basket full of laundry. Illumi still hadn't figured out how to fold a crop top.

"That's life, my friend."

"We're not friends. Assassins do not have friends."

Hisoka sighed. An old fight from Heaven's Arena played on the large flat screen television. Hisoka's eyes reflected dancing lights as they glazed over. "You know, Illumi, when you broke into my house and demanded that you stay here, I was expecting a little more fun."

Illumi ignored Hisoka's comment and focused on the piece of fabric in front of him. Although he found Hisoka to not be as obedient and pliant as a butler, he was rather agreeable. Hisoka had gladly let Illumi sleep on his couch for the time being, but Illumi found that Hisoka's closet was much more comfortable, as it was small and cramped and dark, much to his liking. All he had to do was continue to avoid his advancements.

"You have to stop sleeping in my closet." Hisoka slouched on the cushions of his couch and spoke without looking at Illumi.

"No," Illumi said while pulling out a pair of brightly colored pants from the laundry basket. They were Hisoka's, and they were hideous.

"It's not up for discussion."

"I like it there."

"Last night you slept on my favorite high heel boots and now the back of the ankle opening is bent."

"You can move your shoes."

Hisoka looked away from the TV towards Illumi and smirked. Illumi could feel his stupid sly smile without looking at him.

"You could fight me over it. If you win, I'll move my shoes. If _I_ win, you sleep with me."

"Forget it. I'll just sleep on the couch." Illumi interrupted Hisoka before he could finish. He looked down at the ugly clown pants he had been trying to fold and saw that his folding abilities were still awful.

"Where are your butlers?"

"We have been over this, I don't employ butlers," Hisoka said.

Illumi turned his head to look directly at Hisoka, who had returned to watching a fight on TV.

"You need butlers." Illumi threw the ball of cornea-injuring pants onto the floor.

"Why won't you fight me?" Hisoka whined without looking away from the screen.

Illumi blinked in surprise that Hisoka had not dropped the conversation even after he specifically commanded that he forget the topic.

"I said I would sleep on the couch."

"Only after I asked you to fight me. Why don't you want to fight me?"

Illumi looked in disbelief at Hisoka. He had never really expressed desire to fight with Illumi. Everything up until this point had been some sort of attempt to flirt with him.

"Why are you asking me this now?"

"Why won't you answer me?" Hisoka grinned again. His smile seemed malicious, and probably would have made anybody else shiver, but Illumi was an assassin, not a regular person. Hisoka's grin never made him an inch uncomfortable. It did, however, make him curious.

"Because I do not want to." Illumi studied Hisoka's face for a moment.

"You don't want to fight me?" Hisoka's grin began to fade and he looked right into Illumi's black eyes before speaking again. "Illumi, darling, is it because you're nervous that you'll lose?"

"You cannot goad me into fighting you." Illumi looked back at the magician, eyes unblinking and stare unfocused. Hisoka kept his eyes locked on Illumi for a moment, daring him to blink. Illumi didn't blink. Hisoka turned back to look at the match on his screen.

"It was worth a try." Hisoka sighed and returned to his slouching position. Illumi turned back to the laundry. All the piles of clothes he had "done" looked no different from the piles of clothes fresh from the dryer.

"You need butlers." Illumi gave up on trying to fold the laundry. He crossed his legs and relaxed on the couch. It was a beautiful white couch that Illumi found rather comfortable, and rather stylish. Hisoka's whole apartment was surprisingly well put together.

Illumi breathed as he decided to try to enjoy the match Hisoka was watching. It looked like it was from Heaven's arena. It was a lively match between a young man and a woman, and although he didn't really seem like it, Illumi could tell that Hisoka was way into the fight. Hisoka's leg bounced up and down. Watching this match probably put him in the mood for some violence. Illumi concluded that Hisoka's penchant for some bloodshed was the reason he has asked Illumi to fight with him.

"Illumi, sweetheart, you're staring at me." Illumi looked up from Hisoka's knee to see Hisoka's face staring back at him.

"I was only observing your behavior." Illumi responded calmly.

"Oh? And what exactly have you observed?" Hisoka sat up a bit and turned more completely to face Illumi.

"When you watch fights, you get in the mood to fight."

"And how did you conclude that?" Hisoka's grin had returned.

"You asked me if I wanted to fight you. You've never wanted to fight me before. Also, you begin to call me things like "sweetheart." In general, you get antsy and irritated." Illumi blinked a couple of times when he was done speaking, proud of his observations. Hisoka chuckled.

"You really are cute, you know that?"

Illumi's mouth twitched and his brows wrinkled for just a moment at the comment. "Do not belittle me."

"What are you going to do about it? Fight me?" Hisoka laughed.

"No, you would probably get off to that." Illumi nearly cringed at the thought of Hisoka getting off to fighting him.

Hisoka, surprised, sat up straight and turned his face to Illumi.

"And what exactly would you know about 'getting off?' Hm?" Hisoka's full attention was focused on Illumi now. His eyes searched Illumi's for any sign of nervousness before he spoke again. "Let me ask you this, how exactly do _you_ get off, Illumi?"

Illumi knew at this point that Hisoka was trying to throw him off and make him uncomfortable. Illumi would not be flustered by this petty attempt.

"Well I personally don't 'get off' to anything, but I know that you do."

"And what do you think I get off to?"

Illumi tilted his head. "You're probably a masochist. You always go looking for trouble and for people who are stronger than you for fun. You let a little boy live so that he could get the chance to grow into someone that could annihilate you. You find some sort of sexual pleasure in thinking about how strong your opponent is. If I had to guess what it is exactly that you get off to, it would probably be pain."

Hisoka's eyes widened after listening to Illumi. Illumi tilted his head back to its original position and looked straight at Hisoka's bewildered face. Hisoka burst into laughter, much to Illumi's surprise.

"You really are observant, aren't you?"

"I am an assassin. Observance is part of what I do."

"What other skills do you possess?" Hisoka's voice dripped with the sound of genuine curiosity. His eyebrow raised and his lips stretched as he smiled. Illumi never understood smiling. In the wild, animals bear their teeth to show aggression. Normal people smiled to show that they were happy, but Illumi always got the feeling that when Hisoka smiled, just as a hungry wolf would, he showed his teeth as a means to threaten.

"You already know what I'm capable of." Illumi maintained his unblinking stare. He knew that any movement he made would be seen as weakness. Hisoka stared back at him waiting to see any disruption in his calm demeanor. As Hisoka expected, Illumi stayed perfectly still. Hisoka let out a small chuckle before turning away from Illumi's unending gaze.

"I must say, my friend, you are observant, but you're not entirely correct about what it is I get off to." Illumi felt his face wrinkle at the spot between his eyebrows. He was almost never wrong. Also, Hisoka called him a 'friend,' and not in any way that hinted at sarcasm. This was unacceptable. Assassins didn't have friends.

Hisoka noticed Illumi's confusion through the corner of his eye and smirked. "You're right about one thing, I enjoy pain, but when it comes to sex, I always want to get under my partner's skin…" Hisoka was facing Illumi again, but Illumi stared straight towards the TV screen. "I love inflicting pain. Coloring my partner with bruises and scratches... and other marks." Illumi could sense Hisoka getting closer to him. "What I love the most is pushing them so far into a world of pleasure that anything and everything – even pain – pushes them further into ecstasy." Hisoka was inches away from Illumi's face, whispering in a low voice into Illumi's ear. Illumi had endured years of torture and training to become an assassin, and both women and men had all desperately thrown themselves at Illumi in the past. Usually they would try to seduce him to stop him from killing someone, or to try to get out of paying him for an assassination, but not one of them had ever once made him the least bit interested. They were all offers made out of desperation. Offers made to Illumi to use their bodies to his liking. But Illumi always found it beneath him to use someone's body for sex. He just, never got the appeal.

But this situation made Illumi uncomfortable in a way he never knew was possible. Hisoka wasn't offering himself. Hisoka was _threatening_ Illumi with the possibility of pleasure. And he didn't have to say anything.

"You are too close to me." Illumi finally spoke up.

"Does this make you uncomfortable?" Illumi felt his heart begin to beat faster despite his will to keep calm. It was too obvious that he was, in fact, uncomfortable.

"Yes."

Hisoka's right hand slid around Illumi's shoulder while his left hand moved to rest on Illumi's leg.

"What are you going to do about it?"

"Do not test me, magician." Illumi could feel Hisoka's hand slide further up his thigh. Illumi's legs spread just an inch at the touch, much to Illumi's surprise. No one had ever dared place their hands there, and this reaction his body was having was unsavory.

"You can stop me at any time." Hisoka whispered.

Illumi breathed, finding his concentration. No one ever dared touching him, because no one ever had the right. "Fine, I will."

With one swift motion, Illumi plunged one of his large pins that he kept with him at all times into Hisoka's shoulder and lunged towards him, pinning him against the couch. Illumi stood up above Hisoka and placed his foot on his chest. Hisoka groaned in pain for a moment smiled as he looked up from beneath the very flustered Illumi.

"I'll kill you." Illumi glared down at Hisoka.

"Careful, Illumi, you're turning me on." Hisoka moaned and his face flushed pink. His eyes sparkled over and a strange aura overcame him.

"You dare to assume that I would ever let you of all people have the _privilege_ of touching me? Did you forget who I am? Or worse, do you know who I am but you still forget your place?"

"Is this a bad time?" Hisoka and Illumi heard a voice from the doorway. They turned to see Chrollo, standing by the entrance, holding several grocery bags.

"No, not a bad time at all." Illumi answered calmly.

"Don't answer him as if this is your place!" Hisoka squirmed underneath Illumi's foot trying to get away as he spoke.

"Did you remember to get sardines?" Illumi pressed his foot down on Hisoka but kept his eyes on Chrollo as he walked over to the kitchen located behind the living room. Chrollo had been living with Hisoka for longer that Illumi had, although it was not by choice. He was still under the control of Kurapika's chains and could not communicate with his troupe. Chrollo was a much more agreeable roommate than Hisoka and he got along well with Illumi. He kept to himself mostly to read or do research on how to get his Nen back. It was Illumi's understanding that the reason why Hisoka was not currently living in Heaven's Arena was because of his duty to Chrollo.

"They didn't have any, sorry. I don't know why you like those little canned fish anyway. They stink up the whole apartment." Chrollo walked past the living room and into Hisoka's kitchen, setting the bags down on the white breakfast table.

"I like the way the little bones feel when I bite into my sandwich," Illumi explained.

"Don't mean to interrupt, but my shoulder is starting to bleed onto my carpet and it is VERY hard to get blood out of white shag!" Illumi looked down at Hisoka and studied his face. He was clearly in pain but he didn't seem to be taking any pleasure from it. In fact, he was completely different than before. His face was still red, but he didn't have the same expression on it as before.

"So, I knew you two were into kinky shit, but I always assumed Hisoka would be the top." Chrollo spoke from the kitchen as he put groceries away. Illumi removed his foot from Hisoka.

"Top?" Illumi got off the couch and walked towards the kitchen. Hisoka got up and shuffled quickly to the sink before Illumi could reach the counter.

Chrollo looked at Illumi for a moment, registering his question. "Oh, honey." Chrollo looked at Illumi with what Illumi registered as pity.

"What does that...?" Illumi slowly put together the context of the situation and Chrollo's words. "Oh. We weren't doing anything like that." Illumi was almost offended that Chrollo assumed he would be engaging in activities of the sexual sort with Hisoka.

Chrollo shrugged. "I can't ever really tell with Hisoka. His sexual escapades usually have something to do with dominance and you looked like you were putting him in his place." Chrollo spoke as he placed the new bread in the breadbox.

"It unnerves me that you know this about him." Illumi reached into the grocery bags as he spoke, deciding he would help Chrollo put away the vegetables.

"Trust me, you don't want to know."

"I would never allow that clown to touch me in such a manner." Illumi pulled a jug of milk out of one of the bags. Meanwhile, Hisoka groaned as he took the pin out from his shoulder. He took his shirt off and rinsed the stab wound, which wasn't too deep, but from what Illumi could tell from Hisoka's breathing, it stung like hell.

"Oh please, Illumi. You know I turn you on." Hisoka grinned despite being in pain.

"There's nothing to turn on," Illumi said before sniffing a peach.

Hisoka wrung out his shirt in the sink. The copper smell of blood reached Illumi's nose for a moment as the water in the sink turned red. Hisoka held his shirt up to see the damage.

"Illumi you owe me a new shirt."

"Good, maybe I can buy you something that isn't hideous."

Chrollo chuckled at Illumi's comment.

"What the fuck are _you_ laughing at with your fuzzy-collared-plunging-neck line jacket made of _leather_?" Hisoka snarled at Chrollo.

"It's called fashion, maybe you've heard of it? Or were you too busy being a traitor to find yourself a decent outfit?" Chrollo turned to look at Hisoka, who stood by the sink. Illumi grabbed a muffin and sat down at the kitchen table. It was blueberry.

"Pfft. You're still mad about that?"

"Uvogin and Paku are dead." Chrollo slammed the refrigerator door.

"Collateral damage. But don't worry, once you get your Nen back, you can fight me all you want about it." Hisoka wrung out his shirt one last time before walking away.

"How are you even friends with this guy?" Chrollo leaned back on the granite countertop and crossed his arms.

"He is not my friend." Illumi took another bite of his muffin. Chrollo tilted his head and looked at Illumi with a confused expression.

"You've been living here for a week and I still don't know what your relationship to Hisoka is. Are you his boyfriend?"

"That question is insulting. I am not his boyfriend."

"You obviously still have your Nen, so how did he trap you here?"

"I came to live here because I needed an alternative living arrangement."

"You just came to live here but you're not Hisoka's friend?"

"Assassins do not have friends." Illumi finished the last of his muffin. "I've known him for only slightly longer than I've known you, but I know what he is capable of and how he chooses his fights. He is..." Illumi thought for a moment, looking for the right word. "… _familiar_ so I moved in. Things have been stranger than I imagined since coming here."

"In what way?"

"He asked me to fight him today. He's never done that before."

Chrollo chuckled. "That man has been itching to fight me since the day he met me. He's probably still upset that I can't use my Nen and is looking to fight with anyone."

"Hopefully once you get you powers back he'll leave me alone."

"Hopefully."

Chrollo gathered the grocery bags off the table and threw them away. Illumi handed Chrollo the wrapper from his muffin, which his black-haired roommate took to throw away for him.

"You know, Chrollo. I was surprised to find you living here with Hisoka. I was worried it would be a problem considering you were already taking up Hisoka's guest room, but you're not a terrible roommate."

Chrollo breathed a short breath through his nose, almost like a laugh, but not quite. "You're not as terrible a roommate as Hisoka. So, thank you for that."

Chrollo walked out of the kitchen, leaving Illumi sitting at the breakfast table. He watched as Hisoka walked into the living room with a spray bottle and a rag. Illumi observed curiously as Hisoka scrubbed blood out of his couch and carpet.

...

Chapter 1, Fin

…...

Extra

Hisoka was awakened by the sound of a shrill scream coming from Chrollo's room. He jumped out of his fine linen sheets and ran down the hallway to see what was wrong. He'd be damned if someone got to kill Chrollo before he ever got the chance to fight him.

"What happened?! What's wrong?!" Hisoka yelled and Chrollo pointed to his closet.

"Did someone try to hurt…?" Hisoka peered into the closet and saw Illumi, hanging upside down from the rack by his feet. "…you?"

"Illumi, I told you that you couldn't sleep in closets anymore."

"You said I couldn't sleep in _your_ closet anymore."

Hisoka sighed. "Illumi, I can't have you giving Chrollo heart attacks. If you kill him, I'll have to kill you. Go sleep in the broom cupboard or something."

"It smells like dust in there."

"Then sleep on the couch!"

"…Fine."

Illumi gathered himself and left Chrollo's room.

Hisoka crossed his arms and looked at Chrollo, whose face was red in embarrassment.

Hisoka laughed before returning to his room.

Illumi curled up into a ball on Hisoka's couch and covered himself in a fortress of blankets. He fell asleep inside his cocoon, his head poking out from a small opening in the covers. The last thing he looked at was the faded stain of blood on the carpet.

…...

Fin

…..

Note:

Hello everyone! For those of you who have been reading this story, I'm doing updates of the earlier chapters! Feel free to re-read and review as you please

Thank you!


	2. Wake Up and Smell the Cyanide

Chapter 2: Wake Up and Smell the Cyanide

Hisoka lay in bed naked. He loved the feel of his soft sheets against his bare skin. He stirred awake when he smelled an aroma of coffee coming from the kitchen. As he stretched, he detected another scent. Something sweet, like a pastry. He groaned as he got up. He didn't bother putting on any pants as he left his room and headed for his kitchen.

As he walked into the kitchen, the sweet morning air surrounded him and he inhaled it, smiling.

Illumi faced away from him, pouring coffee into a mug that was hot pink and read "Cum Slut" on the front. Hisoka leaned on the counter watching his raven-haired roommate.

"You need new mugs," Illumi said as he turned around and handed Hisoka his coffee. Illumi looked only at Hisoka's face as if he was completely unfazed by his nakedness. Hisoka took the coffee mug and let his finger linger too long on Illumi's as he took it from his hand.

"Are you cold?" Illumi asked dryly.

"Ah. You _do_ know how to tell a joke."

Illumi held a green mug that read, 'Morning Sex is The Best.' He ignored Hisoka as he blew air on his coffee to cool it down.

"This coffee smells delicious." Hisoka sipped his drink but kept an eye on Illumi. He looked too irresistible blowing his coffee to cool it. The way Illumi's lips became a cute little "o," and his focus, oh god his focus. The impure thoughts Hisoka had as he watched Illumi take a drink were beginning to take effect on his composure.

"Illumi, I have to ask how you handle your morning wood. Do you, being a very non-sexual person by nature, ignore it? Or do you _deal_ with it? Hisoka looked at Illumi with hungry eyes.

"I deal with it of course. Masturbation is a good way to relive stress, too." Illumi wasn't bothered by Hisoka's sudden intrusive question.

Hisoka relished in the thought of Illumi touching himself. He set his coffee down and leaned towards Illumi to rest both hands on either side of him on the countertop behind him. Hisoka gazed into Illumi's dark eyes and sighed.

"And what is it that you think about when you 'relieve stress?'"

Illumi said nothing to answer the magician's question. He blew on his coffee again as Hisoka scraped his nails on the countertop. The sound made Illumi look at Hisoka, as it hurt his ears.

"Hisoka, it look like _you_ need to relieve stress." Illumi and Hisoka glanced down at Hisoka's dick, which was hard between them, commanding attention. Illumi blinked. "You should probably take care of that."

Hisoka smirked and closed the space between them, pressing himself against Illumi. He wrapped one hand around Illumi's waist.

"You could help me," Hisoka purred.

"Don't make me spill my coffee." Illumi held on to his mug despite Hisoka's movement. He could feel Hisoka's length against his body. He had never known how it felt to have someone so close to him without the intent of murder.

Hisoka swiveled his hips to rub himself against Illumi. He could feel Illumi's body beginning to react.

"This is... different."

"Is it?"

"You... you're putting your erection on me." Illumi felt his body become hotter. He knew the feeling of arousal, but it had always been an inconvenience for him. No one had ever stirred him up like this before.

"Illumi, have you ever had sex?"

"No, not ever."

Hisoka pressed himself harder onto Illumi and leaned in to whisper into his ear.

"We can fix that, Illumi, come and play with me."

Hisoka surveyed Illumi up close. His breathing was heavier, breathier. He seemed to grip tighter onto his coffee mug, and his face had hints of pink. If Hisoka had to guess, he'd say Illumi was turned on.

"Illumi, you like this." Hisoka's voice was dangerously low, like a growl almost.

"No." Illumi spoke in a lower voice than usual. He held his breath as he waited for Hisoka to say something. Hisoka sighed and pulled himself away from Illumi. He picked up his mug and leaned his back against the refrigerator. Illumi breathed out and relaxed.

"Fine. I wouldn't want you to have to stab me again."

The two men stood in the kitchen silently sipping their coffee. Hisoka watched Illumi, as if stalking his prey.

"By the way, this coffee is really great. How did you make it?"

"Back at home, when the butlers made coffee, sometimes they would put pieces of cinnamon in the coffee grounds before brewing it to give it extra flavor. I decided to give it a try this morning to help offset the poison I brewed into it as well."

Hisoka spit the coffee in his mouth out into the sink.

"You poisoned the coffee?"

"It's less than a lethal dose. I noticed you and Chrollo don't have a very high tolerance for poison so I decided to help you out. Chrollo seems to be doing just fine."

Hisoka's eyes widened and he stared at Illumi in disbelief. Illumi simply finished his coffee and walked over to the sink to wash his mug. "It may have been too much. The poison seemed to have a slight effect on me as well, which is surprising considering I am mostly immune."

Hisoka walked across the kitchen and looked into the living room to see Chrollo passed out on the living room floor. His coffee mug, which was bright red and read, "Fuck" on the side, lay next to his hand empty.

"Illumi what have you done?"

"I already told you, Chrollo is doing fine. He drank his coffee quickly so he'll be awake in a few hours. I'm slightly concerned about you, though. I think you took too much time screwing around. Your liver will be processing the poison for longer so you might not pass out but you'll probably feel really terrible. Of course, it depends on a number of variables how well or not you take your poison."

Hisoka felt his vision getting blurry. He took a few steps onto the carpeted living room before feeling dizzy.

"Illumi, what the fuck?" Hisoka tried to turn back to Illumi but stumbled. Illumi walked over to Hisoka and helped him stand up straight.

"Maybe you will pass out. Okay, come over here to the living room where it'll be soft."

Hisoka clung to Illumi as the room began to spin. "Fuck," Hisoka gasped, as his head began to pound in pain. He gripped Illumi's arms, trying to steady himself, but couldn't.

"Relax, Hisoka." Illumi's voice seemed to drown out as Hisoka's consciousness faded.

He hit the floor a few seconds later. The last thing he saw was Illumi's shoes.

…...

When Hisoka woke up, he lay on his bed covered in sweat. It was dark out. He rolled out of his bed, groaning at the general dull pain in every part of his body. He cracked his neck and stretched his arms, getting a feel for his body's limits. He seemed fine after about a minute. He made his way to the living room, where Chrollo sat on the couch watching the news.

"What time is it?" Hisoka asked.

"Five. In the morning."

"Fuck." Hisoka murmured and sat down next to his roommate.

"Illumi isn't allowed to make coffee anymore"

"Agreed."

The two of them sighed. Hisoka blinked, suddenly realizing something.

"Did you... or did...?"

"Hmm?" Chrollo glanced at Hisoka.

"Did Illumi carry me to my bed?"

Chrollo shrugged.

Hisoka smiled and stood from the couch. He looked around the living room.

"Where's Illumi"

"He's in your closet."

"Ah. So, he hasn't woken up yet?"

"Don't think so."

Hisoka grinned. He walked into the kitchen and brewed coffee, adding sticks of cinnamon to the grinds. Chrollo refused a cup before leaving to do research at a Library in the city.

Illumi woke up and wandered into the kitchen. He took a rainbow mug with a picture of a dick on it from the cabinet and poured himself some coffee. Hisoka sipped his coffee and grinned while Illumi moved about.

"What's got you in such a good mood this morning?"

"You know, Illumi," Hisoka spoke from where he sat at the kitchen table. "…I think you actually care about Chrollo and me." Illumi leaned his back against the countertop, facing Hisoka.

"What led you to that conclusion?"

"You poisoned us."

"And?"

" _And_... you carried me to my bed."

Illumi scoffed. "That doesn't mean anything."

"Oh, but it does. Chrollo and I hope you'll never poison us again, but from where you're from, poisoning is a way to train your body to be stronger. You poisoned us because you were concerned that we weren't strong enough."

"This is true."

"And then you carried me to my bed and Chrollo to the couch so we could be comfortable."

Illumi stayed silent.

Hisoka chuckled to himself. "You were concerned for our wellbeing, Illumi. I think that means _we are your friends._ "

Illumi sipped his coffee.

"Assassins don't have..." Illumi stopped himself mid-sentence. He sighed. "You're both kind of my friends."

"Glad to hear it." Hisoka grinned. They drank their coffee together silently.

…...

Illumi did pushups in the living room, partly out of necessity, partly out of boredom. His phone buzzed. He lay on the shag carpeting and looked at the text.

" _Don't pretend like I didn't turn you on the other day in the kitchen."_

Illumi scoffed. He typed on his phone:

 _"I don't know what you're talking about."_

Shortly after, his phone buzzed again. It was the eggplant emoji. Chrollo had told him that the Eggplant emoji was a phallic symbol. Illumi wrote back:

 _"There are worse things that can happen to you than being poisoned."_

Illumi stood up, shaking thoughts that threatened to corrupt him. His phone buzzed again.

 _"Was that a flirtation?"_

Illumi decided it was best to ignore Hisoka's texts. He got up from the floor, and again, his phone buzzed. There was an attachment to the message. He opened it, and immediately regretted doing so. It was a close-up Hisoka's erect dick. Illumi quickly wrote back:

 _"I've seen better."_

Illumi didn't even have time to look away from his phone before another message came through.

 _"Uh... Guys? You do realize that this is the roommate group chat, right?"_

Illumi saw the message was from Chrollo. Hisoka replied:

 _"Oh, don't worry, Chrollo. You can look at it too if you want"_

Illumi frowned. He typed back:

 _"What a slut."_

Both Hisoka and Chrollo seemed to be typing at the same time.

Chrollo's message read:

 _"No thank you."_

Hisoka's message read:

 _"Illu, you sound jealous. I'll only send my dick pics to you from now on."_

Illumi rolled his eyes. He looked at the message again. "… _I'll only send my dick pics to you from now on."_ He laughed. As if he cared who Hisoka sent pictures of his genitalia to.

Illumi leaned against the large window in the living room overlooking the city. He sighed and tapped his foot, seemingly anxious. He was probably getting cabin fever. He'd need to take on a job soon.

His phone buzzed again, it wasn't the group chat this time, but a private message from Hisoka. There was an attachment. Illumi opened it hesitantly.

He was surprised to see it was a picture of himself, leaning against the window, looking at his phone, smiling. A message followed.

 _"Were you hoping it'd be a dick pic?"_

Illumi looked up from his phone and saw Hisoka standing in the living room, naked.

"You need to delete this photo." Illumi spoke first.

"You were smiling." Hisoka grinned.

"No, I wasn't" Illumi asserted. "You will delete this photo."

"I have proof right here that you were smiling." Hisoka held up his phone with the same photo.

Illumi moved quickly towards Hisoka, so fast that he couldn't really see his footsteps. Before he knew it, the phone that was in his hand was in Illumi's.

Hisoka didn't protest as Illumi took hold of the device.

Illumi opened Hisoka's photo album, which was a gruesome array of pictures of dead bodies, pictures of his dick, by itself in some pictures and inside someone else in others, and at the very end, the photo of Illumi, standing against the window. He deleted it quickly and handed the phone back to Hisoka.

"Don't take any pictures of me."

"I like it when you tell me what to do."

"Ugh." Illumi's nose raised in disgust, and he walked past Hisoka.

"Where are you going?" Hisoka called after him as he approached the door to the apartment.

"Out." Illumi grabbed his key off a hook on the wall by the door and left. He closed the door behind him and caught himself sighing.

"Unbelievable." Illumi mumbled to himself as he walked away from the apartment to get some air.

…...

Chapter 2, Fin

…...

Note:

Hello everyone! For those of you who have been reading this story, I'm doing updates of the earlier chapters! Feel free to re-read and review as you please

Thank you!


	3. Fearless

"What is it?" Illumi stared into the cage sitting on the kitchen table. In it was a spider with fur about the size of Illumi's palm.

"It looks like a tarantula." Hisoka stood back with his arms crossed next to Illumi.

"Funny you should say that! They're often mistaken for tarantulas, but this is a wolf spider."

"Is it venomous?" Illumi watched curiously as the spider walked around the small case that came with it from the pet store.

"Yes! It isn't deadly, but it has excellent eyesight and quality depth-perception, making it able to pounce on prey if it needs to."

"It can jump?" Illumi asked, intrigued.

"Yes! Pretty cool, right?" Chrollo beamed.

Hisoka spoke up. "Why did you get this again?"

Chrollo smiled at Hisoka sarcastically. "Well, since I've been separated from my troupe, I've felt very solitary. I thought I should get a pet. I found this little creature that is similar in nature to what I'm going through right now! See, wolves hunt in packs and are very social creatures, but the wolf spider is a lone hunter, and spends most of its life alone. Much like myself, the wolf spider isn't much of a wolf at all."

"You didn't even ask me if you could bring a pet into my apartment." Hisoka seemed annoyed. Chrollo smiled before he spoke again.

"First of all, it is _our_ apartment. Second, I wouldn't even be staying here if _someone_ wasn't such a traitor…"

Hisoka rolled his eyes. "Whatever. Keep it. Just make sure it stays in its tank." Hisoka sighed.

"Are you scared of it, Hisoka?" Chrollo teased.

"I'm not worried about it. How about you, Illumi?" Hisoka looked over at Illumi, playfully poking him in the chest as he spoke.

"I'm not scared of anything. I'm an assassin. I kill people without remorse. I've undergone torture and interrogation most people could never survive much less imagine. I am a force be feared. I, myself, feel no fear."

Just then, the spider jumped against the glass. Hisoka and Chrollo didn't see much of what happened, just a flash of a black figure moving at a speed that could not be registered by the naked eye. It took them a second to realize that Illumi was gone. They turned around to see him in the corner between two walls and the ceiling, holding himself up with his legs and arms, panting and eyes wide with what could only be described as fear.

"Illumi, come down from there! You'll get footprints on my walls!" Hisoka rushed over to yell at Illumi.

The ceilings in Hisoka's apartment were rather high, and for a second, Hisoka admired Illumi's agility.

"It's just a spider, Illumi. It's more scared of you than you are of it." Chrollo tried to reassure him.

"That spider lunged at me." Illumi walked himself further up the walls.

"It's not even that venomous! Why are you so worried? It's not fatally venomous! You literally poisoned us with stuff that is way more lethal just last week!" Chrollo approached Illumi and stood beside Hisoka.

"Illumi, I thought you said you weren't scared of anything."

"DID YOU SEE THAT THING? YEAH, I SAID I WASN'T SCARED OF ANYTHING BUT I DEAL AND KILL PEOPLE NOT FUCKING SPIDERS LIKE WHAT THE FUCK NATURE JUST DECIDED TO MAKE AN EIGHT-LEGGED LITTLE DEATH CREATURE ONE DAY OH HELL FUCKING NO. GET THAT SHIT OUT OF HERE."

Chrollo crossed his arms, looking up at his roommate on the ceiling. "I can't return it."

"THEN KILL IT." Illumi growled.

"I'm not going to kill it!"

"Look, Illumi, Chrollo will keep it in its tank in his room at all times it won't get out." Hisoka spoke soothingly to Illumi.

"...You promise?"

"Yes! Now will you PLEASE come down?"

"…No, not yet."

"Illumi, don't make me do this." Hisoka held up his finger.

"Do what...?" Illumi observed Hisoka's finger, and then using Gyo, realized there was a string of bungee gum connecting it to his chest.

"When did you...?"

"Come down, Illumi!"

"I DON'T WANNA COME DOWN, HISOKA."

"I DON'T CARE, YOU'RE COMING DOWN."

Hisoka yanked the Bungee Gum back, bringing Illumi with it. Hisoka prepared to catch Illumi, but it was a little too late. Illumi landed on Hisoka and they both fell to the floor.

"Detach yourself from me at once!" Illumi squirmed to get away from Hisoka.

"Get off me first!"

"I'll get off you if you get your stupid Bungee Gum off of me!"

Hisoka released his hold on Illumi and they got up, disheveled.

"So much for the fearless assassin."

"Shut up. And you, Chrollo: Keep that spider in the tank or it will die." Illumi pointed a needle in the direction of the cage and glared at it.

"Don't worry! It'll be fine. By the way, its name is Hisoka Jr." Chrollo picked up the spider cage and took it to his room.

"Hisoka... Jr.?" Hisoka repeated after Chrollo had left.

Illumi shrugged. "It's fitting. He's creepy and jumpy."

Hisoka smiled. "Do I scare you, Illumi?"

"No."

Hisoka moved closer to Illumi. "You don't even know when I attached that bungee gum to you, do you?"

"It was when you poked me."

"Took you long enough."

"Why did you even feel the need to bungee gum me?"

Hisoka leaned in close. "Just in case I wanted to kiss you later."

"You'd lose your face if you did that."

Hisoka licked his lips. "It would be worth it."

Illumi's brows furrowed. "Don't you have something to do?"

Hisoka chuckled. "No, I can do this all day."

Chrollo stepped back into the room. "Hisoka," Chrollo started. "I at least have the luxury of leaving the room when I'm tired of you. Illumi literally lives here. Don't torment him so much."

Hisoka backed away from Illumi with a grin still on his face. "He likes it." Hisoka licked his teeth as he walked away to his bedroom.

…...

Later that evening, the trio watched a movie together. Some teenage drama movie that Hisoka and Chrollo told Illumi he _had_ to watch.

Hisoka ordered takeout since Chrollo had been cooking for the past week, Hisoka didn't want to cook, and Illumi was banned due to a tendency to drug the other two.

When the movie was over, Illumi went to the bathroom in Hisoka's room to shower while Chrollo used the main bathroom. Hisoka cleaned up the takeout boxes and waited in his room for Illumi to be done with the shower.

…...

The hot water steamed around Illumi, letting him relax. He knew better than to wash his hair in hot water, but he needed this. Hisoka was constantly in his face, being ridiculous.

Hisoka's words played back in his mind. _"Do I scare you, Illumi?"_

Illumi scoffed at the idea.

"What a joke. That _I_ should be scared of _him._ "

Illumi allowed the hot water to run down the back of his neck. _"Just in case I wanted to kiss you later."_

Illumi touched his lips. "He wanted... to kiss me?" His hand moved to touch the spot on his chest where Hisoka had bound the bungee gum to him. That level of planning, just to get a kiss.

He wondered what Hisoka would do to get more out of him. His hand moved lower, and he closed his eyes.

It was time to relieve some stress.

…...

Hisoka knocked on the door.

"Illumi, are you almost done? You've been in the shower for a while."

He paused, waiting for an answer. When there was no reply, he tried the door handle and found that it was unlocked. He opened the door slowly and poked his head into the room.

"Illumi?" The bathroom was filled with steam, but he could see Illumi washing suds out of his long black hair. He faced away from Hisoka, letting him see his lovely backside. Hisoka was beginning to enjoy the view when Illumi turned and threw a needle at him. The needle hit the wall to the right and behind Hisoka.

"Did I tell you that you could come in?" Illumi held two other needles in his fist.

"No, I just wanted to make sure you were okay… You've been in here for a while." Hisoka feasted his eyes on Illumi's naked body. "What exactly have you been doing in here for so long?" Hisoka's brow was raised, and his voice was suggesting.

Illumi was still turned away from him, his big round eyes staring back at Hisoka looked almost innocent. Purposefully innocent, like he was hiding something. After a pause, Illumi said, "Today is my hair day. I have to wash and fully condition it. You know this."

"I know but…" Hisoka trailed off. "…Are you...?"

"Am I what?" Illumi desperately didn't want Hisoka to know what he was just doing his shower. He didn't want him to know that he was touching himself not even moments before Hisoka opened the door.

"Nothing. Carry on." Hisoka smirked a knowing smirk before leaving the bathroom and closing the door behind him.

Hisoka walked over to his bed, the image of Illumi naked burned in his mind. He lay on his back on the bed and sighed.

"I'll have to find some way to release this tension or I'm really going to end up killing someone…" Hisoka mumbled to himself.

…...

Illumi dried his hair with a towel. It was finally silky smooth and smelled like strawberries. He wrapped his hair up in the towel, got dressed and opened the bathroom door. Hisoka was on the bed asleep. He breathed quietly.

"Clown, wake up. You need to shower."

Hisoka remained unmoved.

"You'll mess up your makeup. It'll get all over your nice sheets."

Hisoka groaned as he rolled over on his side.

"Fine." He got up and walked into his bathroom.

…...

When Hisoka was done showering, he dried his hair and brushed his teeth. He turned off the bathroom light and opened the door to his bedroom. He was surprised to find Illumi sitting in his bed reading one of Chrollo's books.

"What are you doing?"

"Reading."

"Yeah I can see that, but you're in my bed."

Illumi shifted under the sheets. "I saw something in the living room move."

"So, you're staying here tonight?"

"Yes."

Hisoka smiled and crept closer to the bed. He got on and began to slowly crawl his way to Illumi, licking his lips before he spoke again.

"Well, if you're going to be spending the whole night here, might as well…"

Illumi put his hand on Hisoka's face, stopping him from getting any closer.

"You're sleeping on the couch."

"The hell I am." Hisoka lay down on his bed and pulled the covers over him.

"Hisoka you can't stay here!"

"This is MY bed!"

"Fine. I'll throw you out myself!"

Illumi pulled the covers back and pulled on Hisoka's torso. Normally, Illumi would have no problem picking Hisoka up, but when he pulled, Hisoka didn't budge.

"Bungee Gum? _Really_?"

"What makes you think that if you of all people is scared to sleep in the living room that _I_ want to sleep there?"

"I'm not scared!"

"Then sleep on the couch!"

"No!"

"Fine! But I'm staying here."

Illumi exhaled. "…Fine. Goodnight."

"Goodnight."

Illumi turned off the lamp on the nightstand and lay on his side facing away from Hisoka. He decided that if Hisoka tried to do anything to him in his sleep, he'd kill him. He gripped his needles tightly as he drifted off to a state of half-sleep.

…...

Illumi could hear Hisoka's voice in the living room. He looked at the clock. It was 2:39 am. Illumi got out of bed and peered through the bedroom door. He could see a light on in the kitchen, and Hisoka pacing back and forth as he spoke on his cell phone.

"Machi, he's fine. I promise. You just have to trust me on this… I already told you if you have his name I can find him... Don't yell at me… Greed Island? What is that a cruise destination? …. Your guess is as good as mine. Look, I want to get Chrollo back to his normal self too, believe me. Yeah. … No promises. I'm kidding! Okay. Bye."

Illumi quietly moved back to the bed as Hisoka walked towards the bedroom. Illumi feigned sleep as Hisoka walked in and got back in bed.

Illumi's body felt heavy as he thought about Hisoka getting Chrollo his Nen back. Hisoka would definitely fight him, and one of them would die.

It wasn't like he cared or anything, or at least that's what he thought. He couldn't stop the hurt he felt in his heart. No matter how he denied it in his head, he knew that these men were not just his roommates. They had somehow become his friends. His father and grandfather had always taught Illumi that friends were not something Assassins should have. Maybe they wanted to save him from this pain. Illumi felt a warm droplet of water run down his cheek. He closed his eyes and clenched his chest, bearing the pain so he could sleep. For the first time ever in his life, Illumi felt the fear of losing a friend.

…...

Chapter 3, Fin

…...

Note:

Hello everyone! For those of you who have been reading this story, I'm doing updates of the earlier chapters! Feel free to re-read and review as you please

Thank you!


	4. Morning Breakfast

Illumi felt warm sunlight beaming on his face. He squinted and rolled over to avoid it. His arm landed on Hisoka's chest harshly, waking him up with a startled gasp.

"Is it morning already?" Hisoka rubbed his eye and yawned.

"No, it's just really bright outside for no reason," Illumi said sarcastically, keeping his eyes closed in an attempt to block out the sun.

"If you're awake enough to be cracking jokes you're awake enough to crack some eggs. Make breakfast or something."

"But you and Chrollo banned me from cooking."

"Because you've tried to kill us." Hisoka sighed.

"If I tried to kill you in any other manner you'd get an erection."

"Who said I _didn't_ get one?"

Illumi opened his eyes to glare at Hisoka only to be startled by how close he was to him, and instead of the stupid grin Illumi anticipated, Hisoka's eyes were closed with a calm expression. His red hair looked soft as it lay around his head, shining in the sunlight. His arms were stretched under his pillow, and the blankets didn't cover his bare chest. Illumi lingered on the muscles there for a moment. Hisoka was wider and buffer than he was, and now, even unflexed, Illumi could see just by how much. Illumi pulled his gaze away from Hisoka's chest to study his face. It was clean except for a streak of what looked like dried drool coming from his mouth and off to the side. Illumi chuckled.

"What's so funny?" Hisoka's eyes fluttered open, and he squinted against the sunlight as Illumi watched the light illuminate glorious gold streaks in his eyes.

"Illumi?" Hisoka spoke again after hearing no response. Illumi propped himself up on his pillow.

"You drooled in your sleep."

"I did not!" Hisoka rubbed his face, clearing off the trace of drool on his cheek.

"You also snore."

Hisoka sat up in bed, flustered, only for Illumi to see that his hair was completely flat on the side he'd been laying on.

"Illumi, why are you smiling?"

"You have bed head."

Hisoka looked at Illumi at disbelief as Illumi's smile slowly turned into a chuckle, then a laugh.

"Illumi, please. Illu- C'mon. Stop." Illumi did not stop.

"Why is this funny to you?" Hisoka grabbed Illumi's pillow from underneath him and hit him with it a couple of times. Illumi sat up to grab Hisoka's pillow, but Hisoka beat him to it, holding both pillows one in each hand.

"No fair."

"No, _YOU'RE_ no fair!" Hisoka began to pummel Illumi with the pillows windmill style. Illumi held up his forearms in defense.

"What's not fair?!"

"YOUR hair is fucking FLAWLESS. I hate it!" Illumi attempted to back away from the onslaught of pillow annihilation, but his legs were caught in the sheets.

"Damn these wretched leg traps!" Illumi yelled as feathers began to flail around in the air surrounding them. He let one of his defensive arms down to try to unwrap himself, but just as he did Hisoka seized the opportunity. The pillow attack forced Illumi on his back, giving Hisoka the chance to pin Illumi against the bed. Illumi awaited a feathery doom and closed his eyes. A second or two passed, but all Illumi could feel was Hisoka's body on top of his, and the feel of his palms against his arms holding him to the mattress. He could feel Hisoka staring at him, but when he opened his eyes to stare back at him, instead of the hungry shine in his eyes that he had grown accustomed to, Hisoka gazed at Illumi with no smirk or grin or baring of teeth.

"What are you doing?" Illumi could feel his heart beating hard inside his chest. For some reason, this side of Hisoka seemed more dangerous than the 'hungry wolf' that he usually was. Illumi waited for Hisoka to say something, but there was no response.

"Hisoka?"

"Illumi, I'll have to kill you one of these days." Hisoka continued to stare at Illumi.

"And why have you decided this?" Illumi watched as Hisoka's gaze moved across his face until he was looking at Illumi's neck. Hisoka let go of one of Illumi's arms so he could use his own hand to softly trace his finger against the curve of his shoulder. Illumi breathed calmly as he did this, watching as Hisoka's stare drifted back up to Illumi's face.

"You're too dangerous to keep around anymore." Hisoka released Illumi's other arm.

"You pinned me to your bed and you say that _I'm_ the dangerous one?"

"If I don't end you, you'll probably be the death of me." Hisoka's hand rested against the side of Illumi's face. Illumi's body betrayed him as he pressed his face against Hisoka's hand, allowing him to feel the warmth from it. Hisoka sighed as he let his thumb trace over Illumi's lips. Illumi closed his eyes.

"Illumi…" Hisoka breathed out the name in a low voice. "What were you thinking about last night in the shower?"

"Hisoka…" Illumi sighed Hisoka's name before he could think about what he was saying. "I don't know what's happening..." Illumi had always known that Hisoka tried to make him uncomfortable on purpose, but when he had other intentions Illumi could always read it. This was not bloodlust. It was something pure and deadly. Illumi had seen it happen in other people, but never experienced it himself. He wrapped his free arm around Hisoka's back, feeling the curves and edges of his muscles. Illumi was feeling lust.

Hisoka kissed Illumi. Illumi closed his eyes, kissing back. Fingertips that were once touching his face were now sliding down his chest. Illumi pulled Hisoka in closer as he kissed him, his hands reaching up to grip his fingers in Hisoka's hair. Hisoka pressed his hips forward, and Illumi could feel Hisoka's dick rubbing against him over his clothes. Illumi and Hisoka broke their kiss for air. Hisoka looked down at Illumi dumbfounded.

"What are we doing?" Illumi's voice quivered as he felt Hisoka's hand slide further down his abdomen.

"Do you want me to stop?" Hisoka asked. Illumi opened his eyes and stared at Hisoka's ceiling. He could feel clarity begin to crawl back into his bloodstream. This was Hisoka with his hand against Illumi's pants. Illumi wondered what the repercussions would be if he let Hisoka continue. Was he really about to let Hisoka violate his body in this manner?

"Don't…"

Hisoka sighed and began to pull his hand away from Illumi, but Illumi grasped his wrist and forced it to stay.

"Don't stop." Illumi let go of Hisoka's wrist and placed his hand underneath Hisoka's jaw and stared at Hisoka's eyes. Hisoka smiled a tiny smirk before pressing his lips against Illumi's. Hisoka slid his hand into Illumi's pants. Illumi opened his mouth to gasp as he felt Hisoka's fingers wrap around his length. Hisoka's mouth opened to meet Illumi's. The Zoldyck assassin had never kissed anyone like this before, but he tried to meet Hisoka's movements. Hisoka pressed his thumb against Illumi's tip and swirled the dripping fluid around. Illumi moaned at the sensation.

"Do you like this?" Hisoka pulled away from Illumi to watch his face. Illumi's normally pale face was flushed red and his eyes were shut. Illumi felt his hips acting on their own, moving up into Hisoka's hand.

"I..." Illumi began to speak softly and quietly. Hisoka leaned closer to hear him.

"Is this what you thought about when you touched yourself in my shower last night?" Hisoka teased. Illumi moaned as Hisoka stroked him.

"Hisoka..." Illumi sighed the name like a prayer.

"Yes?"

"I want more." Illumi whispered into Hisoka's ear. Hisoka sighed and quivered at the sound of Illumi's voice. He kissed Illumi's neck, and then moved to kiss his collarbone. Hisoka slid his free hand up and underneath Illumi's tank top. He found Illumi's nipple and circled his thumb around the soft skin. He listened for Illumi's sighs and soft moans. He raised Illumi's top and paused to study Illumi's skin. It wasn't a blank canvas. There were scars and dark spots here and there. He knew they were scars of torture, and Hisoka wanted to mark it further.

Illumi opened his eyes in time to see Hisoka swirl his tongue around in circles against Illumi's exposed nipple. Illumi arched his back to press against Hisoka's mouth. Hisoka's teeth softly bit into Illumi's skin, earning a whimper from the man underneath him.

"Hisoka…" Illumi lifted his hips up and pressed himself against Hisoka, and Hisoka pressed against Illumi. The both of them found themselves grinding against the other under the sheets. Illumi wrapped his hands around the back of Hisoka's neck. He looked at Hisoka's face, which had now turned red. His red hair dangled around his face as he looked down at Illumi.

"Illumi, let me taste you." Illumi nodded, then watched as Hisoka crawled backwards towards Illumi's waist. He kissed the muscles down Illumi's abdomen. Every once in a while, he would circle his tongue on his skin before biting, causing Illumi to whimper. He grabbed Illumi's hips and lifted them up to slide his pants off, freeing Illumi's dick.

Illumi gasped as Hisoka ran his tongue from the bottom of his shaft to the tip. Hisoka swirled his tongue around the head, making Illumi moan. The sensation was incredible. Hisoka lowered his mouth to engulf Illumi further. Illumi grabbed hold of Hisoka's hair as Hisoka sucked on Illumi. Illumi never would have guessed how warm it felt to have Hisoka's mouth around him.

"Oh… fuck." Illumi's voice hardly sounded like his own as Hisoka pushed Illumi further down his throat. Illumi listened to the slurping noise Hisoka made as he slid back up. Illumi could feel his senses running wild. Hisoka again began to take Illumi into his mouth.

Illumi wanted to be careful but couldn't help thrusting forward into Hisoka's face and pushing down on the back of his head. Hisoka made a low humming noise that sounded like a muffled moan, and the vibrations from his throat drove Illumi wild. Hisoka would gurgle every so often, and just knowing that Hisoka was choking on his cock was a powerful concept that sent Illumi's mind soaring.

Illumi ran his fingers down the side of Hisoka's face as he worked. Illumi lifted his head so that he could see Hisoka looking up at him. Hisoka pressed Illumi's cock against his cheek and let it slide out with a popping sound. Illumi whimpered and watched the string of fluids connecting his head to Hisoka's puffed lips.

"You like that don't you?" The playfulness in Hisoka's voice sent waves through Illumi.

Illumi sighed and lay back as Hisoka pushed Illumi's legs apart. He could feel his hands push against him so that he was completely exposed.

"Illumi, you're so beautiful here." Illumi didn't have much time to react as he felt Hisoka's hot tongue begin to press against his ass.

"Hisoka? Hisoka!" Illumi stammered as the new sensation overtook him.

"Shh." Hisoka shushed him before swirling his tongue around the outside of Illumi and then pressing it into his entrance. Illumi's first instinct was to close his legs around Hisoka's head in a death hold, but sensing this, Hisoka pushed Illumi's legs up and apart, further allowing him access to push his long tongue into Illumi.

"Fuck, Hisoka…" Illumi could feel his pre-cum dripping onto his abdomen. He reached to stroke himself while Hisoka lapped his tongue against Illumi. Hisoka let go of one of Illumi's legs and brought his hand up to Illumi, pressing a finger against Illumi's opening. Illumi moaned loudly as he felt Hisoka's finger slide into him. He could feel every joint of Hisoka's finger as Hisoka pumped his finger back and forth, making Illumi squirm. Hisoka curved his finger inside Illumi and smiled when Illumi yelped as he touched his prostate.

"Do you like this?" Hisoka purred.

"Ah!" Illumi could only moan as Hisoka played with him. His mouth hung open as the magician with the sinister smile pumped his hand back and forth inside him.

"I'll take that as a yes." Hisoka pushed against a delicious spot inside Illumi that made him mewl like a kitten.

"Another…" Illumi moaned as Hisoka inserted another finger into him. The feeling was strange, but Hisoka reached to stroke Illumi's dick, making him feel good while he adjusted to the new width inside him. Hisoka observed Illumi's face and burned the image of his body into his mind.

"Illumi…"

"Yes?" Illumi gasped.

"I want to be inside you." Hisoka pushed himself up so that he could be near Illumi's face again. Illumi rested his hand on Hisoka's shoulder.

"Yes. _Please._ " Illumi begged.

"Ooh." Hisoka looked into Illumi's eyes for any sign of hesitation but found only desire. "I've never heard you act so polite."

"I want you do it. I want you to be here…" Illumi slid his hand down to his entrance and slid his own finger inside alongside Hisoka's two that were already there. Hisoka bit his lip as he watched Illumi finger himself.

"Have you ever fingered yourself?" Hisoka asked. Illumi nodded a quick "no," and Hisoka smiled.

Hisoka sat up and slowly took his fingers away. Illumi kept his finger in and stroked his shaft while Hisoka backed away and retrieved a bottle from his nightstand. He poured a slippery liquid into his palm and rubbed it onto his cock. Illumi admired Hisoka's muscular physique as he did this. He was handsome, sure, but Illumi's eyes widened when he saw Hisoka's dick.

"Has... Has it always been that big?" Illumi questioned nervously.

Hisoka chuckled proudly. "You've only ever seen me when I'm _kind of_ hard. You still sure you want to go?"

Illumi swallowed. "I want it all…" Illumi could feel the empty space above him begin to grow cold without Hisoka there to warm it. Hisoka smiled.

"Come here." Hisoka grabbed Illumi's ankle and pulled him closer to the edge of the bed. Hisoka lifted Illumi's hips up and pulled Illumi's finger out of himself.

"This is just for me now, Illumi." Hisoka said with a grin. He rubbed his tip against Illumi's entrance. "This is aaall mine." Hisoka's low voice sounded like a growl, and his aura changed into something primal.

"I want this," Illumi whispered. Illumi stroked his dick as Hisoka pressed his head into Illumi's hole. Illumi moaned loudly, and Hisoka quickly covered his mouth with his free hand, shushing Illumi.

"Chrollo might still be asleep." Illumi nodded and calmed down.

"I'm going to push a little farther now." Illumi took a breath and nodded. Hisoka leaned his hips forward into Illumi. The pressure was strange, almost painful.

"Breathe, Illumi." Hisoka caressed his hands on Illumi's abdomen.

Illumi gasped, not realizing he had been holding his breath. The walls inside him seemed to relax, and Hisoka fully sheathed himself inside Illumi's ass. Illumi moaned softly. He couldn't think about anything else but Hisoka and what they were doing. His mind was clouded by the sensations of it all.

"Illumi, are you okay?" Hisoka leaned close to Illumi's face. Illumi didn't want to open his mouth for fear of moaning too loudly, so he kissed Hisoka instead. Hisoka kissed him back, then gripped onto Illumi's hips.

"Hisoka," Illumi whispered. "Fuck me."

Hisoka thrust against Illumi with a groan.

Illumi stroked himself with one hand and brought the other to his mouth. He bit on the back of his hand, trying to control his noise before wrapping his legs around Hisoka and pulling him forward so that he thrusted against him again.

"Fuck," Hisoka swore as Illumi swiveled his hips against him.

"Hisoka…" Illumi moaned the name against the back of his hand.

Hisoka looked down at Illumi to see him panting hot breaths. His expression was something to behold. His half-lidded eyes glossing over at Hisoka through long eyelashes pulled Hisoka in hypnotically, like a spell. Illumi turned his head to the side, trying to escape Hisoka's knowing stare, but Hisoka wouldn't have it.

"Look at me," Hisoka's raspy voice commanded Illumi.

Illumi closed his eyes as Hisoka fucked deeper into him, not obeying Hisoka's request. Hisoka reached his hand to Illumi's throat and forced his face forward.

"Illumi, let me see your face." Hisoka angled himself lower to thrust into Illumi again, and Illumi's eyes opened and he whined.

Hisoka smiled at the whining assassin beneath him. His eyes still had the beautiful glimmer of desire in them.

He loved how Illumi couldn't help but push himself into every beat of Hisoka's rhythm. Illumi was thoroughly undone. Completely devoid of any reservations, Illumi was enjoying himself.

Illumi let go of the hand he was biting and grabbed hold of the sheets underneath him. Hisoka bit his lip, holding in moans of his own while Illumi squirmed. It was Hisoka, only Hisoka who had ever made Illumi move that way. It stroked his ego to know it; that he was Illumi's first.

Illumi could feel the rush of sensations bringing him closer to climax.

"Hisoka, I'm gonna…" Illumi bit his lip before he could finish his sentence. Hisoka picked up his pace as he felt himself close to the edge of pleasure. Hisoka looked down to see where they were connected. He loved watching the motion of their hips slam against each other, and the sight of Illumi being stretched so much was euphoric.

"Not yet." Hisoka commanded.

Illumi moaned as Hisoka's thrusts turned less rhythmic to more carnal. Illumi tried to hold back moans and yelps, but before he knew it even his breaths became whines. With each sound Illumi made, Hisoka felt himself drifting closer to madness. With a shudder, Hisoka let his body take him over the edge. Illumi felt Hisoka's thrusts become slower as he felt something hot fill his insides. Illumi stroked his dick to bring himself to ecstasy. He closed his eyes as he listened to Hisoka's final groan. His body curled forward and he tilted his head back as he moaned out the magician's name.

"Oh, Hisoka…" Illumi felt the rush of his fluid pour out onto his abdomen. Hisoka pulled himself out of Illumi and lay down next to him to watch his orgasm. Illumi sighed after the last drop flowed over. He turned to look at Hisoka, who looked back at him with a grin.

"I never thought I'd get to see you moan like that." Hisoka wrapped an arm around Illumi and rested his head on Illumi's chest.

Illumi calmed his breathing. His thoughts were clearer now than they had ever been, and a new calm washed over him.

"Is this what you're always after? " Hisoka could hear the annoyed tone in Illumi's voice when he spoke.

"What do you mean?"

"You just wanted to have sex with me, right? So will you leave me alone from now on?" Illumi listened for a response, but Hisoka fell quiet.

"Illumi, I…"

"You what?"

Hisoka sighed, not wanting to admit how long he'd wanted to see Illumi undone like he was.

"I'll be leaving soon."

"How soon?"

"Tomorrow, maybe. Chrollo and I need to chase a lead I found on someone who can help him get his Nen back." Illumi gently pushed away Hisoka's arm as he began to sit up.

"Good thing you got that out of your system before you left then." Illumi got out from underneath Hisoka and off the bed.

"Illumi, I didn't _just_ want to have sex with you, I-" Hisoka started.

"So then what was it? Did you just want to humiliate me, then? Make my pleasure some kind of triumph for you?" Hisoka placed his head in his hands as he sat on the edge of the bed, watching Illumi gather his pants off the floor and put them on. Illumi felt a slight pain in his step, but the hurt he felt in his stomach and in his heart choked him like no other noose.

Illumi could recognize some of the feelings he was experiencing. He could even name them: anger, disappointment, frustration, embarrassment… but there were other feelings he couldn't put his finger on. He reached for the door handle but grasped air as it opened from the outside and swung away from him. Chrollo stood at the threshold wearing an apron borrowed from Hisoka's pantry. It was frilly and pink and had the words 'Blow the cook' embroidered onto it. Chrollo seemed surprised to see Illumi there, half naked and his hair a mess.

"Um, so like, I made pancakes," Chrollo said awkwardly, not knowing what to ask or say.

Illumi said nothing as he walked past and into Chrollo's room.

Chrollo heard the door to his closet slam.

"So, pancakes?" Chrollo looked at Hisoka, who was very much naked. Chrollo couldn't help but notice the smell of sex still lingering in the air. He decided not to say anything about it.

Hisoka sighed and stood up from the bed. Hisoka walked towards the door and closed it without a word.

Chrollo sighed and walked back to the kitchen, ready to eat pancakes by himself. "Those two are going to end up killing each other," Chrollo mumbled to himself.

…...

Chapter 4, Fin

…...

Note: This chapter has been updated from its original form.


	5. Like Poison for Chocolate

…...

Please read disclaimer at the bottom thank you

...

…...

Illumi replayed Hisoka's words over again in his head as he sat on the roof of the apartment building overlooking the city. His eyes stared out at the people down below, but he only saw Hisoka's face.

…...

"Illumi, you're so beautiful here."

…

The wind howled as it swept through the city's many skyscrapers, but Illumi could only hear Hisoka's voice.

…...

"This is just for me now"

….

The echoes of Illumi's morning encounter still weighed heavy on Illumi's mind. He had sex. Actual, _real,_ sex, with Hisoka. No matter how many times he replayed it, he had to admit, he liked it. What troubled him further, was that he wasn't expecting it to be as... _intimate._.. as it was. The compliments, the eye contact... It was a lot more _involved_ than Illumi expected.

Just as he thought it over again, he sensed Chrollo open the roof access door.

"Illumi?" Chrollo sat next to the sulking assassin on the apartment roof. The wind blew gently, just enough to make Chrollo shiver. Illumi held his knees to his chest, hoping somehow, they would protect him from his own thoughts.

Chrollo opened his mouth to say something, but Illumi spoke first.

"I thought I had Hisoka pretty figured out. Now I'm just confused." Illumi didn't look away from the bustling scene.

Chrollo cleared his throat, "Okay, I understand you want to have a heart-to-heart with me, but I just came up here to see if you wanted to come down yet."

"Sex with him wasn't at all like I imagined it would be."

"Illumi, buddy, the _last thing_ I want to talk about is what sex with Hisoka is like."

"Some of the things he said were more possessive than I was ready for."

"Yikes. I can see you're very busy sulking, so I'll leave you to it." Chrollo stood up with a grunt. He began to turn around but was interrupted by a soft tug on the leg of his pants. He looked down to see Illumi's long fingers holding the hem of his pants, keeping him from leaving.

"Do you really plan on fighting Hisoka when you get your Nen back?" Illumi's voice was just loud enough to hear over the wind.

Chrollo sighed, placing his hands in the pockets of his jacket. "You know I can't let him live after what he did."

"Even after all of this?"

"All of _what?_ Did you think that just because we live together and braid our hair sometimes I can forgive him for helping that blond-haired brat kill members of my troupe?"

Illumi quietly thought about his own role in the grand orchestrated betrayal that set Chrollo against Hisoka. Illumi knew his relationship with Chrollo, strange as it was, would probably sour if Chrollo found out that Illumi disguised himself as Hisoka. It probably also wouldn't help that Illumi's reasoning for helping Hisoka was simply because Illumi knew Hisoka longer. After having been forced to live with both men, he questioned the logic of how he placed his loyalties. All things considered, he still knew Hisoka better than he knew Chrollo, and would probably choose him again.

…

A gust of wind blew through the air between them. Illumi slowly turned to look at Chrollo. His face was stone cold like it always was, but even Chrollo didn't need to look twice to see the shattered expression that Illumi wore.

"I've never seen this side of Hisoka before."

Chrollo sighed before speaking again. "Illumi, you know Hisoka. You know he is sneaky. He is a liar, and above all else, _he's a transmuter_. I hate to break it to you, but anything and _everything_ he says and does has a purpose, and it's not always clear at first what that purpose is. He _always_ has an agenda." Chrollo watched Illumi follow along with his words closely, saying nothing. Chrollo continued, "Hisoka most likely has hidden intentions. Besides... you're probably not the only person Hisoka has wrapped up in his tricks."

"What do you mean?"

"To put things in simply, Hisoka wants you to be a side hoe."

"…a side _who now?_ "

Chrollo sighed. "Like, you know… _a side hoe_. Someone who you have sex with, but you don't get too attached to."

Illumi blinked. "That's absurd. I am no side hoe."

"You might say that, but to Hisoka, you're just… another fun time. Why do you think he didn't bother to tell you he was leaving until after he deflowered you? He didn't want to get into your emotions."

"Good thing I don't have any then."

"You don't have any what?"

"Emotions. I was trained as an assassin to have as few emotions as possible."

Chrollo scoffed."I'm going to go ahead and call bullshit on that. You are literally on the roof like an angst-filled teenager. You have emotions, because like it or not, you are a human being."

"No, I am an assassin."

"God _dammit_ Illumi. You may be an assassin but that doesn't make you any less of a person. You have emotions and you're going to have to deal with them. If you're not coming down I'm going out to eat. Hisoka is cooking and I cannot have any meal alone with him anymore. This morning after your little hiccup he bungee gummed my coffee mug to the table and I'll be damned before he pulls another one on me." Illumi listened to Chrollo's footsteps grow fainter as he walked away. He said nothing as Chrollo left the roof; he simply glared at the tiny people going about their lives down below. He watched unblinking and unforgiving until his stomach grumbled.

"I suppose I should eat." Illumi sighed. He left the roof and headed downstairs to see about dinner.

…...

As he walked into the apartment, his senses were bombarded with pleasant smells and sounds. He meandered to the kitchen following the echoes of a knife chopping against a wooden cutting board and the scent of freshly cut vegetables. He had always loved being in the kitchen when the butlers would prepare dinner. He loved the smell of the different spices and sound of sizzling meat on a pan. He could feel his tongue watering as the faint sounds of popping oil sang on the back burner. He knew that it was Hisoka cooking right now, but he didn't really believe it until he saw him in standing at the counter with a knife in hand. Hisoka was shirtless and his hair was a hot mess, still not brushed or styled.

It was the first time Illumi had really seen Hisoka's back in full lighting. The scars on his back were clear now, and most of them looked like they had been acquired through fighting, but there were a few that Illumi recognized as scars only dealt through a precise and methodical torture. Illumi did his best to ignore the questions bubbling up inside him.

"You can keep staring at my sexy butt or you can make yourself useful," Hisoka said, not turning away from what he was doing.

"I wasn't staring."

Hisoka turned his head to great Illumi with a smirk. "Ah, but you agree my butt is sexy?"

"No," Illumi said as he walked to the sink to wash his hands. As he rinsed his hands he observed the contents of the counter and the stove. He could see that Hisoka had already prepared what appeared to be some kind of tentacled sea creature. It sat on a pan near the back of the stove, ready to be added to whatever dish Hisoka was cooking up. In front of Hisoka were vegetables and spices waiting to be cut and separated.

"You look like you need help." Illumi smiled and picked an apron off the wall.

Hisoka nodded. "Just don't poison me again."

Illumi smiled to himself at the thought of adding a lethal dose of arsenic to Hisoka's food as he selected a perfectly sharpened knife to cut the bell peppers. He tied an apron around his waist and got to work next to Hisoka.

"What are we making?"

"Paella. It's a Spanish dish."

"A _what_ dish?"

"Spanish, like from the country? Spain?"

"What?"

"Spain. España."

"Spain?"

"Yeah."

"You're making that up."

"What? No, I'm not. Spain is a country with a rich history and-"

"Bullshit that's not a country. Never seen it on the map."

"Illumi, it's a country. They speak Spanish and have really awesome guitars. In fact, my favorite music happens to be-"

"Okay man, whatever you say," Illumi spoke skeptically.

Hisoka pouted but continued his chopping as Illumi stared at the bright red peppers in front of him. They looked perfectly ripe and their scent was potent as Illumi sliced into them precisely and evenly. He worked quietly as he listened to Hisoka's blade quickly chopping against the cutting board in front of him. Illumi felt calm, but he noticed several times that the soft chopping noise coming from where Hisoka was working would sometimes pause. The silence was almost always followed by the sound of a sniff. Illumi looked to his left and saw Hisoka rubbing his eyes with the back of his right hand – knife still held tight.

"Hisoka?" Illumi stared at the shirtless man beside him, and it was at that moment that Illumi saw Hisoka's puffy eyes let a tear escape and roll down his cheek.

"Hisoka... Are you okay?"

"I'm sorry."

"What's wrong?"

"I…" Hisoka trailed off as he looked at Illumi. He wiped his face again with the back of his hand and blinked a couple of times before speaking again.

"Are you... crying?"

"My… eyes are just so sensitive whenever I chop onions. I tear up just about every time." Illumi looked down at Hisoka's chopping board to see the onion he had been chopping finely.

"Onion?"

"Yeah, sorry that I look like a mess right now."

"I thought you were crying."

"Nope, just onions." Hisoka smiled and tilted his head.

Illumi squinted at Hisoka for a moment, but eventually looked away from the smug face of the jester and continued to slice the pepper in front of him. Hisoka rubbed his eyes then chopped the last of the onion in front of him.

"That's unsanitary." Illumi mumbled to himself.

"Hey, Illumi..."

"Hmm?" Illumi didn't bother to look away from his cutting board.

"I... I didn't mean to hide from you that I was leaving. I was going to tell you first thing in the morning but-"

"But then you fucked me instead." Illumi looked over to Hisoka as he finished slicing the second pepper.

"If I remember correctly, it takes two to tango." Hisoka leaned on the counter, smiling at his roommate.

"What else do you need me to slice?" Illumi was clearly not amused. Hisoka sighed.

"If you could mince some garlic, I'd appreciate it."

Illumi grabbed two cloves of garlic.

"Illumi," said Hisoka as he poured oil into a pan, "I don't want you to think that I just wanted to mess around before I left. I honestly didn't expect _that_ to happen."

"Sure." Illumi's voice was indifferent to Hisoka's apology.

"Right…" Hisoka watched Illumi silently for just a moment. His face was expressionless and calm. There was something beautiful in that way, and Hisoka wondered if when Illumi was older if he'd have less wrinkles than most. Hisoka smiled, then gathered the peppers and chopped onion and scraped them off the cutting board and into the pan with his knife. Illumi leaned on the counter by the sink and crossed his arms.

"Whatever you're trying to do, I won't buy it." Illumi spoke as he watched Hisoka stir the vegetables with a wooden spoon.

"Illumi I'm just trying to apologize."

"Don't think for a second that I actually trust you."

"I never asked you to trust me, I just don't want you to think ill of me."

"Since when have you given a damn about what I think of you?"

Hisoka met Illumi's stare. "Do I sense a tinge of bitterness?"

"Not in the slightest," Illumi said coldly. "Do you need anything else?"

Hisoka sighed and pointed his spoon at the jar of rice sitting on the counter behind Illumi. "Pour about two cups into that bowl over there," Hisoka commanded.

The assassin scoffed but moved anyway and worked in silence to pour out the long grain rice. Hisoka shifted his weight onto one foot. "Illu, I don't want you to be mad at me."

"I am not angry with you, I just think it would be best if we never have sexual relations again."

Hisoka was silent for a moment, and Illumi hoped that he would leave the conversation at that, but Hisoka had other plans. "Did you not have fun?"

Illumi's brows furrowed. He _did_ have fun. He enjoyed himself very much, but Hisoka didn't need to know that. Illumi turned to look at Hisoka. "I'd rather chew glass than do that again."

"Harsh words... but that wasn't what you were saying in my bed this morning." Hisoka lowered the heat on the stove and mixed in the garlic before leaving the pan unmonitored to creep in close to his roommate. Illumi focused his eyes on the faucet next to him as he tried to conceal the visible heat coloring his face. Hisoka closed the space between them as he whispered into Illumi's ear,

"In fact, I think the exact words you used were 'Yes, _Please_.' I think in all the years I've known you, I've never heard you say such polite little words."

Illumi felt the rush of blood pumping through his body as if Hisoka's taunting stirred up something inside him. His heart beat faster in his chest and he knew Hisoka could sense his discomfort. He quickly pushed Hisoka off of him and scoffed. "I won't fall for your tricks, magician. I refuse to be another one of your side hoes."

"I'm sorry, did my ears deceive me or did you just say side hoes?"

"Do not mock me! You and I both know what this morning was about. You got your way this time but never again, you uncultured slut!"

"Ouch. Illumi I don't think you're-"

"No. I get it, I really do. You're out to humiliate me. I won't have it. I'm not your toy."

"Illumi, what I'm saying is-"

"And another thing, I don't care what your intentions were by not telling me that you were leaving, but it still would have been nice to know being your roommate and all."

Illumi halted mid-sentence as Hisoka held Illumi's face in his hands. Illumi grabbed hold of Hisoka's wrists to try and stop him from getting any closer. It was only then that Illumi realized his breathing was harsh and quickened.

Hisoka's gold eyes stared into his, and Illumi swallowed. He blinked, trying to remember to breathe, and his heart began to calm. He opened his eyes carefully and breathed in slowly before facing Hisoka's stare at full force again.

"Illumi," Hisoka whispered, "I wasn't trying to embarrass you, and I don't... I don't have _others._ "

"I highly doubt that." Illumi shifted his eyes trying to escape Hisoka's stare. Hisoka gently tilted Illumi's face back to face him.

Illumi's nose crinkled. "Stop that. Your hands smell like onion."

"I don't go around sleeping with people for kicks and giggles." Hisoka's eyes were wide with intent.

Illumi didn't struggle against the contact. "Fine. I believe you," Illumi said with a huff. Hisoka smiled. "Are we good then?"

"No, we're not. Why didn't you tell me you were leaving?"

Hisoka shifted his weight to one foot. "I didn't tell you that I was leaving because I honestly didn't think about it. This morning when I woke up the only thing I could think about was how delicious you looked. Everything left my mind when I saw you looking at me the way you were. You looked at me like you thought I was beautiful. I got drunk off of that and everything became hazy like a dream. I know it was stupid of me not to tell you, but I don't want you to feel hurt because of me."

Illumi stared at Hisoka. There was a silence in the kitchen, and between the two of them, words unspoken. The air was thick with the words Illumi was trying to pull together. Things he wanted to say.

Instead of saying what he wanted to, he went with: "Who said I felt hurt?" Illumi crossed his arms, hoping his face wasn't still red.

Hisoka smirked. "Illumi, it's obvious you like me."

So, he _was_ still red. "No, you're just full of yourself."

Hisoka leaned closer to Illumi slowly. The distance between them was already alarming, but as Hisoka continued to close the space, Illumi couldn't help but focus on Hisoka's lips, which were slightly parted. Illumi followed suit and opened his lips as their faces met. Hisoka moved his hand from Illumi's face to rest on the counter behind him. Illumi could feel weight backing him against the sink counter. Their lips moved together in harmony.

The sounds of sizzling in the background mixed with the soft sound of their kissing. And there he was again, kissing Hisoka, and letting it happen. He needed to stop the kiss. He had to, but he didn't.

Hisoka pulled back first. "The garlic is burning," Hisoka's voice was somewhere between a whisper of a statement and a tease.

Illumi stood, dazed and dumbfounded, not saying anything as Hisoka turned away to tend to the stove. He stirred vegetables around in a large pan, saying nothing as he worked. Illumi noticed Hisoka's calm expression, as if he didn't ever need to concentrate much on what he was doing. The way he moved suggested he was cooking from memory.

"Illumi, the rice." Hisoka's voice brought Illumi out of his observation. He took the rice, and following Hisoka's instruction, poured it into the pan with the vegetables.

They worked quietly together for some time without further incident.

Hisoka stayed near the stove, watching the dish cook. Illumi took to clearing the counter of the cutting boards and knives. He cleaned the table and set down Hisoka's only pair of plain white plates. They were the sole collection of dishes Hisoka owned that didn't have some sort of vulgarity on them. Illumi silently thanked whatever deity was up there that Hisoka had at least these. Illumi gathered two wine glasses out of the cabinet and rinsed them off.

"Hisoka, what should we drink?"

"You can pick something from the wine closet." Hisoka spoke as he remained at the stove, carefully watching the rice.

Illumi poked his head into Hisoka's wine closet. It had a decent selection, and Illumi pulled a few bottles from their cubbies to look at them. Nothing really interested him until he pulled a green bottle with gold labeling.

"Hisoka?" Illumi called out.

"What is it?" Hisoka yelled back.

"Where did you say this dish originated?"

"Spain!"

Illumi studied the bottle. It read, "Esmeralda's 'Spanish Fly' Sangria. Hecho en España. Made in Spain."

Illumi mumbled to himself again about how he was certain 'Spain' wasn't a real country.

"'Kay thanks." Illumi took the bottle with him to the dining table and poured a glass for himself and Hisoka.

"Dinner is served," Hisoka gleamed as he set the pan on the table and spooned out a serving for the two of them onto each plate.

Illumi took off his apron and hung it back on its rack. Hisoka had not bothered to put on a shirt, and Illumi knew Hisoka had noticed that it made him uncomfortable.

"Is everything alright?"

"Hisoka, why do you insist on eating dinner naked?"

"I'm not naked."

"The butlers never would have allowed any of us to even go outside our rooms without proper attire much less show up to dinner without a shirt."

"Is that why you dress the way you do?"

"Pardon?"

"Nothing."

Illumi squinted at the grinning magician but decided to ignore him and enjoy the food. Illumi hated to admit, but it was damn near perfect. Hisoka took a sip from his glass and smiled.

"What's so funny?"

"Which bottle did you pull from the rack?"

"That one." Illumi gestured to the bottle sitting at the edge of the table where Chrollo usually sat. Hisoka squinted at the bottle and then at Illumi.

"I'd like to start by saying that I only accept apologies in cash or sexual favors."

"Excuse me?"

"Your apology."

"For what?"

"For-"

Illumi was reaching for his glass for another sip, but Hisoka quickly placed his hand over the top of it to stop him.

"I'm afraid I cannot let you drink any more of that Sangria."

"Hisoka, we've been through this. I can handle my liquor."

"Not this one."

Illumi glanced down at his drink and Hisoka's hand, then back at Hisoka's face.

"You've poisoned me."

"That's where you're wrong. You poisoned both of us. Again."

"I have done no such thing."

"Ah, so the fact that you picked this bottle and didn't immediately put it back tells me that you probably have no idea what's in this."

"Impossible. I have extensive knowledge of poisons." Illumi yanked the bottle off the table to read the label. "Esmeralda's 'Spanish Fly' Sangria."

"Spanish Fly, my dear Illumi, is a powerful aphrodisiac." Illumi looked at Hisoka bewildered.

"You know how people eat oysters or asparagus or even chocolate because they think that it'll put them in the mood to have sex?"

"No, that doesn't make any sense."

"Yeah, most of them don't really work."

"Oh, but then why do people-"

"People get horny and want to seduce other people by the means of food but that's not the point, Illumi."

"What is the point then?"

"Spanish fly actually works, and boy does it work well. It only works on men, but it can be deadly. Even the smallest overdose can cause an erection lasting so long to require hospitalization and you just served it to both of us in a wine glass."

Illumi glanced to the bottle and then back to his wine glass. "Why the hell would you have this in your wine cellar?"

"Fuck I don't know maybe I stole it from someone I killed who poisoned people with it on the regular but that's not the point here, Illumi! This is a PAINFUL way to die if we've overdosed on it. How much did you drink?"

"I..." Illumi glanced at his glass. "It's half full still!"

"FUCK that means it's half empty!"

"Is that bad?"

Hisoka didn't miss a beat as he jumped across the table at Illumi and began to frantically tug at Illumi's pants.

"Hisoka!" It was at this point that Illumi noticed his whole body felt hot and that his pants were tight against him. He could feel his blood rushing through him and as he looked down he could tell he was already getting a boner.

"Well, that's new." Illumi said to himself.

"Take off your pants!"

"I don't want-"

"Illumi I'm not kidding take off your pants!"

"At least kiss me first!" Illumi covered his mouth as soon as the words left his lips.

Hisoka ceased his attempt at the pants in front of him to look up at Illumi, who looked back at him with an expression Hisoka had not seen on Illumi's face before. His eyes were wide and his face was flushed.

"Okay," Hisoka smirked and straddled Illumi's lap, slowly moving closer to Illumi's face.

Illumi was painfully aware of Hisoka's erection, as well as his own. And yet Hisoka was dragging out this moment, trying to savor watching Illumi get excited.

But Illumi was too uncomfortable and Hisoka was taking too long.

Illumi quickly pulled Hisoka's face towards his own. Hisoka kissed back for a moment, and Illumi could feel him grinding against his lap. The assassin could feel Hisoka's curves sliding against Illumi's bulge through the layers of their clothes. The pressure building in his pants was becoming too tight as Hisoka swiveled hips against Illumi. Hisoka pulled away, and as their spit still connected the two of them, they studied each other's faces with dilated pupils and bright red faces like animals in heat.

"Illumi," Hisoka sighed, "...we don't have a whole lot of time. Take your pants off."

"But my butt is still kind of tender."

"It's okay, I can ride you but we need to hurry." Hisoka stood up and reached into his back pocket for a small packet.

"I guess the paella will have to wait." Illumi said jokingly. Hisoka slid his pants off and Illumi undid his belt, following Hisoka's lead and slipping his pants off quickly.

"Fuck the paella." Hisoka sat on Illumi's lap, straddling his legs. He cut open the packet with his teeth and squeezed out a clear liquid.

"Lube?"

"Lube."

Hisoka rubbed the slick lubricant onto Illumi. Illumi breathed in as he felt Hisoka grip onto him, the slick lube making a lewd noise that only made Illumi's head feel lighter. He watched Hisoka as he stretched himself with his fingers quickly, lubing his insides for Illumi.

"Damn." Illumi whispered. Hisoka bit his lip, as he fingered himself on Illumi's lap, completely naked, as if putting on a show for him.

Illumi stroked himself as he watched, mesmerized.

"Do you want to see a magic trick?" Hisoka's voice was low and hoarse, and Illumi gathered his own voice would probably not be much better. He nodded, and Hisoka smiled.

"I can make your dick disappear." Hisoka closed his eyes as he lifted his hips and guided Illumi's dick to touch his entrance, and said, "Now you see it,"

"Hisoka, I already have to fuck you please don't make it any weirder." Illumi stopped talking as he felt Hisoka begin to slide his hips down onto Illumi.

"Now you don't" Hisoka started to chuckle but went into a groan as he bottomed out against Illumi's hips, feeling all of him inside.

The encompassing warmth tantalized Illumi as he watched Hisoka's expression carefully. His mouth hung open and his eyes clamped shut, Illumi found this version of Hisoka quite enjoyable.

"Hi-Hisoka..." Illumi allowed his hands to slide up Hisoka's legs to his abdomen, then his chest. Every curve and edge of him breathed into his palms. Every inch of skin Illumi could touch was hot against his fingertips.

"Fuck, Illumi I knew you were big but right now you feel _unbelievable_." Hisoka slid his hips up again, only to bring it back down while grinding down in a circle. Illumi thrusted upwards against Hisoka, and much to Illumi's delight, made him yelp in a high-pitched moan.

"You moan like a slut."

Hisoka chuckled, "You know you like it."

Illumi grabbed hold of Hisoka's ass and bounced him up and down against his lap. Hisoka's red face was a work of art that Illumi enjoyed viewing as he moaned. His brows were furrowed and his eyes were half closed. His mouth stayed open, allowing every breath and moan to escape with ease. Illumi wanted more, but he could also sense Hisoka's skin become alarmingly feverish. He glanced down to see Hisoka's raging erection twitching with anticipation. The elixir was definitely doing a number on the magician.

"Hisoka, hold on to me." Hisoka wrapped his arms around Illumi's neck. Illumi lifted Hisoka up with ease as he stood to clear space on the table. He pushed aside his plate and knocked over his glass as he laid Hisoka against the table's surface. The dark Sangria spilled onto the white tablecloth, and Illumi looked to see if Hisoka would be angry that the tablecloth was ruined, but when he saw Hisoka smiling and moving the way he was, he knew exactly far gone his roommate was.

"Illumi," Hisoka purred. "Fuck me hard."

"Fuck." Illumi felt a shiver run down his spine as Hisoka spoke. He pulled out of Hisoka and grabbed him by his arm.

"Turn over." Illumi demanded.

Hisoka bit his lip as he flipped himself over. As Illumi began to position himself properly to re-enter, Hisoka reached to pull his ass up and apart, allowing Illumi to see everything.

"You even get ready for me like a slut."

"Call me slut again."

Illumi wasn't sure at first what to do, his mind went blank.

"Fuck me already" Hisoka whined

Illumi, almost instinctively slapped Hisoka's ass. "You don't get to tell me what to do."

"What if I say please?"

"That's better... _slut_ " Illumi thrust forward into Hisoka, and sighed as he heard the beautiful sound of Hisoka's moan. He reached around to caress Hisoka's dick, which was dripping with precum. Hisoka's hips jerked around slightly as Illumi began to stroke his partner with a tight grip.

"Fuck you feel so good." Hisoka's hands had moved away from his hips and now grasped at the tablecloth. Illumi drove his cock into Hisoka, much to Hisoka's enjoyment.

"You like this don't you?"

"Nobody fucks me as good as you, Illumi!"

"You would know, wouldn't you, little slut?"

"Yes I would! Ah! I- I'm a cumslut Illumi!" Illumi grabbed Hisoka by the neck and held him down. He leaned forward to whisper into Hisoka's ear.

"You're a disgusting, filthy slut."

Hisoka whined and writhed as Illumi spoke. Illumi picked up the pace in his hand and with his hips, ravaging Hisoka. Hisoka met each ram from Illumi with a twirl of his hips, allowing them to grind against each other at every meeting. The symphony of their hot skin against each other and Hisoka's moans combined with Illumi's grunts and sighs echoed in the empty apartment. The half-eaten rice lay cold on the table next to the vulgar scene unfolding on the dinner table on top of Hisoka's favorite tablecloth, now stained with a mixture of body fluids and red sangria. As the food grew cold, the symphony neared its climax.

"I-Illumi I think I'm gonna- Ah!" Hisoka writhed as his orgasm washed over him and he came on the table and floor beneath him. Illumi moved his hand away from Hisoka's dick, now fulling concentrating on finishing himself. Grunts seemed to leave his mouth from his throat involuntarily as he fucked Hisoka against the table, bringing himself to finish. He thrust forward, and leaned on top of Hisoka's back, biting him on his shoulder as he came inside his roommate.

Hisoka groaned in pain at the sensation, and Illumi let his bite grip release at the sound. He pulled out and watched his cum drip out of Hisoka's ass and onto the floor.

Hisoka panted. "Fuck."

"Fuck, indeed." Said Illumi.

"What the fuck?" Said Chrollo.

…...

Chapter 5, fin

...

DISCLAIMER

THE APHRODISIAC, SPANISH FLY, IS REAL AND DEADLY. DO NOT ATTEMPT TO CONSUME IT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. IT CAN CAUSE BLISTERS IN THE PENIS AND IS AN AWFUL WAY TO DIE. DO NOT ATTEMPT. I REPEAT. DO NOT ATTEMPT. LIBERTIES HAVE BEEN TAKEN WITH THE INGREDIENT FOR THIS STORY'S PURPOSE. IT IS ACTUALLY QUITE UNPLEASANT AND DOES NOT WORK EXACTLY HOW I HAVE WRITTEN IT TO WORK FOR THIS CHAPTER. ONCE AGAIN, I URGE YOU NOT TO ATTEMPT ACQUIRING SPANISH FLY. IF YOU DO ATTEMPT TO CONSUME, I AM NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR DECISION TO HAVE A REALLY BAD TIME.

DISCLAIMER OVER

…...

I re-wrote / edited this chapter because let's be real I love writing smut and this was one of my favorite chapters to write.

Just FYI I'm going through the earlier chapters and updating them as I go because like when I originally wrote these I didn't really edit them all too well and English is my second language so like I've learned a lot (I hope) since then.

...


	6. Mess

"You sluts better make some room for the Holy Spirit," Chrollo scolded as he threw his jacket into Hisoka's car and sat in the front seat.

"Don't look at me, this is entirely Hisoka's fault!" Illumi spoke defensively, shutting the door behind him. Hisoka sat to his right, and just like the other backseat passenger, still had a very noticeable erection that would not go down.

"How is this MY fault? YOU picked the wine!" Hisoka yelled.

"Why do you even have that wine?" Illumi asked as he uncomfortably pulled his seatbelt across his torso and lap.

"Everybody shut the fuck up!" Chrollo commanded. "Illumi, I guarantee you I won't be looking at you anytime soon after what I fucking saw you doing, Goddammit. You HAD to do it on the motherfucking table, where we eat! What the fuck did I tell you earlier, hmm? Didn't I tell you this bitch was crazy? You could've fucking called poison control or called someone else to take your horny ass to the hospital but no. No, you just had to fuck him. You fucked the clown. Congratulations, you're a clown fucker."

"I'm a magician," Hisoka interrupted. Just then, Chrollo turned his face to the two in the back, and it was at that point, judging from the crazed look in Chrollo's eyes, that they had fucked up.

"YOU SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH HISOKA."

Hisoka shut his whore mouth, allowing Chrollo to speak again.

"Now I hope you two are happy. NOT ONLY is that image burned into my corneas; I GET TO BE THE LUCKY SONOFABITCH WHO GETS TO DRIVE YOU PERVERTS TO THE HOSPITAL." Chrollo huffed and sighed before turning back around and starting the car.

Hisoka and Illumi sat in the back seat trying to ignore their stinging erections while Chrollo blasted gospel music on the radio the entire way to the emergency room. Before reaching the Hospital, Illumi changed his appearance to mimic a man he saw walking on the sidewalk. By the time they checked in, Hisoka was doubled over in pain. Nurses tried their best not to giggle as they took both Hisoka and Illumi's vitals and rushed them into a treatment room. Chrollo waited with them in their room for the doctor. He sat patiently in the corner next to Hisoka's bed, reading a magazine he found in the waiting room.

"You didn't have to do this for us," Hisoka mumbled.

Chrollo looked up from the literature in front of him to make a face at Hisoka.

"I wasn't about to let you die." Chrollo flipped a tab open from a page of the magazine and sniffed a sample of perfume.

"Why not? Then you wouldn't have to worry about me coming after you anymore."

Illumi watched Chrollo carefully as he stood up from his chair in the corner and walk slowly to Hisoka's bedside.

"Silly magician." Chrollo purred as he slowly placed his hand against Hisoka's face in a gentle manner. "I wouldn't let you die…" He leaned in close, and his hand slowly wrapped itself around Hisoka's neck. "If you're going to die because of me…" Chrollo's hold on Hisoka became hostile, forcing Hisoka to choke. "…You're going to die painfully, publicly, and by me at full power."

"H-Hisoka!" Illumi tried calling out, but his throat caught when he saw the look on the other hospital patient's face. He had seen that particular look from Hisoka before. He was smiling, and he was enjoying every bit of what was happening to him. It was almost as if his entire body was glowing. He was powerless against the man holding him down, and the thought of Chrollo killing him in the manner he was describing was like dirty talk to his ears. Hisoka's face was red and flushed, and he bit his lip and rolled his eyes back.

"You're disgusting." Chrollo lifted his hand from Hisoka's neck and walked back to his seat.

Illumi was still halfway seated up and facing Hisoka when the doctor walked in. She asked him to lie back, and he went through the motions of obeying her and answering the doctor's questions when she asked them. The nurses injected an IV needle into his arm without issue and administered an antidote before dripping fluids into his bloodstream. Another team set up Hisoka in the same manner. Illumi couldn't tell how many minutes had passed by as reality became slightly warped. The next thing he knew, a man in scrubs and a clipboard was leaving as Chrollo walked up to Illumi's bedside.

"You two are lucky you're both Hunters. You get rushed treatment with hardly any questions asked."

"Chrollo, I… where… are we still at the hospital?"

"Yep. You'll both have to stay here overnight so they can continue to monitor your vitals."

"How long have we been here?"

"Maybe three hours."

"Oh damn." Illumi changed back to his own image, relaxing his Nen.

"How do you feel?" Chrollo asked.

"It doesn't hurt anymore."

"That's good, but they say you're blood pressure is still kind of high and the... swelling isn't completely gone."

"Chrollo… is Hisoka…?" Illumi started trying to push himself up, but Chrollo pushed him back down to the bed."

"He's fine. He's asleep. You really need to rest. The doctor said you two sped up the process by having sex. It wouldn't have been this bad if you just stopped moving around and called me to take you to the hospital."

"Hisoka said-"

"Hisoka's stupid. Don't move around too much."

Illumi nodded and lay down on the hospital bed. Chrollo had returned to his seat and taken to mumbling to himself as he read an article about celebrity feuds. Between the mumbling and Hisoka's soft snoring, the still air created a deafening quiet. Before he knew it, Illumi was asleep.

He woke up the next morning to the sound of rustling sheets. He turned to see Hisoka sitting up in his bed, flinching at the needle moving in his arm.

"Morning."

"Good morning."

"Did you sleep well?"

"No."

"Me neither. Where's Chrollo?"

"I don't know I just woke up." Hisoka looked around the small room. Illumi sat up and slid his legs off the side of the bed. The floor was cold against his bare feet.

"Maybe he stepped out for a minute."

"Without his jacket?" Hisoka's tone was concerning. Illumi looked where Chrollo had been sitting. His jacket still hung from the back of the chair, and the magazine he was reading lay open face down on the floor next to it.

"How far does your En reach?" Illumi asked, hurriedly. Hisoka didn't hesitate to close his eyes and begin meditating. His arms were crossed and he focused himself on his aura. Illumi could see the pink bubble surround Hisoka. As it grew, it reminded Illumi of the image of someone blowing a bubble in gum. It engulfed the room, and Illumi watched as Hisoka's concentration became more strained. It wasn't long before the bubble seemed to pop, and Hisoka let out a sigh.

"Well I don't see him on any of the floors ten stories above or below us. Something is concerning me, though. I don't know who but someone is watching us."

Illumi sighed before crossing his arms. "I guess there's no point in trying to hide our location or identities. I usually don't use my En if I can avoid letting other Nen users that there's a Zoldyck nearby. Be ready to leave immediately in case anything happens."

"Got it." Hisoka scrambled to pull on his pants as Illumi began his En. Illumi's En was dark green and filled the room quickly. Hisoka slipped on his shoes and gathered Illumi's clothes and placed them on the bed next to him.

"He's not anywhere in the hospital. Someone is trying to conceal his presence. We have to go." Illumi stood up and began dressing. He stopped hurrying after pulling on his shirt.

"Why aren't you hurrying? I thought you said we had to go?"

"There's no point. He's here."

A small figure in a kimono stepped into the room.

"I hear you're getting discharged today."

"Kalluto."

"You know brother, even though you don't live in the mountain anymore, you're still a Zoldyck. One picture of you could sell for millions, and yet here you are announcing your presence at a public hospital with your En. Mother would be so upset if she knew what you were doing."

"Why are you here? I thought Father and Mother wanted me gone. Why would they send you?"

"I'm not here on family business, but you made your location so obvious I had to stop by. We're brothers after all." Kalluto smiled.

"Um, excuse me, a picture of Illumi could sell for how much?" Hisoka interrupted, but was promptly ignored.

"You said you're not here on family business. What are you here for, then?" "That's personal. You shouldn't worry about it though. You obviously have your hands full with your new plaything."

"If you're referring to Hisoka, he's not my plaything. He doesn't mean anything to me."

"If you think I'm dumb enough not to have done my research before coming in here you have obviously lost your mind. I know why you're here and what you did. When I read it, I thought maybe they had the wrong Illumi Zoldyck. Because the Illumi I know doesn't let himself get poisoned this badly and then make it worse by… well you know what you did. I had to step in and see for myself if it really was you."

"It was a poison my body was unfamiliar with."

"Right, because it only works on men, is extremely painful, and doesn't always kill its victims. Mother and Father built up our immunities against much stronger poisons, which work very differently. I understand, but you still let yourself be poisoned. Not only that, but you sped up the process. I never pinned you for a pervert, brother."

"I am not a pervert. Where's Chrollo?"

"Chrollo?"

"Don't play dumb. You know very well who he is."

"Oh, you mean Chrollo Lucifer? I haven't heard much about him since Father and Grandfather had that fight with him. Have you been in contact with him since then?"

"Where is he?"

"I'm guessing you think I've had something to do with Chrollo's disappearance. I assure you brother; I'm not interested in him. I hear he's wondering the world without his Nen or his troupe."

"You sure hear a lot for someone who doesn't know much."

"I have my sources, although not all the details are always so clear."

"I'll ask you again, Kalluto. Where is Chrollo?"

"He was gone when I got here."

"How long?"

"About an hour ago. It's only been you two in the room since then. Not even a nurse or a doctor."

Illumi stood quietly, thinking. Hisoka stepped forward.

"If you had anything to do with this…" Hisoka stopped as Illumi placed his hand against Hisoka, stopping him. Illumi's aura became heavy and the air around Hisoka became tight and cold. Illumi's hair gently lifted as his aura swirled around him.

"Do. Not. Threaten. Him." Illumi's voice was low and vicious. Hisoka took a step back and he lifted his hands in surrender. Illumi's bloodlust calmed and he faced Kalluto.

"Why are you really here, watching me?"

"You were in a hospital, asleep. You're guard was down. I came to make sure no one who could harm the family got a hold of you. You know many secrets that could lead back to the family."

"You said you weren't here on family business."

"Yes, I'm in Yorknew on a job, but I saw you yesterday on the roof of a building. I assumed you were on a mission, so I didn't bother you. I did my job and was heading back this morning when I caught a known weasel from the press running with a story that you were in the hospital. I didn't believe it, but I killed him anyway in case it was you. I got here and there was no sign of Chrollo. You know the rest."

"Any word on Killua?"

Kalluto glanced over at Hisoka. Illumi looked over his shoulder at the redhead. He sat on the bed making a house of card, gently placing each card one by one.

"He's okay." Illumi said. Kalluto nodded.

"Last more or less official report came from an unwilling Milluki. Killua was at the island Gon grew up in. They were together. Milluki has been acting strange since then. Sightings put Killua possibly here in Yorknew, with that boy. For whatever reason they seem to be attempting to raise money."

"He should never have to be on the streets like that."

"Mother and Father didn't mind putting you out. Maybe it'll be good for Killua to-"

"I'm what's good for Killua! He'll see. He'll soon learn that he only brings misery to those who aren't his family. One of these days he'll hurt his friends and then he'll see just what kind of killer he is!"

The house of cards on Hisoka's bed faltered and cards fell to the floor, scattering as they slid against the smooth surface.

"Oops." Hisoka said with a smile.

"Illumi, I have to be leaving now. Be careful. I don't know how that reporter came across the information of your location, but you better watch yourself."

"I can only thank you for watching out for me."

"That's what family does. Nothing can replace family." Kalluto glanced at Hisoka, who waved him goodbye. Kalluto turned and left the room.

"We have to leave right now immediately." Illumi said in a hurried pace.

"On it." Hisoka pulled his finger up, and all the cards flung towards his hand at once. Illumi quickly changed his face to that of a woman's, and pinned his body to become more feminine. They crept out of the room and out of the hospital without raising any flags. Illumi drove them home.

As soon as they got home, Illumi unpinned his body and returned to looking like his usual self. He sensed an oncoming threat, and dodged one of Hisoka's deadly cards.

"What was that for?" Illumi said, offended.

"At the hospital, you wanted to kill me. More than you've ever wanted to kill me. You oozed your bloodlust for me all over the hospital. I want to know why."

Illumi threw a pin, and Hisoka leaped for safety over the counter overlooking the living room into the kitchen. Illumi rolled behind the couch.

Illumi watched carefully for movement on the reflection of the glass windows that overlooked the city. There was no sound or movement. He decided to call out to Hisoka. "You seem angry. I thought you liked it when people try to kill you."

Just then, feeling Hisoka's presence against his backside, Illumi turned around ready to stab, but Hisoka stopped Illumi's wrist and grabbed hold of Illumi's neck.

"Don't get me wrong- I was very aroused," Hisoka purred before leaning closer and whispering, "but until today I've never had the pleasure of being the target of such exquisite bloodlust from you, assassin."

Illumi shoved Hisoka away from him, not sure as to how Hisoka was able to sneak up on him.

"Confused, are you? Were you wondering how you didn't see any movement in the windows?" Hisoka twirled a card in his hand as he spoke.

Illumi glanced at the windows, only now realizing that Hisoka was right. There was no movement at all coming from the windows. It was as if paintings had suddenly replaced the view of the city– still and lifeless.

"Texture Surprise?"

"Guilty! Now..." Hisoka twirled his finger and smiled. Illumi knew it was too late for him, because he could see the line of bungee gum connecting Hisoka's finger to his wrist where he grabbed him. "...You're going to tell me why you almost killed me at the hospital." Hisoka yanked Illumi forward and quickly moved out of the way to avoid the needles in Illumi's fists.

"You were about to threaten my brother." Illumi winced as a card sliced into his collar. Using his free hand, he threw a pin needle at Hisoka, which landed in his forearm. Hisoka's face was less amused but still grossly suggestive.

"And what was that you said to Kalluto? Hmm I think it had something to do with the idea that Killua was going to hurt his friends?"

"It's inevitable."

"And how are you so sure?" Hisoka asked as he threw a card, this one landing in Illumi's arm. A needle struck Hisoka's chest and another nicked his neck.

"It is in Killua's nature as an assassin." Illumi kept himself upright as Hisoka yanked him forward again. Illumi leapt up and ran across the ceiling to a corner.

Hisoka pulled Illumi off the ceiling sending him directly towards him. Illumi took advantage of the momentum and punched Hisoka in the face before jumping back and away from him.

"You did something to Killua, didn't you? What kind of big brother are you?" Hisoka watched Illumi completely ignore the card that now stuck out of the side of his neck.

"You wouldn't understand. Killua is abandoning everything he has been taught as an assassin. Friends are obstacles that will end up getting hurt or killed in the end." Illumi landed a needle into Hisoka's left arm just as a card sliced into his thigh.

"If anything happens to Gon because of Killua…" Hisoka pulled another card and readied himself to throw it at the assassin.

"Killua will abandon Gon if he isn't sure he can defeat his enemy." Illumi threw another pin into Hisoka's chest, and as it sunk into Hisoka's flesh, Illumi anticipated a return attack from a card that never came. Instead, Hisoka stared at Illumi with a confused expression.

"What?" Hisoka asked, angrily.

"Killua will abandon Gon."

Without a word, Hisoka began to close the distance between them. Illumi didn't hesitate to start throwing pins at the approaching psychopath. Pins flew through the air, one scraping skin off the side of Hisoka's cheek, another hitting him in the shoulder. Illumi soon stopped when Hisoka was right in front him, a human pushpin doll. Hisoka put his thumb over Illumi's mouth, and with his sharp nail, cut into his bottom lip. Illumi stayed silent as blood dripped down his chin, despite his body's desire to whimper.

"Illumi you are demented."

"As if you're one to talk."

"If Gon dies, I will kill you."

"Wouldn't you like that?"

"No, I wouldn't, Illumi. I wouldn't like to kill you, but if you have given me no choice…" Hisoka pressed his nail deeper into Illumi's lip, letting it bleed over his finger.

"If you don't kill me right now, you'll never get another chance."

"Says who?"

"Me."

"You seem very sure about all this."

"As sure as my aim with a needle."

"Then I guess I better kill you."

"That's probably in your best interest."

"But I want to kiss you instead."

Illumi felt his face fluster and his brows furrow. He had readied a needle to the back of Hisoka's neck, but looking into he eyes of the man inches from his face, his grip on the pin loosened.

"Then kiss me."

Hisoka smirked before leaning forward and gently pressing his lips against Illumi's. Golden eyes stared brightly at Illumi as Hisoka's pupils dilated after tasting the iron in the assassin's blood. Their lips moved in sync with each other. Illumi closed his eyes, and Hisoka followed suit. They breathed heavily and grasped at each other. Illumi dropped the needle in his hand and wrapped his arms around Hisoka's neck.

As they parted and gasped for air, Illumi licked his lip.

"I hate you, Hisoka."

"Good." Hisoka pushed Illumi against the large windows facing the city.

"Tell me you hate me." Illumi pulled his shirt off as Hisoka undid his belt. Pins and Cards covered in each other's blood fell to the floor.

"I don't hate you." Hisoka kissed Illumi again, both hands pressed against the glass. Blood smeared between his palm and the window.

Illumi grabbed the bottom of Hisoka's shirt to pull it off. "You should learn to hate me." It'll be easier."

"Shut up and take your pants off."

"Demanding, today, are we?" Illumi smiled as he slid his hands down his body to his pants, undoing them. He watched Hisoka bite his lip, and Illumi took pleasure in moving slowly so Hisoka had time to see him.

"Tell me you despise me." Bright red blood dripped from the cuts in Illumi's pale skin.

"How can I despise something so beautiful?" Hisoka dropped to his knees and licked a trickle of blood on Illumi's abdomen. A shiver went up Illumi's body as he felt Hisoka begin to massage Illumi's dick over his underwear.

"Hisoka decide if you want to kill me or fuck me already." Illumi looked away from Hisoka and awaited a response. He gasped as he felt the warm and wet feel of Hisoka's mouth around his tip.

"Hi- Hisoka!" Illumi grabbed hold of Hisoka's undone hair. Hisoka's lips formed a seal around Illumi's cock, and he began sucking. Illumi moaned and looked down at the man at his hips. His eyes locked on to the brilliant gold ones staring back up at him.

"You're too good at this." Illumi grunted softly as Hisoka slid Illumi further into his mouth. Illumi pushed Hisoka's head further down and gently thrust forward. Hisoka lifted his head and opened his mouth, sticking his tongue out. He rubbed the bottom of it across Illumi's tip. Saliva and precum dripped from Hisoka's chin. Illumi could see Hisoka's dick trapped in his pants. Hisoka was about to go down on Illumi again, but Illumi stopped him.

"Hisoka, let me…" Illumi blushed as he thought about saying what it was that he wanted to do. Hisoka grinned, still holding Illumi's dick in his hand.

"Let you what?"

"I don't want to be the only one getting… you know…"

"Sucked off?"

"…Yeah."

"Come here then." Hisoka leaned back and lay down, propping himself up with his elbows. Illumi kneeled down and pulled Hisoka's boxers down. His cock nearly hit Illumi on his face, and it was wet from the tip.

"Fuck," Illumi said, making Hisoka smile. He licked Hisoka's shaft from the base to the tip, then began skillfully bobbing his head up and down with his mouth around Hisoka's throbbing cock. He glanced up at Hisoka, and from what he could tell; he was doing a good job. Hisoka's eyes seemed to be in a dream state, half closed and watching everything Illumi was doing.

"That's right, suck it for me." Hisoka's low voice made Illumi's head swim with desire.

"Me too." Illumi said before turning around. Illumi was over Hisoka's body, facing his dick. He felt Hisoka begin to suck on him, so he grabbed hold of the dick in front of him and began to suck. The sound of slurping and gentle moaning permeated the space around them. Illumi could feel Hisoka's finger press against his hole. Illumi moaned as Hisoka pushed a finger inside.

"Hisoka!" Illumi said, muffled.

"Don't talk with your mouth full, silly." Hisoka chuckled lowly. Illumi moaned as Hisoka stuck another finger into his ass.

"Keep sucking." Hisoka commanded. Illumi brushed his hair behind his ears before going at Hisoka's dick again. Illumi's chin was still smeared with blood, but now it was mixed with his own saliva and Hisoka's precum. Illumi couldn't help but moan as Hisoka pumped his fingers into Illumi.

"I'm going to fill this tight little hole…" Hisoka said as Illumi moaned. The vibrations from his throat felt nice to Hisoka.

"Hisoka…" Illumi said as he came up for air. He turned his head back and Hisoka smiled from the view of Illumi's face. "Give… give it to me." Illumi said. Hisoka could almost feel his soul leave his body.

"Fuck could you get any sexier?" Hisoka slapped Illumi's ass before getting out from under him and picking him up, placing his back against the cold glass window. Illumi held on to Hisoka as they kissed. Illumi let one leg drop from Hisoka's, letting Hisoka push his fingers into Illumi again. Illumi leaned his head back to moan and Hisoka bit the skin where Illumi's neck met his shoulder.

"Wait! Hisoka, please, not here. The windows!"

Hisoka grinned and placed his palm underneath the leg that he still held at his waist, and pushed it up and over his shoulder.

"Hisoka. Really? Here?"

Hisoka grinned and said nothing in response. He guided his cock to Illumi's ass and pushed his tip in. Illumi locked his teeth together and flinched.

"Does it hurt?" Hisoka caressed Illumi's face, and Illumi shook his head.

"Deeper." Illumi panted. Hisoka obliged, and Illumi closed his eyes, feeling the pressure with his body. Hisoka waited for a moment before moving again.

"How does it feel?" Hisoka asked.

"I want more."

Hisoka pushed Illumi's leg off of his shoulder and turned Illumi's body so that he faced away from Hisoka and towards the view of the city. Hisoka pressed his elbow against the small of Illumi's back, forcing Illumi to arch his back and stick his ass up higher.

"You're always asking for more, It's almost if you like it."

"Fuck I love it."

"Say it again."

"I- I love it! I love getting fucked."

"Look who's the slut now." Hisoka grabbed a handful of Illumi's hair and pulled it back. Illumi's hands pressed against the glass, as if Hisoka's thrusts would somehow push his body through the window. Illumi gasped when he felt Hisoka reach around and grab his dick.

"Fuck."

"You love getting fucked against my window?"

"Y-yeah!" Illumi moaned out.

"Your ass feels good. It's tight just for me." Hisoka leaned forward and bit the back of Illumi's neck. Illumi's hot breaths fogged up the glass in front of his face. Hisoka thrust forward and pushed Illumi up against the glass completely. Hisoka reached up and touched Illumi's nipples, which were hard from the shock of the cold glass. Illumi's moan was high pitched, and Hisoka kissed the spot on Illumi's neck where he had bit.

"Fuck." Illumi said as Hisoka became more frantic and moved faster, less methodical.

"Illumi, I'm going to-"

"Inside."

"What?"

"Inside me, do it inside me."

"Fuck!" Hisoka bucked forward, and his hands gripped tightly onto Illumi as he jolted from the tiny waves of shivers. He pulled out of Illumi, letting his cum drip out from Illumi's ass.

"Illumi… Illumi…" Hisoka whispered. Illumi watched Hisoka's face in the reflection of the window.

"Hisoka, Are you-" Before Illumi could finish speaking; Hisoka turned him around and kissed him. Illumi could feel Hisoka's hand rubbing up and down his dick. Illumi leaned his head back as Hisoka dropped to his knees again. Hisoka quickly sucked on Illumi, and it wasn't long before Illumi came into the magician's mouth. Hisoka gulped the brunt of Illumi's cum, the rest spilling out and onto Hisoka's chin.

"Now look what you've done, you've made a mess of me." Hisoka said, smile on his face. Illumi scoffed.

"Not before you made a mess of me, first." Illumi could feel Hisoka's load still seeping down his leg. "I'm going to shower."

"I'll be joining you soon." Hisoka said slyly. Illumi walked quickly to the shower. More than anything he wanted to feel clean again. He had spent the night at the hospital after the fiasco with the wine, and it felt good to finally not smell like bodily fluids. Dried blood washed off his chest and chin. He could hear the door open and footsteps. Hisoka opened the shower door and stepped in.

"Hello, gorgeous."

"Hisoka." Illumi acknowledged the magician. Illumi lathered shampoo into his long black hair.

"Let me help you." Illumi turned to face the wall, letting Hisoka massage his head. Illumi closed his eyes and enjoyed the feeling. He had never let anyone touch his hair like this before. Not even the butlers ever had the privilege since he was young. Hisoka's fingertips moved in circles, careful not to scratch his scalp with his nails.

"Time to rinse!" Hisoka chimed. Illumi rinsed his hair out, but kept an eye on the other man in the shower. Hisoka's blood joined Illumi's on the shower floor as he pressed his shampooed hair up into a Mohawk.

"What do ya' think?" Hisoka smiled and showed Illumi his hair.

"I like it. It's less ridiculous than the way you usually wear it." Illumi didn't laugh or smile, but Hisoka knew he was joking.

"You're so mean!" Hisoka whined playfully. Illumi moved out from underneath the showerhead to condition his hair. Hisoka rinsed off, and as Illumi bent over to get the bottle of conditioner, Hisoka slapped his butt.

"Hey!" Illumi looked back at Hisoka, who grinned back at him. Illumi ignored him and conditioned his hair. When they were done showering, Hisoka suggested they take a bath. He had a bath bomb that turned the water purple and smelled like lavender. Illumi agreed, and they filled the large tub with water and threw the purple bath bomb in. Hisoka sat down first, then Illumi. They sat across from each other. Hisoka had his legs stretched out while Illumi held his knees to his chest.

"The water smells nice." Illumi cupped his hands in the glittery water.

"May I take a picture of you?"

"What, so you can sell it and make money? I don't think so."

"No! So I can see your face when I'm gone."

"You're still leaving tonight, aren't you?"

"I've already made plans to hunt a person down. My window of opportunity is short. If there's any chance getting Chrollo's Nen back I've got to leave tonight."

"Even though we still don't know where he is?"

"I'm sure he's fine. He probably ran off while we were unconscious. He's probably the one who tipped off the press that you were in the hospital."

"He wouldn't do that."

"Yes he would. He works like that. If he had a camera he'd probably take a picture of you and sell it. He's always after money." Hisoka scoffed. Illumi lowered his head to rest on his knees.

"You won't need a picture of me."

"Why's that?"

"When you leave today, we're through." Illumi kept his eyes locked on the light purple water. The bathroom was quiet. The only sounds were the echoes of the water. Hisoka didn't say a word, so Illumi decided to speak again. "I'll be gone when you come back. I'll lock up your apartment so your things will be safe. If you want, I'll destroy the key."

"Why?" Hisoka's voice was breaking, and Illumi looked up to see Hisoka's eyes were red and his brows were furrowed.

"This life isn't mine. I shouldn't be with you. I can't be with you. You're going off to chase someone down and you expect me to stay here, waiting for you? I- I'm an assassin. I only bring pain to those around me. The only ones who understand me are my family."

"Illumi I already know that you're an assassin. I already know you'd double cross me. You'd abandon me if you needed to. I don't care. I can take care of myself. You don't have to stay here if you want. You can go do jobs and if you hate it here we can get another apartment or a house or whatever. I just want you to- no, I need you to be with me."

"You don't understand. I wish I wasn't the type of person that you would have to expect me to double cross you. I wish I could be the kind of person who you didn't have to watch your back but I'm not."

"Illumi if you were any different than you are right now I wouldn't want you."

"You say that now, but you're leaving."

"I can't take you with me!"

"It's not that I want you to take me with you it's that…"

"It's that what?"

"You're going to find Chrollo. And you're going to find a way to get his Nen back. Both of you will fight and one of you will die. If it's Chrollo, then I'll hate you. If it's you, then I'll hate Chrollo. But if it's you, I don't think I would forgive you. I'd have to kill Chrollo. Then both of you will be gone."

"Illumi I can't say what's going to happen while I'm gone. I don't know how long I'll be gone and I don't know if there will be anyway to communicate with you if something happens. I understand if you don't want to deal with that. It's hard emotionally. But please don't hate me. I just want to fight him."

"You sure you don't want to fuck him?"

"What?"

"Do you want to fuck Chrollo?"

"Well, I wouldn't be opposed to it if he offered, but I don't actively want to screw him."

"Hisoka if you want me to be with you I have to be the only one."

"Of course."

"I mean it."

"I mean it, too. Is that what you were worried about all this time?"

"Among other things, yes."

"What can I do to ease your worry?"

"…Promise you won't have sex. With anybody."

"Done."

"Say it."

"What?"

"Say 'I promise I won't have sex with anybody else'."

"I promise, on my life, that I won't have sex with anybody else."

"Cross your heart?"

"And hope to die." Hisoka cut a small 'x' on his chest over his heart with his nail. Illumi smiled.

"Your turn."

"I promise I won't have sex with anybody else."

"Cross your heart." Hisoka said, nodding his head.

Illumi crossed his heart in the same manner Hisoka had, cutting a small 'x' into his chest.

"And hope to die."

"See? Do you feel better?"

Illumi moved forward and straddled Hisoka's lap, kissing him. Purple water sloshed around the tub.

"Hisoka, I love you." Illumi spoke before realizing the weight of his words. He watched Hisoka's face grow slowly pink, then red.

Hisoka cleared his throat. "I- I love you, too. I love you, Illumi." Illumi felt his face heating up. He covered his face with his hands.

"You- you don't have to say it if you don't mean it!"

"No, I mean it!" Hisoka blurted out. "I love you! I love you!" Hisoka repeated, and he grabbed Illumi and pulled him close.

"I love you, too."

Later that evening, Hisoka kissed Illumi goodbye before leaving.

"Don't have too much fun while I'm gone."

"If you die I'll kill you."

"I know." Hisoka kissed Illumi's forehead and placed the key to the apartment into the palm of his hand. He grabbed a small duffle bag from his room and headed out the door. Illumi stood alone in the apartment. He saw something gleam from under the couch. Crouched down to see what it was. It was one of the bloody cards Hisoka had probably thrown at Illumi during their fight earlier. It was different than the normal cards Hisoka always played with. This one was gold and smooth to the touch. It was the Ace of Hearts.

"What a fool. One of his decks must be incomplete." Illumi mumbled to himself. He thought about calling Hisoka and telling him about the forgotten card, but he decided to keep it in his pocket instead.

Illumi looked around. Small splatters of blood decorated the otherwise pure white carpet. The dining table was still disheveled from the previous night, and now there were smears of blood and other fluids on the windows.

"I'm hiring a butler," Illumi mumbled. Just then, the phone in the hallway rang. Illumi walked over to where the bright pink phone sat on a small table next to the entrance. There was no caller ID, so Illumi let it go to voicemail. The standard voicemail recording asked whoever was calling to leave a message.

"Illumi. This is Kalluto. Pick up the phone. I know you're alone." Illumi didn't hesitate to life the receiver off its holder.

"I won't bother to ask how you got this number, but I do want to know why you're calling me on Hisoka's home phone when I have a perfectly good transmitter of my own."

"I can't afford to be connected to you. I have something to tell you."

"What is it?"

"I've replaced Hisoka in Chrollo's Phantom Troupe."

Illumi paused. "Is that why you cannot be connected to me?"

"I'm supposed to be keeping an eye on Hisoka. I was very surprised to find you tagging along in all of this. They tell me Hisoka betrayed them. You were the one who helped him, weren't you?"

"I was one of several people who helped Hisoka, yes."

"What were your motives? Did he pay you?"

"No, but he will return the favor."

"It sounds to me like you have friends in low places."

"You are no different. What is your reason for joining the troupe?"

"Mother and Father want us all to be self-sufficient. They sent you off for that reason. Despite Mother and Father's hopes for you to be independent, you found a friend. A butler came to report his findings that you had moved in with a male and I intercepted the message. I decided that since not only Killua found accomplices, but also you, maybe I should give it a chance."

"You joined the Phantom Troupe to make friends?"

"In a sense, yes."

"I am rather troubled by the fact that you now associate with world famous thieves."

"Is it any worse than being a member of a family of world famous assassins?"

"We were born into the assassin life. You are choosing these friends. They don't even have a headquarters, do they?"

"No, it's too dangerous to congregate in one place too often."

Illumi sighed into the cheap plastic phone on his face. "Did you get that ridiculous spider tattoo?"

"Of course. We all have to have it. Hisoka must have one too."

"No, he doesn't it was a trick."

"What? You mean He fooled the troupe into thinking he got that tattoo? No wonder they said they wanted to watch me get the ink done! Damn. How'd he do it?"

"He's a magician. He's full of tricks."

"He's also a traitor."

"He never planned to be an actual member of the troupe. Technically, he's not a traitor."  
"He cannot be trusted. How do you expect him to return that favor you mentioned?"

"I understand his inner workings. He'll do what I want him to."

"Be careful, Illumi. Mother always said, 'When studying someone's life..."

"'...Be wary of how close you are to them. Magnifying glasses work both ways.' I know what she said, and I know what I'm doing."

"I hope for your sake you do."

"I'm your older brother. I can take care of myself."

"I know, I know."

"So you called to tell me you're part of this troupe?"

"Not just that. I wanted to warn you."

"Warn me of what?"

"You don't happen to know where Hisoka is going, do you?"

"No, he didn't tell me. Neither did Chrollo."

"Chrollo was supposed to go with him?"

"Yes, but he disappeared this morning before you showed up. Strange, isn't it?"

"I'm supposed to report to the Troupe about Hisoka's movements. When I call them after I hang up, I'm going to tell them that he's left. If you're still in his apartment when they get there, I won't be able to help you.

"Then don't tell them that he's left."

"I can't do that. They'll be looking for anything to use- any family members or names of friends. You have to be gone when they get there and any trace of you needs to be gone."

"So what, you want me to leave and let these goons come into my home and ransack the place?"

"Your home? Illumi That apartment is not your home."

"It is ever since Mother and Father kicked me out."

"Illumi are you with Hisoka? Are you- together?"

"Yes. He's more than a plaything."

"At the Hospital you said he didn't mean anything to you."

"I know what I said. I was wrong. He means a lot to me."

"…This is a problem."

"There's no problem. Tell them you searched the place and found nothing."

"They won't buy that."

"Figure something out, because I'm not going anywhere." Illumi hung up the phone. He double-checked that the door was locked and went to the kitchen to begin cleaning.

"Hisoka loves me." Illumi said to himself. "I'll stay here waiting for him. I'll wait until he calls." Illumi finished washing the dishes and went to bed. He lay down in Hisoka's bed by himself. The pillows smelled like him. He burrowed himself underneath the blankets and slowly drifted to sleep.

~Chapter 6, fin~

Sorry not sorry for the blood and stuff. Please review! It fuels me.


	7. Waiting

Illumi wandered the apartment aimlessly. No Hisoka. No fidgeted with his needles, keeping them sharp as he patiently waited for the Phantom Troupe to show up. He knew there would be consequences for not listening to his brother's warning, and he had no doubt he could handle them, but the waiting was torture. It was about two in the afternoon, and he had been awake and on edge since about 5am. Hisoka had been gone for only two days, but it felt like years.

There was nothing on TV that ever interested him. He wasn't hungry. Then again maybe he was feeling hungry, or maybe he was bored. He was definitely bored. Just a snack then. Maybe a drink. Illumi lazily peered into Hisoka's wine closet. He avoided anything remotely Spanish. A simple red wine would do fine. After carefully reading the bottle, he poured himself a glass.

He had found a trunk of VHS tapes in Hisoka's closet on a top shelf with names written on the labels. He picked oneat random and played it on the VCRset in Hisoka's room. The tape had been labelled "Alfonso" in red lettering and had a single line struckthrough the name.

"Who even uses VHS tapes anymore?" Illumi thought as he rewound the tape to the beginning and pressed play. The first three minutes of the tape was footage of a man, presumably Alfonso, fighting and killing people. The footage was obviously taken without the knowledge of anyone involved in the fight, and Illumi could only assume that Hisoka himself captured the footage in secret."What a creep." Illumi grumbled to himself. He sipped at his wine just as Hisoka appeared on screen.

Illumi marveled at how young Hisoka looked back then. His hair was shorter than it was today, and he had more lean muscle as opposed to built muscle mass. Illumi watched as this young Hisoka in the video began to fight with his opponent, who happened to be the man from earlier in the video.

Just as expected, Hisoka's agility was astounding. He appeared to fly through the air dodging attacks and making advances. Illumi noticed Hisoka's use of bungee gum as seen on the video was far inferior to his current skill, although still a force to be reckoned with.

Illumi stopped the tape and took his wine glass, now emptied, to the kitchen. He wondered what Hisoka was up to now.

His thoughts lingered on Hisoka. What was he doing. Who was he with. Whether or not Hisoka thought about him the same way. His eyes glanced over his phone with lazy eyes. He lay on the bed with his phone in hand, dialing slowly, unsure of what he would say if he answered. After a couple of rings, the phone went to voicemail. Illumi hung up and sat up on the side of the bed.

"He's probably busy..." Illumi stared at the ceiling in Hisoka's bedroom. Illumi could feel his phone vibrating on the bed next to him. He held the screen above his face and read "Hisoka" on the caller ID.

"Hello?"

"Illumi." Hisoka's voice on the other side of the line sounded tired and course, but sensual as always.

"Hey." Illumi said calmly.

"I think you just called me? I was trying to open my hotel room but the stupidkey wasn't working so I didn't get to pick up my phone, sorry."

"It's fine, I did just call you."

"Is everything okay?"

"Yes, I was just bored."

"Do you miss me already?"

"Don't flatter yourself, I'm doing just fine without you."

"Oh, right. So what have you been doing all day?"

"Well, I started watching your old matches on VHS."

"You what?"

"You looked very different when you were young."

"Illumi, you found my tapes?"

"Yes, and in regards to your fighting style, It's obvious that you've improved."

"How much have you watched?" Hisoka's voice grew slightly louder, and Illumi took notice.

"Just one match... I didn't feel like binge watching your old fights if that's what you're worried about."

"Yeah, please don't watch anymore... It's embarrassing."

"I wasn't planning on it." Illumi listened carefully to Hisoka's sigh. It sounded relieved, and as Hisoka spoke again, his voice was less tense.

"Are you sure you don't miss me?"

"I'm sure."

"Well I miss you." Hisoka's words made Illumi's heart flutter, and even though he knew why, Illumi still thought to himself that perhaps there was something wrong with his listed trusted doctors the he could make an appoinment with for a checkup,and a few seconds went by before Hisoka broke the silence.

"Illumi, are you still there?"

"Yes. I'm here."

"What's wrong?"

"Something may be wrong with my heart. I have to see a doctor soon."

"Oh really? Something wrong with your heart?"

Illumi frowned at Hisoka's question. "I don't want to say it."

"Say what?"

"That...I think maybe I do miss you. I'm incredibly lonely. I wanted to hear your voice."

"See? Was that so hard to say?"

"Yes, actually. I'm new to this."

"Just say what you want to say from now on."

"Sometimes it's difficult. For the first time I'm unsure that my actions will secure a desired outcome."

"You're afraid because you don't know what'll happen?"

"I've never had to analyze this kind of situation before."

"You don't have to analyze it. I'm in love with you, so you don't have to be afraid."

"I'm... in love with you too." Illumi listened to Hisoka's sigh of relief through the phone. Despite Hisoka's reassurance, Illumi never felt more afraid in his life.

"Say it again."

"What?" Illumi was briefly taken aback by the sudden demand, hating how much he relished being told what to do by waited patiently on the line knowing that Illumi had heard him correctly. Illumi thought his heart would spill out of his throat as he repeated, "I'm in love with you, Hisoka."

"Ah, Illumi... You have no idea what you do to my sensitive little heart." Hisoka chimed. Illumi scoffed.

"I'd hardly call anything of yours 'little'." Illumi joked dryly. Hisoka laughed boisterously into his phone.

"Illumi, if only everyone knew just how hilarious you actually are."

"You're the only one who thinks I'm funny."

"Please, you're a riot. I bet Chrollo thinks you're funny too."

"Speaking of Chrollo... any luck?"

Hisoka sighed, "No, nothing...But,I'm coming closer to finding someone who can help. I'm not going to be reachable while I'm there, but I'll call you before I go so I can talk to you."

"About how long will you be gone?"

"I don't know. Hopefully, not long."

"I'll miss you too much."

"How much do you miss me now?" Hisoka's voice reminded Illumi of a growl.

"I can't explain."

"You can't or you won't?"

"I..." Illumi could feel his face flush as he thought about just how much he missed Hisoka, how much his chest ached in the morning when he woke up and Hisoka wasn't beside him, or how horny he would get in the middle of the day, how he would spend his time with his hand down his pants thinking about Hisoka,and whether or not he dared say out loud what it felt like.

"...Illumi? You got quiet on me."

"My... chest hurts when you breathe."

"What?"

"Stop breathing!" Illumi blurted out and then hung up the phone. Hefell back onto to the bed, suddenly out of breath. As hecovered his face with his hands, he tried desperately to not exist.

"Did I just tell him to stop breathing?!" Illumi wailed. "What am I even doing?" Illumi's question hung above him in the air, unanswered. "This is Hisoka. The clown. Calm down." Illumi'sphone began ringing beside him on the bed. It was Hisoka. Illumi tried to calm himself as he answered the call.

"Yes?" Illumi answered the best he could.

"I think you hung up on me?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"I don't know."

"Are you embarrassed?"

"No. I am an assassin, a bringer of death. I do not get embarrassed."

"That may be true, but you do get flustered."

"...That is accurate. I suppose you could call what I am experiencing 'flustered'."

"It's funny. Not much makes you squirm but the moment I asked you to explain how much you miss me it became too much for you."

"Please don't ask me to try to elaborate again."

"I do love it when you say 'Please'," Hisoka chuckled. "Fine, what if I tell you what I miss about you?"

"I'd be lying if I'd saidI'm not curious." Illumi propped himself up with a pillow and listened once more to Hisoka's low chuckle. There was always something mischievous about it that made Illumi want to roll his eyes.

"Well, I miss your dark eyes the most." Illumi gasped softly, not expecting such an honest answer, and one that wasn't in any way sexual. Hisoka was always full of surprises. As Illumi silently prayed that Hisoka couldn't hear his gasp, Hisoka continued."I wish I could be the target of those unforgiving black poolsright now. And oh my goodness, Illumi those legs of yours... Boy, you've got legs for days." Illumi couldn't help but laugh at Hisoka's statement. There was the Hisoka Illumi was familiar with.

"You know I've never met anyone with a booty like yours." The heartfelt moment was gone, and Illumi couldn't help but roll his eyes and sigh.

"Hisoka, please, your butt is way bigger than mine."

"No! That's the thing! Your butt is different; Its got that high and firm look to it!"

"I wouldn't know. I'm not a booty connoisseur like you."

"Illumi, babe, you've got a fine butt."

"I'm not a babe."

"Oh, but youare. When I met you for the first time, I thought about how delicious you looked."

"Am I a person or a cupcake?"

"You seemed so cold at first I thought you weren't interested.. But I kept seeing slight instances of warmth underneath that pretty cold exterior of yours."

"Hisoka..."

"Yes?"

"How exactly did we get here?"

Hisoka paused at Illumi's sudden question. "You pride yourself in properness and politeness. You're a polished and well-oiled killing machine. Taking life is a easy as breathing to you. The way you move when you kill, no, when you assassinate someone, it's like you don't see the art in it. You're so different than me in that aspect. You don't use flare or flamboyance. It interested on my radar for a long time before you were ever my friend. "

"On your radar?"

"You know I'm always looking for people worthy to fight. The thing about you, is, I've never seen you at your full power. To this day, I'm not entirley sure I could kill you. It frustrates me to no end. I know you held your punches when we fought before I left."

"Maybe I did."

"Why?"  
"I struggle with that question myself."

Hisoka smiled to himself as he spoke. "Is it because when you fight with me it turns you on?"

Illumi frowned. "I didn't want to acknowledge that you caused a physical reaction in mybody, but I'm guessing you noticed it far before I did." Illumi couldn't believe the level of honesty at which he spoke.

"You're right, I noticed it. I've never met anyone as frightening as you."

"Frightening?"

"You're different. You're smart. You don't give away your full power and you're the same way with your emotions. You've got a calm exterior, but Isee something wildunderneath. I see glimpses of your temper. Like I said before, when you assassinate someone, you don't see the art in it. I think it's because that person is weaker than you. You like being superior, but you don't like being bored. I think when you first realized that I was possibly dangerous, you made a quick move to be my associate. You probably thought I'd be handy to keep around. You never wanted me as a friend. You wanted a give and take relationship."

"That's correct. I never thought it'd turn into this, though."

"I'm just as surprised as you are."

"Even knowing all this, you still made advances towards me?"

"I never thought you'd actually be turned on."

Illumi paused in thought for a moment, remembering all the times Hisoka got too close for comfort. Illumi used to hate the way his body would always want to give in. The way Hisoka would press himself up against Illumi always tempted him. Before he could really think, Illumi spoke.

"I want your body against mine." Illumi didn't register the boldness of his statement. He simply listened calmly at Hisoka's cough.

"Illumi, darling, you need to be more careful of what you say to me."

"And what if I don't want to be careful?" the words spilled out of Illumi's mouth before he realized he was saying them.

"You'll regret it," Hisoka said in a low husky voice.

Illumi laughed, "You're not here to follow through with that threat, Hisoka. I can say or do anything I want."

"You shouldn't."

"Oh, and what are you going to do about it, hm? Punish me? From your hotel room?"

"Illumi, you brat. You just don't know, do you? The thingsI'll make you say and do..." Hisoka's inhale was strong but his exhale was shaky and fragile as he closed his eyes to imagine.

"Until you come home to me I can do whatever I want." Illumi bit his lip and listened to Hisoka's tortured breaths.

"Illumi I want to see you right now."

"Not a chance."

"Come on, just one picture."

"You know why I can't."

"Fine... then since I can't see you; What are you wearing right now?"

"I.. I'm just wearing my sweatpants and a purple crop?" Illumi said hesitantly.

"Hm. Tacky. Take it off."

"You're one to call my clothes tacky."

"Just do it."

"Whatever. Fine." Hisoka listened in silence to the gentle rustle of fabric as Illumi stripped.

"Your turn."

"What?"

"I said, your turn. Whatever you're wearing is bound to be tacky so take it off."

"Oh, I uh. I'm not wearing anything."

"….At all?"

"No I've been naked this whole time."

"...Of course you've been."

"Does that bother you?"

"No, in fact I'm not the least bit surprised. You're a slut."

"Oh, Illumi, darling. Of the two of us, you're the slutty one. The way you talk to me you're practically begging me to fuck you senseless."

"Hah. As if I'd beg you. You always press yourself up on me like the whore you are."

"Don't pretend like you don't like it. I know exactly how hard you get when I press against you like I do."

"You can grind against me all you want and I'd still wouldn't beg." Illumi kept his voice confident, even knowing on the inside how easily Hisoka could make him beg. This game amusedIllumi.

"That's funny, because I know I'm not the only one who does all the grinding. I notice you pushing back againstme. Every time."

"And that somehow makes me more of a slut? When I do exactly what you do to me?"

"No, what makes you more of a slut is how you fight it because you know it makes me want you more. It's like you're taunting me with how much you want me and how much you're not willing to let me have you. Your pride is very tempting, Illumi. It makes me want that perfect assassin undone and unravelled beneath me. That's what makes you a slut."

"Hm. Sounds to me like you just really want me."

"Well, you'renot wrong."

"I want you too." Illumi smiled as his words left his mouth. He could hear Hisoka chuckle at his confession.

"You know exactly what you're doing to me, don't you?" Hisoka asked playfully.

"Yes, and I think it's fun." Hisoka shuddered at the assassin's words

"You're gonna get it when I get home, Illumi." Hisoka threatened.

"Good. My body aches for it."

"Oh? Have you been playing with yourself while I'm gone?"

"Not yet."

"Well you should... in fact, why don't you touch yourself right now? Give me something to listen to."

"Only if I get to hear you, too."

"Of course."

Illumi ran his hand down his chest towards his abdomen and down to his waistline, calmly listening to Hisoka's gentle chuckles.

"Illumi, touch yourself like I would touch you if I was there right now." The words struck something inside Illumi, sending a shiver down his spine as he imagined the vision of gold eyes looking up at him while strong hands groped and caressed his body. Illumi twitched at the thought before letting his hand wrap around his hardening dick. He couldn't help but close his eyes and imagine Hisoka there, in between his legs with the same hungry eyes he always had.

"Hisoka..." Illumi seemed to not even have to try to speak his lover's name now. It was more like an exhale the way it felt so natural.

"Illumi, I need you so bad right now," said Hisoka, who lay in his bed with half-lidded eyes as he pressed the phone close to his ear to take in all the sounds coming through.

Illumibithis lip as he stroked himself slowly, feeling it grow harder in his hand. "I need you too.." Illumi rolled his thumb around his tip, swirling the precum around. "Hisoka..." Illumi whispered again.

"Illumi, let me hear you." Hisoka's panting indicated to Illumi that whatever he was doing seemed to be working. Illumi's face felt hot and his body was flush with color. Illumi didn't hesitate to moan out Hisoka's name repeatedly as he moved faster. Hisoka's soft grunts pushed Illumi further into madness.

"Illumi..." Hisoka groaned, "play with that pretty little ass of yours for me."

"Mmf..." Illumi bit his lip to stifle a moan before licking his fingers and obeying Hisoka's request. As he pressed his middle finger into himself he listened to Hisoka's feverish breathing. "...Ah! hnn.."

"Illumi... I can only imagine how sinful you probably look right now." Hisoka's voice was almost tangible in the way it seemed to caress Illumi's body, sending tiny waves of shivers through him.

"Hisoka, I want to hear you more." Illumi didn't recognize his own voice, but he didn't care. He didn't care anymore about what he was saying, as long as he was saying it to Hisoka.

"Illumi, I- Ah!" Hisoka's voice was low when he spoke and high when he moaned. Illumi longed to see the face he knew Hisoka was making. "I'm going to fuck you so hard when I get home..." Hisoka spoke between harsh breaths that drove Illumi wild.

"Hisoka... would it be okay if I try riding you when you get back?" Illumi asked sweetly.

Hisoka shuddered before answering.

"I reallythought you'd never ask."

"I take that as a yes?"

"Yeah. Hah... ah..." Hisoka's vocalizations grew louder over the phone. "Just imagining it... unf."

"I can't wait to feel you inside me again." Illumi's body was rushing with blood, and he could feel his neediness pulsating through him urgently. He wanted Hisoka right then and there.

"Illumi..." Hisoka seemed to be on the edge. Illumi allowed himself the small delight that Hisoka was the one now calling his name out.

"You fill me up so good with that huge dick of yours." Illumi's low voice would prove to haunt Hisoka for days.  
"Illumi I miss your tight ass oh god!"

Illumi curled his finger upwards as he stroked himself, allowing him to be pushed further towards the edge as he felt the sensation. He moaned as he did, and Hisoka responded with a moan of his own.

"Illumi, put another finger in for me." Hisoka begged. Illumi obliged without a word, but Hisoka could tell be the slight grunting coming from his phone that he had done as was asked of him.

"That's a good boy..."

"Shut... up.." Illumi could barely speak as his head began to feel light. He wiggled his fingers inside himself, feeling the heat build as he did.

"Fuck, Illumi what I would give to see you right now." Hisoka imagined Illumi's skin, pink flush against his pale porcelain color. Eyelids half open, the assassin previously too cold to love anyone now face upon his bed with his hand two fingers deep in his ass because he, Hisoka the magician, asked him to. What a lovely image. Hisoka smiled a devilish grin at the thought. It was his greatest magic trick yet.

"…Unng!" Illumi moaned out as he let himself slip further and further into a world of pleasure. Any more of this and he would soon not be able to form coherent sentences. "Hisoka, this is nothing compared to how you feel inside me.."

Hisoka groaned. "Fuck, you don't know what you do to me, Illumi."

"What, do I make you hard? I've already known that."

"Illumi, I want to tear you to pieces."

"You can try if you want to."

"Fuck." Hisoka felt as if he'd burst right out of his skin as he soaked in Illumi's challenging words.

"I mean, really. Try. I want you to tear me up. Rip me to shreds. If you can, that is."

"Illumi, I don't think you know what you're asking for."

"Oh, but I do.." Illumi closed his eyes and licked his lips as he pressed his fingers further into himself and moaned."I want you to fuck me senseless.I want you to dig into me with your nails and bite at my skin so hard like I know you want to.I want you to make my body hurt with how good it feels.I want you to unleash everything you've ever held back from me."

"Fuck," Hisoka's curse reverberated over the phone. His motions became fast as he brought himself closer to the edge. Illumi stroked himself faster and curled his fingers to just the right spot and he let out a whimper.

"Hisoka..." Illumi mumbled.

"Fuck."

"Tell me you want me.."

"I want you, Illumi.."

"Nng.. Hisoka, I'm so hard right now..."

"I am too. Are you fingering yourself like I told you?"

"I am... Hisoka... you too... ah!" Illumi tried and failed to stifle a moan.

"You are truly sinful, Illumi..." Hisoka obliged, licking his index and middle fingers before slowly sliding them into himself. He worried that he would be the first to come if Illumi continued to speak the way he was. "Only you can ask me to do this."

"Hisoka, it feels so good.."

"Are you getting close?" Hisoka waited for a response, but all Illumi could vocalize were squirmish and feverish yelps.

"Oh, god." Hisoka whispered. He stroked himself to the pace of Illumi's sounds, silently cursing the distance between them.

"I want you to come for me, Illumi."

"Nn... Ah! Ahhhh!" Illumi's moans drowned out the garbled words he tried to form.

Hisoka let his phone drop away from his faceas he moved faster. He bit his lip and closed his eyes, imagining Illumi's devilishly innocent stare. His fingers pressed against just the right spot as he threw his head back as hiships bucked and his body shivered. He panted out a number of obscenities as the pleasure came over him. When he was done, heslowly opened his eyes.

He picked up the phone that lay next to him on his pillow. He sighed as he looked at the ceiling and spoke roughly.

"You there?"

"Yeah." Illumi's voice was almost a sigh. He pulled his fingers slowly out of himself and got up to clean himself off.

"Illumi."

"Hm?"

"From now on, please wait for me before you touch yourself again. I want to hear you every time."

"Only if you do the same."

"I promise."

"Then, I promise too."

….

…

Later that evening, after talking with Hisoka for another three hours, Illumi finally was able to hang up the phone and take a shower. His hair was still wet as he prepared dinner for himself. His thoughts wondered.

Chrollo's disappearance didn't make sense. Illumi thought to himself.

"Chrollo was gone the moment Hisoka and Iwere too incapacitated to notice. Either Chrollo left of his own volition, or someone was waiting for the right moment to act. Kalluto already admitted to be watching Hisoka, but he would not have shown himself had he been involved... Chrollo could have decided to just leave, but considering he has no Nen, he would have absolutley no way to protect himself... There's also the manner in which his things were laid out at the hospital. There was no way he would have just left his magazine there. He loves trash literature. So then who else besides the troupe would want Chrollo? That yellow-haired boy who travels with Killua... He was the one responsible for Chrollo's lost Nen in the first place."

"Talking to yourself, are we?" The voice came from behind Illumi, and although he knew instantly who it was, Illumi could not believe it.

"...Father?"

"You seem preoccupied with your friend's disappearance."

"He's a former client. You know him well."

"Yes, Chrollo Lucilfer. The head of the Phantom Troupe. I hear he's not doing so well for himself these days."

"What are you doing here?"

"You're not even going to invite your own father to your new apartment?"

"It's not my apartment.. It's-"

"You're boyfriend's." Silva interrupted.

"Hisoka isn't really... we..."

"Even if you two don't have a name for it, the truth remains, doesn't it? He's your lover." Silva squinted his eyes and bore down his stare at Illumi, and feeling the strength of it, Illumicouldn't help but look away.

"Father," Illumi spoke in almost a whisper, but the weight in his throat seemed to dissipate as he spoke. He looked up to meet Silva's merciless stare, "for the first time... I think you were wrong about what can or cannot bring us happiness. I am... happy, and it didn't come from killing." Illumi could hardly believe what he was saying. The words fell out of his mouth before he could really register what they meant. Silva's face was unflinching and unforgiving.

"I let you out of our house to better yourself as an assassin. I wanted you to become independent. I see now that was a mistake. I have wronged you. By forcing you out I deprived you of something. I'm here to bring you back."

"Kalluto must have told you I was here."

"He gave your mother the report. Your mother... she nearly went through the roof when she heard what you've been up to. Here you are, living with a man who isn't family and isn't even an assassin. You've been screwing around not accepting much work if at all and the press- The press had your picture before Kalluto intercepted it! Now I'm hearing that your lover boy isn't even here and yet you stay in this apartment even though you know for a fact that Chrollo's troupe will be here. These are all decisions that will not only get you killed, but can hurt the family too."

"So I'm guessing you know that Kalluto is in the Phantom Troupe."

"Don't change the subject."

"I wasn't."

Silva exhaled loudly through his nostrils. "You forget that even outside of the mansion, your actions reflect the Zoldyck family. The press almost had your photo, Illumi! A disgusting one at that."

"The press was intercepted and it won't happen again."

"I'll make sure it doesn't happen again because you're not seeing him anymore."

"You can't do that, I'm staying here."

"And what would I tell your mother? That you've chosen that clown who's biggest achievement is a floor in heaven's arena over the confidentiality of our family?"

"He's not just a clown."

"That's not the issue, Illumi!" Silva's fist pounded the wall next to him, pushing through the sheetrock. Illumi looked at his father in silence. Silva sighed, calming himself.

"Illumi, come back to the mansion. We'll make things right."

"No. I-"

"No? Excuse me?"

"I'm not leaving."

"The troupe is coming here."

"I can handle them."

"That'd be a bad move for business on our part, Illumi. People like them keep us busy. If you kill them-"

"People like them also happen to be Chrollo's friends. They're probably more concerned than I am about the whereabouts of Chrollo Lucifer."

"And do you think they'll just talk with you? That lover boy of yours is their enemy."

"Well, whether they like it or not Hisoka and I were the last to see him. They'll have to talk to me."

"Illumi answer something for me."

"What?"

"Why didn't you kill Hisoka the moment you suspected you might have feelings for him? You know we do not fraternize with weaklings."

"He is not weak, and he interested me. I thought it would prove beneficial to keep him around."

"Beneficial? If what I've heard is true you have even helped him in the past for no pay by disguising yourself as him. Am I wrong?"

"That is true."

"And what did you get out of that? Hm? One of the first things we teach you kids is NEVER accept sexual favors as a means of payment!"

"What? God, no! I did not receive any sexual favor in return. I planned to use him in the future. I still do."

"So what, you're using him?

"Well, yeah. But it's not justthat."

"You do realize that by using him you put the rest of us at risk?"

"He could still prove beneficial to not just me, but to all of us, okay? He's strong. You don't know because you haven't seen him, but he is. I'm not even sure I could kill him. BUT, that's not the point. I love him. I love staying with him and doing things for him because I love him."

"I see."

"I'm not going back with you."

"No need. I understand perfectly." Silva turned about-face and headed for the door.

"Illumi," Silva called out just before leaving.

"A person like Hisoka will be the death of you if you don't kill him first. You have to know that."

"I do." Illumi answered firmly. "I don't mind."

Silva scoffed as he left the apartment.

"...So the troupe is finally coming." Illumi thought to himself. He heard a knock on the door. "Finally. I almost died of waiting."

~Chapter 7, fin~

I'vebeen sitting on this chapter since before November oh goodness. That was way too long. Sorry loves, I'll be better i promise 3


	8. Emotions are Not for Assassins

Chapter 8: Emotions are Not for Assassins

"The name." Hisoka smirked, despite his frustration. Machi pulled out a crumply folded piece of paper from her satchel and tossed it at Hisoka.

"Here." She grunted. Hisoka caught it with ease and smiled. He unfolded it to read the name to himself.

"Okay then. I'll find him."

"You better. Don't forget we know about your little pet." Machi managed to contain her smugness as she spoke.

"First of all, he's not a pet. Secondly, you sound a tad jealous, Machi. Are you disapointed that I didn't take you as my lover?" Hisoka's hand was on his hip and his tone seemed flirtatious, but Machi knew the underlying tone of rage in his smile. They both knew Hisoka could kill her if he wanted to, but that he wouldn't.

"I'd rather die first." Machi retorted as she rolled her eyes.

"That can be arranged." Hisoka held up a card jokingly.

"Just get it done. And don't go losing a limb. I don't want to have to patch you up."

"I wouldn't dream of it." Hisoka flipped his finger and the card disappeared as if by magic.

Machi nodded before she turned away and left Hisoka standing at the edge of the dock, aura beaming with bloodlust. Hisoka threw a card into the wood of the dock with a snarl. He breathed and calmed himself, remembering it was Illumi they were talking about. Even if the troupe tried, Kalluto probably never would let them do anything to hurt Illumi. Probably. But he hated that they even had the audacity to threaten him. He wanted to fight Chrollo, sure, but right now as he watched Machi walk away with not so much as a glance backwards, he wanted blood. The troupe's blood. He would have it. Eventually. He sighed as he looked at the peice of paper with the name of the exorcist scrawled on it.

"Abengane..." Hisoka read the name aloud to himself. "Fighting Chrollo at his full power will be worth the trouble. Or at least it better be."

"They're not coming, are they?" Illumi spoke into the receiver of the phone that sat in the hallway of the apartment that had long become his self-inflicted prison. He waited for a response from the other end with anger tensing up the muscles in his face.

"Illumi, I spoke with father and-"

"Don't change the subject," Illumi said calmly, "Why aren't they coming?"  
"You haven't left that apartment in almost a week."

"Tell me, Kalluto."

Kalluto hesitated before speaking softly. "You already know why they aren't coming." Illumi could feel his heart racing as the words fell on his ears.

"So... They already know where Hisoka is, then."

"Yes. He isn't exactly stealthy. That man is rather flamboyant and makes himself known wherever he goes."

"Liar. You told them where he was going, didn't you?"

"You really don't know anything. What else am I supposed to do? Let you mope around that apartment until they come for you?"

"I could have handled them."

"Not all at once, you couldn't."

"You don't know that."

"Well I wasn't about to take that chance. You're family."

"You sold him out! If you think I can't handle them all at once then why would you set them on Hisoka?!"

"That clown isn't family!"  
"He is to me!"

Kalluto's audible gasp startled Illumi.

"What did you just say, Illumi?"

"Hisoka... is family to me." Illumi repeated.

"Illumi. Illumi Zoldyck. That's who you are. Have you forgotten? You're an elite assassin and eldest son of the Zoldyck family. Hisoka Is not your family. He's just some guy you've been living with for a while. I don't care how good you got it with him, Illumi... Hisoka is not your family."

"You don't know him like I do."

"Oh, is that what you think? Do you think you're special to him?"

"I know I am."

"And what if he thought you were weaker than you were?"

"What?"

"What if Hisoka believed you lost your nen, like Chrollo?"

"First, that won't happen. Even if it did, he'd still love me."

"Would he stick around? Or would all the fun go away, just like it did for Chrollo?"

"Shut up, he's not- he's not... That's not the only thing that's important to him!"

"You don't sound very convincing."

"He would still care about me! He'd probably even try to help me find how to get my nen back."

"Just like he's doing now for Chrollo?"

"Exactly!"

"I've been meaning to ask you this, but... what exactly is going to happen to you two when Chrollo is at full power again?" Illumi kept quiet as Kalluto continued. "He's going to want to fight him, is that right?"

"That's his plan, yes."

"Does it not bother you that he has no regard for your feelings over his life?"

"Hisoka is the way he is.."

"You mean self-serving and completely lacking any kind of morality."

"The same could be said for me."

"Oh, Illumi. Don't be so harsh on yourself. You have morals, despite how twisted they may be you have morals. Tell me, Illumi. What's the worst sin someone can commit?"

"Killing a family member. Right under that would be abandoning a comrade."

"You didn't even hesitate to answer."

"What does that prove?"

"You said he's like your family, right? And you got upset at me for selling him out because you worry for his safety, but it seems to me that he doesn't give a damn about his own safety. He doesn't mind the risk of dying as long as he gets the thrill of the fight. But you worry for him. What would you do if Killua wanted to get into a fight that he might die in?"

Illumi couldn't help but think about the needle he stuck inside Killua's forehead to prevent exactly that kind of situation; the needle that would convince Killua to run away from a fight if he had any doubt that he wouldn't be able to beat an opponent.

"I would... I would do something to stop him."

"So are you going to stop Hisoka from fighting Chrollo, even though he's working so hard right now to make that dream a reality? A dream that he's willing to take so much time away from you to achieve?"

"I've already asked him about it... He's pretty adamant about it."

"So he doesn't care about what will happen to you in the case that he loses?"

"He won't lose."

"But what if he does? You'll be alone, right? Doesn't he care how his death will affect you?"

"We haven't talked about it, but I know I can't stop him from achieving what he wants. He's wanted to fight Chrollo for a long time now."

"And you're just okay with that?"

"He's okay with how I am, so why wouldn't I be okay with how he is?"

"Because Hisoka is selfish and has no concept of family, Illumi. Trust me when I tell you, he doesn't have the capacity to love you, and he would probably abandon you given the chance."

Illumi paused for a moment, thinking it over. "In battle, if he came across an opponent strong enough to kill him, he'd fight. He'd never run. He is incapable of abandoning me."

"I'm not just talking about in a fight, Illumi. What if he betrays you, or if you..." Kalluto trailed off and sighed. "Look, Illumi. There are more sins than the ones that someone can commit during battle. Trust me, you don't want to do this."

"Trust you? After you sold Hisoka out? No."

"Are you that blind, Illumi? This goes against everything we've been taught!"

"If you don't have any further information for me, this conversation has become meaningless."

"W-wait, wait. Before you go. How about a job?"

"A job?"

"Yes. I would have taken it myself but the troupe is on the move and I have to meet them."

"What if I don't want to?"

"Well then the family loses out on a job. Just do it Illu. You need to get out of that apartment even if its for just a little bit."

There was silence on the line as Illumi thought to himself. The money wouldn't hurt, and he had nothing better to do.

"Okay, I'll do it."

"Great. I'll send you the files now. Talk to you soon."

"Bye."

"Bye."

Illumi placed the phone back on it's hook gently. There was a buzz in his pocket from his family's transmitter. He reviewed the file of his target. Ha glanced over her name, 'Nadya M.' was the only information on her name. She was a prolific business woman who was staying in a hotel nearby. She had made one too many enemies while gambling in Heaven's arena. What a petty reason to have someone killed. He didn't care, really, but it amused him. There was basic information on where she was staying in the city. The file was small, but he never really cared for too much information anyway.

The hotel was just a few blocks south. He could finish the job and be back within the hour. He sighed as he readied his needles. He prepared himself mentally for the kill. Like riding a bike, after so many years it came so naturally to him he barely registered that he was doing it. No sane person would be able to so easily come to terms with the fact that they planned to take someone's life, but he'd done it so many times now it was child's play. It was just business, nothing personal.

Illumi crossed his arms as he waited for the elevator. This would be his first job since moving in with Hisoka. He didn't have a reason for not taking any work, he just figured his family could take care of it. The elevator dinged and the doors slid open. He stepped in and pressed the key for the ground floor. He thought about his time with Hisoka as he leaned his back against the wall behind him.

"...Come to think of it, I haven't seen Hisoka leave to do any fighting in Heaven's arena since I moved in.." Illumi mumbled his thoughts aloud to himself. It had only been about a month, but considering how bloodthirsty the both of them were, no wonder they ended up fucking. Hisoka was probably dying from the tension, and whether Illumi liked it or not, he had to admit he had a lot of pent up energy when Hisoka finally made his move. He wanted to let his thoughts linger on the memory of each other's desperation, but the elevator dinged and the doors slid open. Illumi walked out into the small lobby and made his way out the door. He needed to focus on getting to his target. Nadya would be in a meeting right now according to the schedule Kalluto sent. She'd be returning home within the next half hour. If he wanted to finish this quickly, he'd need to get to her house before she did. No problem.

He slinked into an alleyway and made his way through the darkness, turning and moving with ease. He knew the alleys like an old friend no matter where in the world he was, he could always count on the shadows. He approached the building and quickly noted a tenant entered a keycard into a slot next to the entrance. The street had too much foot traffic for him to discreetly break the security measure. He waited for an opportunity. Through the glass in the lobby, he could see someone preparing to walk out. He paced himself perfectly to enter right as the door opened. He held the door for the elderly man as he left. The man thanked him, and Illumi remained silent as he approached the elevators. Another keycard slot. Security was becoming more annoying. He moved past the elevators and carefully surveyed the area. He turned a corner to find a stairway entrance with another slot. What a nuisance.

"Excuse me sir, may I help you? You seem to be lost," said a voice from behind Illumi.

"Actually, miss, if you don't mind..." Illumi quickly turned around and struck a needle into the skull of the woman in front of him. Poor thing seemed to have worked in reception. Whatever the case, she worked for Illumi now.

"I'll need access to the penthouse." Illumi commanded. She nodded, and turned about-face. Illumi followed her as she walked to the counter and grabbed a keycard before heading ober to the elevators. One quick swipe and the elevator doors opened, allowing them to step in. It was when she turned to face the elevator doors that Illumi noticed her forehead was bleeding from the hole where the needle had pierced her. Unfortunately for her, the needle had gone in too deep. Extracting it would certainly kill her. Illumi cared not that she would die, but he dreaded the thought of the bloody mess it would be to get his needle back. The elevators slid open and the receptionist stepped out. Illumi followed her down the corridor to the room where his target would be reaching soon. The girl slid her key card into the slot, and after a small beep the lock clicked open and the receptionist opened the door. The two of them stood in the hallway.

"Ladies, first." Illumi gestured for her to step inside. He wouldn't be able to leave her outside in the hallway for room service to find. She stepped in first, and Illumi closed the door behind them. He noted that normally he would not interact with his victims the way he was doing now. Maybe Kalluto was right and he needed to get out more.

The room was spacious and luxurious, but the entryway was fairly narrow. It wasn't a big deal, but if he wanted to do this quietly and without any screaming, he'd just have to wait until she walked into the living area. He quickly swept through the suite, checking behind all doors and curtains for signs of a bug or wire. The room was clean. The target's suitcase lay on the hotel bed opened and half empty.

"Hand me your key card." Illumi held out his hand, and the receptionist handed it over without hesitation.

"I should be able to find my way out of here. I have no use for you alive now." The receptionist nodded, and reached for the needle.

"Wait." Illumi spoke softly, and the receptionist stopped her hand, waiting for another command.

"On the couch." Illumi stepped aside to let her walk to the couch by the coffee table.

"Sit." He ordered. She sat down and looked at him with soulless eyes.

"You may continue." Again, the receptionist reached for the needle, this time grasping it firmly and pulling it out slowly. Blood from her forehead poured out onto her face. The Nen in the needle no longer controlled her now lifeless body, and she fell to the couch with a soft whump. Illumi watched as her blood soaked the couch fabric beneath her. Illumi smiled to himself as he thought about how Hisoka might have got after him for ruining a perfectly good couch. The receptionist's body was perfectly visible from the entryway, but it was dark enough to just see that someone was laying on the couch. Perfect.

Illumi could hear the sound of a key card entering the slot. He moved quickly to lean against a wall hidden from the entryway. He could hear the door open, and the rustle of movement. He calmed his breathing, and he could hear a gasp.

"Excuse me? Miss? Are... Are you okay?"

Just as Illumi expected, Nadya saw the slumped over person on the couch in the hotel outfit and tried to call out to the receptionist. Illumi waited as his target approached.

"Miss? H-hello?" The target had walked into the living area to inspect the receptionist. Illumi noted Nadya's elegant, backless dress. It would be a shame to bloody such a garment. Just as she turned the face of the receptionist over and realized she was dead, Illumi had struck several needles into the back of her throat. He could tell they went clear through the front of her neck, as she was unable to scream. She fell to the floor to the side of the receptionist, and her mouth lay wide open, spewing blood from her lips as she tried desperately to say something. Her gurgled words were unintelligible. Her eyes had met Illumi's, and her hand reached out to grab him, but he was too far away. She died on the floor, still bleeding. Illumi checked her pulse to be sure, and once he confirmed her death, he dialed Kalluto on his transmitter and leaned against the doorframe.

"Hello?" Kalluto answered after the second ring.

"Kalluto. It's done."

"Nadya is dead?"

"Yes."

"You killed her?" Kalluto asked.

"Yes...?" Illumi answered unsurely at the question.

"Good. And the boy?"

"The... boy?" Just as Illumi asked his question, he turned around and peered into the entryway to see a small boy, barely older than a toddler, dressed in a tiny suit. His eyes were wide with wonder, but his face showed fear. His small body trembled with his back to the door. Illumi realized now that his target was probably trying to beg Illumi not to kill her son with her last breath. He also realized that the boy had witnessed everything.

"Her son. He should have been with her."

"I didn't see anything in the files about a son."

"Oh. Really? My bad. In any case, was he not with her?"

"I'm looking right at him."

"Oh, good. Take care of him, too."

Illumi breathed as he looked at the small trembling child in front of him. He almost reminded him of Killlua. The way his eyes seemed to be nearly on the brink of tears, but he fought them back. Killua had done the same when Illumi had started training him. He remembered Killua's face clearly. Killua's perfect blue eyes, even though this boy's eyes were a golden yellow. This moment would have lasted, and perhaps Illumi would have smiled upon such memories if he had time to continue dwelling on them, but the boy began to open his mouth as if to cry or scream. Illumi's needles struck the boy in the chest, stopping his heart instantly. He died before he could make a single noise.

"It's done."

"Excellent. Catch you later."

"Goodbye."

Illumi hung up his call with Kalluto and wondered when it was that he began to answer to his little brother.

"You really are a ruthless one, Illumi." Said a voice from behind. Illumi had gotten used to his family members coming to pay him a visit, but he was positive there was no one else in the suite except him and the heap of bodies. He turned to face whoever was behind him, but to his relief, the voice came from the hotel phone on the coffee table.

"I really never imagined I'd be graced with your presence so far outside the mansion, mother, but hearing your voice made me believe that just for a second you would come out all this way. Of course, I should have expected nothing more than a phone call."

"I got word that you were being sloppy. I must say, neglecting to secure the phone lines before performing an assassination?" She made a clicking noise with her tongue in disappointment. "Illumi, you know better than that. What if the room was tapped?"

"Or what if my mother was listening in the whole time?"

"Exactly."

Illumi sighed and stepped over the bodies to sit on the couch in front of the phone. "You know I'm kind of tired of you all butting in to lecture me."

"What? You don't miss your dear mother, Illu~?"

"Not really, no. It kinda feels like some terrible author in control of my life is torturing me by making you all torment me like some kind of ghost from the past."

"That hurts, Illu."

"Oh? Does it hurt as much as being kicked out by your parents? Oh wait, you probably wouldn't know what that feels like, hmm? Just me then?"

"Illumi, you weren't this upset when you left. I thought you understood why we had to let you out of the mansion for a while."

"What was it? To test me? Well what's the verdict? I've apparently been fucking up enough for you all to realize I'm not ready to be on my own."

"Watch your mouth!" Kikyo's shrill voice stung Illumi like no other. He could hear her breathe harshly as she prepared to answer in a calmer tone. "In short, yes. It was a test. We wanted you to be on your own and see how you would thrive, but.."

"But I made friends."

"You and Killua do everything in your power to disobey our teachings! The first thing you did since leaving was move straight to the city with that man!"

"Does father know you're contacting me?"

"Don't change the subject."

Illumi closed his mouth and held his tongue.

"Illu, I just wanted to see your potential as one of the greatest assassins this family has ever seen."

"That's a lie. Killua is the heir. He's already set to be greater than myself."

"But Illumi! Killua was showing so little promise because of that friend and-"

"He'll abandon Gon one day. He'll betray him. It's in his nature. When he does, he'll realize who he is and come back."

"And what about you?"

"What about me?"

"Will you betray that man?"

"That man is Hisoka, and no I won't betray him."

"What makes you so sure?"

"I'm in love with him."

"Is that what you believe?"

"I don't just believe it. It's the truth."

"So you move in with this guy and suddenly you're in love with him?"

"He's been my friend for longer than that, but moving in with him just accelerated things."

"You think that because you think you love him that you'll never betray him?"

"I don't need another reason."

"The human heart is fickle, Illumi. This is the first person you've ever shown affection for. Trust me when I say that you're moving too fast and you're not looking out for yourself"

"It's up to me to decide how fast I want to move with him."

"Give it time, Illumi. You'll come to see that you're an assassin, and Assassins don't have room in their lives for love."

"So you don't love father?"

"It's different between your father and I, you know that. Your father was the heir to the Zoldyck family. He needed a wife. He understands his duty and I understood mine. My family was very happy to have me marry your father. They couldn't have been prouder."

"And what would I do to make you proud of me?"

"You'd understand your role in this family, Illumi. Killua must be protected. I don't know what you think you did to protect him, but if you're not with him, you fail him. If you fail him, you fail us."

"So did you think that by kicking me out, I would have more freedom to watch over Killua?"

"Illu, we thought you would understand."

"You want me to make the family proud while still being an outsider."

"You're not an outsider, Illu! In fact, I've wanted you to come home since the day you left!"

"Then why is this the first phone call I get from you?"

"Things have been difficult. Your father instructed us not to contact you unless an emergency occurred. He wanted to truly see how solitude would affect you."

"So I have effectively failed his test."

"Yes, dear. Now, I need you to come home."

Illumi realized the weight of his options. His father had offered him before the chance to come home, but hearing it from his mother was different somehow.

"I've already come to the conclusion that Hisoka will never abandon me."

"But will you abandon Hisoka?"

"What? No,"

"You're an assassin, Illumi."

"And?"

"Don't sass me." Illumi stayed quiet. "You must always think of your own self preservation and the protection of our family. You're not even looking after Killua anymore."

"Don't worry about Killua."

"How can I not worry about Killua? You haven't been watching him!"

"I'm always watching him, mother. Even now, I'm in his head, making sure he doesn't do anything dangerous. In time, he will betray that friend of his and come back to you."

"What exactly do you mean you're in his head?"

"I mean I'm in his head. Via one of my needles. Every time he encounters an opponent that he Isn't sure he can beat, he'll run away.

"And when will you come back to us?"

"I'll send you a postcard every once in awhile."

"Illumi, please!"

"What?"

"You know I'm right. You've only been with that man for at most a month and a half and you think you know him. Even you're not that dumb."

"I'll decide how dumb I want to be."

"Illumi, I promise you he won't want to stick around after this."

"After what?"

"After what you've done."

"And what is it exactly that I've done?"

"Didn't you know? You just carried out an assassination on Hisoka's only known family."

"What do you mean I-" Illumi grew quiet as he remembered the boy's eyes. "..No." Illumi quickly got up and picked Nadya's handbag off the floor. He opened it and spilled it's contents on the floor. Currency from several different countries. Lipstick. Tiny handgun. ID. Illumi squinted at the small card and read the name. "Nadya Morow."

"Illumi, darling, I'm suprised you didn't know about Hisoka's-"

"SHut up!" Illumi growled at the phone. "There wasn't any of that information in the file! Kalluto just... Kalluto. That little shit is gonna pay!"

"Why would you be cross with Kalluto? We assumed since you and Hisoka were so close you would have already known about Hisoka's family."

"But Kalluto- wait. What do you mean 'We'?" Illumi dropped the ID as the realization sunk in.

"You ordered this?"

"Son, you had gotten too attached."

"You... you set me up! All of you!"

"No, Illumi. You could have avoided this."

"Don't fucking lie to me!" Illumi could feel everything racing. His heart. His thoughts. His trembling body turned to face the body of the child he killed. Kikyo's voice drowning in and out of his ability to understand. "If you had just come home..." His mother's voice cooed, "none of this would have had to happen." The boy's eyes were long void of any life, but Illumi could still see the all too familiar gold. Everything was too similar. His nose. His cheeks. Even his ears. Exactly the same. "Illumi, talk to me."

"What have I done?" Illumi could feel himself shaking and his face burning. "What is this feeling?"

"Illumi, what you're feeling is something assassins should never feel. You should have never had to experience this." Illumi choked down a sob, trying to look away from the boy and into his hands. "Illumi," Kikyo whispered, "What you're feeling now, these emotions, they're not meant for assassins to have. Guilt, regret, all of these things have to be shut out. You know this." Illumi sat down on the carpeted floor, holding his face in his hands. He watched water fall to the floor from his eyes. The pain in his chest swelled in his throat and threatened to suffocate him.

"Illumi, He'll never forgive you."

The words were salt in Illumi's wounded heart. Why would Hisoka hide something so big from Illumi? He imagined Hisoka's face when he found out what he had done. He pictured a scowl of hatred and disgust. It hurt to visualize, but it was all Illumi could see.

"I can't show my face to him anymore..." Illumi wept.

"You don't have to."

"How?"

"Come home. We'll shut out these emotions and you won't hurt anymore. You'll be an assassin again, and you won't ever have to see that man again."

"Is that possible?"

"Of course it is."

"I... I'll come home."

"Good. We'll be waiting." The clicking sound of a phone reached Illumi's ears as Kikyo hung up. Illumi wanted to scream. He wanted to die. It was too much, all at once. For a moment, he really thought he was going to die from the overwhelming and unfamiliar pain in his chest. He looked at his work, the receptionist, Nadyia, and to the boy.

"Disgust. Disgusting. I'm disgusting..." Illumi stood and walked out of the hotel room, eyes puffy and face still red. He caught a glimpse of himself in a mirror in the hallway on his way to the elevator.

"Disgusting." He murmured again.

The apartment felt more silent than ever. Illumi packed his bag, going through drawers in the apartment making sure he hadn't left anything. As he was packing, a card fell out from one of his pockets. He picked it up and studied the familiar card once more. It was the shiny golden Ace of Hearts Hisoka had left behind. Illumi was fond of it before, but now he felt guilty just looking at it. He left the card on the bed along with the key Hisoka had given him. He locked the knob from the inside before closing the door behind him.

Chapter 8, Fin

Note: I love Illumi, I do. This is why I torture him so. Stay tuned, I'm eager to finish the next chapter. Thank you for all the reviews!


	9. Broken

Hisoka had spent a long time on Greed Island searching for Abengane with not much to go on. It wasn't in the slightest his idea of fun. Just before he died of bordom, something piqued Hisoka's interest. Gon and Killua had found him and roped him in to what could only be described as a dodgeball game of death which was actually the most fun Hisoka had on that god forsaken rock. He could hardly wait to tell Illumi all about it.

He ended up with all ten of his fingers broken, but those injuries were no match for Machi's touch (She threatened to sew his mouth shut when he made a crude joke involving fingers which Machi did not appreciate).

Gon won the game that had previously controlled the island, and Hisoka's fun was over. Greed Island didn't hold any more promise for entertainment, and Hisoka couldn't help but miss a certain assassin waiting at home for him.

Abengane was easy enough to find in the end, once Hisoka actually looked for him. They left the island together and met Kalluto at a dock at the nearest continent. Kalluto wasn't alone, he had brought Nobunaga with him.

"I've brought you your little Nen exorcist. I want my phone." Hisoka held his hand on his hip as he spoke. Kalluto tossed Hisoka his phone as Abengane moseyed over to the two members of the troupe. Hisoka caught the device easily and smiled.

"Where's Chrollo?" Nobunaga huffed. Hisoka's phone beeped as he turned it on.

"Thank you. See, Kalluto... you're a cold one. I know you'd never actually kill your brother, but you'd do something equally terrible, wouldn't you?" Hisoka ignored the samurai as he dialed Illumi.

"Hisoka." Kalluto said, impatiently.

"Can't you see I'm on the phone? Rude."

"You said you'd give us Chrollo."

"Well I can't give you Chrollo just yet, now can I? He'd die just talking to one of you."

"Now we have the exorcist who can cure Chrollo of his chains. Don't you want to fight him?" Hisoka ignored Kalluto as he listened to the ringing, waiting for an answer.

Nobunaga gripped the handle of his blade, shaking furiously in his skin as he watched Hisoka. "Why can't we just kill him now?" He snarled.

Kalluto waved away Nobunaga's comment and addressed Hisoka again. "Where is he?"

"Funny.." Hisoka frowned as he looked down at the small screen. A voicemail greeting began to play and he hung up. "Illumi must be busy."

"Hisoka." Kalluto persisted calling his name.

"He didn't answer. I guess I'll just have to talk to him when I get home." Hisoka mumbled. Nobunaga opened his mouth to blurt something, but Kalluto silenced him with a glare.

"I'll give you Chrollo when I know where he is." Hisoka sighed.

"You want us to believe you don't know where he is?"

"I would have already brought Abengane directly to him if I knew where he was, wouldn't you think?"

Nobunaga was just about ready to rage.

"Nobu~ don't be so cross." Hisoka cooed. "If you keep looking at me like that, I just might-"

"Fine." Kalluto interrupted Hisoka before things became too disgusting.

"We'll hold on to Abengane for now."

"Good. I'm not about to babysit." Hisoka looked at Abengane for a moment, who remained silent. "You've been awful quiet."

Kalluto glanced at Abengane while Nobunaga kept focused on Hisoka.

Abengane exhaled slowly. "I don't mind being treated like a tool. S'long as I get paid."

Hisoka clicked his tongue and smiled. "You're in luck! The phantom troupe has a knack for acquiring hoardes of money and expensive goods. Isn't that right, Kalluto?"

Kalluto squinted at Hisoka, but nodded at Abengane.

"Well everything is settled for now. I'll be going." Hisoka had no qualms about turning his back to the two members of the troupe. Anyone else would have backed away slowly, but as Hisoka jollily bounced away, Kalluto noted the general lack of fear Hisoka had.

"That man is a beast." Kalluto mumbled.

"Well, he was a member, or pretended to be, for a time." Nobunaga relaxed the grip he had kept tight on his sword.

"Still, even for a member of the troupe, he's strong."

"He's sneaky." Nobunaga said with a huff as he turned to walk away. Kalluto and Abengane followed suit. "So you're just going to let him find out on his own?"

"He probably already knows."

…...

…

The blimp ride back to Yorknew city was agonizing and boring, but Hisoka couldn't sleep. Not with all the anxiety poisoning his blood and making him antsy. Thankfully the trip was over just before Hisoka crawled out of his skin.

He arrived home late at night. He opened the door and reluctantly called out for Illumi. The only sound in the apartment was the beeping from a recording left on his answering machine. He hung his bag on a rack on the wall in the hallway and pressed play on the machine.

FOUR NEW MESSAGES. MESSAGE ONE: "Good evening Mr. Morow. My name is Robin Taft and I'm with the Yorknew city police. We'd like to speak with you about your wife, Nadiya. If you could please give me a call back, I'd really appreciate it."

MESSAGE TWO: "Mr. Morow this is Robin Taft with the police. We'd very much like to speak with you. Please call us back."

MESSAGE THREE: "Hisoka. This is Machi. I don't know who the hell you think you are or what you're playing at but you better tell me where Chrollo is. Kalluto told me everything. Don't think I don't know you know where he is. I know you, clown. I know you're hiding him somewhere and it's only a matter of time before we find him. I can't believe you Hisoka, really. I don't care if you think you're stronger than me. I'll kill you, Hisoka. I'll fucking kill yo-"

MESSAGE FOUR: "Kalluto. It's done." Hisoka recognized Illumi's voice immediately.

"Nadiya is dead?" Hisoka knew it was Kalluto's voice, but Hisoka's heart almost stopped when he realized what he had asked.

"Yes."

"You killed her?"

"Yes..?"

"Good. And the boy?" Hisoka frowned as static from the machine briefly polluted the audio.

"Her son. He should have been with her."

"I'm looking right at him." Hisoka's breath caught in his throat.

"Oh, good. Take care of him too." The rustle of movement echoed in the recording followed by a sigh from Illumi.

"It's done."

END OF NEW MESSAGES.

It had to be a dream. A nightmare. Hisoka had run into his bedroom, holding out some sort of hope for Illumi to still be there somehow. But all he had found was his Ace of Hearts card and the key to the apartment on the bedspread. Illumi hadn't left a note. He didn't have to.

Hisoka was always more in touch with his emotions than Illumi, but right now he knew there were too many even for him. He sat on the edge of the bed and cradled his face in his palms. There were too many questions running through Hisoka's head to really know where to start.

Hisoka caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror the second he looked up. It startled him, his smile, if you could call it a smile. It was more like a twisted stretching of his skin to either sides of his face. A low chuckle started in his throat and boomed its way out. He was laughing hysterically, at the absurtity of it all.

"Oh, Illumi..." Hisoka purred to himself in his room as he looked fondly over the ace of hearts. "What have you done now?"

...

...

Illumi's wrists were beyond bruised. This position was painful, yes, but nothing he couldn't bear. His arms were outstretched behind him and his wrists tied in leather straps attached to chains on the wall behind him. His knees would have been scraped if not for the saving grace of his pants protecting him from the rough stone ground. This wasn't so bad. This was home. He knew his mother was holding back her punches. He didn't want her to. He knew he deserved punishment for what he'd done. Perhaps father would be a better executioner. Whatever the case, he was just thankful to be home.

"Don't fall asleep." Kikyo's voice kept him focused and he snapped out of his thoughts.

"Good. Now, tell me again why this is happening to you." Kikyo held a taser wand in one hand, swinging it from side to side as she spoke.

"This is all on me. This is my fault. I put our family in danger and I sinned against Hisoka."

That earned Illumi a shock to his ribcage.

"What did we say about that name?"

"Not to say it." Illumi grunted as another shock stung him. He tried to breathe through it, like he had learned to do so many years ago, but it still came as a surprise to him and he jolted.

"That's right. So why do you insist on dragging this out?"

"I need to- I need to atone." Illumi panted. He hated the way his body would grow exhausted despite the strength of his mind. "I need to be punished for what I did to Hisok-AGH!" Illumi's head shot up and he grit his teeth as the voltage went up against the small of his back and up his spine. It burned where the baton had touched his skin.

"Do you think I enjoy doing this, Illumi?"

"No, you don't."

"Then why do you continue this? Is it your wish to see me suffer, too?"

"No."

"Then keep that name out of your mouth. Don't say it in my presence. Don't think it to yourself. We don't speak about that man. Do you understand?"

"Yes."

"Are you done then? Are you ready to apologize?"

"I'm sorry. I put the family in danger be not being careful. I was slipping."

"Good. Are you done suffering then?"

"No, not yet."

"Why not?" Kikyo pulled the wand uncomfortably close to Illumi's face, and he pulled away instinctively before his shackles caught tight and he could move no more.

"I can't face the family yet. Not yet." Illumi pleaded. Kikyo powered down the taser and set it aside.

"Fine. Rot in here a little longer, but remember that I gave you the chance to leave. I'll be back to check on you after dinner." Illumi watched as his mother left the room and closed the metal door behind her.

He was by himself now, and by himself he could sob. His chin rested on his chest as he hung his head. He couldn't wipe his face with his hands, but at least he could cry in peace. He'd never really cried before. Not like this. His hair hung in tangled strands in front of his face. He wanted desperately to be clean, and to wash his hair. A memory of Hisoka brushing through Illumi's long black hair for him flashed through his mind.

"Hi..Hisoka.." Illumi whispered to himself. How long had Hisoka been married and didn't tell anyone? Did Chrollo know? And the boy... That boy was Hisoka's. There was no doubt in Illumi's mind. Illumi knew Hisoka was a man of secrets, but this was bigger than Illumi could have imagined. "Was she an estranged wife?" Illumi thought back to the incomplete case file. She was known to make money on her bets at Heaven's arena. "Would she bet on Hisoka? Where they still in contact?" Illumi choked on an especially hurtful thought that wondered if Hisoka was using Illumi like a mistress. An affair. Hisoka was having an affair and Illumi was the other woman... or man... or the ... other person.

Illumi dwelled on her face. She was a beautiful woman, sure. Objectivley speaking she was stunning. She had black hair, if Illumi remembered correctly. She was small, though. That surprised Illumi more than anything. Most of the time Hisoka was attracted to people with power, and Illumi hadn't sensed any Nen on her at all. She was an easy killing. There was absolutely no resistance about her when Illumi assassinated her. The child... The boy was different. He had reminded Illumi of Killua, in a way. Illumi couldn't shake the image of his face out of his head.

"What.. What was his name?" Illumi thought hard trying to remember if there was a mention of a name anywhere in the file or at the hotel. Nothing. Illumi murdered Hisoka's son and he didn't even know the child's name. What a fucking riot.

A thought crossed Illumi's mind. "What if he was named after Hisoka?" Illumi shook his head. That idea alone somehow made it worse.

Just then, there was a metal scraping of the heavy door against the stone floor as it opened. Illumi kept his focus on the floor, hiding his puffy eyes and wet face from whoever just entered. Footsteps approached. Illumi listened closely to the controlled breathing of the person standing in front of him. From what he could tell from where the breathing was coming from, it was someone shorter than him. He heard a clank and dragging as something from the table of torture tools was picked up.

"You really got yourself in a pickle this time." Illumi's eyes shot wide open when he heard the voice and he lifted his head, unafraid to show his face anymore. It was Kalluto.

"Don't give me that look. You brought this on yourself." Illumi didn't wince as Kalluto stabbed the prongs an instrument into his shoulder.

"Have you been crying? Gross." Illumi said nothing except the words his glare shot at Kalluto.

"You really ought to know, digging up that dirt on Hisoka was quite the challenge, but Milluki can find dirt on anyone. Especially if he has access to that person's transmitter."

Illumi grunted. He knew now why Hisoka hadn't been calling him. Kalluto had taken it from him somehow.

"Did you know he was still in contact with her before you killed her?"

"Shut up."

"Ah, so you can speak." Kalluto held a new instrument in front of his face. "You remember this, don't you, brother?" Illumi knew what it was, but to his knowledge, nobody in his family had ever used it before. It was only really brought out on enemies to scare them, but not on family. Not ever on family. Illumi eyed Kalluto's face. He wasn't smiling. He didn't jest. He was looking for an answer.

"Pear of Anguish." Illumi breathed out the words.

"Also known as the Choke Pear." Kalluto lowered himself to Illumi's face to look directly at him. "I've heard that the intended use of this is to open the mouth of the tortured." Illumi instinctively clenched his jaw.

"Relax, I'm not going to use it on you." Illumi exhaled. Kalluto smiled.

"There's another, more impractical use for this." Illumi narrowed his eyes at Kalluto, trying to figure him out.

"You seem to already know what that is."

"if you're not going to use it on me then why bring it up?"

"I want you to know how serious I am."

"About what?"

"About Hisoka."

Illumi watched in silence as Kalluto waited for a response. When Kalluto realized Illumi planned to say nothing, he spoke again.

"Give up your feelings for him. Give up your guilt. Do it now or the emotions you feel in the coming weeks will kill you in a more painful way than can be physically dealt."

Illumi's eyes went wide.

"The troupe means to kill him."

"This is beyond killing him. They mean to deal some damage..." Kalluto watched Illumi nervously glance at the choke pear. "None of us Zoldycks should be capable of grief, but you went and discovered some new emotions, didn't you? You won't be able to handle it when it happens. It'll be too much, so handle it now."

"And what does Chrollo have to say about all this?"

"Chrollo? He's still missing."

"You mean to tell me the troupe is going to go after Hisoka without so much as an order from your leader? I lived with Chrollo. He wants Hisoka for himself. Frankly, the lot of you won't be able to bring Hisoka down anyway."

"Let us worry about that."

"So let me get this straight- you went through the trouble of sending Hisoka off to find a Nen exorcist without having Chrollo?"

"We'd rather have him and not need him than need him and not have him."

"So then Hisoka is back home?"

"I assume so."

"I should have left him a note."

"You didn't have to. He knows."

"Who told him?"

"You did." Illumi recalled the strange phone conversation he had with Kalluto right after he killed Nadiya.

"You're really the worst one of all of us, Kalluto."

"I may not be the best assassin, but thank you for recognizing my manipulation skills. Hisoka even mentioned I had some potential."

"Kalluto."

"What?"

"Why didn't he tell me he had a wife?"

Kalluto was so startled. He was not ready for how broken Illumi's voice sounded. Illumi was always his older brother: Calm, Cold, Collected. The person kneeling in front of him was very obviously someone else. Kalluto cautiously pulled Illumi's hair back to look at Illumi's eyes. They were the still the same dark, endless orbs they'd always been, but even Kalluto had to admit that Illumi looked terrible. The bags under his eyes combined with his puffy cried-out face looked alarmingly human.

"Illumi?"

"Why..?" Illumi asked again.

"That's not a question I have an answer for, Illumi."

"I know. You were right about him." Kalluto felt something sink in his chest. He Felt. He Felt Something. No. Not possible. Kalluto jerked away from Illumi and stood up, letting Illumi's face fall back down.

"Forget him!" Kalluto almost startled himself with how loudly he spoke. "H-He doesn't have a moral compass like we do, Illumi. He's not good for you. He just sees what he wants and takes it."

"You're right, but I just..." Illumi blinked away tears.

Kalluto grunted at the annoying sensation in his throat. "Illumi, you.. You know you're missing dinner, right?"

"I don't care."

Kalluto grunted, becoming slightly more frustrated.

"Illumi, this isn't you. You've never shown weakness to me. Ever. I'd dare say you've never shown weakness to mother, either. It's like we don't even know who you are anymore. How do you expect to live your life if you keep dwelling on these unnecessary emotions, you're going to end up somewhere you can't get out of."

"I know I'm different. Don't act like I'm not aware of it. I just, It's harder to cut out these things once they've wormed their way into my heart."

"Gross. Cut it out."

"If I could, I would."

"You have to!"

"I can't!" Illumi's voice bounced off the walls of the room. Kalluto calmed himself.

"Fine. Do you want me to bring you food?"

"Don't."

"Don't what?"

"Don't try to show me kindness after what you've done." A sudden yank on Illumi's hair pulled his head back so that Kalluo was looking right into his eyes. Calm rage swirled in his expression.

"You brought this on yourself, remember?"

"I'm here to atone for my mistakes. When will you atone for yours?" Kalluto pushed Illumi's face away with a snarl.

"Fine. Be difficult." Kalluto rose and pulled the prongs out of Illumi's shoulder. Illumi could hardly feel pain at this point, but the feeling of metal sliding out of his flesh made his skin crawl. Kalluto didn't bother to wipe off the blood dripping slowly from Illumi's new wound. He tossed the instrument to the side and left the room.

…...

Chrollo tapped his cigarette out the broken window overlooking the city before drawing in another breath. It was getting dark, but he kept his sunglasses on. He hated the way cigarettes smelled, and he even hated it more when stench lingered on the pages of the books he read, but right now he didn't really care.

"You know smoking's a nasty habit." Chrollo wasn't surprised to hear Hisoka's voice, but he was surprised to turn and see Hisoka by himself.

"It's about time you found me. Where's your boyfriend?"

"I always knew where you were. This is the only abandoned complex within a mile of the public library." Hisoka teased, and Chrollor hated how familiar it felt. He let himself smirk for a moment, but it faded as he waited for an answer to his other question with no reply.

"What happened to Illumi?"

"You should ask your troupe."

"I haven't been able to speak to them. You know this."

"You were real clever to make it look like you had gotten kidnapped, but you made Illumi worry."

"Are you going to tell me where he is or are you going to continue to be a little shit?"

Hisoka tilted his head to the side. Chrollo observed Hisoka for a moment. His posture seemed normal, for the most part. He stood in the moonlit darkness with one hand on his hip, but his tilted head sent shivers down Chrollo's spine. Hisoka's hair was undone and his eyes held bags underneath. He had never seen Hisoka so close to being completely unhinged and still functioning. It was like seeing a starving lion surrounded by meat and sitting calmly without being bothered. Hisoka sighed and spoke, finally breaking the silence.

"Illumi left."

"Did he decide he didn't like clown dick after all?"

"He carried out a hit on my wife and son."

Chrollo gawked at Hisoka.

"You have a wife? And a-a son?" Chrollo stuttered.

"Had. They're dead."

"You got married?!"

"Don't act so surprised."

"You- You want me to not be surprised? When was the ceremony? Was there even a ceremony or did you kidnap some poor woman and-"

"I don't want to get into it." Hisoka interrupted. Chrollo frowned.

"So... What do you want me for? You know I don't have my nen back."

"I have a way to give it back to you."

"Oh? So Greed Island was a success?"

"Yes. The troupe has Abengane."

"So what's your plan then? Are you going to kill Illumi?"

Hisoka looked away, trying to hide the twisted grin. He bit his lip and fisted his hands as he inhaled a sharp breath, trying to calm himself. His fingernails dug into his palm. Chrollo squinted at Hisoka, trying to figure him out.

"Okay so forget I asked." Chrollo said, hands up to protect himself from what seemed like an imminent explosion coming from Hisoka.

"Oh, Illumi..." Hisoka began to mumble to himself now, and Chrollo felt the instinct to run away. He began to move when Hisoka snapped at him.

"Where are you going?"

"The fuck away from you."

Hisoka's grin subsided for a moment as he laughed gently.

"Chrollo, I want to give you your Nen back so we can fight, but first I want to know a few things."

"What are you going to do, torture me?"

"What? No. I'm just going to ask politley. If you really want to be tortured, though~"

"Gross, I didn't mean it like that. Just ask."

"I have a feeling Illumi went back home to the Zoldyck Mansion. You ever been?"

"To the Zoldyck Mansion? No. Are you planning to go talk to him?"

"Maybe. Are you in?"

" _In_? You want me to go with you? Are you expecting some kind of resistance?"

"Something tells me his family won't be too happy to see me."

"And why's that?"

"I've met exactly two of illumi's siblings and one of them is the new number four in your troupe. He makes it very clear about how much he dislikes me."

"And the other?"

"Killua. Gon's friend."

"Ah, Gon and Killua. I remember them. They've got such promise.."

"Don't get me started on those two."

Chrollo chuckled and twisted his cigarette into the concrete, putting it out. "So you want to know about the Zoldycks, hm? Okay. This should be interesting to watch anyway."

"Glad you're on board. Take off those sunglasses. It's dark out."

Chrollo rolled his eyes behind his shades. He followed Hisoka out of the room.

"So, like was it a shot-gun wedding?"

Hisoka punched Chrollo in the shoulder, not bothering to look at him.

"You gotta tell me eventually!"

"Hey, Chrollo you know what?"

"What?"

"Bungee gum has the properties of both rubber and gum."

"What does-" Chrollo flung through the air following a quick movement of Hisoka's hand, hitting an adjacent wall hard enough to press the air out of his lungs. Chrollo wheezed for a moment, trying to catch his breath as he slowly stood back up from where the force of it all had knocked him back.

"Patience. I'll tell you everything in time."

….

…

Chapter 9, Fin

Note: Aye it's that one author you secretly hate because they never update, Fluffy! I really enjoy writing this fic. I promise it gets better I know the last two chapters have been angsty BUT I've been trying really hard to be a better writer for you guys! (Because you all deserve a well written fic for this ship) Please let me know what you guys think of all the sad stuff (I hope some of it still makes you laugh though)

You guys are great! I'll be updating again soon.


	10. Daddy Issues

The weight of the shackles lifted from his wrists, and his arms dropped to Illumi's side, having gone numb hours ago. His father slapped gently at the skin on his face and arms, coercing the feeling to come back. It was working. The sharp electric feeling creeping down from his shoulder was nothing short of painful. Silva lifted Illumi to his feet with a grunt, and it was like standing for the first time the way his weight stabbed against his feet like knives. He didn't protest when his father walked him to the nearby med table to sit. The cushiony plastic feel was much more comfortable than where he had been forced to kneel on the floor.

Silva stepped aside for a moment and brought back a basin and a towel with water as well as a bottle of antiseptic. Illumi kept his face lowered, but he wanted to look at his father's face. He wanted to see if his father would scowl at him for being a disappointment, but from what he could see from the corner of his eye, his father was solely concentrated on cleaning up Illumi's shoulder and back. Caked, dried blood which had crusted to the contour of Illumi's shoulder came off easily. It was a puncture wound, something Illumi was used to. He knew it would need to be stitched, but he didn't want to think about it. He didn't want to make a sound, but he couldn't help but hiss when he felt the sting of antiseptic on his back where he had been burned.

"Hold still." Silva grabbed Illumi's shoulder to still him as he tended to the burn.

"I told your mother to watch it. This is going to leave a mark."

"It's not like it matters. I have plenty of burns and scars. One more won't matter."

Silva frowned. They both kept quiet after that. Silva placed a set of clean clothes next to Illumi and left the room. Illumi moved to stand, and he winced at his aching joints, stiff from not moving for so long.

He glanced at the set of clothes still on the table. Illumi wanted desperately to shower first. He grabbed his clothes and left the room for the first time since he got home. He made his way to his bedroom. It still looked the same as when he left; clean and organized. He stepped off into his personal bathroom. He nearly jumped out of his skin when he saw his own reflection. His skin was so pale it was almost transparent. He could see his veins, blue and purple and green, through his translucent flesh. His face was thinner and his eyes were sunken. Dark bags circled his sockets. He looked awful. He snarled at his reflection and turned away to start the shower. His shower was a large glass enclosure with beautiful lavender and black tile. He loved his shower. He missed it.

The water was near scalding, but it was just what Illumi wanted. He washed his hair thoroughly and let the heat melt away his pain. He closed his eyes for a moment. There was someone at the edge of his mind, trying to creep in. He opened his eyes, forcing away thoughts of gold eyes and red hair. He rinsed his hair and conditioned it to perfection. A name rested on the tip of his tongue, ready to fall out at any second. Instead of words, Illumi grit his teeth together, unwilling to speak the name as if somehow it would kill him to do so. The last of the conditioner rinsed out of his hair. Illumi turned the water off and stepped out.

He dried himself with a soft and lush towel. He wrapped it around his waist. He stepped over to his mirror and took another look at himself. He looked slightly better. Cleaner, for sure. His hair wasn't a mess and his skin was clean, but he was still less than happy about how he looked. He opened a cabinet and pulled out a small box filled with thin needles. He carefully picked one up and pushed it into the side of his face. His right eye slowly lifted and his bags smoothed out. He did the same for the other side of his face. The needles stuck out, but this was only temporary. He pinched the skin in his arms before pushing a needle in. Color pooled in his skin, making him less see-through. Veins disappeared. He took a step back to appreciate his work.

"That's better."

...

...

"They have a what?" Hisoka sat at his breakfast nook in his apartment, watching Chrollo stare out the window to the city beneath them.

"A giant hound." Chrollo responded without so much as a glance in Hisoka's direction.

"A giant hound?" Hisoka repeated.

"A giant hound. His name is Mike. Have you called back the police department?"

"Okay so not only do they have a ridiculously heavy gate, but they have a guard dog?"

"Mike is more like a machine than any animal, really. And you forgot the butlers."

"Butlers... Illumi did mention butlers a lot."

"Yep." Chrollo finally tore himself away from the scenery of the bustling city to join Hisoka. He took a sip of hot tea from his mug. The one with 'Fuck' on it. "You know, Hisoka I really can't say I missed it here."

"Let me ask you something," Hisoka said, ignoring Chrollo's last statement, "how many butlers do they have?"

"Pfft, god I don't know. All I know is every single one of them can use Nen. It's a requirement to work for them."

"Oh really?" Hisoka grinned at the thought of a mansion filled with Nen users.

"Too many for even you to take on, maybe." Chrollo warned.

"I can only begin to imagine what kind of fun that would be..." Hisoka seemed to vibrate in his seat as his mind wandered. Chrollo nearly gagged.

"Look, Hisoka. You gotta be smart about this. Even if you did get past all the butlers, do you plan to fight the Zoldycks too? Not that it wouldn't be fun to see, but I'm more than 100% positive Illumi would kill you just for thinking it."

"That's another problem. Illumi..."

"What?"

"He's there now, with his family. I'm not even sure he would want to see me."

"Uh, correct me if I'm wrong but, didn't he like murder your only existing family or...?"

"Family? Oh please. That breeder and her spawn were hardly family."

"Uh? Breeder?"

"They're vultures, all of them. They stalk places like Heaven's arena for particularly strong fighters and pair them up with brilliant minded individuals. They want to make some kind of super race or whatever. They're a real bunch of weirdos."

"Okay now I have even more questions."

"Shoot."

"So, that woman... and you?"

"She gave me an offer I could hardly refuse."

"And what was that?"

"A chance to fight the kid once he grew up."

Chrollo's mouth hung open. Hisoka blew on his tea to cool it. The mug had "Manwhore" written in a pretty font.

"You.. You wanted to fight your own kid?"

"Of course. If in the off chance he would have grown up to be just as strong as I am but with an edge on me for intelligence, not to mention youth, could you imagine it?"

"No, I couldn't imagine it." Chrollo watched as Hisoka sipped his coffee. "Too bad Illumi killed him."

"Not really. The kid had a heart condition. He never would have been able to fulfill my expectations."

"Ouch. Talk about daddy issues."

"Gon, on the other hand..." Hisoka trailed off. Chrollo cleared his throat.

"That still doesn't explain why that woman was your wife."

"We were legally married. That way she could bet on me as much as she liked and if for any reason I was killed at heaven's arena she would get compensated."

"And you were okay with that?"

"Why wouldn't I be? I was never in it for the money. She made her bets and stuffed her pockets, I fought. It's not like I was dying anytime soon and if I did there was no one I cared enough about to receive compensation. So we were married. We hardly talked. Last time I spoke with her she told me she was going to be in town on other business and wanted to know if I was going to be fighting."

"Who set this up?"

"Hm?"

"Did she approach you or did someone match you two?"

"Well I only ever met her but there were others. Someone else chose me for her, someone else gave her access to my apartment. She showed up one day and made her offer and I agreed. She made a phone call and someone came to have me sign the papers. They officiated and we were legally married. She stayed here, making bets on me when I fought and she didn't leave until she had what she came for. I didn't hate her, but I didn't love her. She wasn't at all my type. She wasn't strong. In fact she was frail. I almost killed her the first night we-"

"Okay thanks I think I get it."

"Right. Anyway, I got a call a few months later when the kid had been born. I had to go to sign whatever papers that said I was the father. I didn't have to hold the kid so I didn't. It was around last year that she told me he had a heart murmur. They wanted her to try again, so we did. She miscarried twice before she convinced them we needed to stop. Now that she's dead they'll probably want her money before they try to match me with someone again."

"Why don't they already have her money?"

"Oh did I tell you? I called the police back. They made an arrest. Some rival businessman had a hit on her. Since I was her husband I get all her stuff. I own her businesses, but I don't particularly care for them."

"Hisoka are you telling me you're filthy rich now?"

"I'm filthy rich now."

"Damn. I think I'll have to rob you."

"Good luck without your Nen."

"Soon enough, Hisoka."

Hisoka chuckled and took another sip of his tea. Chrollo had laughed too, but out of the corner of his eye, Hisoka could see Chrollo frowning.

"Did you ever meet him?" Chrollo asked.

"Meet who?"

"Your kid."

"No. I didn't want to."

"Do you even know his name?"

"Albert, I think. She named him."

"You're really something."

"What?"

"You just have no idea what's wrong and what's right, do you? You're completely self-serving."

"I think that's not entirely true. I know what's considered wrong and right I just don't care."

"So if you wanted to, you could pretend to be a normal person?"

"Of course, but where would be the fun in that?"

"Deceiving people. In particular, the Zoldycks."

"I'm not following you."

"The butlers. They're always looking for new ones. If you came to their door with a recommendation from me, they might hire you. You could infiltrate their ranks and-"

"That'd be a great idea if the family didn't already know what I look like."

"So? Texture surprise your face. Dye your hair. Wear contacts. I'll even help you."

"Wouldn't it be a little strange if I came with a recommendation from someone they know has been missing?"

"Okay you're right on that one..."

"I can forge a recommendation from someone else... Or I could just tell them I'm a pro Hunter."

"No, you can't be a hunter. If they find out you're a hunter they'll kick you out."

"Why?"

"They'd want to know what you are hunting."

"Okay. Point taken. Then.."

"I could make up a name, give my phone number and when they call I'll tell them all about how great you are!"

"This isn't going to work what the hell am I even thinking?"

"I think it could."

"But you're crazy."

"What, and you're not?"

"I resent that."

"Do you want to get to Illumi or not?"

"...Fine. Let's do this."

...

…...

Illumi panted as he exerted himself in one of the many training rooms there were in his family's mansion. He faced six butlers. He could dodge them easily and make swift attacks to the back of their necks if he wanted to, but killing them would be a waste. He sparred with them nicely, and when the timer indicated their session was done, another Butler was ready with a towel and water. Illumi accepted it and left the room. He passed his mother in the hall without a word. Everyone had been keeping their distance. It was probably better that way. He almost passed up his father's room, but something pulled him to a stop. Questions that needed answers pounded in his head. He turned and knocked on the door. He waited for a moment before the large doors creaked open on their own.

"Illumi, come in." Silva sat with MIke's head next to him. He pet the family's massive dog as he spoke.

Illumi stepped in and sat down next to his father. When Silva looked at him, ready to hear him, he felt the need to run, but he stayed.

"You... You allowed Killua to have a friend. You allowed him to leave. I just want to know-"

"Killua is still a child. He is an assassin, but he is young and has time to come back to us still. You, however, are not. Not to mention, that man was no friend. He was your lover. You have responsibilities to tend to. Watching your brother, for starters, which you still have no idea where he is. You let yourself become distracted. We cannot have that."

"I see.."

Silva sighed. "Illumi, your mother is convinced you are over this. Don't let her see you with such a human expression on your face."

"Oh, right. Sorry." Illumi hadn't realized what his face must have looked like to his father, and for a moment he was ashamed.

"Is that all?"

"Uh, no. Actually, when can I go on another job?"

"That's my boy. I'll see what work there is to do and send you a new case file."

"Thanks." Illumi got up and walked out, pleased to know his father was happier with him now. He'd never notice the frown on Silva's face as he left.

…...

...

"Hi-" Hisoka cleared his throat. "Hiro."

"Hiro?" The Butler in front of Hisoka was an elderly woman with two pigtails. She was huge, considering she was as old as Hisoka thought she was.

"Yep. That's my name. Hiro." Hisoka's eyes felt dry underneath the colored lenses Chrollo had made him get.

"You got a surname?"

"Mori."

"Hiro Mori?"

"That's me. Here's my resume." Hisoka quickly 'Texure Surprised' his resume before handing it over. She barely glanced over it before tossing it on the desk between them.

"Can you see it?" A faint glow appeared around her body.

"Your Nen? Yes. I can see it."

"Good. Then you're hired."

"That's it?"

"We'll see how long you survive here, 'Hiro'." Hisoka couldn't help but grin.

"Follow me." Hisoka followed the woman without hesitation. They left the small office and were outside. Hisoka had made it past the gates without encountering the dog and found his way to the Butler's quarters without trouble. Granted, had he tried to come in looking for a fight, he wouldn't have gotten far, but coming in to look for a job was hardly an easy task.

"My name is Tsubone, but you can call me Ma'am. You'll be proving your worth for the rest of your life with the Zoldycks. You will be loyal entirely. I don't care where you've come from or what kind of life you have lead, here you will abandon it all. If Hiro is who you want to be, then that's what we'll call you, but make no mistake. If you give us any reason to believe you aren't loyal to the family... " Tsubone halted outside of a building. The heat from the sun made Hisoka wonder how every one of them dealt with having to wear those stuffy outfits all the time.

"Well I'm sure you understand."

"Perfectly, Ma'am." Hisoka felt like a child as his words left his mouth. He wasn't intimidated in the slightest, but calling someone Ma'am and being polite was never really his thing. It made him want to puke.

"If you can beat me, you can stay."

Hisoka's attention snapped back as he realized she had opened the door to a sparring room. She meant for him to fight her. She seemed to be serious, so he intended to give his all.

"Okay then."

…...

…...

Illumi sat across from Kalluto. Milluki was to his left. His mother sat across from him and to the right. Silva sat at the head of the table next to both Kikyo and Illumi. Butlers came and went serving dinner and filling glasses. Illumi was silent as he ate, being careful to keep his expression unreadable and cold.

"Illu?" Kikyo's voice was soft. Illumi looked up at her.

"We got a letter this morning from an organization."

"What kind of organization?"

"Well, they're a match-making service, really. They're similar to the people who matched your father and I." Kikyo gestured to Silva and then herself as she spoke. Milluki continued to inhale his food next to Illumi.

"Oh." Illumi kept himself monotone as best he could.

"Yes, well. They got word of your talents."

"And?"

"And, well.." Kikyo trailed off and looked to her husband.

Silva swallowed whatever food he had been chewing on and spoke. "They've found someone for you."

Illumi looked to his father, and then to his mother. Both of them looked back at him. "Why would they feel the need to match someone with me? I'm not the heir to the Zoldyck household."

"Well, they're not only interested in the heirs. You see, if they think someone is particularly strong, they match that person with someone of high intelligence in order to make perfect children. They pay handsomely."

"Perfect children?"

"Yes. They want you to father their next project."

"I.. Does that mean I'd have to- uh.. with a woman?" Illumi could feel his face becoming beet red. He noticed his father's brows begin to furrow and he tried his best to eat something to distract himself from the conversation he was having.

Kalluto didn't look up from his food as he cut into his steak.

Kikyo cleared her throat, "Ahem. Well, from what I understand, the partners they choose usually become legally married so that the project is done... traditionally. However if that's going to be a problem.."

Silva chimed in with food still in his mouth, "That won't be a problem." He looked at Illumi as if to ask, "Right?"

Illumi inhaled, giving him a second to think. He'd never dreamed about having sex. Ever. It wasn't until a certain clown came along that changed that. Now, Illumi wasn't sure he'd be able to try again with someone else, someone that he didn't know entirely. Illumi exhaled, his time was up. His parents, and even Milluki, were all looking at him. Kalluto didn't bother masking a grin on his face.

"Right, hah. It's no problem."

Kikyo smiled. "Good. Then I'll contact them back with the news." Illumi looked down at his plate, hardly touched at this point. He wasn't hungry anymore. He excused himself from the table and went to his room to review a case file for his next hit.

…..

…...

The match was over. Hisoka hadn't broken a sweat. Tsubone called off the match as soon as she realized no matter what she did, she would lose. She wiped her face with a towel and congratulated her opponent.

"Well done, Hiro. With skills like that I'm sure Gotoh will put you in a good position somewhere in the house."

"The house?"

"Yes. Don't get excited just yet, though. You'll still need to learn to become a proper Butler."

"How long will that take?"

"As long as it needs to. Your fighting skills are something else, I have no doubt you'll be able to protect the family for years to come. However, you will still need to attend to the family like a true Butler should. I doubt you have any experience in that matter."

"I.. No."

"Good. We'll get some time to teach you then."

"You mentioned someone named Gotoh?"

"He's the Zoldycks most trusted Butler and your new boss. Once you're done training here, he will decide where to put you."

"So that's not up to you?"

"Not in the slightest."

"Well then, I guess we better get started."

"I'll send for a new uniform for you."

…...

…...

Illumi scrolled through pages of information silently. He could hear footsteps outside his door. At first he waited for a knock, but when the footsteps turned to leave, he called out.

"Come in."

There was a hesitation, but the doorknob turned and the door creaked open. Kalluto stood in Illumi's doorway.

"Did you need something?" Illumi asked.

"I was just- I'm leaving. I'm going to meet up with the troupe."

"Okay? What does that have to do with me?"

"You- uh. I just... You don't have to do this. I mean what mom was saying."

"I already agreed to it. Besides, what do you care?"

"I don't care. I was just going to say it's a stupid idea."

"I know it's a stupid idea. Marrying someone we don't know? That's going to backfire."

"Then why are you gonna do it?"

"That's none of your business."

Kalluto looked away for a second. The sudden silence made Illumi itch.

"You know, Illumi. You don't have to do this to be over Hisoka, It's okay if-"

"Shut up!" Illumi's raised voice and heightened aura startled Kalluto.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-"

"Get out!"

Kalluto scrambled to close the door to Illumi's room. He could feel the death oozing off of him. The air was thick and suffocating. Right as the door closed, Kalluto swore he thought he saw an inhuman version of Illumi. He didn't open the door to check or investigate, but for fear of his life hurried away from the hallway.

Illumi sat in his room, bloodlust swirling around him. Who did Kalluto think he was? He thought he knew what was going through his mind, that imp. Kalluto didn't know anything. Kalluto should have kept his mouth shut. Next time, Illumi thought to himself, if he didn't watch his mouth Illumi would be forced to take it from him.

...

…...

Phinks stepped into the hotel room where the other spiders were. Nobunaga kept an eye on Abengane. Kalluto was perched on the arm of the couch next to Feitan. They watched Machi and the others play some video game. This was not exactly the meet-up he was expecting, but it was amusing, and altogether annoyingly unnecessary.

Phinks stood silent in the doorway, not saying anything. It took a few seconds for Shizuku to pause the game so they could pay attention to Phinks.

"You guys will never guess who's outside."

"The boogie monster?" Feitan chimed.

"It's Chrollo."

…...

...

Illumi calmed down eventually, enough to actually get to work on his newest assassination. He gathered what he needed and left. It was simple, clean, and over with in a flash. Before he came back to the mansion his father sent him a new case file. Another assassination. No big deal. Once he was finished with that one he came home.

It went on like this for weeks. Illumi would come home, research where Killua might be, and go out for assassinations. Throwing himself into work was a nice pace. He didn't really have to think about anything. He would become frustrated every time he looked for Killua. It was as if he jumped somewhere and was now hiding somewhere off the grid. He'd find him. Eventually.

His mother had responded to that organization and they had sent word that they were very glad to work with Illumi. Illumi moped around that day. He was on his way to spar, lost in thought as he walked down the hallway.

"Ah, Illumi! There you are." Illumi snapped out of his thoughts and found himself looking at Gotoh.

"Gotoh. How are you?"

"Never better, thank you sir. I have someone to introduce to you."

"Oh? Is she here already? Did my mother not want to meet her?"

"I'm sorry I don't follow you. Are you expecting someone?"

"Nevermind. You wanted me to meet someone?"

"Ah, yes." Gotoh turned and gestured for someone to come out. A Butler stepped from around a corner. He had black hair and a scar on his face. Brown eyes. He looked familiar. Too familiar. "This is Hiro. He's going to be your new personal Butler."

Illumi looked at the man standing next to Gotoh. He kept his face focused on the ground, careful not to make eye contact.

"Pleasure to meet you, Hiro."

Illumi watched an all too familiar grin creep up on the face of the new Butler. He lifted his head to speak, and as he did Illumi watched in horrified recognition. The face. His face. It was his. He knew it was him.

"The pleasure's all mine."

Chapter 10, Fin~

...

Note: Your reviews give me so much life. Honestly, I love each and every one of them. Thank you so much guys! Stay tuned.


	11. Mommy issues

Illumi stood silently before Gotoh and the magician that once held his heart - the man who caused him so much trouble. He could feel his blood bubbling with the heat of his own rage just below the surface of his skin. The feeling was familiar and ugly. Illumi wanted nothing more than to slaughter Hisoka where he stood. Where did he find the gall to come to him dressed as a Butler? This had to be a joke, but the look on Gotoh's face suggested it wasn't.

Illumi realized he was in front of his family's most trusted Butler who waited patiently for a response. Killing Hisoka would have to wait.

"Very well." Illumi was able to muster out, keeping his cool long enough for the Butler to curtly bow his head.

"Sorry if we disturbed you, I'll go an introduce our new Butler to the rest of the family."

"No!" Illumi blurted out before he really thought anything through, all he knew for sure is he didn't want his family anywhere near Hisoka.

Gotoh stared at Illumi, wide-eyed in surprise at his sudden outburst.

"If, uh, he's going to be my personal butler then he should start right away."

"Sir, I must insist he meet with your mother at the very least."

If Illumi could physically grip his composure, he would. Instead he gripped his hands against themselves and breathed.

"Sir?"

"Send him to my room when you are done."

Gotoh squinted at Illumi for a moment, trying to figure out his intentions. Illumi looked away from the accusatory stare.

"As you wish." The head Butler turned and beckoned the newest servant to follow him. Illumi watched as they walked away until they turned down another hallway. Illumi exhaled whatever tension was poisoning him.

He placed his palm on the nearby wall to steady himself. He felt his chest heave and his head spin. He couldn't believe what just happened. He questioned whether he had truly seen Hisoka in front of him merely a moment ago, or if he was finally going mad and seeing Hisoka's face on his new Butler. He stumbled backwards and made his way back to his room. He needed to lay down, he thought. He needed to forget.

….

"Madam." Gotoh's bow was low as he addressed the lady of the house. Hisoka followed suit.

"Gotoh! Who do we have here?"

"This is Hiro. He's one of our newest servants. Tsubone claims he holds promise. I hope he can be of use to-"

"I don't need another personal servant. I have you, after all."

"Thank you, My lady, but I thought perhaps he would do well to serve Illumi now that he has returned to us."

Kikyo's eye laser focused on Hisoka. He bowed a little lower, and as he raised his head he was startled to see she had moved far closer. Hisoka was taller than her, but he couldn't help but feel intimidated in the same way he felt intimidated the first time he met Illumi. He noted her black hair which she kept in a tidy updo. He made a mental note to himself not to imagine what her hair would look like down.

"Hiro? Is that your name?"

"Yes."

"Why has Gotoh suggested you be my son's personal assistant?"

"He has your family's best interest at heart."

"And why do you think having _you_ as Illumi's Butler serves my family's best interest?"

"...Tsubone mentioned Illumi has a bit of a temper."

"Did she?"

"Yes."

"She would say something like that, the old hag."

"I have experience dealing with tempers."

"What kind of experience?"

"I'm sure you know of Chrollo Lucilfer."

"We've done business with him in the past, but that's a bridge far too burned for it to be of any use for you."

"Sorry to hear that. He was a troubled student after all."

"Student? You? You trained Chrollo Lucilfer?"

"That's correct."

"So you're from Meteor City I take it?"

"Yes! You know of it?"

"I'm from there, just like Chrollo and just like you."

Hisoka couldn't help but smile at Kikyo's beaming face. He could tell it pleased her to find someone from the same background.

"I take it then I can never fully trust you."

Hisoka's voice caught in his throat. Kikyo continued.

"If you're from Meteor City, I can assume you have the capacity to be sneaky?"

"That's a fair judgment."

Hisoka nearly jumped out of his skin when she started laughing. It was boisterous, and Hisoka calmly ignored his itch to fight her. He knew, just like all the other Zoldycks, she had to be strong. She had, after all, mothered every single one of the Zoldyck children – Illumi included. Her laughter subsided, and Hisoka felt like he could breathe again.

"Good. Then I don't have to worry about asking you nonsense questions. I don't care about whatever intentions you had coming in here. Most of the staff here think they can work for a few years and leave. Forget it. You're going to work for us for the rest of your natural life, and here's how it's going to be from now on. You may be our servant, but your fundamental job is to protect my family. Specifically, Illumi. You will live and breathe and die here serving him. I'm sure Tsubone also told you about Illumi's recent alternative living arrangements."

"I think I might have heard about it."

"Good. Illumi is not to leave the grounds for any other reason than family related work. If he is making a fool out of himself on the outside of these walls, I want you to find out about it and report it to me. If I find that you're hiding something you better have a damn good reason for it or you'll be fed to the dog. Do you understand, _Hiro_?"

"Perfectly."

…..

Hisoka and Gotoh left Kikyo's study and headed to Illumi's room in silence. Hisoka hated silence.

"How long have you been here?"

"I'd like you to keep all personal questions to yourself."

"Oh. Okay, sorry." Hisoka winced at the cold nature. Even the old hag Tsubone had a better temperament when it came to small talk.

"This is the young Master Illumi's room. You will report here every morning at 6 am and serve him whatever he needs until 9 pm, where you are to return to the Butler's quarters. Illumi has a tendency to like to spar with his butler. I must ask you to refrain from doing so. If Illumi tells you to leave his side, you may first report to Madame Kikyo for further instructions. Do not get caught doing anything you are not supposed to be doing."

"Pardon?"

"Kikyo has put an amount of trust in you that I personally do not agree with."

"What, are you jealous?"

Hisoka noted the smallest twinge in Gotoh's expression. Hisoka thought to himself quietly about how nice it would be to slit his throat.

"I'd hoped you'd keep all meaningless jokes aside. They will do you no good here. Anyway, don't fuck it up." Gotoh nodded before leaving.

Gotoh had barely turned around a corner, and Hisoka could feel strong fingers gripping his collar, wrinkling the fabric of his new uniform as he was pulled about face.

"Who do you think you are?" Illumi kept his voice hushed, but the anger in his tone and the sound of the scuffle from grabbing Hisoka and pushing him back against the wall echoed around them.

"Didn't you hear? The name's Hiro."

"What the fuck are you doing here?"

"Careful, Sir. You wouldn't want everyone knowing what a nasty temper you're displaying, would you?"

Hisoka smiled as Illumi moved to his front to face him. He missed Illumi's angry face: pupils narrow and his cheeks flush. Hisoka wondered if Illumi was aware of how cute he looked when he was angry.

Before he knew it, Illumi was pulling him through a door opposite of his bedroom. It was a Library, and it was immense. Illumi dragged Hisoka by his collar through the bookshelves. There were books over and around them. Hisoka had known the Zoldycks were rich, but he never imagined that Illumi actually lived and grew up in such a place until he started to see it for himself.

"Nice place."

"Shut up!"

Illumi threw Hisoka into a nook surrounded by shelves. His back thrust against a wall hard enough to briefly knock the air out of his lungs. Hisoka grinned, enjoying the feeling of being thrown around for once. His grin widened as Illumi stepped to loom over him, hands on his hips and death in his eyes.

"I ought to kill you."

"Like you killed Nadiya?"

Illumi was quick to slap Hisoka across the face. Hisoka just about moaned at the stinging feeling across his cheek.

"You didn't tell me you had a wife!"

"I didn't really see the point."

Illumi gripped Hisoka's collar again with both hands and pulled him up and off the floor, pinning him against the wall high enough to let his feet dangle.

"What WAS I to you?" Illumi's voice was gritty and sounded almost like a growl. Hisoka's blood rushed through his body and the feeling was devilishly enticing.

But it was here, above Illumi, dangling like a ragdoll, that Hisoka could see the hurt in Illumi's eyes.

"Illumi, you-"

"Stop. I don't want to know." Illumi looked away as he let go of Hisoka, letting him fall back to the ground. "You want to be my butler? Fine. I'll treat you like one. Your suit is wrinkled and unacceptable. Fix it before anyone sees you."

Hisoka watched Illumi turn and leave the small enclosed reading area and disappear behind a row of shelves.

"Hey, wait! I still don't know my way around and-"

"Shh!"

Hisoka was startled by Illumi's shush, and startled again when Illumi poked his head out from behind one of the shelves.

"This is a library you uncultured swine. Be quiet. Follow me."

...

...

"We got a letter from the Zoldycks. They seem interested." The man leaned on a desk in the Yorknew City Police Station, reading off a checklist on his phone with a grin. "Prytania? Did you hear what I said?"

"Quiet! Someone will hear you." The officer closed blinds to the windows that separated her office from the rest of the station.

"It's not like they can hear through glass." He moved to sit more comfortably on top of the desk, his tailored suit moving smoothly with him. He glanced at the name plate on the desk that read 'Yorknew City Police Captain Robin Taft' and sighed. "Robin is a hideous name for such a pretty girl like yourself."

The small woman's badge glinted in the light. "That's rude and I resent it. What are you here for, Pariston?"

The impatience in her tone amused the Zodiac, and he smiled his awful smile that she had always hated.

"My dear Prytania, I want to know what the hell you've been doing all this time." Pariston's smile was painful to look at, especially when she knew he was angry.

Prytania winced at the sound of her name. She'd always wanted to change it, and when she got the chance to go undercover she was more than delighted. So now, hearing it in her sacred office, the four walls where normally she could be who she wanted to be, she felt like a stranger in her own skin.

"I've been doing my job."

"Your job? As the police captain? Or as my mole?"

"You know what I mean. I'm only here because you put me here."

"Then where's Hisoka?"

She sighed, "Last I heard he was on Greed Island. There were a number of players who went missing even after the game was cleared. He could be dead, he didn't answer my voicemails after what happened to Nadiya."

"He better not be dead. For your sake."

"Why do you need Hisoka? I thought project Albert was a failure."

"Do you know nothing about business? Our cut from Nadiya's earnings at heaven's arena for the past four years alone have paid for your salary. Not to mention we were able to move to a private laboratory on the east side. Now that she's gone we need to find a replacement and we need to do it fast." Pariston reached in his pocket and pulled out a cigarette box and lighter.

"You cant smoke in here."

Pariston ignored her as he lit his cigarette. "You know, now that we have our own in-vitro lab more people can choose to do business less _physically_ and we get paid more to do it.. Funny how people nowadays are willing to pay so much more just to keep things less messy. Convenience is the future, you know."

"Look, we arrested a rival business owner but there's no telling who put the hit on Nadiya. Last I checked she had been careful to cover her tracks."

"Forget Nadiya. She wasn't the real money-maker. It's Hisoka we want."

"I said if I find anything on Hisoka I'd contact you."

"You also said that about project Gon."

"Project Gon doesn't even belong to us. Besides, you said yourself Gon was advancing nicely after the Hunter exam and we shouldn't be worried about him."

"How stupid are you?"

"Excuse me?"

"If you had really been looking for Hisoka, you would have gotten your little ass behind this desk and done some actual fucking research!"

Prytania looked at Pariston with wide eyes.

"I bet you don't even know who cleared Greed Island, do you?"

"I, no. Was it Hisoka?" Her voice fumbled in her mouth as she watched in horror as Pariston's smile slowly faded.

"It was Gon-Fucking-Freecs! How are you so incompetent that you missed such a huge piece of information?"

"I-"

"I might have been able to deal with Hisoka's absurd habit of letting Gon go every single time he meets him because the man is batshit insane but we honestly thought we could trust you."

"Look I can't be everywhere at once! You put me here at Yorknew and I only have jurisdiction-"

"You're not an actual police officer! We put you here so you could have access to more resources not so that you could work inside the law!"

"I know, but I have to keep appearances and-"

"Don't try to delude yourself. You're not just keeping appearances."

"But dad, I-"

"Don't call me that!"

"..Pariston," Prytania corrected herself. The outburst was startling, so she breathed before speaking again. "I'm trying." She prayed he couldn't hear the shakiness in her voice, but she knew he did.

Pariston sighed, and a cloud of smoke escaped his lips. After a moment, his smile returned and he looked up and directly at his daughter. "I know you are, which is why I've decided to give you another chance."

"Really?"

"Yes. The real reason I've come here, is because I have the most important job for you."

Her eyes grew wide and she couldn't help but smile. She always wondered if her smile looked anything like her father's, or if it looked sweet and genuine.

"The most important? What- what is it?"

Pariston stood up from the desk and stepped towards the small blonde woman. Prytania looked up at her father with wonder and adoration. He reached out to pet her hair.

"Prytania, my sweet baby girl,"

"Yes?"

"We've found a match for you."

"You've- what?"

"Illumi Zoldyck. He's going to be your husband, and you're going to raise his child."

…

…...

Hisoka patted down the jacket of his suit, trying to fit the tie back in place and smooth over the wrinkles. No good, the fabric of his shirt had stretched a bit. Hisoka gave up trying to look any bit better. Illumi peered down a hallway, checking to see if it was clear before yanking Hisoka through the corridor.

"Don't be so rough with me, Illu~ I'll take it the wrong way."

"Ugh." Illumi rolled his eyes and pulled them into a door frame to hide from a butler passing by the hallway adjacent to the one they were trying to pass through.

"So where is your room?"

Illumi gripped Hisoka's arm and pulled him once more down the hallway and into a room. Hisoka knew almost instantly that it was Illumi's. There were no windows, or if there were they were blacked out with heavy curtains. It was no less than extravagant and in the style of most of the rest of the house, but it was uniquely Illumi's.

"I want you to leave."

Hisoka turned to look at Illumi who had just finished locking the door behind him.

"I just got here! How rude."

"Stop playing games with me. I want you gone."

"If you want me gone so badly why did you lock the door?"

Illumi huffed and his face got even redder. "Because I don't want anyone seeing you!"

Hisoka couldn't help but laugh softly at Illumi, which only fueled his rage.

"I'm serious. I don't want you here." Illumi had calmed his tone, but his anger was clear. Hisoka sighed.

"Can we at least talk?"

"There's nothing to talk about."

"Yes there is, Illumi. I need to explain."

"I don't want to hear it. I'm done."

"I'm not."

"Have you made it your goal in life to vex me?"

"She didn't mean anything to me."

"She certainly meant enough for you to hide her from me."

"Look, she wasn't actually my wife, okay?"

"Oh and I guess you want me to also believe the kid wasn't actually yours either?"

"Well, he was mine, and I was technically legally married to her, but I didn't _care_ about either of them."

"No surprise there. I doubt you _cared_ about me either."

"What? Illumi of course I care about you. I lo-"

"Don't."

"Illumi, I know you want to talk to me."

"You're wrong."

"Then why did you lock me in here with you?" Hisoka carefully stepped forward. Illumi stepped back.

"I've spent enough time paying for my transgressions. I'm not going back because of you."

"Going back where? Paying for what?" Hisoka inched forward. Illumi matched the distance backwards.

"Here, in my family, when you break the rules and betray the family, you get tortured. I'm not doing that again because you decided to play dress-up."

"It'll be fine, Kalluto is the only one who's actually seen my face and he's not here. We have time." Illumi felt his back press against the wall behind him as Hisoka closed the distance between them. Illumi gripped onto needles in between his fingers as he stared into the black contacts that covered the sharp golden eyes Illumi remembered.

"Milluki might have also seen... wait. How do you know Kalluto isn't here?"

"He's meeting with the phantom troupe and they have something that will keep them all occupied for a while."

"So you found Chrollo."

"I never lost him."

"And you let me worry about him anyway."

"You're cute when you worry."

"Why aren't you with him now? It shouldn't be too long before he get's his Nen back."

"Because I want to be with you."

Illumi's heart pounded in his chest.

"Hisoka..." Illumi whispered the name like a bad word spoken in a church. "I.." Illumi felt so suddenly small with his back against a wall and his grip on his needles shaking with uncertainty. Even if they were only an inch or two at the most separated in height, Illumi felt like Hisoka was staring down at him from miles away. He wanted to grip on to him and wrap his legs around him just like before, and just the thought alone made his knees weak. But Illumi had responsibilities, and if anyone in his family saw how weak he was being in that moment, he was sure they'd flip. Only Hisoka had ever been able to so easily draw out this kind of reaction from him, so he had to die.

Hisoka jumped back, as if he had read Illumi's thoughts or predicted his movement. Illumi's needles flew through the air quickly and despite Hisoka's reflexes, several lodged themselves into the flesh of his chest, stinging with sharp force.

"If you mess this up, if my family catches you; They'll do terrible things to you." Illumi spoke calmly, Hisoka flicked his wrist to draw a card.

"Illumi, I knew the risks coming here. I wanted to make things right with you."

"What makes you think I'd ever want to make things right with you? You lied to me!" Illumi readied himself to throw another set, but he stopped short. Hisoka held up his hands, with open palms. Illumi knew that gesture meant he wasn't going to fight, but Illumi kept an eye on him, reading him. He still had a card in between his fingers, and Illumi wasn't about to take any chances.

"The card. Drop it."

Hisoka let the card flutter through the air and to the ground. Illumi knew if there was bungee gum on it, the card would have fallen differently. Illumi relaxed his stance slightly.

"I killed your family and suffered for it, and now you want to tell me they meant nothing to you?"

"They weren't family. It was a business deal."

"I still suffered! I paid time and blood for my sins, Hisoka!"

"Sins? You're an assassin."

"You wouldn't understand."

"Help my understand!"

"You're not supposed to betray your friends!"

Hisoka looked at Illumi with wide eyes.

"You- You're not supposed to betray your friends. A-and you're not supposed to run away from family. And you can't kill people that aren't on the hit list... I, I did all those things and more. I endangered my family, I killed someone who didn't need to die, and I almost blew my family's cover completely! I basically abandoned my family for you and you're not an assassin and you're not even a woman... All of these things warranted my punishment and I paid for it dearly. I'm still paying for it! Hell, my grandfather hasn't looked at my face since I got back."

"Illumi, I'm sorry."

"No, you don't get to do that. I've been here and I've been fine until you showed up. I can deal with my consequences. I'm a grown ass man..." Illumi breathed and flared his nostrils. "...but _you_. You make things complicated."

"Complicated? Illumi it's so simple. We could be together. We could be happy."

" _Happy?_ You want us to be _happy?_ "

"Why not?"

"Hisoka, you'll never understand what it's like to be an assassin. You're not from the same world as I am. You'll just never get it."

Hisoka tried to step forward, but Illumi raised a needle at him. Hisoka but didn't dare approach him. Hisoka raised his palms an inch higher, showing again that he meant no harm.

"Illumi, I know we're different, but we were just fine until I left."

"Just fine!? You think we were just fine?"

"Weren't we?"

"Hisoka, you'd talk to Chrollo every day like you wanted to eat him."

"I talk to everyone like that."

"Well, I-"

"Were you jealous?"

"What? No, I- It's just you _really_ wanted to fight him and he was down to fight you too as soon as he got his Nen back."

"So you were jealous."

"So? I Lov-" Illumi stopped and cleared his throat. "I really liked you, and yeah I guess I got a little possessive."

Hisoka bit his lip and Illumi tried his best to ignore the feeling that created in his abdomen. "I knew you'd get jealous. And, It's okay if you were a little possessive. I mean, I've seen how possessive you get over your own family so I kind of expected it."

"But you're not family!"

"I could be if you really wanted it."

Illumi's training as an assassin had helped him hide the small gasp trying to escape him. He knew Hisoka probably said what he said on purpose to get a reaction from him. Everything Hisoka ever did got a raise out of him, and Illumi hated it. He hated how much this single human could cause so much feeling.

"You? In my family? I don't think mother would ever agree to that."

Illumi began to think about all the terrible things his mother would probably do to him if he even suggested bringing this walking trash can into the family. He couldn't imagine it, but he tried anyway.

"You don't have to think so hard, Illumi." Hisoka chuckled.

"You don't get it, my parents expect me to be getting married soon and having children and my mother has already-"

"Whoa, they think you're straight?"

"Well, I don't think I've ever given them a reason to believe I wasn't before you came along, but that's not the point! Listen, my mother has already arranged for me to meet with someone..."

Hisoka looked puzzled.

Illumi explained further, "...Someone they expect me to marry."

"A Girl someone?"

"Well, yeah. They want babies."

"Uh, what?"  
"They are matching me with someone who-"

"Oh don't tell me you're doing that shit."

"What do you mean by 'that shit'? You did it!"

"Yeah, but that was when I was stupid!"

"You were still married to her up until I killed her! Till death do you part much?"

"I was locked in a contract with her and she was funneling money from her bets in Heaven's arena to those goons."

"Those goons? You're not making any sense!"

"The baby goons! They want strong, loyal children to fuel their little army or something."

"Army?"

"Yeah, so they match strong people like you and me to people who are going to enable that kind of loyalty and then they harness the kid's potential."

"Potential, huh?"

"I thought it was a great idea when I signed up. Could you imagine, all these children growing up to have Nen as strong as yours and mine? And then I found out I wouldn't get to fight them all. The only one I was allowed to fight or would ever get the chance to fight would be my own kid, and he turned out to be a dud."

"You should probably stop calling your own kid a dud."

"So anyway, kids like Gon and- I mean-"

"Wait what? Did you say Gon?"

"Nope."

"Don't fucking lie to me what did you say about Gon?"

"Nothing important."

"I swear Hisoka I'll kill you where you stand"

"Are you flirting with me?"

Illumi closed the distance between Hisoka and himself, needle held up to Hisoka's neck. "Killua is with that boy now. You better not tell me that Gon is some kind of-"

"Gon won't do anything to hurt Killua, and you know that."

Illumi said nothing and held his grip on his needles tight. A knock at the door startled Illumi, but he didn't dare take his eyes off Hisoka. Instead he simply commanded, "Enter." The door creaked open and a small figure poked its head through the door.

"Master Illumi?" Amane's voice was so soft, Hisoka almost didn't recognize it as someone talking. Illumi grunted in response to the small servant at his door.

"Ahem." Amane cleared her throat and spoke louder, now that she knew Illumi was unconcerned with her presence. "Your father has requested that I fetch you."

"For what?"

"There's a young lady here to see you." Illumi broke his concentration to look at Amane, but kept his needle's point fixed at Hisoka's Adam's apple.

"So she's here? That was quick. Mother said she sent word out this morning." Illumi said, surprised.

"They work very fast I'm guessing." Amane shrugged.

Illumi looked back at Hisoka.

"I guess I'll have to kill you later."

"I look forward to it." Hisoka chimed.

Illumi put away his needles and brushed his hair back. He noticed Hisoka readying himself to follow him.

"Uh, where are you going?"

"I'm your personal assistant. I go where you go now."

"That's dreadfully annoying. And if I don't want you around?"

"You'll have to take that up with your mother." Illumi scoffed and rolled his eyes dramatically. Hisoka laughed at the petty display, which only further flustered Illumi. It was at this point Amane interrupted the two of them.

"Um, Master Illumi, we need to be going now. Silva and your mother are waiting in the sitting room."

"My mother has a name too, Amane." Illumi raised a brow at the young butler.

"Yes, that she does." Amane turned about face and walked down the hallway. Illumi followed her with Hisoka by his side.

Illumi nearly yelped as Hisoka gave his rear a playful slap, making his face flush red. He'd pay for it all later, Illumi swore it.

... Chapter 11, fin

**** Sorry this took so long! I've just been sitting on this chapter avoiding the editing stage for weeks lololol. Thank you for all your reviews! I really appreciate it so much. Light my way through editing hell with your lovely reviews~ Just kidding I'll be better this time so stay tuned there's another chapter coming in soon.


	12. Loaded Gun

They reached the sitting room and Illumi entered first. Hisoka's initial instinct was to walk with him to one of the lavish sofas, but he quickly noted Amane's placement with her back against the wall and her hands tucked behind her back watching silently. Hisoka mimicked her stance next to her and watched Illumi greet a petite blonde woman in elegant western clothing. Hisoka noted it was similar to the dress a certain woman by the name of Nadiya wore when he first met her. It was tasteful, but everything about her looked dangerous.

Kikyo and Silva sat adjacent to the woman, leaving room for Illumi to sit right across from her. A coffee table separated them, allowing Illumi to examine everything she wore. Hisoka felt a twitch of jealousy as he noticed Illumi observing her for longer than he would have liked.

"I'm sure my mother has told you all about me already." Illumi spoke knives to his mother subtly whenever he could, it seemed.

"Not at all, we were discussing other matters and there's plenty of time for me to become acquainted with you. My name is Prytania. It's very nice to finally meet you, Illumi."

"Pleasure is all mine." Illumi's smile was childish and foreign, but polite nonetheless.

"So, I'm guessing you're curious about the whole process."

"I'm sure I understand the part where we have se-"

"The legal aspect of it all, I mean."

Hisoka could barely keep his jaw from dropping. Illumi was acting almost playful.

"...Right. So, how is that going to work exactly?"

"Well, firstly I'd like to discuss the ultimate goal of this relationship. I want to help give you the children..." she glanced over at Kikyo and Silva, "...and grandchildren that you want. Not just any children- but a strong future generation that will be your family's pride and joy."

"So what's the catch?" Illumi spoke directly at Prytania, who had been talking mostly to his parents. She turned to stare him in the eye.

"Well, there's no catch if you don't want one. Everyone is different, so my company has several options available to meet your needs. If it's the case that you don't want to see the child, then we can arrange that."

"No"

Prytania seemed startled when Silva, Kikyo, and Illumi all said no at once.

"Alright, then I'm guessing you're looking for a more involved plan."

Kikyo placed a hand on Illumi's shoulder as she began to speak. "My son here is looking for something more permanent than just having a kid and being done with it. We're hoping for an option that is more of a lifelong arrangement where we can also raise these babies as the perfect assassins."

"Fantastic. So, I was hoping to know when would be the ideal age for you all to begin the training aspect of the child's life? We are looking at starting as early as twelve."

Silva breathed loudly through his nose before speaking. "Twelve is too late. Illumi had carried out at least several dozen contracts by that age."

"At what age would you suggest?" Prytania's smile was a force against Silva's irritated expression. For a second Hisoka believed Silva would falter and possibly smile back, but his face remained still.

"How about six?" Illumi chimed in.

Prytania's eyes flew wide open, she continued to smile, but it was unnerving and insincere, and Hisoka could see she was not happy with that number as she turned to look back at Illumi.

"Six? That's a little-"

"Too late? We can start at five if that works better for you in the long run." Kikyo interrupted.

"Six is just fine." Prytania breathed and straightened her posture before starting again. "So, then it will be a simple Type One Marriage Agreement. We call it TOMA for short. Basically-"

"Who's 'we'?" Illumi's posture shifted slightly, leaning in closer and scrutinizing Prytania.

"I beg your pardon?"

"Your company. I didn't catch the name of it."

"Oh, I'm with the PB company."

"Peanut Butter?"

"Perfect Babies..."

"That makes more sense."

Prytania's smile turned into a gentle laugh and her cheeks flushed. Hisoka kept thinking about how easily he could kill her, make her skin red with her own blood pouring from the delightful cuts he would give her if he had the chance.

"Are you always this funny?" Prytania batted her eyelashes. Hisoka could puke.

"Not in the show."

"The what?"

"Nothing important. So you were saying something about TOMA?"

"Ah, yes. Everything will be straightforward from here on out. Once we go into a legal marriage we can get started right away on trying, since you opted for the traditional method, I will be staying here. I couldn't help but notice that this mansion is very far from the nearest hospital. I was wondering about the delivery-"

"We are well staffed." Silva asserted.

"Pardon?"

Kikyo piped up, "All of my children were born here. My grandchildren will be no different."

"Ah. Well then I'm glad it's so pleasant here." Prytania's eyes squinted as she smiled wide.

"When will you be moving here to get things started?" Silva slouched slightly on one side, obviously tired of this conversation.

"I can have my things shipped here as soon as possible."

"All right then." Illumi nodded before standing up. Silva soon followed after. Kikyo's laser eye shifted to Amane.

"You. Butler. Show Prytania to the new quarters. She'll be staying next to Illumi's room for now."

Amane nodded and motioned for Prytania to follow her. Illumi was walking out the door, so Hisoka followed. Not after he left did Amane and Prytania follow suit.

The four of them walked down the hallway, Amane ended up behind Illumi and Hisoka fell back behind Amane, hoping to get closer to Prytania. He readied a card in his hand to strike, but he stopped short when he felt pressure on his back. It felt like a gun. He heard a small whisper from behind him.

"So this is where you've been hiding."

"Who are you?" Hisoka whispered in response.

"You didn't answer my voicemails."

Hisoka's memory of the voicemails at his apartment came back to him.

"Robyn?!" Hisoka almost shouted as he turned around. He could see Prytania's expression was shocked, as she was not expecting such a reaction. Hisoka realized how loud he was as Illumi called back to them.

"Uh, what's going on?"

Hisoka took a moment to breath before turning back around. "Robins! A type of bird. I thought I saw one flying in that hallway. My mistake."

Illumi frowned, but turned around and kept moving. Prytania hid her handgun and walked faster to stand by Hisoka's side. She whispered again.

"I can't believe all this time you didn't recognize me."

"Last time I saw you, you were wearing a police uniform and your hair was tied back. Also you wore no makeup. And you looked really tired and worn so when I saw you today all gussied up I honestly didn't know who you were."

"Uh, Thanks?"

"I bet you're still as deadly as ever."

"Is that a joke?"

"What are you doing here?"

"Nadiya and Albert are dead."

"Yeah, I know."

"How? Did you kill them? You know that's a violation of the contract."

"No, I'm not stupid. I didn't kill them."

"Then why are you in hiding?"

"I can't tell you that, but I can tell you who killed them."

"Oh really?"

"Yeah."

"Well, tell me."

"You know well enough everything comes with a price."

"What's your price?"

"Drop this shit with Illumi."

"Excuse me?"

"This contract. It's not going to go anywhere. If it does, trust me you'll end up dead."

"Is that a threat?"

"You don't want to stick around long enough to find out."

"If I'm correct, you're pretending to be a butler here. Am I right?"

"Shh." Hisoka nudged her to shut her up.

"I won't tell anyone if you tell my who killed Nadiya. I think that's a fair enough trade."

Hisoka chuckled under his breath. "I forgot how much I hate you."

"The feeling's mutual." Prytania snarled.

They quieted as the four of them reached the end of the hallway where Illumi's room was. The room opposite was the Library, if Hisoka remembered correctly. So the room a little further down the hall must have been her room.

"The room further down the hall is where you'll be staying, miss." Amane spoke to Prytania in a quiet and polite tone. Prytania waved at Illumi and winked. Hisoka rolled his eyes. Illumi grunted and walked into his bedroom. Hisoka followed and shut the door behind them.

"So."

"So?"

"Now you're getting married?"

"And having kids."

"You certainly move fast."

"Well, It's just a contract, right? Not like I'll actually care about her or the kids I'm going to have with her."

"Ugh."

"What? Are you seriously upset?"

"Of course I'm upset! You were eyeing her like a piece of meat!"

"How do you think I felt when I found out you had a wife?"

"That was different! She was in the past! But you were saying things like- like you wanted to be with her!"

"And? What are you going to do about it?"

"I-"

"Nothing. You're going to do nothing." Illumi handed Hisoka a small lavender ball. "Run me a hot bath."

Hisoka had so much to say to Illumi. How could he be so stupid? How could he really throw away everything so easily? He looked down at the bath bomb in his hand.

"Yes, sir." He finally said. Illumi shooed him away to make his bath. Hisoka dejectedly started the hot water.

…...

…...

"Daddy, they're crazy!" Prytania cried into her cell phone.

"What did they say?" Pariston's voice was calm in her ear.

"They want to start training the kids at age five. Five! Like I know they're supposed to be just projects but they'll be my kids too! I don't want that for them."

"They're world famous assassins, baby girl. They probably train their kids even earlier than we train ours for a reason."

"But they won't take me to a hospital for delivery! They want me to deliver here! Without any medicine or- or- doctors! I'll die!"

"Prytania." Pariston's voice was stern now. "I didn't give this job to you so you could quit."

"I know, Daddy, but I-"

"I told you this is the most important job. I meant it. This is a hard job to do. I never said it would be easy. But you've consistently failed us, and I'm at the end of my rope with you. If you do this job, no one can say anything to you. You'll have sealed the deal on one of the most famous assassins in the world – no one can touch you. But if you should fail, I won't be able to help you anymore. This is your last chance."

Prytania bit her lip as she sobbed into her hand.

"You can do it."

"I don't think I can. I don't think I can do this."

"Don't be weak!"

Prytania hiccuped at her father's outburst.

"You're not weak. I did not raise a weak child. You know who you are? You're the daughter of a Zodiac! You can do this and you WILL do this."

Prytania breathed deep for a moment. "Okay. Okay."

"That's a good girl."

"I love yo-" The phone beeped and Prytania knew Pariston had hung up. She gently put her phone down. She hiccuped a few more times before breathing slow again.

"I guess I don't have a choice."

"A choice for what?"

Prytania shrieked at Hisoka's voice.

"How'd you get in here!"

"Uh, Illumi's room is literally right next door to yours and your door was unlocked."

"What? My door? No it wasn't."

"Okay, you caught me. I may or may not have crawled through the vent to get in here but that's beside the point."

"Why are you in my room?"

"Illumi is taking a bath and he's made it pretty clear how he feels about me so I came to tell you that you can do whatever you want."

"Whoa, whoa, what?"

"Yeah he basically said fuck you, so."

"You- and Illumi? Is- Is Illumi gay?"

"Not gay enough apparently."

"Is that why you were telling me to drop it with Illumi?"

"Yeah kind of. Also the family is fucking bananas, but telling from the mascara running down your face I'm guessing you already figured that out."

Prytania ran to her bathroom to wipe off her makeup. She washed her face, calming the heat on her skin with water.

"Fuck. If I wasn't such a shit agent maybe I wouldn't have gotten stuck here." Prytania said after turning the faucet off.

"Yeah, you kind of suck. I agree."

"Gee, thanks. How supportive of you."

"Anytime."

"You really fell in love with Illumi? He's so, I don't know.. His family is just so-"

"His family is literally his only flaw."

"Is he strong?"

"Immensely."

"Ah, that's why."

"Yep."

"So, tell me. How did you end up here? Last time I checked you were headed to Greed Island."

"Yeah. While I was gone Illumi found out about Nadiya and killed her."

"What? Is he that possessive?"

"He can get pretty jealous, but I have a suspicion that he didn't do it knowingly."

"What do you mean?"

"He never would have killed them if he knew Albert was mine. He values family too much and betraying friends is like sacrilege to him."

"So then, you think someone tricked him?"

"He won't tell me who, but I think it was his brother or his mother."

"Sounds bad."

"Yep."

"So, uh, why are you still here?"

"I was kind of hoping we could maybe fuck?"

"WHat?"

"Why not? I just got dumped and you just had a meltdown. I think we deserve it."

"Hisoka, you're literally so disgusting."

"Is that a no?"

"I hate you."

…...

…...

Illumi sat alone is his bathtub, breathing in the gentle aroma coming from the scented oils mixed with the purple water that swirled around him when he moved. He had to be crazy. Hisoka was here practically begging for his affections, and it was just too easy to knowingly make Hisoka jealous. He deserved a little torture after hiding so much from him, Illumi thought. But the more he dwelled on Hisoka's hurt expression, the more Illumi's heart sank. He sighed, deciding he would finally make things right with Hisoka. He heard a a large clank coming from his room.

"Hisoka?" Illumi called out.

"S-Sorry! I just, uh, I- I dropped- ow! I just dropped something it's okay."

"Come here." Illumi waited in silence. Hisoka stepped into the bathroom cautiously.

"Wash my hair for me."

Hisoka looked around the room and found a stool. He rolled his sleeves up and pulled the stool next to Illumi silently and began gently washing Illumi's hair.

"Are you mad at me?"

Hisoka stayed quiet.

"Hisoka, talk to me."

"I honestly don't know what to say to you."

"Just try."

HIsoka brushed out a strand of Illum's hair as he thought. It seemed an eternity passed before he finally said something. "I know you didn't kill Nadiya and Albert of your own choice."

"I still killed them with my hands. That's all that matters."

"No it isn't. You should not have suffered because of something that someone else made you do."

"It's over now. It's done. There's nothing we can do about what's in the past. All we can do it move forward, so... I'll tell Prytania to go home."

"You don't have to do that."

"Excuse me?"

"Women like her get stuck in jobs like this because they literally have no more chances to prove themselves useful to the company they work for."

"What? PB? The perfect baby company?"

"It's not called PB. It's called You-Gene-Its Corp and they're awful. When Nadiya and I were... together, if you could even call it that, she told me about it. With the money she made from my winnings she was able to fund a lab for them, but it wasn't an in-vitro lab like she hoped."

"What was it?"

"Girls who couldn't seal the deal were put into that lab and forced to crank out babies that were eggs fertilized by the lab. They cut out the middle man, or middle woman, and basically they have no need for surrogate mothers anymore because they put those girls there."

"Are you serious?"

"Yeah. If you send Prytania home, she'll go there and probably die a painful death."

"Okay, that's awful."

"Yep."

"...But weren't you about to kill her yourself back in the hallway?"

"What?"

"Come on. Robins? What kind of distraction was that? You tried to kill her and she pulled a gun on you. I saw it."

"First of all, even if someone did pull a gun on me, I could handle it myself. My Bungee gum does have the properties of both rubber and gum, you know."

"My point is, why do you suddenly care about what happens to her?"

"The girl is strong. She's got potential unlocked and if she has a kid with you, I can only imagine what kind of hell spawn it would be."

"Your motivations sicken me."

"Well, you know I'm a curious guy. Besides, since we're not going to be together I think it'll be interesting to see what kind of assassins come out from this."

Illumi sat up and turned around to face Hisoka, his hair sliding out of Hisoka's hands and the water sloshing around as he moved.

"Who said we're not going to be together?" Illumi looked at Hisoka's face.

"You did." Hisoka spoke softly.

"Oh, right. I guess I did." Illumi leaned in close to Hisoka with half lidded eyes. Hisoka backed away, still sitting on his stool.

"What's wrong?" Illumi's eyes searched for something in Hisoka's.

"I.."

"You what?"

Hisoka turned away from Illumi's stare. "I thought-" Hisoka sighed. "You were treating me like shit, and now... what are you doing?!"

"I'm trying to talk to you!"

"You can't just- gah! Fuck!" Hisoka ran his hands into his hair in frustration. Illumi reached out to touch him. Hisoka flinched at the sensation.

"Hisoka, you said it yourself. It can be so simple. We can be together."

"That was before!"

"Before what?"

"Before... I..." Hisoka's face grew red and he looked at Illumi helplessly. Illumi gripped onto Hisoka's collar and pulled him into a kiss. Hisoka resisted, and Illumi broke away from him.

"Hisoka, I'm sorry."

"You what?"

"I'm sorry. I was being an ass earlier. You being here was just so sudden for me. Especially since it's been so long and you still make me so crazy. I just- I don't know I'm sorry. I love you."

Hisoka felt he could melt. "I love you, too."

Illumi pulled him in close. "Kiss me, already."

Hisoka pulled Illumi's head close to him, and their lips met with gentle force, Hisoka's hands sliding down Illumi's body to his hips and Illumi gripping onto Hisoka's hair. Water spilled out of the tub as their movements became ravenous. Hisoka's hands grabbed onto Illumi's ass, playing with the firmness of it. Illumi bit into Hisoka's lower lip deliberately. Slowly, Hisoka could feel Illumi pulling him into the tub.

He had to be crazy. He had to be crazy. Illumi's thoughts were racing and his heart pounding. Nothing made sense anymore. Not his family, not his duties as an assassin. His head felt light and he could hear his own gasps echoing against the walls in his bathroom as he broke away to break ever so often. When his neck was vulnerable, Hisoka gripped it and held Illumi into place.

"Don't play with me anymore, Illumi." Hisoka's low voice vibrated in Illumi's ear.

"But that's my favorite thing to do."

"I mean it."

"Fuck me" Illumi couldn't get any other words out into the air. It was all he could think. "Fuck me." He repeated. Hisoka's breathing shook. His grip grew tight and Illumi saw him lick his lips. "Fuck me, Hisoka." Just as Illumi had spoken did Hisoka lower his hands on Illumi's rear to his thighs to pull them farther apart. The sudden movement didn't startle Illumi, and he welcomed it with a sigh. He closed his eyes, feeling Hisoka's hand reach up to his hole. He pressed against it with his finger, pushing his knuckle in.

"You've been playing with yourself."

"Fuck." Illumi said under his breath.

"Is that all you can say?" Hisoka pushed further, faster, jerking Illumi's body up with his motion.

"Unh!" Illumi yelped and opened his eyes, and looked at Hisoka looking at him – drinking in all of his expressions.

"Hi-Hisoka?" Illumi choked out a whisper.

"Yes?" Hisoka whispered back.

"Come here." Illumi didn't wait for a response to pull Hisoka into the tub on top of him. This tub was definitely bigger than Hisoka's at his apartment, and Hisoka couldn't help but smile at Illumi's playfulness. Here he was, soaking wet in his new butler's uniform that was already ruined from all of Illumi's tugs from earlier, and now he planned to ruin it further. Illumi reached behind him where Hisoka's hand remained, urging him to continue.

"Turn around" Hisoka said gruffly. Illumi pouted but did as he was told, allowing Hisoka to pull his hand away so that he could turn. He kept his knees on the floor of the tub and rested his forearms on the edge of the rub, making sure to spread his legs just enough. Water spilled everywhere on the floor, but he didn't care in the slightest.

Hisoka slid his finger back in with ease, this time pumping his hand back and forth, rewarding him soft moans from Illumi.

"Listen to how easily you moan for me."

Illumi bit his lip in defiance.

"That won't do." Hisoka slid another finger into Illumi, making sure to curl his fingers to the right spot where he knew Illumi would feel it.

"Ah.." Illumi sighed.

Hisoka separated his index and middle finger inside Illumi's ass, stretching him and letting Illumi squirm under him.

"Fuck" Hisoka whispered, looking at the sight beneath him.

"Hisoka." Hisoka looked to Illumi's face, which looked back at him from over his shoulder pleadingly.

"Not yet." Hisoka lowered his face to meet Illumi's hole, pressing his tongue inside between his fingers.

"Ah.. Ahh! Hisoka? What- are... oh, fuck." Illumi's back arched down, pressing his ass against Hisoka's face, allowing Hisoka to push his tongue further and swirl it. Illumi gripped his hands into fists. He'd never felt anything like that before, but his body seemed to know what to do. Hisoka's tongue was longer than he ever could have imagined, although he never imagined he would put it in there.

From over his shoulder, he could see Hisoka looking back at him. He could see, no, he could feel Hisoka smiling – into his ass. He was going to have to really kill him later. For now, moaning and gripping on tight was just about all he could manage.

Hisoka pulled away and straightened his back, pulling his hand slowly out of Illumi. Illumi whined in protest, but Hisoka ignored him as he undid his belt and pants, which were heavy with water and tight from pressure built up in his dick. He had to get out of those clothes. At least the outer layer. He set his erection free, letting it bob up and down on top of Illumi as he stripped himself of his jacket and bow tie. Illumi waited impatiently, wiggling his ass back and forth, stroking it against Hisoka's cock. Hisoka let out a small shiver as he watched Illumi work his hips.

"You've become quite the good little slut." Hisoka lowered himself to Illumi's level, lining his cock up to his ass.

"C'mon, c'mon fuck me." Hisoka grabbed Illumi's wet hair and yanked it back as he began sliding himself into Illumi.

"You want this?"

"Fuck! Ahh..." Illumi's voice wavered

"Say it again."

"Fuck me" Illumi grinned. Hisoka thrust himself against Illumi's ass, now completely sheathed in him.

"Fuuuck." Hisoka groaned. Illumi smirked.

"You're okay?" Hisoka asked.

"Mmm" Illumi kept his mouth shut by biting his lip, enjoying the feeling of being absolutely, perfectly filled with Hisoka's cock.

"Don't forget to breathe."

Illumi nodded.

"Fuck, Illumi." Hisoka said before pulling back to exert himself forward again.

Illumi couldn't help but let his body take over, grinding against Hisoka's hips and pulling forward only to force himself back, his mouth wide open, smiling like an idiot. He could hear Hisoka groan as he thrust forward in time with Illumi.

"Shit. Shit." Illumi could hear Hisoka cursing as his hips slapped against Illumi's ass. Water splashed up and out of the tub with each contact.

"Hisoka, fuck me harder."

Illumi felt the tightness on his hair go slack. He looked back only to be forced down by one of Hisoka's arms against the small of his back. His face would have gone into the water had it not been for his own strength keeping him above the bath by holding onto the sides. Hisoka plowed into Illumi's ass like nothing Illumi had ever felt. He tried to silence his moans by holding his breath.

"Breathe." Hisoka panted out from behind him.

Illumi opened his mouth and let his moans carry out into the room, the echoes making the volume of his own voice seem almost unbearable. Hisoka's grunts became louder, and he could tell he was getting close.

"Inside" Illumi said as Hisoka moved his other arm to grab Illumi's torso. Illumi yelped at a sudden sharp feeling against his back. He realized Hisoka was biting him, hard.

Hisoka's thrusts became quicker, more greedy. Illumi felt Hisoka's body buck forward in the final thrust, and he knew Hisoka was filling him up.

Hisoka released his bite on Illumi, the animal in him sated. Illumi felt him pull out and sigh. He turned his head around to look at him. Hisoka's hair was wet and messy, and his body dripped gloriously with sweat and water. His remaining clothes sticking to him. His face was flush. He sat back on his knees and let Illumi get up.

"Illumi, let me... Let me suck you off."

"Let me give you a minute."

Illumi could tell Hisoka was a little relieved. He was tired and spent, and definitely needed more than just a minute. Illumi got out of the tub and grabbed a towel from a rack on the wall.

Hisoka looked up from where he sat in the tub, looking up at Illumi. Without a word, he pulled Illumi's hips towards his face and buried Illumi's dick in his mouth. Illumi gasps gently. If there was something about Hisoka that he admired, it was his resilience. He pulled back, reaching up to prop Illumi's dick in front of his face so he could swirl his tongue around the cock in front of him.

"Oh, god." Illumi watched and was amazed, again, at Hisoka's tongue. Hisoka's flush red cheeks looked so beautiful as his face sucked in more of Illumi. His wet hand twisted has he bobbed his head up and down, twisting it to match the movement of his hand and ever so often swirling his tongue around the tip.

Illumi let his head rock back when Hisoka pushed his cock deep into his throat, soft choking noises came from below and Illumi tried so hard not to grip Hisoka's hair and simply fuck his face. Hisoka got the idea and started moving faster. Illumi gasped and groaned, looking down to see Hisoka's eyes looking up at him. They weren't the gold that he was used to, but it was Hisoka's just the same.

"Fuck.." Illumi muttered. Hisoka jerked Illumi for a few pumps as he breathed, precum dripping devishly from his lips. He smiled and winked at Illumi before going back to town. Illumi couldn't help but thrust lightly into Hisoka's throat, and he loved the soft gurgling coming from him. It was so warm, so wet. Before Illumi knew it, both hands were in Hisoka's hair, gripping tightly as he folded forward, cumming into Hisoka's struggling throat with a groan. He pulled back and out of Hisoka's mouth and sat down on the stool where Hisoka had sat before.

Hisoka's face was even more red now, and he had saliva dripping from his chin.

"Fuck."

"Did you ever think you'd fuck one of your butlers?"

"Fuck off you're not my butler."

They both laughed. Hisoka sighed. Illumi looked around.

"There's water everywhere."

"Yeah among other things."

Illumi smiled, but it soon faded.

"Hisoka, promise me no more secrets."

"From here on out?"

"Yeah."

Hisoka's eyes darted side to side.

"Hisoka?"

"I..."

"You what?"

"Nothing, I love you."

Illumi smiled, Hisoka got up and embraced him, kissing him softly.

~Chapter 12, Fin~

…...Yeah.

Fun fact! I first heard the name Prytania from a song by that name.

…...

Extra:

"Hisoka?"

"What's up Illumi?"

"Is my bite bleeding?"

"What?"

"Where you bit me. Is it bleeding?"

"Lemme take a look turn around.."

"'kay."

"Oh fuck."

"What?! Oh shit am I bleeding? Hisoka!"

"pfft."

"What?"

"The look on your face."

"What about it?"

"It's priceless."

"Dammit Hisoka am I bleeding or not?"

Hisoka dies of laughter, and soon after Illumi kills him for being a little shit. RIP Hisoka (JK he just got a good spanking ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°))


	13. Scheme

It's nearly eleven." Tsubone looked down at Hisoka as she spoke with her hand on her hip. He looked at the floor diligently, not daring to look anywhere else. "The curfew is at nine! And what's worse, look at what you've done to your suit!"

Hisoka's outer garments lay in wet heap on the desk next to him. The coat was stretched at the collar and the fabric ruined. Hisoka's undergarments felt damp and cold against his skin.

"Do I dare ask what on earth happened?"

"Illu- I mean, The Young Master threw me in the bathtub because the water was not to his liking."

Tsubone grunted. "That sounds like something that brat would do. He, his brothers, and his mother are all like that. Their temper tantrums will land you in the worst of places. You'll get used to it."

Hisoka nodded, and kept a smirk to himself at the thought of anyone calling Illumi a brat. It was an accurate description.

Tsubone sighed and let her hand that was resting on her hip fall to her side.

"I will pity you this time because it's your first day, but you will need to watch yourself. No one can protect you from Illumi if he decides to kill you." Tsubone began to turn around. Hisoka muttered something under his breath.

"He wouldn't."

"What was that?" Tsubone snapped.

"I said-" Before Hisoka could lie, Tsubone interrupted him.

"You must think you can handle that man. You must think he won't rip you to bits. Do you not know what terrible monster you've been given to handle?"

Something in Hisoka's curiosity perked up. "Terrible monster, you say?"  
"That man has no regard for human life. He has no remorse and no morals."

"That sounds familiar."

"Yes they're all like that, but do not take this lightly. He doesn't value _any_ life. He values money, power, and the occasional thrill. You're nothing but a butler to him. Disposable, just like the rest of us because his mother taught him to be like that. Silva should have raised him right, but he ended up twisted just like the she-devil who raised him. That's why he's not the heir. Your job here is to make sure he doesn't bring more shame to the family than he already has. If you can't keep that temper of his under control, you're dead for."

"I take it you don't like his mother very much." Hisoka made sure not to use Kikyo's name.

"That wench and her laser eye may be strong, but she's crazy as all hell. She raised some crazy as hell kids to match. The only one worth a spit is Killua, but he's just as rebellious as the rest of them. I don't blame him, though. If my mother was as possessive as his I'd have cut her open and ran away too."

"Tell me more about Illumi."

Tsubone looked at Hisoka with a raised eyebrow. Hisoka realized his question probably sounded off to her. "...So I know what to look out for."

"What to look out for? Well, he's a sociopath. There's no telling what to look out for. Once, he wanted to test some theory for... well, nevermind. It's best I not worry you about that."

"About what?"

"If Silva or his wife wanted you to know everything about this place, they'd have told you already. Every family has secrets. Especially this one. Don't go poking about. Just do your job and try not to get killed."

"All right. So, then what should I do with these?"Hisoka gestured to the wet heap of clothes.

Tsubone grunted. "Give them here. You'll have a new set in your quarters for tomorrow and there's pajamas in your dresser. Try to get some rest, it'll be an early start for you tomorrow."

Hisoka nodded and turned to leave.

"Hiro." Hisoka turned at the sound of his false name.

"I know you think you can handle him, but for everyone's sake, do not provoke him."

Hisoka couldn't help but grin. "I'll try my best not to." Hisoka left to change out of the wet clothes that still clung to him. The door shut behind him and he looked around the room that would be his new living space. It was small, to say the least. There was a small window overlooking the yard in front of the Butler's complex. A line of trees separated his view of most of the main Mansion, where Illumi and his family stayed. He could see the highest few floors and the roof from his window, and Hisoka couldn't help but try to figure out if one of those windows was the one to Illumi's bedroom. He sighed and took another look around the room, ignoring his need to study the window longer.

The door to the restroom was now to his left, it was small but functional. He was worried that he'd have to share a bathroom with someone, but the lavishness of the Zoldycks meant most servants had their own room with their own bathroom. It probably helps keep the servants from falling in love with one another, although not every servant followed that rule. He could tell instantly just how many of them would sneak into another's room every night. Anyone who was caught ended up publicly executed as an example to others. Loyalty was not something the Zoldyck family would dare share in the hearts of their employees, and love was too big of a distraction.

"You're only love shall be for the family and your duty is completely to them" Hisoka mocked the words Tsubone spoke on his first day when she went over the rules. He leaned against the wall and looked at the bed in the corner. It was a full sized twin bed, much smaller than his or Illumi's. He sighed and opened the door to the restroom. To his left, a shower. In front of him, a sink with a decent mirror and off-white counter top. To his right, a matching off-white toilet.

"Off-white, really?" Hisoka couldn't help but sneer. He had to admit it wasn't as bad as what he had to deal with every time the Phantom Troupe would get together back when he was pretending to be with them. It was always in some abandoned building or back alley with no provisions whatsoever. But the thought of having to come back to this room every night was enough to make him groan. It wouldn't be so bad if he got to live with Illumi, but he doubted he could continue breaking curfew without someone eventually questioning about It.

He got in the shower, standard shampoo and conditioner as well as soap but nothing fancy. He'd have to see if he could order something fruitier. Everything smelled so generic. He'd much rather smell like Illumi's soaps. He'd have to ask him for some.

He got out, dried himself and wrapped a towel on his head. He stepped out into his room, naked. At least he could still have his own space to be naked when he wanted to, but he'd have to try to get Illumi and himself out of there as soon as possible. There was no way he could stay here long term.

He looked out the window again, to the family mansion.

The sheets on his bed were not nearly as lavish or soft as his own or Illumi's, and it felt lonelier. He dreamed of a certain spoiled brat with long black hair that night, and was awakened by his alarm, a rude and lonely start.

…...

…...

…...

…...

"Kikyo, I don't like her." Silva sat with his wife in bed. It was morning now, but both of them lay in bed half asleep.

"Well, how can you not like her, you've only met her once."

"That's the problem, we've only actually met her once. Don't you think we're moving a bit to fast for Illumi?"  
"We've already lost enough time, Silva. He's experimented. For all we know we almost lost him. If he doesn't commit and soon we'll never get another chance."

"But c'mon, Kikyo. Even we didn't rush things with our own contract."

"This girl isn't just a baby-maker. She's a tool to push her company's agenda. They might try to use her to get leverage on us. In the contract, I'm sure you've read it, any money Illumi makes, she gets a cut of it. That's how this deal is going through. She's going to use any power she has over him to get him to do what she wants – churn out money. Illumi will be doing job after job if she has her way, which will keep Illumi focused on what's important."

"How can you be so sure?"

"Because It's clear as day. She comes in, has a baby and now she's not just some girl she's the mother of his children and she has a say in what Illumi does and thinks. She won't let him sit around and do nothing if she wants her cash flow to be sound. And with him working, he won't get any time to think about that clown or anyone else for that matter."

Silva sighed. "Have you read through the entire contract?"

"Of course I did."

"Did you read the part about every child eligible will be required to take the Hunter Exam?"

"So? Illumi took the Hunter Exam."

"Under a disguise and only because he needed it to complete a job."

"I'm not seeing your point."

"Why would this company require that our grandchildren take the exam if there's no real need for it?"

"Well they did say they want strong children."

"Then why not do a private test to determine that? Why put them through the Hunter's Association unless the Hunter's Association had something to do with this company?"

"Honey, you're asking questions that don't make sense. The Hunter's Association has nothing to do with this company. Companies like these are the best match-making services for the well-to-do. I'm so happy your father found my company when he did. Could you imagine living by yourself?"

Silva contemplated for a moment. "Perhaps someone to keep him company will do Illumi some good."

"Exactly. We have plenty of time now to get to know her and for her to get to know us, but the sooner Illumi gets acquainted with her the better."

Silva lay back and placed his arms underneath his head on the pillow behind him. "What are we going to do about these kids? I mean I love them to death but Milluki's abilities are all in his head, Kalluto is off being part of some thieves gang, Killua thinks he can run away from family and have friends, and Alluka is probably a demon. Illumi was supposed to be the well-behaved one up until recently."

Kikyo sighed. "They're all perfect. Perfect assassins. Milluki's skills are unprecedented in technology. We'd still be in the dark ages if not for him. Yes, Kalluto made friends with a group of murderous thieves, but he cares for his family above anything else. He's also raking in a hell of a lot of cash for such a small kid. Alluka... needs to be kept in a cage. But, Illumi hasn't always been the 'well-behaved' one. Do you remember that time he caused the deaths of over 60 of our servants?"

"Illumi didn't cause that. Alluka did. Illumi just wanted to know what would happen. He couldn't have predicted the consequences. None of us could have. Besides, it was you who started the whole thing about testing Alluka's abilities."

"My point was that he's not a perfect person, none of them are. Don't expect him to be."

"My father hates what I've raised the children to be. Maybe he's right."

Kikyo furrowed her brows and looked at her husband. "What do you mean?"

"Everything about the code and the rules he sets. All of them break it. Illumi kills people that aren't on the list. He always has, even before his little bout with that clown. He's never cared about sticking to the killings required by the job. Milluki is the same way. You saw what he did to that tourist. Then Kalluto is a part of the Phantom Troupe. It's not exactly assassin's work and he has to split everything with the rest of that troupe he's in. None of these things are what Zeno thinks an assassin should do. These things bring shame to us in his eyes."

"We literally kill people. We're all wanted criminals. All of us have killed very high profile targets. Zeno's narrow thinking is going to make us poor. We can't have high morals. Not in this industry. Or this world for that matter."

"Yes, but I think he's right about one thing. Killing just because it's more convenient isn't what my father wanted for his grandchildren. I think that's why he hasn't looked at Illumi since he got home."

"Hmph." Kikyo crossed her arms. "Zeno hasn't looked Illumi in the eyes because he saw the photo that paparazzi took of him. If he has any other problems with my sons he can bring it up with me."

"Calm down."

"All of them think we have no morals. Your father, your servants: Tsubone and her kind. Hah, I bet even Maha thinks we're doomed. Just because the children make a few mistakes here and there doesn't mean we can't handle it. And who are they to judge us? Your father does literally the same job and Tsubone is nothing more than a servant!"

"Kikyo, I think this is serious, they don't have any idea about what the consequences of their actions are."

"Oh so you're taking their side?!"

"Kikyo, there aren't any sides here, I'm concerned for our kids. I need you to think seriously about this."

"Firstly, I am being serious. Our children are fine. We are fine. They just need some nudges in the right direction and they'll be the best generation of Zoldycks yet." Kikyo got out of bed and stormed off to get ready for the day.

Silva thought for a moment. He turned to lay on his stomach and plant his face in his pillow. "I don't wanna get up."

"Get up!" Kikyo called from their bathroom.

Silva groaned into his pillow before rolling out of bed and joining his wife in the bathroom. Kikyo was brushing her teeth as he came behind her to hug her. She shooed him away.

"Kikyo, I'm sorry."

"No you're not sorry" Kikyo spoke toothbrush still in mouth, making her words sound warbled.

"Kikyo, I just worry about them."

Kikyo leaned forward into the sink to spit. She looked at her husband in the mirror. "And I'm telling you there's no need to worry. If there is a reason to worry about them I'll let you know. I have this under control."

"Okay, baby. You got it under control." Silva hugged Kikyo again and she rolled her eyes.

"Be serious."

Silva laughed. "I am being serious!"

"Then why are you laughing?"

"Because you have toothpaste on your face."

Kikyo smiled and pushed her face onto Silva, smearing toothpaste on his chin.

"There, now you have it on your face too!"

"Gross!"

"Shut up and wipe your face." Kikyo found herself smiling. She thought to herself this was exactly the kind of life she wanted for Illumi. Happiness with his wife in the morning even after arguing. She was doing the right thing, and she had everything under control. Or so she thought.

…...

…...

…...

Hisoka's alarm went off at 5:00 am. He woke up and drudgingly put on his new uniform. After brushing his teeth and combing his hair he made his way out to the common room of the Butler's quarters, where everyone bustled to get to their perspective posts. Hisoka grabbed breakfast and ate quickly before heading to Illumi's room.

The sun hadn't risen, and Illumi was still asleep. Hisoka began fixing a pot of coffee in Illumi's room. The man in the silk sheets behind him stirred awake.

"Hisoka..." Illumi mumbled.

"Good morning, sleepyhead."

"Oh, good. You're making coffee. There's arsenic in the drawer if you need any."

Hisoka laughed. "Unlike you, I'm not going to try to kill you as a sign of affection. I think I'll just add a touch of cinnamon."

Illumi yawned. Hisoka poured two mugs out and handed one to Illumi. They were very plain and had no decoration on them.

"Illumi, maybe we should get you some new mugs."

"Just paint one for yourself if you want it to say 'fuck' so badly."

"No, I want it to say 'Cum-Slut'."

"No, someone's going to have to wash that eventually and I don't want anybody thinking I'm a cum slut."

"Or, you know. We could head over to Heaven's Arena sometime and stay at my apartment there. It's a lot closer than the one in YorkNew. Decorated mugs galore."

"Hisoka, as enticing as Heaven's Arena is, you know I can't leave right now. There's too much going on and too many risk factors. The chances of us getting caught are too high."

"It's on the same continent, we'd be there in a few hours if we take a blimp."

"Hisoka." Illumi said sternly.

"Okay, just a suggestion." Hisoka sipped his coffee.

Illumi looked at Hisoka's eyes and frowned.

"What's wrong?"

"Your contacts. They bother me."

"It's kind of part of the disguise."

"Can't you use texture surprise or something?"

"Yes, but that would take a little more energy and Nen to pull off."

"I want to see your eyes. Your real eyes."

Hisoka stared back at Illumi, slightly surprised at his forwardness.

"Certainly." Hisoka got up and walked over to the bathroom. Illumi waited patiently. When Hisoka came back, his eyes were the golden color Illumi was used to.

"That's better."

"How long has that been bothering you?"  
"Since I saw you yesterday and recognized you."

Hisoka chuckled to himself.

"What's so funny?"

"Nothing, you're just sweet."

"Shut up."

"You know, Tsubone thinks you have one nasty temper. I think I agree with her, what with you throwing me in the bathtub and all."

"I didn't throw you in the bathtub, I pulled you in so we could fuck."

"I know, I was making a joke."

"Oh. She probably does hate me, though."

"Yeah I get that vibe."

"I'm not surprised. She hates my mother too."

"Why's that?"

"I'd rather explain it some other time."

"Allright.." Hisoka sighed. " I think you should get ready for breakfast."

"Do I have to get up, can't I stay in here with you?"

"Your family will start to wonder if all you do is stay in your room all day."

"Fine." Illumi grumbled. He pulled the covers off of him and got out of bed. Hisoka was shocked to see Illumi wearing just a top and underwear. Hisoka had no idea this whole time Illumi wasn't wearing pants. He looked at Illumi's long legs as he walked across the room and smirked.

As Illumi opened a drawer, Hisoka came up from behind him and hugged his waist. "Hold on, maybe just a minute... or twenty." Hisoka whispered into Illumi's ear. Illumi couldn't help but smile and arch back into Hisoka's embrace.

"You are despicable."

"Considering you're the one without any pants I'd say you're the despicable one, flaunting all this..." Hisoka brushed his hands along the side of Illumi's thigh. "How do you expect me to keep my composure?"

Just then, a knock at the door startled the pair away from each other. Hisoka looked at Illumi for a moment. Illumi mouthed at him to answer.

"Who is it?" Hisoka called out.

"Illumi? It's Prytania. I'd like to speak with you about a few things over breakfast."

"Give him just a minute." Hisoka called back before he whispered to Illumi to put his pants on.

"Hisoka?" The mumbled voice from behind the door sounded confused. Hisoka panicked and quickly opened the door to pull Prytania into the room. She was shocked to be so suddenly yanked around, but not as surprised as Illumi was.

"She knows who you are?" Illumi pointed at Prytania but kept his eye on Hisoka.

"She works for the same company Nadiya worked for, so yeah."

"She recognized your voice!" Illumi raised his volume. "Just from a few sentances, Hisoka _she knows_ you!"

"Like I said, she worked for the same company and she's heard my voice before."

"She said your name out loud! What if someone heard her!" Illumi shouted at Hisoka.

"For the record, Nobody ever told me what name you're going by now." Prytania looked between the two of them back and forth.

"Hisoka tell me what's going on!"

"You now, you can talk to me, Illumi. I am here and I can hear you." Prytania was tired of Illumi talking about her like she wasn't there.

"Prytania, how do you know Hisoka?" Illumi finally addressed her.

She looked at Hisoka for a split second. Illumi followed her eyes. His expression became very worried.

"When he was first married to Nadiya, I was stationed in the area around Heaven's arena. Communication for contracts in that region were handled by me, so his and Nadiya's contract fell under my jurisdiction, so to speak."

"I don't understand."

"I oversaw the contracts in that region, meaning I made sure the money flow was sound for each couple and that nobody killed their partners. I also kept tabs on how the children were growing up. The contractors would report to me, so essentially all information Nadiya had on Hisoka was accessible to me at all times, and if he ever had any questions I was his contact. When he moved to York New City, I was stationed there with the police under a new name. Hisoka would have known me as Robyn Taft."

"So will there be someone like you for our family? Someone we'll be able to contact who oversees other couples in this region?"

"Since this region is not very heavily populated unlike York New City, probably not. I'll just report to... a higher up. Listen, I really need to talk things over with you so if you could dress and meet me downstairs, I'd appreciate it."

Prytania turned around and left the room, Illumi looked at Hisoka.

"So where you going to tell me she knew you?"

"I thought you had already figured that out already, I mean you know I had intentions to kill her yesterday."

"Yeah but I didn't know she _knew_ you! What does she know?"  
"Everything."

"Everything? Like what?"

"That you and were a thing during your stay in York New and that I'm pretending to be your butler. She also knows you killed Nadiya and Albert."

Illumi placed both palms of his hands on his face.

" _Why_ does she know all that?"

"Look, she won't tell anyone. She literally doesn't care."

"Right now it might not seem like a big deal but what if she wants me to do something that I don't want to. She's got leverage now! She can out us whenever she want! _Fuck_." Illumi leaned against a wall and pouted.

"Illumi, calm down."

"Why are you not freaking out?"

"Look, just get dressed and see what she wants to talk about."

Illumi let out a deep breath. "Fine. But I'm mad at you."

Hisoka sighed. "Fine, but I'm still kinda horn-"

"Don't even say it."

...

…...

…...

Illumi joined Prytania for breakfast. The waiting staff served their food while Hisoka maintained his still posture against the wall, hands behind his back making sure to keep out of the way for the other butlers.

"Thank you for meeting with me. I was hoping we could discuss what exactly assassin training entails." Illumi motioned for the other butlers to leave their side. They quietly moved out of the room and shut the door silently behind them. Hisoka studied how they never look up long enough to make eye contact with either Illumi or anyone else in the room.

"Forgive me if I look like we're being secretive. I don't mind telling you, but I want to know why you're asking."

Prytania sipped from her tea cup. Her posture was as straight and dainty as ever. She moved like she was made of porcelain, gently setting down her cup into its saucer before speaking. "If I am to raise children here, I want to know what they will be forced to endure starting at the age of six."

Illumi leaned back in his chair. "Well, for starters, all of us, my brothers and I, started training from birth, not from the age of six. Training is all we've ever known. Even now, when we're not working we train. When we're not training we rest and plan out our next training session. We learn and do research, and then we fight to hone our abilities. Tolerance is the first thing we build; tolerance to pain and poisons. From there we build strength. Physical and Mental fortitude is a must. Once that is in place we drill as much as we can. We teach strategizing and coping. We learn to disregard emotion and remorse. We learn to value the family and trust no one else."

"Do you not trust me?"

"To be frank, no. We don't trust you, but my mother believes she can use you to get something that she wants, so she's fine with it."

"Thank you for being honest with me." Illumi nodded to her smile. She continued, "The training sounds arduous.." Illumi noticed the water swelling in Prytania's eyes. She refused to frown, even now. She smiled and turned her face away from Illumi to look out the window. It was morning, but the sun hid behind clouds, casting grey hues on the garden right outside.

"You know, sooner or later someone's going to poison you." Illumi spoke softly.

"Excuse me?" Prytania turned to look at Illumi. He could see on her face where she had let a few tears onto her face, but now she seemed concerned for her own wellbeing not to worry about her appearance.

"You don't have a tolerance to poisons. You'll need the basics."

"I don't think that'll be necessary, I mean It's not like I'll be an actual assassin."

"You may not be an actual assassin, but sooner or later someone's going to find out that one of the Zoldyck children is marrying. If you want to live a long life at all you'll need at least some training."

Prytania looked at Illumi, and then to Hisoka, who looked at Illumi. Illumi looked back at Hisoka and then to Prytania, who had also moved her gaze back to Illumi.

"Prytania," Illumi started, "We kill a lot of high-profile targets. I'm sure your company knows this. They wouldn't have sent you if they didn't think you'd not be able to handle a little training with us."

Prytania swallowed but said nothing.

"Oh, and about one other thing." Illumi leaned close to Prytania and whispered in her ear. "If you say anything to my parents about Hisoka, I'll wear your innards like a stole."

Illumi smiled as he leaned back, but it quickly faded when he saw Prytania's angered expression.

"You honestly think you're in any position to threaten me?"

Illumi heard a click from underneath the table. Prytania saw Illumi's eyes dart up above her head and she felt a presence behind her.

"I believe it's time for Illumi to take his leave." Hisoka spoke from behind Prytania. She could feel something sharp against her neck. Hisoka's breath felt sickly on the side of her face. Her gut twisted with sudden anxiety as she felt the sheer bloodlust oozing from the two men around her.

"All right, I can see hostility will get me nowhere, but you'll want to let me speak my peace." Illumi and Hisoka stayed silent. Prytania sighed.

"If you kill me right now what would you tell your parents? That you didn't like me? They already think you have a problem with women."

"What my parents think of me doesn't matter."

"Oh really? So you're okay with me telling your parents about your... hobbies?" Prytania watched Illumi's expression. He was always able to stay so calm, so cold, but even now she knew he was not comfortable. "This whole thing you're doing, opting for the traditional method, if you really don't care what they think, why bother?"

Illumi's seemingly impeccable emotionless façade slowly crumbled as he began to frown.

"Illumi Zoldyck I don't care if you're in the closet. I'm here to do my job and what you do with your free time is none of my concern, but if you think for just one second that I'm disposable you're wrong. You'll not get another agent like me if you kill me. You and your family will be put on the blacklist for killing an agent. You won't get another chance like this."

"And if I send you home?"

"Honestly you're lucky you got stuck with me. Any other agent would have turned Hisoka in already. For killing his wife and all."

"Hisoka didn't kill his wife."

"And you think they'd believe he didn't? They've probably issued a manhunt already. If I don't say anything, eventually they're going to find Hisoka and someone's going to want to send him back to Yorknew. Everyone will know why he was hiding out here."

"You seem pretty sure of yourself, for someone who was crying about assassin training not even thirty seconds ago."

"I might weep for my future children but you'll never see me break from something as silly as an idle threat."

"You think I won't kill you?"

"I know you won't kill me. There are too many variables, and I know your type. You're not reckless. You're calculating and methodical, and if you stopped for one second to think about exactly what would happen if you tried to get rid of me you'd see that it's in your favor to keep me around."

Illumi was very visibly not happy. Prytania felt whatever sharp object Hisoka had in his hand move away from her neck. She felt the magician's bloodlust subside and his presence slink away to Illumi's side.

"What do you want?" Illumi cocked his head to the side.

"I just want to do my job. I'm here to be your wife and the mother of your kids. This is not a friendship or anything more than a business deal. I want your full cooperation. No more threats on my life, and everything can go much more smoothly from here on out."

Illumi crossed his arms. "Fine, but you do have to get trained to build up your tolerance."

"I can do that."

"Then we're good?"

"I think we're good. My things should be arriving by this evening, along with an officiant. We'll be married by sundown." Prytania dabbed her mouth and set her napkin down on the table. "As for you, Hisoka: You better make sure you know what you're doing. You're a Class A liar and everyone with a brain can see it. I hope for your sake you don't do anything stupid to get yourself killed."

"Why do you care what happens to me?" Hisoka smirked.

Prytania stood and smoothed out the skirt of her dress. She inhaled gently. "If I'm honest with myself you're the closest thing I have to a friend here. I've known you for a while and I know how you work. If you're supposed to be Illumi's personal servant now, my guess is when we're married you'll be serving me, too. I can't have anything happen to me and my future husband's personal servant, now can I?"

Illumi's eyes darted between Prytania and Hisoka. Hisoka frowned, but Prytania had the smallest hint of a smile.

"Thank you for joining me for breakfast. I'll be discussing things with your head butler regarding the whole poison tolerance thing. Hopefully I can get this done without interrupting my general fertility."

Illumi exhaled as Prytania gently bowed her head before leaving the room.

"So I see you're making friends."

"For the record I don't consider her my friend."

"You defended her."

"Pardon?"

"When I asked you if I should send her away you told me not to because of what would happen to her. You protected her."

"She has potential."

"That's not the only reason you're keeping her around. Why did she know your voice?"

"I already told you she's known me for-"

"She knew it was you from the other side of a two inch mahogany door. You tried to kill her in the hallway but something happened. You changed your mind and now you're protecting her. You're hiding something from me, Hisoka."

Hisoka's heart beat quickly in his chest. Illumi was staring up at him from his chair, his expression serious. Hisoka stepped around the chair and sat in front of Illumi where Prytania was sitting before.

"We slept together. Once."

"When?"

"Illumi, you-"

"I asked, _When?"_

"Last night." Hisoka looked directly at Illumi. His brows furrowed.

"When last night?"

Hisoka sighed. "You told me to get out, Illumi I figured you didn't want me around anymore."

"You slept with her while I was in the bathtub and then slept with me?"

"I didn't think you'd take me back!"

"But you slept with her and then slept with me! Maybe I would have avoided you if I knew you were fucking around with my future wife!"

"She was crying and upset and I was feeling pretty fucking bad too so yeah we slept together but we both agreed it didn't mean anything."

"Why did you think that would be okay?"

"I thought I was leaving! I really thought you were kicking me out and that we were over!"

"Then why did you come back to my room?"

"I wanted to say goodbye!"

"Oh and bathtub sex is just your way of saying farewell?"

"You started saying things!"

"And at not one point did you think to tell me about what you were just doing?"

"I- no! I just thought about how happy I was to have you back I wasn't thinking about her in any way!"

"This isn't about her! This is about you hiding things from me- Again!"

"I didn't think it was important enough to tell you!"

"It is important! Did you even use protection?"

"I- no we didn't"

"And what do you think I'm going to have to do tonight?"

"What?"  
"I have to fuck her sometime tonight and now all I'm going to think about is whether or not the current face she's making is something you liked."

Hisoka sighed. "I didn't want to tell you because of that."

"No, you didn't want to tell me because you don't want me to skin you alive. You were just protecting yourself."

"I just got you back, Illumi!" Hisoka reached and grabbed Illumi's hands. Illumi pulled away.

"Don't do that, please. Illumi, don't pull away from me. Not again."

"And what if I do tell you to leave, hm? You gonna go find someone else to shag? Is that what I can always expect from you?"

"If you tell me you don't want me anymore I'll be gone. I'm not here to force myself on you. I wanted us to leave, Illumi. I wanted us to grab your things and get the hell out of here but right now Prytania has her claws around your entire life."

"And you told me not to make her leave!"

"Do you think the contract starts when you say 'I Do?' Illumi, the contract started when your parents responded to their offer! They won't let her live and they won't let your family off the hook if you leave now. They'll just send another poor girl who won't be as accommodating as our Prytania here. Any other agent would have killed or reported me already! Like it or not we lucked out with getting her!"

"How is this in any way lucky? I still have to marry someone that isn't you!"

Hisoka's voice caught in his throat as he watched Illumi's eyes water and his nostrils flare. Hisoka could see Illumi was hurt, and angry, and so pitifully in love with him.

"You wouldn't want to marry me anyway."

"You're right I wouldn't. But now I can't even if I wanted to." Illumi wiped his face with the back of his hand like a child pretending not to cry. "It's not fair."

Hisoka reached his hand out to Illumi's shoulder, offering comfort. Illumi swatted him away.

"What's the point, Hisoka? We'll never be able to be together. Not really."

"Not as long as we're in this house."

"Well we can't just leave!"

"Maybe now we can't, but you'll have a wife soon. Children to raise."

"I'm not following you."

"Your mother wants you to appear normal, she doesn't really care about raising the next generation of assassins that won't even be heirs to the Zoldyck family business, does she?"

"Well, I-"

"And Prytania doesn't want your mother raising her kids, either. You saw how she cried when you talked about exactly what assassin training is."

"You think my mother would let me move out with Prytania?"

"Not without a butler to keep a close eye on you."

"But what butler?"

"A handsome one named Hiro who your mother entrusted your life to."

"This is your plan? For the three of us to just leave?"

"At the right time."

"And what is the right time?"

"I'm not sure. Whenever Prytania has the most leverage against your Mother."

"So now we're using Prytania?"

"Well, she's using you just the same. It's only fair we give That Witch the same treatment." Just then the door opened from behind them. Prytania stood in the frame of it, leaning against the dark wood and smiling.

"I'll have the most leverage over your mother once I have a baby." Prytania's voice seemed triumphant, and all-knowing.

"So you're into eavesdropping." Hisoka smirked as he spoke.

"Of course. How else will I ever know what people say about me behind my back?" Prytania smirked back.

Illumi exhaled as if to rid himself of whatever resentment he was building up against his fiancee. Her smile this time was closed mouth and although genuine, still annoying. "So are you with us?" Illumi directed his question at the woman in the door frame.

"Hey just like Hisoka said, as long as I get the results I want I don't care what you two do. And I won't pass up an opportunity to get out of here and away from your mother. No offense."

"None taken, she's crazy."

"In the meantime I guess we'll be stuck here for at the very least Nine months." Hisoka's voice seemed weary at the prospect of being in the mansion for so long. The other two in the room silently agreed.

"We'll have at least nine months to decide where we want to go." Prytania chimed.

Illumi looked at Hisoka. "We can't go to heaven's arena with a newborn."

Hisoka placed his thumb on his lip in thought. "My apartment in Yorknew isn't exactly baby-safe but-"

"We can't go there either. It's in a different country on a different continent that's too far away and Mother will think I'm going to see you. She'd veto that idea from the start." Illumi crossed his arms.

"How about Zaban City?" Hisoka spoke like a light bulb turned on in his head.

"It's a prosperous city, that's for sure." Prytania spoke cautiously, waiting for Hisoka to speak again.

"Again, different country and different continent. Mother won't be happy with me trying to leave so far away. So why Zaban City in particular?" Illumi questioned.

"It's in the contract that your kids are going to have to take the Hunter Exam anyway, right?" Hisoka's voice seemed mildly excited.

"That's correct."

"Zaban City was the cite of our exam and it's on the same continent as the Hunter Selection Committee Hotel. It's almost guaranteed the exam will take place in that region again in the future. If you push that part of the contract to Illumi's mother about the Hunter Exam, would you be able to convince her that you want to live in Zaban City to train Illumi's kids for the exam?"

"I mean, yeah?"

"Then Zaban is our best bet." Hisoka beamed with excitement.

"I'm not sure if she'd go for-" Illumi started, but stopped when he noticed Prytania getting excited too.

"Even if she is upset that it's so far away, we'd be taking a butler with us!" Prytania exclaimed.

"She already expects me to report on your actions." Hisoka chimed.

"Then you'll have to report that we are discussing a move before we ever bring it to her." Illumi chewed on his lip as he thought. Hisoka was quick to question.

"Why?"

Illumi smiled. "If she thinks she knows about what we're plotting before we ever come to her she'll think she's in control. So once Prytania is confirmed pregnant, you'll go to mother and tell her Prytania and I are planning to leave once the baby is born. That way when we do come to her and let her know it won't come as a surprise and she won't freak out as badly. She'll be calm and susceptible to reason."

"So then you better hurry up and get me pregnant." Prytania said, playfully, but by the reaction she got from both Hisoka and Illumi she could tell it didn't come off as a joke.

"Yeah." Illumi muttered.

The three of them stood in silence for a moment. Prytania nodded before speaking again. "Until Zaban City, then. We'll not speak of this again. We can't risk other eavesdroppers finding out about this."

"You're right." Illumi sighed. "So we all know the plan. As soon as Prytania is confirmed pregnant, Hisoka you tell Mother about your 'intel,' and then when the child is born we approach mother with the notion to leave."

"It's going to be a long year." Hisoka groaned.

"Hisoka, or should I say Hiro, you have to make curfew every night. No slip-ups."

"How did you know I didn't make curfew?" Hisoka sounded slightly impressed.

"You left my room at Nine-thirty."

"Ah." Hisoka scoffed.

Illumi didn't bother looking up at either one of them. "So are you two done then?"

"There won't be a repeat of last night if that's what you're asking." Prytania answered.

"There better not be." Illumi glared at Hisoka sideways.

"Now I think I'll really go talk to someone about this whole poisoning thing. You two better hurry up I hear Illumi has a tight schedule today. Supposed to be getting married or something."

"Should we do something?" Illumi asked suddenly, stopping Prytania from leaving. "I mean, this seems so unceremonious."

"You want ceremony? Won't you be getting enough of that when you, I don't know, Marry me?" Prytania's tone was sharp and unrelenting, unlike her higher-pitched polite voice she used in front of Illumi's parents. Hisoka thought it was amusing and couldn't help but softly chuckle to himself.

"I mean for all of us. We're in some kind of truce right? Working together, counting on each other and such. I just- Is this what having friends is like?"

Prytania and Hisoka suddenly felt the depravity of Illumi's upbringing. He really had never had friends other than Hisoka, but Hisoka ended up being his lover. Illumi truly had never had friends before. Clients, sure. Acquaintances, many. But both Prytania and Hisoka knew now Illumi had no separation between what makes a person an Ally and a Friend.

"I'm-" Prytania started, sighed and searched her words for a moment. "Illumi, we're acting on a mutually beneficial plan, I'll be your legal wife, and in this case your ally. I'm not yet your friend. If you want to be-"

"It's fine. This is just business, right?" Illumi was used to just business. He could handle just business.

"Yes." Prytania answered with a relieved exhale.

"Okay then. See you."

"See you." Prytania left the room, leaving Hisoka and Illumi alone once again.

"Well, Illumi," Hisoka began, "She is right, you have a packed schedule. We'll have to hurry to get you through your morning practice."

Illumi nodded. Hisoka followed him to the gymnasium, all the while thinking on his own deprived childhood compared to Illumi's. He himself had such a tragically comical past, it was no wonder he ended up with the issues that he had. Always wanting, no, needing to find the best fighter. Always looking for potential. Illumi was different. So different. Illumi was not damaged, so to say, but he was not equipped. Hisoka wondered what Illumi could have become if he hadn't come along and showed him how to be more social.

"A perfect Killer." Hisoka didn't realize he spoke aloud.

"Hm?" Illumi turned from where he walked in front of Hisoka. "Did you say something?"

"Oh, no. Nothing at all." Hisoka smiled. Illumi offered a small smile back before turning back around and continuing the walk to the gym. It was going to be a long day, and a longer year still.

...

...Chapter 13, Fin...

...


	14. Dirty Dancing

"Love- love is strange-" Music echoed against the hard walls of the gym. Hisoka sang along as he watched Illumi attack dummies with his needles. Without missing a beat, Illumi flawlessly aims and executes shots at his targets. Mechanical dummies move behind him at inhuman speeds.  
"Lot of people~ take it for a game."  
Illumi doesn't have to look to know what's behind him. He ducks as an axe is thrown his direction. He doesn't miss the opportunity of his motion to attack. His arm extends and his fingers release three needles. Each one lands on a target on the dummy in perfect order – one lined up under the other.  
"Once you get it, you'll never wanna quit."  
A trap door opens underneath Illumi's feet. He's already in the air mid-flip before he can fall, right in the trajectory of two shuriken.  
"After you've had- it, you're in an awful fix."  
Illumi bends his body ever so gracefully, avoiding a clash and zooming past the blades. He lands next to a dummy with a mace, swinging it above it's head. Easy work for an assassin like Illumi. A couple quick jabs and it's done.  
"Many people- Don't understand. They think Love- is money in the hand."  
Another Arrow hits the wall where Illumi was standing. Any normal person wouldn't have been able to see Illumi dodge it, he moved like a quick shadow of himself; too fast to follow.  
"You're sweet lovin'- is better than a kiss."  
Illumi appeared again behind the dummy shooting arrows. Another target down, but there was more coming. Three more whirred behind him, coming in for an attack. Again Illumi's figure disappeared.  
"When you leave me- sweet kisses I'll miss."  
Almost impossible to see, even for Hisoka, Illumi speedily takes care of his targets. One down. Two down. The last one is fast. Illumi dodges a hatchet.  
"Oh, Silvia!" Hisoka calls out, still going along with the song.  
"Yes, Mickey?" Illumi calls back, also playfully singing the words. Hisoka is surprised for a moment that Illumi even knows the words, but not long enough to distract him from continuing his karaoke-type word for word rendition.  
"How do you call your loverboy?"  
Illumi lands the final strike on the third target, and it whirrs for a moment before stopping, but the music continues. Illumi looks at Hisoka. "Come 'ere, lover boy!" He curls a commanding finger at Hisoka.  
Hisoka can't help but grin. "And if he doesn't answer?"  
"Ohh, loverboy!" Illumi smiles, just a little.  
"And if he STILL doesn't answer?" Hisoka raises an eyebrow.  
"I simply say, Baby- Ohh, baby, my sweet baby, you're the one." Hisoka's heart flutters at hearing Illumi's voice moan in tune with the song. Mechanical whirring starts up again, but this time Illumi is looking right at Hisoka. Illumi's dark eyes call out to Hisoka, beckoning him to join in. Hisoka moves forward as he sings the next lyric with Illumi.  
"Baby, Ohh baby, my sweet baby, you're the one."  
Hisoka and Illumi stand at the center of the training floor. The sensors beep as the music plays on, recognizing a second person has entered onto the floor.  
Ten dummies approach them, each with a different weapon, all faster than the ones before them. Hisoka and Illumi stand in front of each other, staring as the dummies approach. The guitar in the music picks up, and Illumi smiles.  
As the dummies are upon them, both of them are already on the attack. They take them out easily, making quick work of them. Needles and deadly sharp cards flying through the air, hitting targets left and right. Within seconds the dummies are all down and another fifteen replace them. Illumi and Hisoka jump and spin and dodge and attack. Sharp blades miss them as they dance across the floor, not a single hit landing on them. Trap doors open, keeping them both light on their feet, and like graceful dancers they fly through the air.  
Another twenty, another dance. Their backs to each other as the automatons surround them. They come for the duo in the center, each with a new weapon and varying movement ability. Hisoka and Illumi don't miss a beat. Dummy heads roll. Hisoka decides it's fun, although he'd love it more if they would bleed and scream. Nothing beats the satisfaction of killing a person, especially not these dummies.  
Finally, the last dummy falls and Hisoka and Illumi meet in the middle of the dummy heap, gasping for breath. The adrenaline is almost too much for Hisoka, his bloodlust piqued but not sated. llumi tugs on Hisokas pants, making it worse.  
The music fades out.  
"C'mon." Illumi begs.  
"Right here?"  
Hisoka pulls Illumi in close and bites his neck. Illumi's sweat and gasps throw Hisoka's senses into a heightened state. The music dies down as it comes to an end. Mechanical whirring starts up again.  
"No, let's move out of the combat training floor otherwise the dummies will just keep coming."Illumi manages to be heard even with Hisoka biting into the side of his neck.  
"Got it." Hisoka gets up and starts walking to the edge of the gym where the free weights are kept. Illumi follows. The sensors beep and the whirring stops.  
As soon as they're off the floor, Illumi jumps Hisoka, pushing him back onto a wall and kissing him hard. Hisoka stops the music player, allowing the sounds of their desperate gasps and their ravenous kissing fill the room and bounce off the walls. Hisoka likes that Illumi is taking charge, and he goes along. He presses his hips up against Illumi's, and finds delightfully that Illumi is just as hard as he is. He wonders if Illumi has the same desire to kill, and if mornings spent here training left him frustrated. Hisoka smiles.  
"What?" Illumi asks between lip smacks.  
"Nothing."  
Hisoka notes that Illumi has finally learned to grind back with just as much enthusiasm as he's met with. Illumi scratches his nails down Hisoka's chest as he reaches for the bottom of his new butler's shirt. Hisoka realizes he's wearing his uniform and breaks away from Illumi's kiss to take his outer jacket off. He watches Illumi's eyes stare hungrily back at him. His face is flush, probably because of all the movement he just did on the gym's dummy training floor, but he looks downright sinful with his half-lidded eyes and teeth gently biting down on his lower lip. Hisoka makes quick work of his button-down as Illumi undoes his belt. Hisoka silently cursed this absurd uniform for having so many obstacles to get through. Once Hisoka is free, Illumi bites Hisoka's collar hard. Hisoka winces, but loves the sensation. Illumi moves further down, biting and scratching until he's on his knees, holding Hisoka's dick up to his face with one hand, and his other between his own legs.  
"Hungry, are we?" Hisoka chuckled for a moment, but as Illumi took him into his mouth, Hisoka stood there, back to the wall, looking down at Illumi with awe. Illumi was already getting better at this, and Hisoka smiled, reminding himself silently to take credit for this progress. His thoughts quickly left him when Illumi slowly ran his tongue flat against the bottom of Hisoka's shaft. Hisoka stared down into deep black eyes looking back up at him. Illumi took Hisoka back into his mouth and sucked, hollowing his cheeks like a pro.  
"Fucking hell." Hisoka groaned.  
Illumi bobbed his head back and forth, his neck moving with the motions. The obscene sucking noises: the pops and slurps made Hisoka feel even more lightheaded. He couldn't help but groan as Illumi worked, and he reached his hand to fist the back of Illumi's hair. It was so much- the sensation of already being out breath combined with absurd amount of his blood currently in his dick, he felt he could die right now and be happy to do so. His head nodded back and he sighed, it was all so much.  
Hisoka thought he was getting close, but suddenly the sensation of Illumi's warm, wet mouth was replaced by the cold still air. He looked down to see Illumi looking behind his shoulder with wide eyes.  
"What is it?"  
"Someone's at the door."Illumi spoke in a whisper.  
"What?"  
Before Hisoka could say anything else, Illumi had thrown him behind a stack of weights. Hisoka landed on his back, and thankfully not on his dick, but he groaned as the air left his lungs for a moment. Hisoka grunted and Illumi quickly shushed him before he stood up just as the door's knob turned and the door opened with a clang.  
"Kalluto! You're back?" Illumi panted.  
"Well of course, brother dearest. I heard you're getting married tonight. I couldn't miss it for the world."  
"Of course. So, Mom called you?"  
"I imagine it was her who asked, but Milluki called to tell me."  
"I see. Well, glad you're home safe. The phantom troupe is treating you well?"  
"Small talk has never been your strong suit. Tell me, why are you still here? Normally you'd be out of the gym by now. It's my turn to train."  
"I didn't know you were back."  
Hisoka held his breath and hid his aura, hoping Kalluto hadn't already picked up on it. He laid there watching Illumi closely. Silence stilled the air further, until Kalluto finally spoke.  
"Did you get beat by the dummies? My, brother you must be slipping. Maybe you do need a little extra time with the dummies."  
"What? No, not at all."  
"Then why is your lip swollen?"  
Illumi instinctively touched his lip, and he winced at the feel of it. He glanced just for a second at Hisoka, but when he looked back at Kalluto he could tell his brother had followed his eyes.  
"Is there someone behind there?"  
"What? No. Pfft."  
"Are- are you? Don't tell me you're already sleeping with her!"  
"I- uh… What?"  
"God, Illumi I never pinned you for such a pervert. Is she there behind the weights?" Kalluto leaned forward as if trying to peer over the stack of thick black weights.  
Illumi stuttered and held out his hands, getting Kalluto to stop where he was. "Yes! Yes. Sorry please don't look she's… indecent" Illumi glanced over at Hisoka who struggled to pull up his pants without being seen.  
Kalluto nodded. "So I'm guessing she's just as nasty as you are. Not a proper lady at all. She's perfect for you."  
Hisoka grasped his mouth shut, holding in his laughter. Illumi held a mostly straight face.  
"Don't.. insult her?" Illumi sounded unsure of his words at first. He cleared his throat and repeated himself. "Don't insult her, this is entirely on me."  
"Fine. I'll meet you properly when you're not… canoodling with my brother. Prytania, was it?" Kalluto raised his voice, addressing who he thought was Illumi's fiancee.  
Now Illumi's straight face faltered as he looked worriedly at Hisoka.  
Hisoka looked side to side trying to think of what to do.  
"Was I mistaken?" Kalluto called out.  
"No!" Hisoka mustered up a high-pitched voice. "Prytania is right."  
Illumi sighed a breath of relief. Hisoka's 'girl voice' seemed convincing enough.  
"Well, Mother sure knows how to pick them." Kalluto's face proclaimed judgment on Prytania's character. He paused before addressing Illumi again. "Don't hog the gym. And don't stain anything!"  
"Got it. Thank you, Kalluto. Glad you're home... I guess." Illumi squinted.  
"…yeah this is weird okay I'm leaving. Make sure you get a butler to sanitize this place afterwards." Kalluto turned about-face and left the room.  
Hisoka threw his head back and held his face in his hands as he laughed boisterously. "Fuckin- what?" Hisoka managed to spit out the words before continuing his laugh.  
"That was close." Illumi ran his fingers through his hair, brushing away hair that he only now noticed had been sticking to his face with sweat.  
"That was funny. Holy shit." Hisoka wiped his forehead. "Phew!"  
"Not to me! What if he found out?"  
"He didn't. I'm just- oh my god that was crazy."  
"Shut up. Put on your shirt"  
"Wait what?"  
"We can't stay here."  
"Aw, but c'mon!"  
Illumi smirked. "That good, huh?"  
Hisoka grinned at Illumi and raised an eyebrow. "I'd give it a B+"  
"You didn't sound or look like you'd give it a B+." Illumi accused smugly.  
"Well I mean that's a pretty high score for an interrupted blow job." Hisoka chuckled.  
Illumi stepped over to Hisoka, who still lay on the floor of the gym, elbows propping him up. Illumi leaned over him.  
"Put your shirt on so we can go back to my room and finish."  
Hisoka smiled and ran his tongue on his teeth just thinking about it. "Whatever you say, 'Master Illumi'."

….  
Kalluto walked down the hall, scoffing to himself. The nerve of his brother, really. How starved for affection was Illumi to take his soon-to-be bride right there in the gym when he was supposed to be doing his morning training? Kalluto couldn't help but judge this so-called Prytania all over again. What kind of mail-order-bride behaves so unprofessionally? Besides, wasn't it bad luck to see the bride before the wedding or something? And hadn't Illumi just met her yesterday? Kalluto's thoughts swirled, but he stopped when he sensed something familiar – an aura. It was gone as soon as he sensed it. He swore he had sensed it earlier, too. It was so vaguely familiar and so foreign. He turned around and headed down the hallway, trying to find it. There was no use, every trace of it was gone. Kalluto sighed and thought to himself maybe he was going crazy. Before he could head back the way he came, he saw a blonde woman walking down the hall in a flowy dress.  
"You there, servant!"Kalluto yelled.  
The woman continued to walk.  
"Excuse me, I'm addressing you!" Kalluto called out again, louder this time. The lady turned around, appearing confused. Kalluto walked up to her with a scowl on his face.  
"Why aren't you in uniform? Didn't Gotoh or Tsubone give you a set to wear for your first day?" Kalluto was shorter than the woman, but he still commanded a greater presence. Prytania looked down at him, and after a moment of studying his Japanese-style clothing, realized who he was.  
"Oh, you must be Kalluto." The woman reached her hand out in greeting. Kalluto looked at her warily. "I'm Prytania. I'm sorry I haven't been introduced to you properly. I'm sure this is not how you imagined meeting me at all."  
"Uh, yeah that was quite the meeting."  
"Well as you may already know I'm already acquainted with the rest of the family, but I haven't met you yet so this is a pleasure! I didn't expect to run into you like this in the hall."  
Kalluto tilted his head and blinked at her. He realized she still had her hand extended, and he grasped her hand to shake it, but gave her side-eye while doing so.  
"Yes, well I know just how well you are acquainted with my brother."  
"Pardon?"  
"Uh, you're going to be my sister-in-law by tonight, so.."  
"So..?"  
"Nothing. You and Illumi seem well matched for having just met yesterday."  
"Thank you?" Prytania's brows furrowed even further. Kalluto avoided eye contact.  
"Well, see you around." Kalluto let go of her hand before leaving her there, bewildered in the hall.

…  
Hisoka groaned and held on to Illumi. Both his legs were thrown over illumi's shoulders and his back pressed against the wall in Illumi's bedroom. Illumi plowed into Hisoka, and Hisoka gasped each time he hit the right spot, driving him mad. He wanted nothing more to tell him how good it felt, how much he loved getting wrecked, but each breath was saved for gasping, attempting to breathe and he had no room for speech.  
"What's the matter? You're not being chatty today." Illumi teased. All Hisoka could do in response was whine. Illumi smiled.  
"Good. I like you better this way." Illumi sped up his pace, and Hisoka moaned and whined all the more.  
"Fuuuuuuck~" Hisoka managed to sigh the word as Illumi screwed him there, pinned to the wall. Hisoka knew Illumi was strong, but actually feeling the force of him over and over again while he held his weight seemed like something Hisoka had dreamed up in his wildest fantasies. He loved it. He loved every bit of it. The aggression and lewdness of it all. Illumi without restraint was decidedly Hisoka's new favorite.  
The expression on Illumi's face was priceless, and Hisoka stared right into it, savoring the image. So determined, so concentrated. Hisoka was right there, right at the edge, but he could tell Illumi was closer.  
Illumi's face became a picture of ecstasy as he grew closer to finish. His movements became erratic and less methodical. Hisoka could only hold on.  
Illumi pressed his hands against the wall on either side of Hisoka, bracing himself for the wave of pleasure, holding Hisoka against the wall with the rest of his body as he tried desperately to be as deep inside him as physically possible.  
Illumi's furrowed brows and closed eyes looked like art in Hisoka's eyes. He came hard and Hisoka moaned again as he felt the heated pressure build up inside him.  
Illumi gasped for a moment, catching his breath. He placed his hands under Hisoka and carried him to his bed, laying him down to pull out and away from him. He smiled when he saw Hisoka dripping with his cum.  
"Damn." Illumi sighed and laid down next to Hisoka, who took to finishing himself off.  
"Illumi," Hisoka said softly. Illumi faced Hisoka. "Watch me."  
Hisoka stroked and fingered himself, all the while maintaining eye contact with Illumi. He cursed under his breath as he came. Illumi smiled as he watched.  
They both laid on the bed, now staring at the ceiling.  
"Still say B+?"  
"Nah. You're definitely a grade A fuck."  
Illumi couldn't help but laugh. "Good. I tried not to hold back too much."  
"I could tell, holy fuck."  
"Sorry, did I hurt you?"  
"No, you're fine I can take it. In fact, don't ever hold back with me. That was perfect."  
"Perfect?"  
"Yeah. You're perfect."  
They stared at each other for a moment, Illumi's pale skin turning a soft pink. Everything about him was beautiful.  
"Fuck I can't wait till you're mine." Hisoka whispered.  
"I'm already yours."  
"I know, but I mean when you're really mine. All mine. When we don't have to sneak around anymore."  
"Aw, come on I know you had fun sneaking around today, you sick freak."  
"Yeah I'm not gonna lie the thrill was exciting, but I want you all to myself. I want you to really not hold back."  
"If I did that, we'd have destroyed property on our hands."  
The two of them laughed for a moment, thinking about all the harm they could do together. Hisoka's smile was the first to fade.  
"Tonight, you're gonna be with her."  
Illumi exhaled. "You know it won't mean anything. I'll be thinking about you the entire time."  
"For some reason that sentence isn't at all comforting."  
"Now you know how I feel. Besides, you fucked her first."  
"Not fair to bring up right now."  
"Maybe you shouldn't have slept with her then."  
"I know that now, but being bitter about it isn't helping the mood."  
Illumi crossed his arms.  
"Hisoka?"  
"What?"  
"I have no idea what to do with a woman."  
Hisoka breathed deep.  
"Just ask her what to do."  
"I don't want to do that. I just want to get it over with."  
"Okay, well… if she's anything like Nadiya, and trust me she is, she's been trained to deal with men like you."  
"Men like me?"  
"Virgins."  
Illumi scoffed. "Thanks to you I'm hardly a virgin."  
"What I mean, is you've never been with a woman."  
"Yeah I know I was just making a joke."  
Hisoka sighed.  
"You can take something to make you… make you hard again."  
"I'm not drinking any of that Spanish shit."  
"Hah. No I'm serious. There's pills you can take that will make you hard for some time without causing death. No matter if you like it or not, you'll be able to get it done and you skip the trip to the emergency room."  
"What if I don't like it?"  
"It doesn't matter, does it? You're stuck in this. You have to get her pregnant if you want us to have any chance of getting out of here."  
Illumi sighed, "That's kind of disgusting."  
"Well, that's where we are."  
Illumi looked over to his clock on the wall next to the door.  
"It's already past noon. I need to shower."  
"Can I join you?"  
"Please do."  
"What, do I stink?"  
"Probably. I'm all sweaty too, but I just want a round two."  
Hisoka raised an eyebrow.  
"Someone's eager today."  
"Maybe I'm just nervous. Fuck me, will you?"  
"Gladly."

…..

Elsewhere, Kalluto walked into the Japanese-style family room. The sliding door felt like home to him, and the sight of his parents having tea together was welcoming.  
"Good afternoon." Kalluto greeted his parents. Kikyo smiled and set down her teacup.  
"Kalluto, my boy! So glad you're home!"  
"Welcome home, son." Silva nodded and sipped his tea.  
Kalluto sat at the table between them and served himself some tea.  
Kikyo watched in confusion before saying, "You can let one of the butlers serve you next time. We pay them to do this, you know."  
"Right." Kalluto took a sip of his tea and sat quietly. He hadn't realized how accustomed to taking care of himself he became just from being outside the castle walls for a few days.  
"So, how was it?" Silva asked.  
"Well, Chrollo has returned to the troupe, and the chains seem to be gone but for whatever reason his Nen is not back yet."  
"Hmph. To think there's a child out there capable of stripping someone of their Nen like that." Kikyo shivered.  
"It's not that surprising, considering it was a member of the Kurta clan who pulled it off."  
"A Kurta?!" Kikyo exclaimed.  
Silva placed his cup down. "I thought they were wiped out."  
"Apparently not, this one is a specialist too." Kalluto grabbed a cookie from a plate at the center of the small table.  
"Goodness." Kikyo's lazer eye focused back on her tea, taking note of it's emptiness. "You there, butler! Get me more tea." The young butler left the room to fetch another pot.  
"So I met Prytania." Kalluto muttered before blowing on his tea to cool it.  
"Did you, now?" Silva responded without looking up from a book he had laying on the table.  
"She was… well Illumi and her… I probably shouldn't say."  
"Say what, dear?" Kikyo asked softly.  
"I walked into the gym and they were…. Together."  
"Together?" Kikyo emphasized her question. Silva looked up from his book and took sudden interest in the conversation.  
"Yeah, together together."  
Kikyo and Silva shared a glance and smiled.  
"You see?" Kikyo beamed. " He's already warmed up to her.  
"Thank god." Silva laughed before picking his tea up off the table again.  
"Ew." Kalluto scoffed.  
"Ew?" Kikyo laughed. "One day you won't be saying 'ew' to that kind of activity."  
Kalluto shuttered.  
Silva smiled. "Just glad they're getting along." He sipped his tea.  
"Yeah, sure they're getting along just fine." Kalluto fake gagged. He watched his parents smile. He put his tea down, deciding it was still too hot. "I just think it's funny how she's only been here for a day and she seems to have him wrapped around her fingers."  
Silva looked at Kalluto and frowned. "At least now he won't be the laughingstock of the Zoldyck family."  
"But doesn't this concern you at all?!" Kalluto raised his voice.  
"You will mind your manners and keep your voice down!" Kikyo snarled at her son.  
"Calm down." Silva spoke calmly. Kikyo huffed and looked down at her tea. Silva turned to Kalluto.  
"You will leave us to worry about your brother."  
"But-"  
"I will not repeat myself."  
Silva placed his tea down again and lifted his book with his other hand.  
Kalluto stood up and left.  
"Kalluto-" Kikyo called after her son who was halfway out the room.  
"Leave him be." Silva commanded. Kikyo sighed and let him walk out.

…..  
Prytania squealed as a shipment of her things arrived. Her high-pitched noise made the butler next to her flinch. She noticed and immediately apologized.  
"I'm so sorry! I just got excited." The young girl in the butler's clothes frowned.  
"What's your name?"  
"A-Amane."  
"Amane. Sorry for being so annoying."  
"No, not at all ma'am! You just startled me is all."  
"Ah, well forgive me for startling you."  
"Miss Prytania?"  
"Yes, Amane?"  
"What is someone like you doing here?"  
"Excuse me?"  
"I- I'm sorry! I didn't mean you any disrespect ma'am, I just meant- I, um."  
"Calm down, speak slowly."  
Amane took a deep breath. "You're very kind. Not everyone here is so kind."  
"Kind? You think I'm kind?"  
"Well, yes."  
"But I haven't done anything particularly nice." Prytania smiled at the girl.  
"You asked my name."  
"Pardon?"  
"You asked for my name. Nobody here does that often. The Master of the House, Silva, sometimes asks. He can be very kind. Killua can too, but he's not here. He left to find new friends."  
"That's absurd. The madam knows your names just as much as Silva does."  
"Only when he makes her learn them. The only one she really knows or dares to care for is Gotoh and Tsubone because they're in charge of the rest of us. She usually just snaps at us to get our attention or says 'you there' or 'servant' or something like that. We're all just nameless servants to her."  
Prytania looked at the girl. "Well, I'm sorry that they're like that. It must be how she was raised. You can't blame her for that."  
Amane's eyes looked to the ground, hiding her face. "I hope you don't think that I hate her, but she's not a good person."  
"Don't say that!" Prytania watched the little girl look down at the ground. "She can't be all that bad."  
"You know, they kill us sometimes. I don't believe she's got any good in her."  
The words registered in Prytania's head.  
"What do you mean, they kill you sometimes?"  
"Amane!" A deep, elderly voice called the young butler's name. Prytania and Amane looked in the direction of the voice.  
"My apologies, Miss Prytania. I hope my granddaughter hasn't been much trouble to you." Prytania watched Tsubone place her hands around the child's shoulders and grip them tight.  
"No, not at all. She was just telling me-"  
"Children's stories, I'm sure." Tsubone was quick to cut her sentence off.  
"Well I-"  
"I'll have another butler come to help you with your belongings. Amane needs her rest."  
"But she-"  
"Please excuse us." Before Prytania could protest, Tsubone was leaving with the Amane and another butler was grabbing her luggage.  
"Wait!" Prytania called after them. They hurried away. Dread crept up on her as she wondered what Amane was going to tell her.

…...

It was lunchtime, and the Zoldyck family all sat at the table to eat. Prytania sat and ate her food daintily next to Illumi. It was a delicious ensemble of food. Light, but filling. If only the atmosphere was as nice as the food. Milluki stuffed his face to the right of her, and Kalluto ate his food while scrutinizing her every move. At the head of the table, Silva ate quietly. Kikyo sat in front of Illumi and kept smiling. Prytania was used to seeing her own father smile at nothing, but she would be lying if she said Kikyo's constant grin didn't put her at unease.  
"The food is delightful. Your servants really have outdone themselves." Prytania tried to lighten the mood. Nobody really responded to her. "Milluki likes it, don't you?" She looked at the pudgy man-child scarf down a huge spoonful of rice. She was sure rice wasn't even on the menu.  
"Milluki likes everything. That's why he's so fat." Kalluto snarked.  
"Kalluto!" Kikyo's smile broke as she focused her laser eye on Kalluto. "Apologize!"  
"No. It's true that he's fat. I'm not apologizing," Kalluto said without looking at his mother.  
"Well at least I don't look like a little girl!" Milluki spoke with his mouth full of food, but Kalluto understood enough to take offense to it.  
"This is a traditional-"  
"You look like a girl! You look like a girl!"Milluki taunted.  
Kikyo gasped, "Kalluto can dress however he likes!"  
"If you keep treating him like this, he's gonna end up gay, like Illumi!" Milluki yelled at his mother, and Kikyo's jaw dropped and her hand clutched her collar in shock at the blatant disrespect her son had displayed.  
"First of all," Kalluto stood up as he started what looked to be the beginning of a rant.  
"Please leave me out of this." Illumi pleaded with his brother, who subsequently ignored him.  
"Illumi's not gay." Kalluto asserted.  
"Yes he is!" Milluki stood up from his seat.  
"Nuh-uh! If he's gay how come I caught him and Prytania screwing in the gym!"  
"That's quite enough!" Silva's voice boomed throughout the room. Milluki and Kalluto sat down.  
Prytania looked at Illumi, who stared straight at his plate on the table and nowhere else.  
Silva motioned for the staff to leave the room. Prytania watched out of the corner of her eye as Hisoka left with them.  
"Prytania," Silva addressed Illumi's bride-to-be, and she looked at him carefully, not sure what to make of this situation. "Forgive my children, they seem to have forgotten how to act when at the table." Milluki and Kalluto mimicked Illumi and looked only at their food. "I will, however, ask that you keep any... adult activities confined to you and Illumi's respective rooms. I will not have my sons walking in on something like that again. Although I'm certainly glad Illumi likes you, please be mindful, there are children roaming the castle."  
Prytania could not believe they were having this talk. She had never once gone within three feet of Ilumi, let alone touch him. She had questions, so many questions, but she looked to Illumi, who now looked up from his plate and pleaded with her through his expresion. Oh, he owed her big time.  
Prytania looked back up to Silva, who waited for a response. "I apologize, I guess we got a little carried away."  
Illumi breathed relief. Prytania died a little inside.  
Milluki leaned close to Kalluto and whispered "So, it's true? Illumi's not gay?"  
"Milluki! Apologize to your brother." Kikyo commanded.  
"Sorry for saying you look like a girl, even though it's true." MIlluki begrudgingly spoke. Kalluto scoffed, as he often did, and said with just as much poison, "I'm sorry I said you're fat, even though it's true."  
Kikyo smacked the table at the boys, and they took to focusing on their food. Kikyo smiled again, and directed her attention to Prytania and Illumi.  
"I'm glad your belongings came in this afternoon. We can have you both moved into a bigger room in about a few days. For the meanwhile, you may stay in Illumi's room. I guess it was too presumptuous of us to suggest you two stay in separate rooms."  
Prytania's inner monologue at this point was nothing but internal screaming. She had trained for every kind of situation, or so she thought. She was trained to behave politley and in a ladylike manner. That's what was expected of her. Never had she had to receive such disgrace as a PDA breach in etiquette. All she could do was smile like her father had taught her. Smile with dead eyes and a toothy grin and hope lunch would be over soon.  
"Yes, I suppose. Thank you."

…...  
Chapter 14, Fin

Note: I had to cut this chapter in half because it was getting kinda long lolol...

So yeah have some bottom Hisoka.

Also if you don't know what that song from the beginning of the chapter is, it's "Love is Strange" which plays during one of my favorite scenes from the movie "Dirty Dancing." I almost wanted to incorporate the legendary lift from that movie but I decided to skip it because I actually want to get on with the story. I figured having Illumi somehow know the words to the song was enough lol.

Oh yeah and Kalluto is back! What a twerp.

Let me know what you think in the reviews!

I'll be updating again soon-ish.

Fluffy out!


	15. Liars

Silva rang a small bell, and the staff reentered the dining hall. Lunch continued on silently, and Prytania finished her food as quickly as her upbringing in polite society would allow her. When she was done, she excused herself from the table. Butlers came and bussed her plates away as she walked out the door. The hallway right outside of the dining room had grandiose stone pillars to match the stone walls in the castle. She stepped behind a pillar, hiding her presence until Illumi stepped out not more than a minute later. She could feel it was him, feel his aura, and right as he was in range she made quick work to grasp Illumi's hand and drag him through the hallways towards his room. Illumi hardly gasped, he probably expected it, and she silently applauded his composure to herself. Hisoka caught sight of them scurrying through the halls outside the dining room and followed.

Prytania knew he was following, even with his aura hidden she knew Hisoka was close. His footsteps were silent, much like Illumi's, but she anticipated his presence. Locating Hisoka was always like locating the source of your own sense of dread, and it made things easy for Prytania to grab hold of Hisoka's arm right as soon as he got close enough. Both Hisoka and Illumi were surprised at the death grip with which she held their arms. Even if they wanted to get away, they weren't sure they could. They got to Illumi's room and she threw them both through the door and shut it behind them. Illumi and Hisoka sat on the edge of Illumi's bed.

"Well?!" Prytania crossed her arms and darted her eyes between both of them like a mother disciplining two children would.

"Look, I can explain." Illumi started.

"I don't think I need an explanation I know exactly what happened! Kalluto found you and Hisoka fucking around except he didn't see you and you had to blame someone, right?"

"Well, yeah basically." Hisoka exhaled.

Both Hisoka and Illumi observed Prytania's eyes get wider and her nostrils flare. "I can't believe this! Illumi I'm supposed to be getting your parents to _like_ me! Now they're gonna think I'm some pervert with a public sex kink or something! What the fuck?!"

"You're not as polite when you talk to us as when you talk to Illumi's family." Hisoka chimed in, for no reason.

"Shut your whore mouth, Hisoka!"

Hisoka raised his hands in defense and said no more.

Prytania turned back to Illumi. "What the fuck were you thinking?!"

"You don't actually want to know what I was thinking."

"Agh!" Prytania threw her hands in the air, seemingly cursing at whatever heavenly deity was up there to ignore to her.

Illumi scratched the side of his face with one hand. "Well, at least my mother seems to be happy now that she thinks we, uh- like each other."

"She's probably already thinking of all the different ways she can filet me!" Prytania held her head in her hands.

Illumi thought for a second. "No really, she's probably more than happy that she thinks we're like, active, or whatever."

Prytania pinched her nose and held one hand on her hip in frustration. Hisoka crossed his legs and leaned back on the bed. Prytania exhaled.

"I don't ever want to look your father in the eyes again."

"Believe me, neither do I." Illumi laughed.

"Oh you think this is funny?!" Illumi nodded 'no' as Prytania paced the room, recounting everything that occurred. "You know, I thought it was really weird the way your brother was looking at me and now I fucking know why! Dammit! And-and YOUR FATHER. He said, ' _Please be mindful!_ ' To me that's what he fucking said, 'Please be mindful!'!" Prytania repeated herself and Illumi just looked down at his floor. Prytania exhaled. "I can't believe this. I'm dreaming right now this is all a weird, sick, twisted fucking nightmare."

"No it's real." Hisoka muttered. Prytania inhaled sharply. She slowed her pacing and came to a stop in front of Illumi.

"Illumi, if I'm going to be married into this family I'm gonna need all the secrets."

"What?"

Hisoka and Illumi looked at Prytania, unsure of her meaning.

"There are all these loose ends that don't make sense. One of your butlers said sometimes you guys- your family, or your mother I'm not sure- kills them sometimes. What does that mean? There's hallways in this mansion that don't lead anywhere and there's big metal doors with impossible locks. What are you hiding?"

Hisoka and Prytania were now both looking at Illumi. His face was like a stone- no expression.

Illumi looked Prytania in the eye. "The dog, Mike. Sometimes we-"

"No, don't- don't do that. Don't lie to me. I know your family is hiding something and I want to know what it is." Prytania pointed a finger at Illumi.

Hisoka watched the exchange closely. He wanted to know what was going on too.

Illumi cocked his head to the side and answered curtly, "No."

"I just looked at your father's face and apologized for something YOU did. You OWE me!"

"Yeah, sorry, but that's not a good enough reason for me to spill the family secrets."

"Not a good enough reason? Are you serious? How about _we're getting married_ in a matter of hours? I'm literally going to be a part of your family soon. I think that's a good enough reason so tell me!"

"No."

"Tell me!"

"I said No _!"_

"Why not!"

"Leave it alone!" Illumi yelled as he stood up from the bed, now standing taller than Prytania. Hisoka stared in awe. He'd seen Illumi this level of annoyed before, but only a couple of times. Whatever this was, Prytania was persistent but he knew Illumi wasn't going to budge. Prytania looked up at him with such determination and she was not the least bit intimidated. To say Hisoka was interested in how things were playing out would be a vast understatement. His curiosity had been piqued and it needed to be sated.

"I won't leave it alone because you're gonna tell me!"

"Leave it alone or the wedding's off!"

"Call off the wedding and I'll spill _everything!_ " The words left Prytania's mouth like swords. They were the only leverage she had, and she'd promised herself and Illumi that she wouldn't use it, but she couldn't afford to mess up this contract and she needed to fucking know.

"Take that back." Illumi huffed.

"No."

"I'm not telling you for your own protection!"

"Protection from WHAT _?_ "

"I can't tell you!"

"Yes you can!"

"I haven't even told Hisoka!"

"I don't care! Tonight I'm going to be your legal-motherfucking-wife!" Illumi approached Prytania, trying to push her back. She didn't budge and now he towered over her at an alarmingly close proximity. Bloodlust pooled around Illumi, seeping from him like untethered coils. Hisoka watched silently as Prytania remained headstrong.

"Who trained you?" Illumi tilted his head at Prytania and squinted.

"What?" Prytania shifted her eyes to Hisoka and back to Illumi, trying to avoid looking at him. Illumi caught it immediately.

"You think Hisoka and I can't recognize that you've been trained in some kind of martial arts? There's no way just anyone could sense either of us coming in order for you to grab us the way you did out in the hall. Besides, I figure the company wouldn't have sent you into a den of assassins without some way to protect yourself, right? So, who trained you?"

Prytania felt the sting of Hisoka's stare on her body, watching and smiling like the Cheshire cat for her answer. "My father."

"And who exactly is your father?"

"That's not important."

"Okay, I guess you don't want to know what's going on here."

"He's nobody! He's just some freak who knows how to fight."

Hisoka spoke up from behind Illumi. "We can tell you're stronger than someone who was trained by just 'some freak', Prytania. You have very dedicated self-control, but there's not a lot of people who can throw us around without breaking a sweat. We know you're stronger than you look."

Illumi chuckled. "I bet you opened the gates of testing yourself. You didn't have anyone to help you get in, did you? So who trained you?"

Prytania glanced first at Hisoka then at Illumi. "Pariston."

"The Zodiac?!" Illumi exclaimed. Hisoka couldn't help but grin evilly, his aura seeping out and bloodlust tainting the air.

"Who would have known the daughter of a Zodiac would become a wife for hire." Hisoka teased.

"You don't fucking know shit!" Prytania hissed.

"Enlighten us, then. How did the daughter of a Zodiac get stuck with such a lowly position."

"First of all, this is not a lowly position!"

"Bull fucking shit." Hisoka rolled his eyes. "We all know that only the company only chooses women with no chances left. I'll admit, I've never seen any agent that's quite as skilled as you. Nadiya was weaker than you by several leagues. But for some reason, it's the end of the road for you if you don't seal this contract and marry Illumi."

Illumi watched closely as the color in Prytania's skin slowly left her cheeks.

"I- You had gone missing!" Prytania spoke franticly at Hisoka. "I-I wasn't using my resources to find you and the other contracts in my charge and you were suspected in Nadiya's death so-"

"Don't lie." Hisoka's grin was vicious. Prytania felt the urge to run or fight or something other than stand there and have this conversation, but there she stood, still as a deer in headlights. Hisoka stood from the bed and walked over to her. "If it were that simple, you'd have turned me in by now. Wouldn't that redeem you? Get you a ticket out? Then why haven't you done that? Why have you let us do whatever we want as long as you get Illumi's hand in marriage?"

"You don't know anything!" Prytania hated that as angry as she was, her tears welled up in her eyes again, and her voice was breaking.

Hisoka placed his hand under her chin. "I know you're not just some poor girl who somehow got wrapped up in all of this..." Prytania sniffled as she looked up at the two wolves in front of her. One with dead black eyes and matching black hair, the other with teeth bared from ear to ear. Hisoka's hand shifted to grip her neck and lift uncomfortably, choking her. "If you were, you'd be long dead."

Prytania's tears fell from her eyes, but she still had just enough spite in her to spit at Hisoka. He let her go from his grip on her throat to wipe his face. Prytania took a step back. "You don't fucking know anything! My father and the company that he's with want some the strongest kids under their control! They don't care at what cost! So I was born into it- a product of Pariston's master plan but he killed my mother to do it. They kill others, too. I thought- I thought I could save them - the women they had in the labs acting as surrogate mothers, carrying these babies. I tried setting them free but everything we tried failed. I tried to help them escape some other way but they were too fucking stupid to not get caught!" Prytania's tears fell freely. "They- fuck. I couldn't save them. I couldn't save them so I started killing them. I killed a whole laboratory full of them. They were going to die painful deaths anyway so I did them a favor."

"Were they pregnant?" Illumi asked softly.

Prytania sobbed. "Yes. They all were. Each of them had a contract baby in their bellies. Each of them had a net worth of about thirty thousand in their stomachs but their lives weren't worth shit to the company!"

"You killed them and cost the company thousands?" Illumi crossed his arms.

"We had to find all new girls to re-inseminate. The cost of replacing and re-inseminating them was way more than we anticipated. My father saved me from going straight to the laboratory to try to replace all what we'd lost. He had me change my name and position in the company. But they found out. I was gonna be a human vessel for their precious new race of strong babies anyway, so my father took the first chance he got to assign me to someone who wanted a natural marriage contract. If I don't marry Illumi, I go to the lab to be pregnant all the time and push out babies for their plan. I'm nothing but a baby-making machine to them."

Illumi shifted his weight. "Well I already knew you were at the end of the line, but your big secret is that you killed those girls?"

"Those deaths are on my hands."

"How many?"

"What?"

"How many?"

"A little under two hundred." Prytania muttered.

"Two _Hundred?_ "

Hisoka looked at Illumi. "Oh, come on Illumi you've killed loads more than that."

"Yeah, I know. I just thought when she said they had a laboratory I pictured it smaller in my head."

Prytania used her sleeve to wipe her face. Mascara smeared her cheeks.

Hisoka sat back down and leaned back on the bed. "So that's her big secret. She's actually strong, maybe even a Nen-user and killed a bunch of innocent girls to spare them from excruciating death. So!"

"So?" Illumi glanced back at Hisoka.

"So, now it's your turn. She spilled hers, time to tell us yours."

Illumi turned to face Hisoka completely and clicked his tongue. "I don't remember you telling us any of your secrets?"

"What's there to tell? You know I had a wife and kid from this company. Besides, _my_ secrets weren't part of the deal."

"He's right." Prytania said, wiping the last tears from her eyes. "Now it's your turn."

Illumi sighed as Prytania walked around him to sit on the bed next to Hisoka. Her posture was straight, unlike Hisoka, who leaned to one side a bit. Illumi flared his nose before grabbing a frilly ottoman to sit on in front of the other two.

He leaned forward and clasped his hands together, intertwining his fingers. He sighed. "My mother had five children." Illumi paused. Prytania looked over to Hisoka, who also seemed confused. Illumi continued. "I was born first, then Milluki, followed by the heir to the family business, Killua... and Kalluto is the youngest."

"That's only four." Prytania muttered.

"My mother had another child before Kalluto. This... child, if you could call it that, was different. It was always different."

"It?" Prytania asked. Illumi continued.

"Alluka had these abilities. I won't tell you how it works, but basically there's something... not human about that.. _Thing._ It causes death if you don't give it what it wants."

"What do you mean causes death?" Hisoka sat up.

"When certain requirements are not met, depending on the circumstance, people die. Instantaneously. They just- they get crushed. Just like that. Their bodies mince into thin air. It's never just one."

"I don't understand."

"For your own safety and the safety of everyone here, I can't tell you how it works with Alluka. Any interaction could cause the death of at the very least two people. We've lost.. We lost servants because of him."

"They kill us sometimes." Prytania muttered.

"Huh?"

"You said you lost servants."

"Yes, over sixty butlers at one time."

"One of your butlers today said that your family kills them sometimes."

"They might have been referring to that event. I tried to test what would happen. I thought only two would die. I was wrong."

"You were okay with killing two of your servants?"

"We needed to know how it worked."

"How what worked?" Prytania asked

"Alluka's powers."

"That doesn't make sense! If you knew their powers killed people why test it at all?"

Hisoka chuckled. "Because the power must be one hell of a trade-off."

Illumi swallowed as Hisoka continued. "You wanted to know how the power worked because whatever it is, it's something sweet. Something even you would want to learn to control because it would give you power beyond what you already have."

"Yes. That's why I can't tell you what it is."

"You're afraid I'll go looking for it."

"Knowing you like I do, I know damn sure you would."

"Now I'm curious as to what it is. If it killed sixty people as a negative result then the intended outcome must have been incredible."

"But Hisoka, Illumi just said it kills people!" Prytania looked at Hisoka with concern.

"I kill people all the time." Hisoka grinned.

"Not like this." Illumi looked at Hisoka. "The consequence of using Alluka's power is if certain requirements are not met, the user dies too."

"Then how did you test it if the user dies too?" Hisoka asked. When Illumi didn't respond, Hisoka smiled. "You forced a butler to do it."

"Better her than me."

Prytania gasped. "I can't believe you! Those are your butlers! Your trusted servants!"

"Family comes first. I needed to test Alluka and I wasn't going to die finding out. So yes, I planned to sacrifice a couple butlers."

Hisoka chuckled. "But more than just a couple ended up dying because of it."

Illumi nodded.

Prytania looked at her hands for a moment before looking back up at Illumi.

"So then what did your family do after that?" Prytania asked. Illumi looked at her with the straight face he wore so well.

"We killed Alluka." Illumi looked directly at Prytania, expression unbreaking and dull. She noted Illumi's poker-face was another kind of unsettling akin to her father's eerie smile.

Hisoka chuckled to himself again.

Prytania exhaled in relief. "Well I'd say that's better for everyone. Now Alluka won't be able to hurt anyone.."

"Right."

"No wonder the butlers are all so afraid of you. They know you don't value their lives as much as your own."

"It won't happen again, but you're right that's probably why they don't like us all that much."

"See? Was that so hard? Now we know everything about each other and there's no secrets between us."

Illumi sighed. "Prytania?"

"Hmm?"

"Would you mind leaving for a bit? It's.. Not a fond memory."

"Of course. Sorry. I probably need to clean my face and I should probably be getting ready anyway."

"Ready for what?"

"The... wedding?"

"Right."

Prytania scoffed and left. Hisoka laid back on the bed.

" _'Not a fond memory?_ ' That was a nice touch." Hisoka grinned at the ceiling.

"Excuse me?"

"So where are you all hiding them? Alluka, I mean."

"Alluka is dead."

Hisoka sat up. "You might be able to pull one on Prytania, but I'm no fool. Since when did you give a damn about the safety of your butlers?"

"Since more than sixty of them died instantly. What are you getting at, anyway?"

"Your family wouldn't kill a member of your own."

"Alluka is hardly family. It's something else entirely."

"You're speaking about him in present tense. This entire time you've referred to him like he's still here. Besides, even if you all were okay with killing other family members, I highly doubt anyone of you would give up a weapon so powerful."

Illumi stood up quietly and walked over to a small table where a teapot had been prepared for him earlier. It was cold, but he still poured a cup.

"So where is this extra child of the Zoldycks?"

Illumi sighed. "Dead. Six feet under. Pushing up daisies."

"Uh-huh." Hisoka bit his lip. Illumi sipped his cold tea, not answering.

"So he's here. Somewhere in the castle."

"What makes you think Alluka is alive?"

"Because you're lying to me."

"Sucks to be lied to, doesn't it?"

"Actually it just makes me more curious about what their powers can actually do."

"Don't try to find out. There will be no point."

"No point?"

"Hisoka, drop this."

Hisoka pouted. "I'll find out eventually, so why don't you just tell me?"

Illumi set his cup down with a clang. "I mean it, Hisoka. Drop it or I _will_ kill you."

Hisoka smirked. "So you'd really kill me over something like this? No matter how much you like me?"

Illumi tilted his head. "What gave you the idea that I liked you?"

Hisoka laughed. Illumi's lips stretched just enough to count as a smile.

"I think it's time I start getting ready for this... ceremony... thing."

"I believe it's called a wedding."

"Whatever."

Hisoka rolled over on the bed, wrinkling the bedspread as he stretched and yawned. "Send me on an errand, will you?"

"Why, exactly?"

"I'm bored and I want to walk around."

"You mean you want to snoop around my family estate."

"Sure."

"You're terrible."

"It's not like you can stop me."

"Don't be so sure of yourself."

"Is that a threat?"

Illumi sighed. "Bring me some warm towels on your way back. Make yourself a useful butler for once."

At that, Hisoka sprung off the bed. "Certainly, your grace!"

"I'm not royalty."

"Absolutely not, your highness." Hisoka kissed Illumi on the cheek before bouncing out the room like a kid on an adventure.

…...

Kalluto moved quickly through the hallway. Milluki lagged behind him.

"Kalluto! You're too fast!"

"Hurry, dammit! It was this way!"

"What are we chasing again?"

"I felt an aura. Something familiar but not one of ours."

"What does that even mean?"

"I think there's an intruder here! Someone I've encountered before. Whoever it is, they keep trying to hide it."

"Kalluto, if it's someone you've met before wouldn't you know who it was?"

"That's the problem. They're hiding their prescence, and the last time I felt it, it was coming from this way."

"Last time you felt it? You can't sense it anymore?"  
"No, I can't."

"Then what are we looking for?"  
"I don't know. A clue?"

"A clue? What are you, a detective?"

"An assassin you dimwit."

"At least I don't go chasing things that probably don't exist."

"I felt SOMETHING okay?"

"Right. We'll have fun trying to find it. I'm tired."

Kalluto nodded and didn't wait for Milluki to turn around to head further down the hallway.

…...

Prytania held her cell phone up to her ear and tapped her foot. She sat in her room amongst boxes of all her things.

"Hello-"

"Dad! Hi, I-"

"-you've reached Pariston. Leave a message" Prytania waited for the voicemail beep.

"Dad. It's me. I have some new information. Call me back."

Prytania hung up and sighed. She felt a weight behind her on the bed and pulled her gun out just in time to point it at Hisoka's smiling face.

"You really need to stop sneaking into my room."

"And You really need to start telling the truth."

Prytania cocked her gun. Hisoka laughed slow before glancing at his finger, which he held upright above his others.

"What are you laughing about?"

"This." Hisoka pulled his finger up, and suddenly Prytania's hair was yanked upwards, pulling her hair and startling her just enough for Hisoka to use his other hand to disarm her.

"How the hell?!" Prytania spit out her words as she tried to claim control of her hair back.

"Bungee Gum."

"But I didn't even feel you touch me!"

"You don't have feeling in your hair, silly." Hisoka watched her struggle for a moment, holding her slightly higher than her usual height, letting her feet barely dangle above the surface of her bed as she squirmed. It was always so much more fun when they squirmed.

"Put me down!"

"Ah-ah-ah." Hisoka wiggled his finger at her, gun still in hand. Prytania's face was red with fury.

"Oh, don't look at me like that." Hisoka cooed. Prytania swung her foot to hit Hisoka in the groin. He let go of her as he hunched over in pain, and she landed on the bed clumsily.

"Couldn't you have just pulled my hair with your hand?"

"Bungee- gum has the properties of both rubber and gum." Hisoka groaned, still hunched over.

Just when she got her footing, she grabbed Hisoka's hair, pulling his head back just enough to punch him in the face. It felt good to punch him, but only for a second, because the damn clown moaned like he liked it.

"Ugh."

Before Prytania could do anything else, Hisoka stood and embraced her, hugging her tightly. She was confused, so confused... until she felt the barrel of her gun against the back of her head.

"You know, a little more training and you could really do some damage." Hisoka whispered.

"What the fuck is your deal?" Prytania huffed.

"Tell me what new information you planned to share with daddy dearest."

"I don't have to tell you shit."

"You're right, you most certainly don't have to, if you want to die."

"You can't kill me."

"Wrong! Illumi can't kill you. I, however, can murder whomever I please. So, the information..." Hisoka tapped the gun against the back of her head, keeping his finger off the trigger, careful not to kill her accidentally.

"You think I believe that load of crap Illumi spun together?"

"Hm? About Alluka?"

"If this Alluka person is real there's no way in hell he's dead."

"Yes, I had figured that much as well. So what, your plan is to tell Pariston about the secrets of the Zoldyck family?"

"Why the fuck else would I be here!"

"Ah, there are your true colors."

"Oh, please. As if you believed I was just here to get pregnant."

"Of course I never imagined you'd be here to just make babies. Although you put on quite a show. Making up that story about killing all those girls.. I gotta say very nice touch with the tears. You're a good actress, but a liar knows a liar."

"I'd love to dish out the details of all of this, liar to liar, if you don't mind getting your boner off my stomach."

"What? Oh that's not a boner that's actually the rolled up towel I brought with me for Illumi... I put it in my pants in case you try to kick me again."

"Smart. Still feels weird with you hugging me, though. Could you maybe threaten me from a distance?"

"Nope. This makes you more uncomfortable."

"I hate you."

"The feeling's mutual."

Prytania sighed. "The story about the laboratory is true. I killed all those girls. The company really does want me dead, but they'd sooner die than cross my father. I owe him my life more than just because he's my father. He saved me."

"That's his job, though. Isn't it? To protect you?"

"Yeah and you would know because you're such an exemplary father figure."

"Albert was a failure. His death, although unplanned, was the most merciful thing that could have happened to him."

"How do you think he felt knowing you never loved him because of his shortcomings?"

Hisoka was silent.

"Right. Anyway, I owe him my life. My father's disappointment in me runs deep, but he still does what he can. So if I can get him a little intel here and there, especially on the Zoldyck family, who seems to be so set on killing anyone for power, then I give it to him."

"You really are just a goody-two-shoes."

"You're just jealous my moral compass is better than yours."

"You know well enough I don't even have a moral compass."

"Be that as it may, I do need you to let me go so I can get ready."

"What, so you can call Pariston again?"

"He's not going to be answering my calls until after the wedding."

"You could still leave a voicemail."

"I wouldn't dare leave such sensitive information over a voicemail."

"I can't let you go if you're going to be sharing information to your father."

"Well you can't hold me forever."

"Maybe not, but I'm going to take your phone."

"What?! No, you can't."

Hisoka shoved away from Prytania and grabbed her cellphone off the bed.

"Give that back!"

"I have a suggestion for you."

Prytania jumped, trying to reach her cellphone which Hisoka held above his head with his arm extended.

"Listen to me. If you want to get your father's attention, you're going to have to call him with something bigger than just a little bit of information."

Prytania stopped jumping and looked at Hisoka inquisitively.

"Call him when you have proof that Alluka exists. Better yet, call him when you have them and you can control their power. Then you'll have brought him more than information. You'll have brought him a weapon."

Hisoka smirked at Prytania's wide eyes as he handed her back her cellphone, gently laying it in her hand.

"If we find Alluka, I don't care who you call. Shit, you can call Netero and the whole Hunter Association, but we need to find proof first."

"We?"

"You have appearances to keep up and I have a boyfriend to steal. We're on a time limit, remember?" Hisoka pointed at Prytania's stomach. "Once you're knocked up and you get huge it's going to be kind of difficult to help me so we need to work fast."

"Which means working together."

"Now you get it!"

"And what you're just going to somehow keep this all from Illumi?"

"Well he didn't want to tell us anything about Alluka. You opened this can of worms, hun. I don't have to say anything. You're the one with the burning desire to impress daddy."

"First of all, please stop referring to my father as 'daddy.' Secondly, I'll tell Illumi."

"And I'll tell him you were going to tell Pariston the family secrets."

"I don't want you in on this."

"Too late. You need me."

"You're my least favorite person."

"Oh please I make that peg on everyone's list, you're no one special." Hisoka handed Prytania her pistol back.

"I can't believe I slept with you."

"Honestly, with your daddy issues and general insecurity, I'm not surprised at all."

"Bitch, don't you have something to clean?"

"And here I thought you cared about the sorrowful plight of the Zoldyck Butlers."

"Get your weird ass out of my room so I can get ready for this stupid wedding."

"I came in here to ask you something."

"Oh, so you weren't just snooping?"

"You're marrying MY boyfriend, remember?"

"How could I forget."

"Tonight, when... When you guys are together. Please-"

"Don't ask me for a favor two minutes after you pointed a gun to my head."

"I'm not asking you for a favor. I'm asking that you not to get yourself killed."

"What?"

"Illumi is finnicky and makes rash decisions sometimes. Don't die tonight."

"Oh...kay?"

"I'm serious. It'll be a lot harder to get out of here if you die."

"Sounds like you need me."

"Don't get cocky."

"I'll remember that the next time you threaten my life."

"That'll be sooner rather than later if you keep up with that attitude."

"Leave already!"

Hisoka left the room and slammed the door behind him.

…...

Illumi checked himself out in the mirror. Was he getting fat? His butt looked really round in those pants...

"Hey Illumi. Here's your towel."

Hisoka tossed the towel roll to Illumi, who caught it.

"Thanks. How was your walk? Find anything? The secret family dungeon?"

"Nope. Nothing yet. I'll find it eventually."

"I'm sure you will."

Illumi walked over to his restroom and wet the towel, bringing it to his face.

"Uh, Hisoka?"  
"Yeah?"

"Why does this towel smell like your crotch?"

…...

Chapter 15, Fin

Next time on: Emotions are not for Assassins

~THE WEDDING~

Also: more scandal probably (gasp! ESCANDALO!)

ALSO: the return of a certain former roommate...


	16. Forever Hold Your Peace

Gotoh entered the bedroom and approached Kikyo, who wore a light blue Kimono. She sat in front of her vanity set, looking herself up and down with her laser eye.

"Quite a fetching color on you."

"Oh, Gotoh! It's you. Do you really like it? It's so much lighter than what I usually wear but I figured, it _is_ my eldest son's wedding."

"You look beautiful." Gotoh's eyes lingered on the lady of the house. Her hair was up in an elegant style, with decorative clips matching the color of her kimono.

"Did you need something, Gotoh?" Kikyo asked.

"Oh, um. Yes, pardon me." Gotoh cleared his throat. "The priest is here."

"Oh, good. Is he in the estate now?"

"As of yet, no. He's still at the base of the mountain."

"Why has he not let himself in?"

"When I spoke to Zebro, he told me the man said he sustained an injury that has prevented him from opening the testing gates."

Kikyo scoffed. "If I had known the man would be unable to enter I wouldn't have called him!" Kikyo applied powder to her face, still looking at the mirror. She sighed. "I guess I shouldn't be picky. He was available on such short notice and he's done services for us before."

"I can send Canary to get him." Gotoh offered.

"That's fine." Kikyo pouted into the mirror, adoring her lipstick.

Gotoh bowed curtly before turning to leave, but Kikyo stopped him.

"Wait." Gotoh turned and stood patiently, bowing his head politley. Kikyo loved that he always showed her the upmost respect, unlike the other butlers.

"Help me with this necklace."

Gotoh nodded silently as he stepped closer to Kikyo. She handed him a light blue choker with delicate white lace and beads, then turned around. Gotoh brought it around her neck and clipped the ends of it together. He might have wanted to let his fingers linger on the clasp, but he didn't dare overstep his boundries.

"All set." Gotoh bowed his head again. "I'm sure Silva will be taken aback by your lovely appearance today."

Kikyo sighed. "If only he appreciated me like you do." She muttered the words just loud enough for Gotoh to hear.

"I must be going." Gotoh turned and quickly left the room. Kikyo pouted.

…...

Chrollo sat in front of the gates, silently reading a book with the words "Shinto Weddings 101" printed on the front of the black paperback. Zebro, the family's gate-keeper, stood in front of him, bewildered, with a cigarette in his mouth.

"They're actually sending someone to get you."

"I figured as much."

"You're supposed to officiate some wedding going on in there?"

"Yup."

"I thought butlers weren't allowed relationships."

"It's not a butler. My friend, Illumi, is tying the knot today."

"Your friend, huh?"

"Yup." Chrollo stayed mostly focused on his book.

"You know, the last time one of my employer's sons had a friend come to visit they told them to buzz off."

"I guess that makes me special."

"I'm just surprised... The last time the boy and his friends ended up opening the gates themselves to get in."

Chrollo turned the page in his book, not looking up from where he sat. "Sounds fascinating."

"The boy was very kind... I think his name was Gon."

Chrollo looked up at Zebro at the sound of the name.

"Gon, huh? Yeah I know him. He's a good kid. Strong as hell. His friends are pretty terrifying, too."

"Oh, you know him?"

"I've... encountered him before, yes."

"Well then you know how pure a heart that boy has."

"Mhm." Chrollo turned his attention back to the book.

Zebro looked up to the sky and exhaled. "I hope wherever he is, he's doing okay."

"He's probably fine."

...

Meanwhile, Gon fights ants and shit with Killua.

…...

The gates opened, and a small figure poked her head through the opening.

"Are you the priest?"

Chrollo stood up. "Sure."

"I'm Canary. Follow me." The small butler held the gates open for Chrollo to pass through. Chrollo closed his book and nodded to Zebro in parting.

The pair passed through the giant gates and into the estate grounds. Canary released her hold on the gates and they shut with a loud noise. Canary didn't break too much of a sweat, and she began to lead the way. Chrollo followed behind her with his book tucked under his arm and his hands in his pockets.

After a few minutes of silence, Canary broke the awkward air. "You don't look like a Shinto priest."

Chrollo, taken aback by the sudden statement, stumbled on a tree root on the path before replying. "Well, you don't look like a butler."

"And what is a butler supposed to look like?"

"What's a Shinto priest supposed to look like?"

"You have a cross on your forehead. Isn't that like, not even a part of-"

"I... perform ceremonies in many different cultures and traditions..." Chrollo cut her off.

He stared at the back of the young butler's head as she continued to lead the way. She didn't ask any more questions. Chrollo followed quietly.

…...

The Zoldyck family gathered in one of the many sitting rooms. Illumi's grandfather, Zeno sat by himself. Silva stood with Kikyo by a window.

Silva stood in front of his wife with his arms crossed. "Where's Kalluto and Milluki?"

"I'm sure they're around. They'll be here before we move to the shrine." Kikyo stood with her arms behind her back. Silva grunted impatiently. Kikyo sighed and let her arms fall to the side. "It's just a shame Killua won't be here."

Silva gently placed his hand on his wife's shoulder. "I'm sure wherever Killua is, he's doing just fine."

...

Meanwhile, Killua faces some upsetting ant shit with Gon.

...

Zeno bounced his foot, which was crossed over his leg. "So I meant to ask you, Kikyo.."

"Hm?" Kikyo looked over to her father-in-law.

"This woman you hired to come into our home and join the family even though we don't know her..."

"Zeno, we know what we're doing."

"Does she have family?"

"A father."

"And will he be here?"

"I take it, no. This is a contract marriage to a family of assassins, I doubt her father would want any part of it."

"Just like your family didn't want any part of your wedding."

Kikyo frowned at Zeno's spiteful words. "My family wasn't at my ceremony because they're all dead."

Zeno sighed. "Who are you getting to officiate the ceremony?"

"Oh, well we sent for Riku. He's the same priest who-" Just then, the door opened. A familiar face stepped in – a face with a cross on its forehead. Zeno stood up.

" _You!_ "

Chrollo smiled. "Zeno, Old pal!"

"I may be old, but I'm not your pal!" Zeno's hands were raised and he stood with a firm stance, ready to attack at the drop of a hat.

"Didn't they tell you, I'm the priest!"

"What?!" Zeno looked at Kikyo, who looked at Silva, who in turn looked back at both of them.

Realizing nobody had invited Chrollo, they all looked back to the smug person standing at the door.

Kikyo cleared her throat, trying to regain some composure. "What happened to the priest we hired? Riku was supposed to be here!"

Chrollo cleared his throat before speaking. "Ricky couldn't make it, he had some business to take care of last minute..." Riku, the hired priest, was actually not busy, but very much laying face down dead in a ditch just a mile away from Kukuroo Mountain.

Zeno's calm anger filled the room. "You tried to steal our powers."

"Ah, yes that was a bit of a sticky situation and I can see why you'd be worried that I'm here... But I'm sure your son, Kalluto, informed you that I'm still without use of my Nen."

"Did Kalluto know you were coming?" Silva asked.

Chrollo sighed. "No, I didn't mention to him that I would be coming. He'll probably be just as surprised as you all are."

"Then why the hell are you here?!" Zeno shouted.

Illumi poked his head into the room.

"Oh, Chrollo. You're here."

"Illu! Good to see you. Thank you for inviting me to officiate your wedding!"

"I did what now?" Illumi whispered. Chrollo looked at him pleadingly, as if to say 'go along with it!"

"Of course, I did..." Illumi finally responded.

Illumi took a step further into the family room and looked around to see everyone with their guards up and confused as hell.

"So... Chrollo is going to be officiating."

"Why?" Kikyo said through grit teeth.

Illumi thought for a moment. "Chrollo... was my roommate and our former client so I guess he's the closest thing I have to a friend."

"You don't have any-" Kikyo started. She stopped only to take a deep breath. "Why didn't you ask me first?!" Kikyo snapped.

"Well, it IS my wedding so I didn't imagine I had to ask." Illumi responded calmly.

"YOu- you're getting married to a girl that WE picked out!"

"Still my wedding."

Kikyo looked like a boiling teapot, you could almost see steam coming out of her ears from her fury. She clutched her fists together tightly, digging her nails into her palms. Silva placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Well then, I guess we should get this over with." Silva sighed. "Where the hell are my other sons?"

...

Kalluto hid in the darkness of a corner outside Illumi and Prytania's rooms.

"What are you doing?"

Kalluto turned to see Amane standing in the hallway, holding fine white linens and some boxy-looking hat made of white fabric.

"None of your business." Kalluto regained focus on the doors.

"One of the other butlers mentioned to me that your father is looking for you and your brother, Milluki."

"I'll be going in just a minute." Kalluto stayed glued to his position.

Amane shrugged, then began walking towards the rooms. Kalluto stopped her.

"What do you think you're doing!"

Amane bowed her head a little before speaking. "I'm just delivering Prytania's kimono."

"For what?!"  
"The ceremony, sir."

"Ceremony? Wait, what time is it?"

"It's nearly five."

"Shit! Okay I guess that's why my father is looking for me." Kalluto looked at the rooms and then at Amane. "You are to report to me if you see anything strange."

"Certainly, sir."

Kalluto stood from his crouching position and turned to leave, but he looked at the butler. She was probably older than him, but she was still a kid.

"What's your name?" Kalluto questioned.

Amane's eyes gleamed with something strange that Kalluto wasn't sure what to call it. Happiness? Tears? Kalluto didn't know he had just inadvertently done something kind.

"Amane. My name is Amane."

"Right... Anyway, report to me."

Kalluto left the young butler in the hallway and headed for the family room.

Amane breathed in a clean air of assurance, knowing that for once one of the family actually asked her name of their own free will. She looked down at the white Kimono in her arms and smiled before moving towards the door in front of her. She knocked on Prytania's room and called for her. "Madam Prytania? I have your kimono for the ceremony. And this... hat... thing?"

Prytania opened the door to the small butler. "I believe it's called _Tsunokakushi."_ Her hair and makeup was done beautifully, and she wore a wrap robe.

"Tsu-no... ka-sushi?" Amane giggled.

"Close enough. Get in here." Prytania smiled and opened the door widely for the young servant to enter.

Amane hesitated.

"What's wrong?"

"I was just told to deliver this to you – nothing else."

"I'll need help putting it on."

"I don't think-"

"I won't ask you any questions about what you said earlier today."

"Oh- um, that was-"

"You don't have to explain if you don't want to."

"Okay..." Amane looked over her shoulder one more time before entering the room.

…...

Kalluto sped past Milluki's room, but stopped and turned around once he realized he saw light coming from underneath the door. He knocked.

"Milluki?"

No answer. He knocked harder.

"Milluki, dad's looking for us."

Kalluto heard shuffling from the other side of the door, followed by heavy footsteps approaching. Milluki opened the door and poked his head out.

"What do you want, brat?"

"Dad's looking for us. I think everyone is gathered in the family room by now. They might want to head for the shrine."

Milluki stared at his younger brother for a moment before grunting and emerging from the dark room. He blinked, getting used to the brighter hallway.

"This is going to be a drag." Milluki mumbled. Kalluto said nothing as they walked to the family room.

...

Tsubone approached Prytania's room. Amane had not yet returned from delivering the kimono and she worried what her granddaughter would say.

The door was shut, and Amane's aura was detectable through the door. She was inside the room, alone with Prytania. Tsubone knocked on the door and called for her granddaughter.

"Amane?"

A moment passed before Prytania opened the door. Her white Kimono fit her perfectly and her ceremonial hat fit nicely on her head. Amane looked at the door from inside the room with wide eyes.

"Good evening, Tsubone."

"Good evening, ma'am. I'm terribly sorry that Amane has bothered you."

"It's no bother at all! She came to deliver the kimono but I also needed help putting it on, so it was perfect!"

"Ah. I see." Tsubone looked to Amane, who looked more distressed. "Come along, now."

Amane stepped over to the door quickly, not a single hesitation about her. She looked at Prytania as she passed her, with a worrying expression. Prytania furrowed her brows at her, as if to ask if she would be okay. Amane looked away as Tsubone grabbed the small girls hand.

Tsubone didn't bother smiling. "Please let Illumi's butler, HIro know if you need any further assistance."

Prytania smiled her million-dollar fake smile as she closed the door without answering.

As soon as the door was shut, Tsubone and Amane hurried away to a closed off hallway. Tsubone crouched down to Amane's level so they could see eye to eye. Amane was already crying.

"What's wrong, love?"

"She knows." Amane choked out.

"She knows what?"

"She knows about Alluka!" Tsubone's mouth gaped open and she covered her face with her hand to muffle a gasp. Just then, Gotoh turned around the corner.

"Did I hear correctly?"

Tsubone stood at the sight of the family's head butler. "Gotoh! The child doesn't know what she's saying!"

"This is not good." Gotoh growled.

Amane hiccuped. "I didn't say anything! Kalluto had told me to keep an eye on her for anything strange and she invited me into her room and then she started asking me all these things you have to believe me I didn't say anything!"

Tsubone rubbed her hand on Amane's back. "Calm yourself."

"This is not good," Gotoh repeated, "This is not good."

…...

Kalluto and Milluki had reached the family room to find the air filled with tension.

Milluki looked around the room and realized he was still dressed in his western clothes while the rest of his family opted for traditional Japanese dress. He thought about changing, but at this point he really didn't care.

Kalluto registered that the leader of the Phantom Troupe was not only in his house but sitting in the family room.

"Chrollo?" Kalluto asked, unbelieving.

"Kalluto! Good to see you."

"What- what are you doing here? Is something wrong?"

"I'm performing your brother's wedding today."

Kalluto glanced to Illumi, who sat near Chrollo in his traditional dress, back straight as a board and his eyes looked into space with unwavering concentration on seemingly nothing.

"Oh...kay..." Kalluto moved to sit with his mother. Milluki walked over to Illumi and Chrollo to sit by Illumi, who barely nodded to acknowledge his presence.

The door opened and Hiro, Illumi's new butler, walked in.

"Prytania is ready if you all would like to move to the shrine." Illumi watched Hisoka's eyes meet Chrollo's. Chrollo's expression was that of instant recognition. Hisoka looked to Illumi, unsure of what to say or ask. He decided not to say anything.

Nobody else in the room seemed to notice the butler as they all slowly got up, ready to get this over with.

Prytania stepped through the door after Hisoka, to which Kikyo beamed.

"You look gorgeous, my dear!"

Prytania blushed and bowed her head slightly. "Thank you."

"Come, Illumi will walk with you as we proceed to the shrine." Kikyo grabbed her eldest son's arm and pulled him to where Prytania was standing, and taking the small blonde girl's arm, linked her to Illumi's elbow.

"Perfect!" Kikyo smiled and returned to her husband, linking her own arm to his, as the family made their way to the shrine.

...

Kalluto followed Milluki at the back of the family's procession to the shrine. Behind him, Illumi's butler, Hiro, walked with his hands behind his back. Kalluto glanced at the butler. His hair was black and it was combed and pressed downward in a dapper fashion. Something about him looked incredibly familiar. Kalluto turned back around and nudged his older brother, Milluki in the arm.

"What?" Milluki grumbled.

Kalluto responded in a whisper. "Mom didn't mention Illumi's new butler."

"Yeah. Hiro or something."

"Who recommended him?"

"I don't know. Why does it matter?"

"The familiar aura... I think I know this guy. His face looks familiar too."

"And?"

"Can you do a background check on him?"

"I don't do anything for free."

"I'll buy you a new figurine or something."

"I can buy my own figurines, thank you."  
"C'mon, Milluki there's gotta be something you want."

Milluki thought for a moment.

"I want a new monitor."

"you already have-"

"I want. Another. Monitor."

"Fine."

"Deal."

Kalluto and Milluki continued to walk in silence. Kalluto slowly turned to steal another glance at the butler. He knew he had seen him somewhere, he just couldn't put a finger on it.

…...

Prytania and Illumi kneeled _seiza-style_ in front of a low table with three cups stacked on top of each other, along with a bottle of sake. The family sat behind them in the same style, watching. Silva sat to the left of his wife, who sat to the left of Zeno. Kalluto and Milluki sat to the far right behind Prytania.

Chrollo sat across the table from Illumi and Prytania.

"We will now begin the san-san-kudo." Chrollo lifted the cups off of one another and poured sake into one. He made a motion like a prayer before setting one of the cups in front of Illumi.

"The first cup represents heaven. May the love between Illumi and..." Chrollo looked at the blonde girl and hesitated. "...and his bride. Illumi, you may sip three times from the first cup."

Illumi picked up the first cup and held it to his mouth. He couldn't feel Hisoka's presence anywhere in the room. He must have decided not to join the ceremony.

Illumi took the first sip.

He thought it made sense, usually only family members and the priest were the only persons present with the bride and groom during the different stages of the wedding. It still stung that Hisoka wasn't there.

Illumi took the second sip.

While inside the shrine, it was difficult to read any auras from outside. The family designed it that way to make it a more spiritual place inside the estate. He hated it. Hisoka could be right outside the shrine, waiting, or somewhere further and Illumi wouldn't be able to feel him.

Illumi took the third sip from the cup and set it down.

Chrollo moved the cup to sit in front of Prytania. "The... bride may now take three sips from the same cup."

Prytania took the cup and began her sipping. Illumi pulled a tiny piece of paper from his robe and scribbled something on it while Prytania sipped. Chrollo watched carefully as Illumi held up his message for Chrollo to see. Chrollo squinted to read it.

The note had an arrow and a name.

"- Prytania"

Chrollo nodded at Illumi in thanks.

Prytania set the cup down.

Chrollo pushed the second cup towards Illumi and looked on to the family behind them.

"The second cup represents Earth. May you both be blessed with wisdom in your marriage." Chrollo poured sake into a second cup and set it in front of Illumi. "You may take three sips from the second cup."

Illumi reached for the second cup.

 _This was really happening._

Illumi took the first sip.

 _He_ _was really going through with this._

Illumi took the second sip.

 _It was happening so fast._

Illumi took the third sip and set the second cup down.

"Prytania may now take three sips from the second cup."

Prytania's three sips seemed more rushed than the sips Illumi had just taken. She finished them and set the cup down.

Chrollo looked over to the family again.

"The third cup represents mankind. May you bring each other happiness."

Chrollo poured the third and final cup and placed it in front of Illumi, who lifted it and took the first sip.

He could do this, he reassured himself.

Illumi took the second sip.

At the end of everything, Hisoka would take him away from all of this. From the duties of his family and the image he had to hold up. They would be together.

Illumi took the third sip, and set the cup down.

"Prytania may now take the final three sips from the third cup."

Prytania lifted the cup to her lips. Illumi watched as Chrollo gently smiled at Prytania.

He could hear the door to the shrine open and close, followed by the rustle of everyone turning around to see who had interrupted the ceremony. He looked at Chrollo, who seemed confused, and then to Prytania, who looked back at him wondering if he had also heard someone walk in. Illumi and Prytania turned around to see Gotoh, whispering something to Kikyo and Silva. Kikyo stood up from her seat, her expression alarmed.

"Stop the wedding."

Illumi could feel his blood go cold. Something was wrong. He looked to Prytania to see if she knew anything, but she looked just as worried. When Illumi turned back around to look at his mother, he saw her approaching quickly. He watched as she slapped the cup from Prytania's hands, letting the cup hit the table and break as sake flew out and spilled onto the table and floor.

Hisoka came through the door, looking around for a moment before his eyes landed on Illumi, Prytania, and the Kikyo, who loomed over the kneeling couple.

A thousand thoughts ran through Illumi's mind as Kikyo pulled Prytania to her feet by the hems of her kimono. Had Gotoh found out about Hisoka?

Kalluto squinted at the man in the butler's uniform, but his attention tore away as Kikyo gripped Prytania's Kimono and pulled her closer.

"How do you know about Alluka?" Kikyo spoke in a low grumble, gritting her teeth as her small fists gripped tightly onto the fabric around Prytania's neck.

Illumi could swear he felt his heart stop. Prytania made sure not to look anywhere else but at Kikyo's face.

"Who's Alluka?" Prytania let out with a whisper.

"DON'T PLAY DUMB WITH ME!" Kikyo shrieked. Silva swooped in from behind Kikyo and pulled her off Prytania, who stood there, standing, shaking.

Illumi stood up and placed himself in front of Prytania, facing her.

"You can't tell them it was me." Illumi whispered.

"But-"

"Make something up."

Illumi looked at Prytania's face, shushing her. She had already started to form tears at the corners of her eyes.

Illumi turned to face his mother, but landed his eyes on Gotoh.

"What is the meaning of this interruption?" Illumi sounded authoritative.

Gotoh snapped his fingers at Hisoka, signaling him. Hisoka left the room for a moment and came back with another butler dragging in a kicking, screaming, and crying Amane to the room. They held her by her arms as she squirmed, and Hisoka looked at Illumi and Prytania with furrowed brows and a genuine frown as the young girl sobbed.

Gotoh turned back around to Illumi and Prytania. "Our dear Amane told us you know about Alluka."

"I don't know who that is." Prytania insisted.

"Who told you about Alluka?" Gotoh pressed on.

"Nobody!"

"Then how do you know about him?"

"I don't!"

"We know you do!"

Prytania panicked. "It was Amane!"

Illumi looked at Prytania with wide eyes.

Gotoh nodded. "Very well then. Gentlemen, take her away."

Amane shrieked "I didn't tell her anything! She already knew, I swear!" Hisoka and the other butler dragged her away as she kept screaming. Prytania started crying.

"Where are you taking her?!" Prytania sobbed.

Gotoh turned now to face the small woman in the white kimono. "To her execution."

Prytania's mouth gaped open as she realized what she had done- what she had sentenced Amane to. The weight of her mistake began creeping up on her, making her knees feel weak. Illumi grabbed her arm and held her up. She leaned on him, trying to cope.

"I- I didn't know! You don't have to do that to her, please!" Prytania cried out.

"She knew the rules. She broke them. The consequence is death." Gotoh spoke calmly before turning to leave. Prytania opened her mouth, ready to scream, ready to stop him, but Illumi squeezed her arm. She looked at him, and he looked at her through the corner of his eye. He still faced his parents and the problem at hand. Prytania closed her eyes and let Gotoh leave the room to follow Amane and the two butlers out.

When the doors were shut, the screaming stopped. She didn't know if it was because the doors were noise cancelling, or because Amane had already been silenced.

"She knows too much!" Kikyo yelled. "Are you some kind of spy?"

Zeno stood up. "What did you expect, Kikyo? She's a stranger. An outsider. You know we can't trust outsiders."

Prytania opened her eyes. She was in a state of the strangest peace she had ever known. Whatever choices she made now could not be worse than the ones she just made. She could lie and lie and lie now and nobody else's life was on the line but her own. Living in her sin she answered calmly, "I'm not a spy."

"How can you prove it?" Zeno questioned.

Prytania now looked to Illumi, who stepped in front of her.

"She's not a spy."

Zeno frowned. "You are not clear of mind, grandson."

Illumi could feel his blood becoming hot. He wasn't sure if it was because he was angry or if the sake was particularly strong. Either way, it was an unfamiliar feeling.

"I know what you think of me, grandfather, but she is not a spy. She's sincere in that she's here to do her job and that's it."

"We can't trust her now that she knows." Silva interjected.

"You trusted her with the location of our home. You trusted her with our butlers, and you trusted her with my life - and the life of our future children." Illumi defended.

Kikyo took a deep breath.

"What do you know about Alluka?" Kikyo asked quietly.

"I- I know that Alluka was your fourth child, and that there was something about them that led you all to kill them."

Kikyo and Silva shared a glance. Prytania continued to speak.

"I didn't mean to pry. I understand the lives of assassins are very different. I could not imagine what would lead you to be rid of one of your children, but I'm not yet a mother, so I cannot know." Prytania looked to Illumi to see if there was any sign that she was lying correctly. Illumi placed his hand on her back and patted it.

Kikyo stepped forward.

"Of course, I don't expect you to understand. Please do not think of us as monsters. Sure, we're assassins and we kill people, but we're a family with values just like any other.

Prytania nodded.

Zeno crossed his arms. "We cannot have a wedding on the same day as an execution. It is bad luck."

Chrollo spoke up from behind Illumi. "We cannot end san-san-kudo on the second cup, lest it bring even more bad luck."

Kikyo sighed as she glanced over to her father-in-law. "He has a point."

"Illumi I don't feel well." Prytania whispered to Illumi, clutching onto his garment. Illumi glanced back at Chrollo, who was standing now, face smug as ever. Illumi looked over to the cabinet where they kept their sake only to see the bottle that they owned for the shrine still sat on its shelf. He looked back to Chrollo who smiled as he realized he had made the connection.

"The antidote. Now." Illumi whispered to Chrollo.

"What are you on about?" Zeno asked, only briefly stealing Illumi's attention away from Chrollo.

"One sec." Illumi turned around and glared at Chrollo, who rolled his eyes and poured another cup of sake from a different bottle.

"I'm marrying this woman today." Illumi spoke to the family before turning to Prytania to whisper again. "Sip that three times. It's the antidote but make it look ceremonial."

Prytania nodded as she took the cup from Chrollo.

"Don't you dare drink that!" Kikyo exclaimed. She stepped forward only for Illumi to challenge her.

"She's not a spy."

Prytania took the first sip.

Zeno shouted. "If she turns out to be a spy then she will see the ruin of us all!"

Prytania sipped a second time.

"Silva, DO SOMETHING!" Kikyo shouted, but Prytania took the final sip.

"I now pronounce Illumi and Prytania, married!" Chrollo beamed. "The bride and bridegroom may now offer sake to their parents as a gesture of the new family bond!"

Prytania dropped the cup to the floor. Illumi felt her weight begin to lean more heavily on his side. He could see worry on his family's face as he turned to catch the falling Prytania.

"Prytania?" Illumi called out to her, catching her before she slumped to the ground.

"Chrollo!" Illumi yelled.

"She'll live." Chrollo shrugged. Suddenly, his body was pinned to the wall. He looked down to see Zeno, holding him by his collar.

"You have fifteen seconds to explain."

"Your daughter-in-law interrupted the san-san-kudo."

"What does that mean?"

"First cup represents heaven. Pure sake is served. The second cup represents earth and all its perils. Poison mixed with Sake is served."

"Chrollo!" Illumi's bloodlust swirled quickly throughout the room. Without Prytania, he wouldn't be able to leave, and from what he was understanding, Chrollo had just poisoned her.

Chrollo's sick smile was only interrupted by his laugh.

"Allow me to continue, friend." Chrollo raised an eyebrow. Illumi didn't get any calmer.

"The third cup represents the mankind and the bonds we make with each other. The third cup is spiked with a fast – acting antidote. It works best when taken right after the poison. Otherwise... there could be side effects."

"You POISONED her!"

"All in the name of ritualistic symbolism. Besides, I gave her the antidote. She would be awake right now if she had taken it sooner."

"But Gotoh interrupted..." Silva muttered. "What are you playing at?"

"I have no ill intentions. Congratulations to the happy couple!" Chrollo smiled. "Now, at this point we'd move to the reception but as the bride is currently feeling a tad drowsy I'd say we take a breather, no?"

The family watched as Chrollo walked out of the room nonchalantly.

"I'm gonna kill him." Zeno grumbled.

"The man doesn't even have Nen." Silva reminded.

"Nen or not he needs to die." Illumi's grandfather crossed his arms.

Kikyo kneeled next to Prytania and placed her hand gently on her forehead. "For once, old man, I agree with you. He literally poisoned Prytania."

Silva interjected. "Before we do any killing, take Prytania to get checked out. Illumi, go with her. Take a butler. Father: watch Chrollo. Don't kill him."

"I used to give you orders."

"You used to be the head of the family."

"Watch your tongue, son, lest I take it from you." Zeno left the room after Chrollo before Silva could get another word in.

…...

~Chapter 16, Fin~

...

I hated writing this chapter probably as much as you all hated reading it I knoooow.

Hang in there though! Good things to come ayyy.

Full disclaimer I've never been to a Japanese wedding before I had to look a ton of stuff up and I'm almost certain that normal ceremonies don't go like that at all LOL.

So I'm going to be travelling for about six weeks. I won't be working on any chapters during that time. I will return Mid-August and then I'll be posting shortly after that. Sorry in advance for the long wait.

I'll be back! Eventually! With a new chapter!

Until then,

Fluffy out.


	17. The New Butler

Hisoka and another butler dragged Amane down a corridor. Gotoh followed. Up ahead, a door opened. The light from the room was pale yellow. Hisoka could see Tsubone weeping and several butlers holding her back as she struggled to get to Amane. Hisoka glanced at the young girl he was currently dragging. She had quieted down now into a lethargic state. It seemed that she had reached a point of understanding that no matter how much she fought, she would not be saved. She didn't look up to meet her grandmother's eyes.

Hisoka wondered what normal people would feel right now in his position. Remorse? Guilt? Those things were foreign to him. He could feel regret, he knew what that felt like. He could feel regret for killing someone if they had potential. He could understand when killing someone would be a waste, but remorse was not something he knew. Guilt was vague for him, like a dull itch that was more of an annoyance than anything substantial. Even now, as he dragged this girl to her death for a crime she didn't commit, he felt nothing. Better her than him or Illumi. Better her than Prytania. He wasn't particularly content with it, he'd rather nobody die today, but if it had to be anyone - it was going to be this girl.

But what didn't sit well with him was his lacking faith in Prytania. Prytania may have a number of deaths under her belt, but she had nowhere near the same level of self-preservation that Hisoka or llumi had.

 _"That goody-goody is gonna get us found out. Unlike us this girl actually has a conscience."_

Gotoh interrupted Hisoka's thoughts as they reached a metal door at the end of the hallway. The family's head butler opened the door, dragging it across the floor causing it to screech. He stepped aside to let the two bring Amane inside.

As soon as Hisoka stepped into the small dungeon, his eyes grew wide with child-like wonder. Torture devices lined the wall on racks. There was a metal slab of a table with leather straps and a tray of sharp and shiny things. Scalpels, plyers, forceps... and was that a bone chisel? They gleamed in the dim lighting. Hisoka looked like a child at a toy store. Gotoh raised an eyebrow at him.

"Hiro."

Hisoka's eyes took in everything hungrily. All the things he could do with these instruments. If Hisoka was an artist and destruction of the human body was his medium, to him it was like looking at a brand-new set of paintbrushes.

"Ahem. Hiro?"

Hisoka snapped out of his wonder at the sound of his alias.

"Chain her up." Gotoh's voice was firm as it always was, but HIsoka recognized an uncertainty in his words.

Hisoka nodded and peered the wall, which had different chained cuffs on them in varying sizes. He looked at Amane's small wrists and chose a pair of cuffs that looked like they would fit her. He picked them up, trying to open them. Gotoh handed him a key. As soon as Hisoka had them unlocked, the other butler had brought Amane over. Her eyes were bloodshot and puffy. A rather disgusting state, Hisoka thought. He was just glad Prytania wouldn't be able to see her. She would lose her mind.

Hisoka backed away from Amane as the other butler locked her into place. Amane's arms were now held up by the chains and she slumped to her knees. The butler chained her feet to the wall behind her.

Gotoh cleared his throat. "Amane, you have been accused of distributing confidential information to outsiders."

Amane stayed silent.

Gotoh looked down at Amane from where he stood over her. "You have denied this accusation."

A single tear rolled down her face.

Gotoh sighed. "Due to the fact that we still have no proof, I will allow your punishment to be delayed."

Amane suddenly looked up at Gotoh, confused. Her eyes were wet again, they sparkled with something Hisoka could only describe as hope. He'd seen it many times, and each time it was always something to behold. Something precious. From the look on her face, Hisoka could tell that normally, an accusation this dire would grant immediate execution. Gotoh was offering her hope of freedom.

"You have one day of delay. If I cannot find anything that proves your innocence, the punishment will be carried out without further hesitation." Gotoh turned around to leave, beckoning the butler and Hisoka to leave with him. As they opened the door, Gotoh was met by Illumi's grandfather, Zeno, who stood at the door with his fist up as if he was getting ready to knock on the door before it opened.

"Ah, Gotoh! Please tell me you haven't already killed the poor girl?"

"Not as of yet. I've allowed for another day to investigate."

"Good. That was Silva's plan as well."

Gotoh nodded. "He's a wise man."

"As are you. But that's why you're our head butler."

Gotoh smiled and bowed his head at his old master.

All four of them left the room. Gotoh dismissed the two of them and locked the door behind them with one of his many keys.

...

Prytania stirred awake. All she could see was white- the lights in the room were so bright. Other colors became clearer as she began to focus. She was still wearing her wedding kimono, and she was in a bed. Not her own bed. She blinked a few times. She was in some kind of infirmary. A pain registered in her arm and she winced at it. It was an IV drip. She looked to her right and saw him, Illumi, looking out the window to the main house. He was calm, but he looked worried. She opened her mouth to speak, but her throat burned. She coughed instead. Illumi turned around and looked at her.

"Oh good, you're awake."

Prytania couldn't help but wish Illumi would run to her side. Comfort her, or check if she was okay. But the truth of his indifference rang like a loud bell. He stayed by the window, staring at her with his unforgiving black eyes. She kicked herself mentally for expecting anything caring from Illumi. He was cold, after all. He was an assassin. She knew that. She just hated that it still hurt.

"Chrollo has to be hiding somewhere on the grounds. It's absolutely ludicrous that nobody has found him yet."

"Are you angry with him?"

"He came here for another reason than to poison us. He had the antidotes with him and he would never have gotten away with killing you or me. I want to know his real reason for being here."

Prytania sighed. Illumi looked back out the window.

"So, how have your parent's taken it?"

"Taken what?"  
"That we're officially married now."

"The usual. My mother is being dramatic and my father is quietly contemplating the events."

Prytania chuckled to herself.

"Yeah. Dramatic is a good descriptive word for her."

"I told you that we should look into strengthening your immunity to poisons. You had the antidote and you still passed out. You won't survive long like this." Illumi half spoke half mumbled his words.

Prytania shivered at the thought of being subjected to a number of poisons. In the silence, she began to think about exactly what happened during the ceremony. Her skin grew pale when she remembered Amane.

"Amane!" Prytania sat up sharply and immidiatley regretted it. There was a sharp pain in her abdomen that resonated throughout her body. She yelped loudly, and suddenly she felt firm hands help her lay back down on the bed. Illumi tucked her tightly back in bed.

"Don't do that again."

Just then, the door opened. Kikyo stood in the doorframe. She looked at Illumi tucking in his new wife in the bed and sighed. "So you've really fallen for her this quickly?"

"Uh, yes?" Illumi answered his mother.

Kikyo sighed. "That's how it was with your father and I. Don't forget your duty. The contract is in motion so we expect a child within the first year, you understand?"

Illumi cleared his throat. "Mother, she's recovering."

"Fine. But as soon as she's better you have to-"

"I get it, mom."

"Watch your attitude, boy."

Illumi turned away from his mother and rolled his eyes. Prytania smiled. Kikyo left the room in an annoyed huff.

Illumi sat down on the bed. "Sorry, I know she's a real piece of work."

"She's right, though."

Illumi frowned.

"Once I'm better-"

"You should rest now. I'll see if I can find Hisoka and join the search for Chrollo." Illumi left the bedside and left the room quickly. Prytania laid her head down and stared at the ceiling until she fell asleep.

…...

Hisoka ran down the hallway, chasing a flash of black down a corridor. He knew it was him- Chrollo. His movements were fast, and he was concealing his presence. Hisoka's bloodlust grew as he continued to flirt with the possibility that Chrollo had his Nen back and that he was here to challenge him.

Hisoka saw the blur of his silhouette leave the mansion, so he followed it, running. It was night now, only the dim lamps and moonlight lit the path, but Chrollo had gone off the path and into the forest that engulfed the mountain.

Hisoka sliced through branches with a card. He stopped when he came to a clearing, and there he stood. Chrollo Lucilfer, still in his shinto priest getup. Hisoka smirked.

"Answer me, Chrollo: do you have your Nen back?"

"Yes."

Hisoka's heart raced in exhilaration. He'd waited so long for this moment.

"Uh-ah-ah!" Chrollo waved his finger. "If you release your Nen any further, that little brother of Illumi's is going to know you're here."

Hisoka concealed his presence, remembering where he was.

"That's better."

"Why are you here?"

"Judging by the actions of this evening's drama, you know why I'm here."

"No, I really don't."

Chrollo rolled his eyes. "The other Zoldyck Child."

"So, you knew about it?"  
"I looked through Kalluto's stuff. He had a picture of Kikyo and the rest of his brothers, except there was one extra. I couldn't really ask him about it. I kept thinking, why would they hide an entire person? Then Kalluto left because Illumi was getting married and I thought, 'Why not check it out?' I was also curious about how the hell Illumi was getting married to someone other than you. I got to say, on both accounts I've learned a lot."

"So, you just happened to also plan to poison Illumi and his bride?"

"I just wanted it to be a little fun. Also, I needed to see how weak she really was."

"When it comes to her immunity to poisons, she's as weak as they come. But make no mistake, she's no doormat."

"Did she really condemn that poor girl to death?"  
"Better her than us."

"Us?"

"Illumi, Prytania, and I are getting out of here."

"Why is she included?"  
"We need her."

"For what?"

"If her and Illumi have a kid, Illumi will be free to leave the mansion for good without his family coming to look for him."

"Woah- um. What?"

"Illumi's parents want grandchildren. They hired Prytania to-"

"I understand what Illumi's parents want but you're actually going through with it?"

"Well, yeah."

"You're going to let Illumi fuck some chick and knock her up? Are you serious?"  
"Don't say it like that."

"Well that's basically what you're saying to me!"

"Look, I've been through this process before for myself. It's really hands off after that."

"Yeah, but that was different. It was you. We're talking about Illumi here! Your lover or boyfriend or whatever he is to you! You two literally couldn't keep your hands off each other but now you're telling me that you're really okay with-"

"I'm not okay with it!"

Hisoka's heart sank with his confession. He admitted it, finally. Out loud. He wasn't okay with this. He hated it.

"It was one thing watching him leave to go marry her. I just can't think about it. If I do, I'll slit someone's throat. But Illumi's family means so much to him. He won't leave with me without being in good standing with them first."

Chrollo watched Hisoka sit down on a tree stump and hang his head on his hands. He looked tired. Drained, even.

"Is he worth it?"

"What?"

"Is he worth it? Is the life you plan to have with him worth it?"

"Without a doubt. He's everything."

"Gross, you really are in love with him."

"I thought we'd been over this."

"You'll never be able to kill me now."

"Excuse me?"

"Illumi is your weakness."

"You don't know what you're talking about."

"You'd do anything to protect him."

"He doesn't need protecting."

"No, but if he has a kid, he's going to spend a great deal of energy protecting it. The kid, and his wifey."

"He's just having a kid to please his family."

"Is that what you believe? You think Illumi, mister family man, is going to abandon his kin like you did yours?"

Hisoka stayed quiet. Chrollo continued. "He's going to love whatever kid comes out of that woman because it's family. You and I both know that family means everything to Illumi... and they are _his_ weakness."

"Shut up."

"You'd do anything for Illumi, and if Illumi has a weakness, _you_ have a weakness."

"I said shut up!"

Chrollo smirked. "Take now, for instance. Here I am. My Nen is back and I'm more than willing to fight you... but if you fight me you'd reveal yourself to the Zoldyck family and ruin Illumi's chance at ever leaving this place."

"You'll never be able to kill me with that girl around... So, I'll ask again. Is it worth it?"

Thoughts swirled in Hisoka's mind. Chrollo was right, but Hisoka knew something wasn't adding up. Chrollo was deliberately trying to throw him off – jumble up his thoughts so he wouldn't be able to think straight. He hated to admit it was working.

"What are you doing here, Chrollo?"

"I already answered that question!"

Hisoka mumbled to himself. "There's no way you would have any idea about the other Zoldyck child before today."

"What?"

"There's absolutley no way you would have any idea about the other Zoldyck child before today. Kalluto would have known if you snooped through his belongings. That can't be the reason you came here and I know you're not here to taunt me."

"Don't think too hard, you might hurt yourself. Besides, aren't you just so happy to see me? Maybe I wanted to visit my old roommates."

It hit Hisoka that whatever Chrollo was here for, he wouldn't tell him, and if he guessed it right, Chrollo would try to kill him. He needed to leave.

"Chrollo, you should probably let me escort you to a guest room."

"Why?"

"They're on a manhunt for you. If they find you I can't guarantee they'll keep you alive for long."

"Yeah, right. You'll take me to safety just like you took that girl to her death? I don't think so."

"Right now, you're alive because technically you didn't kill anyone, but now they're not going to let you leave because you know too much."

"That's why I'm out here."

"You won't be able to hide forever."

"I'll escape."

"No, you won't. Trust me, they-"

"Trust you? Not for a second."

"Come on, Chrollo. Illumi and I are your only allies here."

"Illumi, maybe. Not you."

"Fine, don't trust me. Trust the fact that if something happens to you, Illumi will actually be sad."

"No, he won't."

"He asked me not to fight you."

"What?"

"He asked me not to fight you." Hisoka repeated.

Chrollo half-smiled. "He asked me not to fight you. I told him fat chance." He cares about you. You and I were his first friends outside of family."

"I was just a client to him."

"Before, yes. But you haven't been his family's client in a while. Shit, he let you perform his wedding ceremony."

"Because I was the only priest!"

"He could have told his family that he didn't invite you and they would have killed you then and there. You against Every Single Zoldyck? You're strong but not that strong."

"I'm not going with you, Hisoka."

"Shh!" Hisoka looked over his shoulder instinctivley.

"What?"

"My butler name is Hiro. If you call me by my name and someone hears you..."

"Hiro? Really?"

"Shut up, it starts with an H."

Chrollo sighed. "Did Illumi really ask you not to fight me?"

"He did."

"What an idiot. He knew the answer already."

"He still asked."

Chrollo uncrossed his arms. "Fine. I'll come with you. But any funny business and I'll out you."

"Fair enough."

Chrollo followed Hisoka back into the mansion.

…...

KIkyo paced the family room while Silva sat with Gotoh.

"I don't believe Amane told Prytania anything about Alluka." Gotoh spoke calmly.

"I agree. Amane is loyal just like her grandmother. The problem is, we still don't know how Prytania got the information." Silva's brows were furrowed with concern as he spoke.

"Then there's that priest- that Chrollo! He shows up out of nowhere and poisons the girl."

"That might be a different matter." Silva tried to calm his wife.

Gotoh held his chin. "What if it isn't a different matter? What if it's connected?"

Kikyo gasped. "Yes! What if-"

"Don't start conspiracy theories now. Kikyo is already wired up."

The three of them looked up as they heard steps approaching. Illumi, his butler Hiro, and Chrollo came into the room.

"Mom, Dad, Gotoh. I told Prytania about Alluka."

Kikyo's jaw dropped. "Wha- Why?"

"It was an accident. We were talking about my family and I slipped and said I had four brothers instead of three."

Gotoh stood from his chair. "Why didn't you say anything earlier?! Amane was dragged off to be executed and you said nothing!"

Silva stood up and placed his hand on Gotoh's shoulder. "You will mind your place when you are speaking to My son."

"Forgive me, master." Gotoh bowed apologetically to Illumi.

Silva looked to Illumi. "He has a point, however. You were fine with letting Amane be executed?"

"Mother asked Prytania where she heard about Alluka. When she said Amane, I thought she had said something more than what I had already told her. I didn't know that Prytania had asked Amane more questions."

"She asked Amane questions?" Silva raised his brow.

"She was just curious." Illumi started.

"Her nosiness is going to get her killed!" Kikyo raised her voice.

"Please, no." Illumi pleaded.

"Your mind is clouded!" Silva asserted.

"I won't marry anyone else!" Everyone grew quiet after Illumi raised his voice.

Silva crossed his arms. "The moment she becomes more of a threat to us, we won't show mercy."

"I understand, father."

"Do you?" Silva asked.

"Completely."

Kikyo glanced over to Chrollo.

"And what about this one? He tried to poison your new wife."

"He poisoned me, too."

"What?!" Silva, Kikyo, and Gotoh all said at once.

"He was following a weird tradition, I know, but he thought because she was marrying into the Zoldyck family that she would have a better built up immunity to poisons. The dosage wasn't enough to kill right away and the antidote was in the third cup."

Gotoh stood. "But now he knows about Alluka."

Silva nodded. "We can't let him leave."

"My thoughts exactly." Illumi said. Kikyo and Silva exchanged a confused glance. Illumi continued, "I was thinking, we can't let him leave, but he's my friend and it'd be a shame to kill him."

"So, what do you propose?" Gotoh asked.

"Let's make him a butler."

"No."

"Absolutely not."

"Not a chance."

"Prytania will need a personal assistant. Hiro can look after her while Chrollo tends to me."

Kikyo and Gotoh scoffed.

"That's completely improper!" Kikyo blurted.

Gotoh nodded. "What Prytania needs is a chambermaid. I'll arrange for one of the female butlers to attend to her."

"I don't see what's so improper about it. Gotoh is mother's personal servant, after all."

Gotoh swallowed.

Kikyo exhaled. "That's completely different. We know Gotoh. He's trustworthy. Your butler Hiro has only been with us for less than a week and Chrollo poisoned your bride!"

"Fine, then I want them both as my personal butlers."

"What do you need TWO butlers for?"

"Things and stuff."

Gotoh huffed. "Forgive me, Illumi. But earlier this evening you almost let one of your butlers be executed. A butler that has spent a majority of her life serving your family. Now you want me to train this man who has tried to steal your grandfather and your father's powers before, and poisoned your bride?"

"Yes. I want him to serve me. I want to make his life a living hell."

Hisoka noticed the glimmer of amusement in Gotoh's eyes. "I think it's a splendid idea." Gotoh smiled.

"What?!" Kikyo shrieked.

Silva nodded. "Quite the punishment."

"Serving my boy isn't a punishment! Right, Hiro?"

Before Hisoka could get a word out, Gotoh interrupted.

"Hiro's only been here a few days and Tsubone has already had to completely replace his first uniform because Illumi threw him in the tub."

"Illumi!" Kikyo said, shocked.

Illumi smirked. "And I wasn't trying to be particularly unpleasant."

Hisoka facepalmed, knowing the real reason why he needed his uniform replaced.

Kikyo fumed. "This is ridiculous!"

Silva place a hand on the small of his wife's back. "Kikyo, the other option would be to kill him."

"Why not kill him?"

A voice from behind startled Kikyo. "Because we don't kill people who aren't targets." Zeno stepped further into the family room, his voice stern and his movement slow. "That wouldn't be assassination it would be a senseless murder. And we, the Zoldycks, aren't classless, low-life murderers."

Kikyo breathed slowly out her nose, trying to calm the heat of her anger.

Zeno calmly looked at her and tilted his head. "I believe what your boy suggests is the best course of action."

Illumi was touched and a little bit surprised at his grandfather's remark.

Silva sighed. "Is it settled then?"

Gotoh nodded and looked to Kikyo.

"Fine." Kikyo seemed to be rolling her laser eye as she crossed her arms and pouted like a child.

Gotoh's shoulders relaxed. "Then I shall take Mister Lucilfer to the servant's quarters. We'll begin your training in the morning."

Chrollo glanced at Illumi and then to Hisoka. He had stayed silent this entire time, probably to better his chances at survival. He nodded at Gotoh before following him out of the room.

Kikyo sighed again. This time looking to Hisoka. "Hiro, I'd like you to check in on Prytania."

Hisoka nodded and smiled politley. As he exited the room, Kikyo lowered her arms and breathed out, seemingly becoming more at ease. Illumi knew she wasn't completely happy still, but when would she ever be?

"Mother, thank you."

She nodded shallowly in response. Zeno approached Illumi.

"Illumi, my eldest grandson, may you continue to grow in wisdom."

"Thank you, grandfather."

"Trust me, you'll need all the wisdom you can get. Especially with a new wife."

Illumi looked down at his grandfather, puzzled.

Zeno's concern radiated in his voice. "Don't slip up again."

Illumi nodded. Zeno bore his gaze into his grandson, who stared back at him with matching unrelenting stubbornness.

"Well, normally we would have moved to dinner in a celebration of this marriage, however since the bride is not well I feel we should retire for the night."

"I agree."

Illumi had enough of being in the same room as his parents and grandfather. It had become too much, too tiring. He left quickly, rushing through the hallways back to his room. He slammed the heavy wood door behind him and sighed, closing his eyes and letting his head roll back.

"Stressful day?" Hisoka's voice was comforting to Illumi. He smiled and opened his eyes. He was already imagining a long night of letting Hisoka just hold him, to let all the stress of the day melt away, but when his eyes landed on Hisoka, who sat on his bed, he also saw Prytania, laying under the blankets, tucked in and looking back at him.

Illumi cleared his throat. "I thought I told you not to get out of bed."

"You said no such thing." Prytania said smugly. "Besides, I'm technically in a bed."

"My bed."

"Our bed. I've been officially moved into your room." Prytani moved her eyes to the left of the room, and Illumi followed her gaze to see all her pink suitcases were now indeed, in his room. His last sanctuary in the entire mansion, now sullied.

Illumi didn't look back to either Prytania or Hisoka. He simply turned around and left the door with a slam, ignoring the whining Prytania's protests. He walked down the hallway of his enormous home, nothing more than an obscenely ornate prison to him. Even the parts of the castle that were bare stone and tapestries, once comfortably simple, now made his head spin.

He wanted to take Hisoka and run. Run away. But that would be foolish. His family would only come after him and play dirty tricks like they had before. He hated it. And now, instead of being able to marry Hisoka, he was married to some woman. He thought he could go through with it, but actually seeing her in his bed and all her things in his room made him want to vomit. His head was spinning, but he snapped out of it when he saw Milluki walking by with a file wrapped in his hands, holding on to it for dear life. He was obviously trying to hide it from Illumi.

Illumi stopped his younger brother. Milluki tried to get around him, but agility was never his strong suit.

"What do you have there?"  
"Nothing."

Illumi raised his brow.

Milluki sighed. "It's a background check on your new butler."

"Oh? Hiro?"

"Yeah, that's the thing, Illumi. I don't think his real name is Hiro."

Illumi frowned. "Interesting. What makes you think that?"

"He has absolutely no history. Nothing. I searched databases all over. There's not even a traffic ticket on him."

"Databases don't really exist where he's from."

"Yeah, Mother told me he was from Meteor City. I know trying to find anyone there is usually a black hole, but people from Meteor City don't ever stay there for long. They usually leave and rack up some kind of trail elsewhere. This guy though, is completely clean. He doesn't even have a single credit card in his name. No paper trails. No apartment, nothing."

Illumi smirked. "That certainly raises a few questions."

"I'll say."

"For you."

"Huh?"

"Did mother ask you for this background check?"

"No, Kalluto did."

Illumi could feel himself becoming anxious. "Then, did Kalluto ask you to hide this background check from me even though it concerns My butler and therefore my safety?"

"Well, yeah. I think he didn't want to alarm you."

"Right. Well, then..."

Before Milluki knew what had happened, Illumi struck a needle into his head.

"Forget everything regarding this background check."

Milluki's eyes glazed over as Illumi made quick work of hypnotizing him. He nodded and his arms went limp, letting the file he was holding fall to the floor.

"Good. Now, go back your room and play some video games."

MIlluki nodded again and turned about-face. As he walked away, Illumi picked up the file. He walked over to a large living room and tossed it into a fireplace. He usually hated that mother asked the butlers to keep the fire burning year-round, but right now, he appreciated it. He watched the papers burn into nothing before leaving the ashes and embers.

…...

Hisoka poured Prytania hot tea.

"Do you take sugar?"

"Yes, please."

"How many?"

"Just one."

Hisoka added a sugar cube to her tea and stirred it in. Prytania watched as he brought the cup and saucer over to her.

"Look at you." Prytania smiled.

"What?"

"Acting like a real butler. It's just funny to me."

"Why is that?"

"You're a serial killer."

Hisoka raised a brow. "Serial killers don't pour tea?"

"No, that's not it. You're just, awfully kind... and saner than I would have imagined." Prytania sipped her tea and burned her mouth. She winced at the pain, but instead of blowing on it to make it cool, continued to drink it.

"I think your judgment is a little wrong. I'm not the least bit as sane as you think I am." Hisoka thought back to the room he saw earlier that evening with all the instruments – how exhilarating it made him feel just to look at them and imagine all the things he could do. If Prytania had seen that, she probably wouldn't be saying what she was saying.

"I'll admit I'm just surprised by your capacity to act normal. Kind, even."

"Pouring your tea isn't kindness. You need to be well again so you can-"

"He won't even talk about that with me."

"Yeah he looked a bit touchy. Today was stressful. He's probably not even ready to think about it yet."

Prytania sighed and sipped her tea.

"You know, Tsubone took about thirty minutes to show me how to pour tea properly I thought I might as well get use out of that lesson."

"Ah! So that's why." Prytania laughed. She set her tea down into the saucer and leaned back into the pillows that propped her up. "Illumi is so difficult to talk to sometimes. It's like he's in another world. He's just always so serious."

"That's how most people view him." Hisoka paused. "Beyond his cold exterior he likes to put on, he's a raging fire."

"It's hard to see sometimes."

"You don't know him like I do."

"I guess you're right. You're the only person that's ever actually fucked him." Prytania laughed nervously. Hisoka smiled, but he looked down at the floor as he leaned against a wall.

"I hate everything about this." Hisoka sighed.

Prytania frowned. "I do too. If I wasn't Pariston's daughter, I could have maybe found a life outside this company. I never would have known about the terrible things they do and the business deals they make. Maybe I could have been normal."

"You'd still be a goody-two-shoes. I could see you being a hippie, even. Chaining yourself to trees. Fighting a lost cause. Yep. That'd be you."

Prytania laughed boisterously. "Maybe I'd burn a few bras, too."

"Oh, are you kidding? That'd be the first thing you'd do right after protesting cruelty to animals."

Prytania smiled, but Hisoka could tell it was bittersweet. "I wish I could do all those things. Make the world a better place. But here I am, married to a family of assassins and drinking tea poured for me by my serial killer butler."

"The way you word it makes it sound like I poisoned your tea."

"I mean I've already been poisoned once today by our international thief of a priest."

Hisoka laughed.

Prytania picked up her cup and brought it to her mouth, sipping once more. "My life sounds like a bad work of fiction."

Hisoka poured himself a cup of tea with no sugar. He leaned his back against a wall, looking at his lover's wife, who frowned at the state of her life. "We need to talk about you."

"About me?"

"You're too- uh, good."

"I'm too good?"

"Yeah, you have a conscience."

"Normal people have a conscience."

"Yeah that could bite us in the butt. I saw your face when we took Amane away."

"I thought she was going to be killed! I felt guilty!"

"Yes, I know. That's the problem. If something like that happens again, your expressions could be a dead giveaway. You need to learn self-preservation above all else. I know you already have some training on controlling your expression. You have the ability to continue smiling even through awkward conversations."

Prytania nodded, eating Hisoka's words for the nutrition they gave her.

Hisoka continued. "Instead of smiling, you'll need to keep a straight face through everything. Just like Illumi."

"Just like Illumi." Prytania repeated.

Hisoka gulped the last of his tea down. "Always remember that it's me, you, and Illumi that you need to keep alive. Above anything else, your self-preservation includes us. Don't do anything that could put Illumi or I in jeopardy."

Prytania nodded. Hisoka set down his tea cup and sauntered over to the bedside to take Prytania's cup as well. Illumi opened the door to his room slowly and looked at the two of them. Illumi wouldn't admit it, and he would certainly never show anything on his face, but he knew seeing them together still stung no matter how much Hisoka told him he loved him.

Hisoka was the first to break the silence. "Would you like some tea?"

Illumi almost smiled at the offer. "Not right now."

Hisoka nodded and took the two empty tea cups back to their set. He placed them on a tray.

"I need to take this back."

Illumi waved at Hisoka to stop. "You can do that later."

Hisoka watched as Illumi walked slowly over to the bed. Illumi seemed like his mind was elsewhere, eyes not really focusing on any particular point. He reached the bed and crawled onto it. Prytania held her breath, not sure what to do or say. Illumi plopped his body down on the bed on top of the covers and closed his eyes. Prytania and Illumi exchanged looks, not sure of what to do at this point.

HIsoka walked over to the bed and tucked Illumi under a heap of blankets. Prytania watched, astonished at the sheer amount of blanket.

"He likes to be cozy." Hisoka responded to the question burning on Prytania's mind before turning to leave.

"Should I do something?"

"Just let him sleep. Oh, and if he tries to kill you in his sleep just flick him in the forehead."

"What?"

"Nothing. Good luck!"

Hisoka grabbed the tea tray and left the room smirking. Prytania eyed Illumi, wondering if Hisoka was joking about Illumi possibly sleep-assassinating her. She decided it would be best to simply fall asleep and deal with it if the problem arose.

...

Hisoka left the tray in the kitchen and made his way to the servant's quarters. He knew it was way past his designated curfew but the only butler who ever checked was Tsubone. He doubted she would be in any mood to grill him for being a little late. He stepped into the building that housed all the butlers. There was a common room there, much like any living room with several couches and a few tables. There were butlers practicing what seemed to be a trick using coins. He was tempted to sit and watch them, but his specialty was in cards, not coins. Instead he made his way up to his room.

As much as he hated staying so far away from Illumi, at least he still had his own bed. Illumi was going to have to share his. Hisoka pitied him in a way. He was going to have to spend his nights with her even if he didn't want to. It was as if Illumi was trapped with a roommate imposed on him by his family. In fact, that was exactly what it was. Hisoka reached his room and pulled out his key to unlock it. Once the lock was undone, he moved his hand on the knob to turn it. As the door opened, he realized something wasn't right. The room was empty except for the curtains on the window frame. Everything else- the bed, the chair and table, the dresser – was all gone.

"What in the-"

"In light of the events of tonight..." Gotoh's voice was calm. Hisoka tried not to act too startled. He was growing accustomed to the members of the Zoldyck family and their servants sneaking up behind him. "...Chrollo Lucilfer will need a Chaperone."

Hisoka looked at the head butler, searching for the words to ask him politely what the fuck was going on.

"You will be rooming with the new butler. I've already had the liberty of moving the furniture to a larger room to accommodate the two of you."

"Fantastic."

"Glad you think so. Come, this way."

Gotoh walked past Hisoka further down the hallway. Hisoka cursed his luck. He hated rooming with Chrollo in his own apartment, he could only imagine how grueling living with him as a butler in the servants' quarters would be.

Gotoh reached into his right pocket and pulled out a ring holder with a comical number of keys on it. A section of the ring had keys on it which looked identical to each other from where Hisoka stood. Gotoh thumbed through them, and Hisoka could see they were numbered. He found the right key that corresponded with the room and unlocked the door.

Gotoh opened the door and saw Chrollo sitting in the corner at the desk, staring at a spinning penny.

"If I knew you were in here I would have simply knocked."

"Maybe you should start with that next time." Chrollo spoke without looking up from his penny. The coin slowly lost momentum.

Hisoka walked over to the desk and placed his finger on the penny to stop it in its place.

"Hey!"

"So. We're roomies."

"Yup."

"Don't scratch up the desk."

Gotoh cleared his throat. "I can already tell this arrangement is going to work out swimmingly. I'll leave your copy of the key on the dresser."

Hisoka nodded and watched as Gotoh placed an envelope on the surface of the wooden dresser. He left without another word.

"So."

"So."

Hisoka stood there, looking at Chrollo. His face was a punchable one. His lips curled at the sides ever so slightly.

"I want the bed near the window."

"Already claimed it."

"I'll kill you."

"Over a bed?"

"Let's get one thing straight," Hisoka said, one hand on his hip and the other hand pointing a finger at Chrollo. "I'd sell you to Satan for one corn chip."

"How heartwarming. Fine, take that bed."

Hisoka turned away from Chrollo to begin preparing for bed. Chrollo used the shower after him. He kept his distance, but it still bothered the living hell out of Hisoka. Even when they roomed together in his apartment, Hisoka had his own bathroom. Not to mention how different it was back then. Chrollo didn't have his Nen, and he couldn't taunt him like he did now. Hisoka's entire body itched for a fight. His fingertips were restless. Even as he brushed his teeth, he saw a glimpse of Chrollo in the mirror and it pissed him off all the more.

He laid in bed facing the window. This room didn't have the same view of the castle the way the other room had, but at least he didn't have to look at Chrollo. His leg bounced as he tried to clear his mind.

He could hear his own heart beating in his ears. It was beyond frustrating. Restless. Impatient. He tried to slow his breathing. Nothing was working. What kind of power had Chrollo stolen? How incredible and satisfying would it be to finally fight him? One thing was for certain: if he did fight him, he couldn't be sure he'd win. The thought tickled him. His blood raced. Dear God he was so tired. He needed to sleep but the excitement scratched at him like nails underneath his skin.

His mind started going off in different directions, trying to focus on something else. If Illumi could see him in this state while trying to sleep Hisoka was sure Illumi would put him in a headlock and make him pass out. Illumi... Hisoka's mind landed on Illumi's sleeping face under a mountain of blankets. Hisoka breathed in, thinking of his lover's peaceful face. He wished he could be beside him then. He pictured him now, still asleep in the clothes from the wedding. Hisoka chuckled to himself. Poor Illumi was so exhausted. Before Hisoka even knew it, his whole body had calmed. He drifted to sleep.

...

Gotoh entered the dungeon. He shivered at the coldness of the room. Amane seemed to be asleep despite the fact that it looked like the chains had cut into her wrists. It looked like it hurt.

He sighed as he moved to a cabinet on the side of the door. He pulled out a first aid kit from the top shelf and gently closed the cabinet door. Setting the kit aside he moved to unchain Amane. She stirred but didn't wake. Gotoh picked up her limp sleeping body and carried her to the metal table.

"If you're not awake now, you will be." Amane's eyes flittered open and closed. Gotoh picked up a cotton swab and a antiseptic.

"Amane, you're not going to like this, but I can't let you die of infection." Gotoh sprayed the antiseptic on Amane's wrists, and she woke up and winced at the pain, looking first at her wrists and then at Gotoh.

He covered the cuts with bandages before moving to her other side to do the same to her other wrist.

He held the spray bottle above her wrist and paused, looking at her. She nodded and bit her lip as he sprayed the liquid on her. She squeezed her eyes shut at the stinging sensation. He dressed the cut with more bandages. Keeping his eyes only on his work, he spoke. "You've been found innocent."

Amane's eye grew wide. She wanted to swallow, but her throat was dry. "By whom?" Amane hated how hoarse her voice sounded.

"Illumi came forward."  
"illumi?"  
"He's the one who told Prytania in the first place. That's how she knew."

Amane's brows furrowed. "Why didn't he say anything sooner?"

"That's not a question for me."

Amane rested her head back on the table and exhaled.

"I thought Prytania was nice. Grandmother was right. She blamed me even though it was Illumi. I never should have trusted her."

"It's not your fault. She's a problem."

"What?"  
"I don't buy her lies. She's up to something."

"You probably shouldn't say something like that against Illumi's new wife."

Gotoh looked Amane in the eyes and she froze. "Our job is to protect this family. I believe she is a threat."

Amane nodded. Gotoh released her hand and placed his hand under her shoulder. "Sit up. You'll need proper rest."

"For what?"

"You'll see. For now, go to your grandmother. She needs to see you."

Amane nodded. Gotoh helped her off the table and led her out the room. He placed the first aid kit back into the cabinet before leaving, making sure the cold dungeon was tidy. He remembered the first time he came into this room and saw all the wondrous toys. He was much younger then. He probably would have been a serial killer if he hadn't dedicated his life to the Zoldyck family. Gotoh's thoughts drifted to the look on Illumi's new butler's face. What was his name again? Hiro? Hiro. Gotoh could see so much of himself in that new butler. He was loyal to Illumi, that much he could tell. But something else about him unnerved him. There was a red flag somewhere but h couldn't put his finger on it. Between all that had happened today and Chrollo becoming a new butler, Gotoh's mind wasn't as sharp.

"Perhaps some rest will do me some good…" Gotoh whispered aloud to himself. "I'll figure you out, Hiro." Gotoh left the dungeon.

…..

Chapter 17, fin-

…

Hello my pretties!

Guess who's back, back again

Fluffy's back! Tell a friend~

That's right I'm back from my world travels and I gotta say whooooo boy did I miss writing this story.

Like honestly I couldn't wait to come back home and finish this chapter.

Lemme know what you guys think!

Good things to come! Stay tuned.

...

Bonus:

Prytania felt a weight shift on the bed. She stirred a little, opening her eyes. It was dark in the room, the only light peaking through the slit in the dark curtains was moonlight. The room was big, but it seemed even bigger now in the dark. The shadows seemed to move. She felt panic arise from somewhere in her instincts. A cold sweat seized her as she felt someone watching. She reached over to wake Illumi, but as she pressed her hand down into the heap of blankets, it sunk into the empty covers. A sickly dread washed over Prytania. She quickly turned around, sensing danger. Something was coming right at her at an inhuman speed. She didn't give herself time to think or doubt. Her arm outstretched in the dark. She curled her middle finger, touching it with her thumb and flicked it forward. Her finger hit her target- Illumi's forehead. The air was silent for a second, but was interrupted by soft chuckling. Prytania reached over to the nightstand and yanked the chord to turn on the lamp. Illumi stood at the edge of the bed laughing.

"I can't believe you actually tried that."

Prytania was too tired to even feel embarrassed. She would give both Hisoka and Illumi hell in the morning. "Go the fuck to sleep."

"Yes ma'am!" Illumi said, mockingly before waltzing over to his side of the bed and diving beneath the blankets.


	18. Exodus

**Read note at the end of chapter**

The Kitchen Butlers rose before the sunrise each morning, and today was no different. Hisoka was among them, leaning on a wall waiting for the water for Illumi's morning tea, taking in the sights and smells of the kitchen. Everyone moved with a quickness, making the quiet hallways bustling with movement. Flashes of butler uniforms passed before Hisoka's sleepy eyes. They hurried here and there, meaningless people hustling to please their masters. He smirked at their simple obedience.

He observed them all for a moment too long, lingering on their movements. He knew they all knew how to use Nen. There was a young boy chopping vegetables nearby, his hand moving so quickly it seemed nothing more than a tan blur in front of him. Hisoka eyed him, the young boy even reminded him a little of Gon. Hisoka couldn't deny that his youth and his speed would make for an interesting fight should they come to blows. Such a shame his natural talents would be wasted upon something so trivial as cooking food. Most of the butlers Hisoka observed were astronomically good at performing whatever job it was that they did, but he could sense that their lack of combat would give him the obvious upper hand in a duel. Even Gotoh seemed weak. Taking one of them on at a time wouldn't be much fun at all. But taking them all on at once... that was a different thought altogether.

Hisoka was startled out of his thoughts by a sudden presence invading his space. He looked over to see Chrollo leaning on the wall next to him, his eyes moving over the bustling kitchen.

"You see their potential too, don't you?" Chrollo spoke first without breaking his stare.

Hisoka's brows furrowed at Chrollo, who didn't seem to notice. Hisoka sighed and crossed his arms as he returned his gaze to the other butlers. "I see pitiful sheep."

Chrollo scoffed at Hisoka's comment. "Sheep are not pitiful. And by the look on your face I know you were just calculating how many of them you could kill in order to get some kind of rush."

"I don't get my kicks from killing people, contrary to popular belief."

"That's a lie and you know it."

Hisoka shifted his weight to one foot. "I enjoy a good fight. One where the stakes are high. Something interesting. I thought you knew this already."

"All the same, you still enjoy killing. When you get riled up on the promise of a good fight, the only way to quell your thirst for blood is killing. It doesn't matter who. If you only enjoyed fighting, you would be satisfied besting the other person and being done with it. But you don't leave survivors. You enjoy killing them too much. You like to watch the life leave their eyes. You're a common serial killer."

Hisoka glanced at the wobbling teapot, then back to Chrollo. He cleared his throat and said, "You said sheep are not pitiful. What did you mean by that?" Hisoka asked, hoping to change the subject.

"Sheep are noble creatures."

Hisoka couldn't help but laugh. Chrollo smiled. "Laugh all you want. I know better."

Hisoka calmed himself after getting side glances from other butlers for his noise. "Ahem. Please explain. I've got to hear this."

"On their own, sheep are quite stupid. They'll run in circles following the sheep in front of them trying to get out of the rain. They are preyed upon constantly, and they can't be used to ride on like a camel or a horse."

"I thought you were making a case on why you think sheep are, and I quote, 'noble creatures,' not to talk them down."

"They depend entirely on the people who care for them."

"And that makes them noble?"

"Sheep are almost the aristocrats of the animal kingdom. They can't survive on their own, and they don't even know that they can't survive on their own. They're that stupid. They are a creature that inherently needs a shepherd, someone to guide them and feed them and sheer them when their wool becomes too burdensome. Their survival and happiness depend entirely on someone else. Once they have a shepherd, they don't need to worry about themselves. Once they have that, they have it made."

"What if their shepherd is evil and lets them die?"

Chrollo smiled. "Then a new shepherd must take control and guide them away from harm."

The teapot's whistle began to blow, and Hisoka lifted it off the burner as he listened to Chrollo speak.

"So then do you think these sheep need a new shepherd?"

"Unlike you, I don't see the butlers as sheep. I simply didn't want you to disrespect the animal as 'pitiful creatures,' as you put it."

"Then what do you see them as?"

"People." Chrollo smiled at Hisoka before stepping away, leaving Hisoka to his duty.

Hisoka scoffed quietly at the thought. Chrollo, the leader of one of the most ruthless international gang of theives who were responsible for the complete wipeout of clans and murder of countless others, would think to value human life.

Hisoka mumbled under his breath as he prepared a tray for Illumi's tea. "What game is he playing at?"

…...

Hisoka allowed himself into Illumi's room silently. Illumi was already awake and getting dressed. Prytania slept quietly with a fluffy pink sleep mask over her eyes.

As she breathed quietly, Hisoka observed as Illumi chose an outfit for the day. Hisoka knew without a doubt that Illumi could sense his presence in the room, but Illumi kept himself focused on his wardrobe.

Hisoka crept up close and leaned on the frame of the sliding door of the closet, studying Illumi.

"Morning," Illumi offered a hint of a smile.

"Hey." Hisoka's thoughts swirled. Last night, Chrollo revealed he had his Nen back, and threatened Prytania's life. Hisoka didn't care if Prytania died, but he knew she had to stay alive if Illumi was ever to have a life outside his family's grasp. Then there was the matter of this morning's exchange. Chrollo was being cryptic as ever, and he hated the way the other butlers seemed to know something he didn't.

"Hisoka? You okay?" Illumi approached Hisoka, but Hisoka's mind was still somewhere else. He didn't even hear Illumi call his name. All he could think about was Chrollo's words. Chrollo was clear and right about one thing, Illumi was his weakness.

"Hisoka?" Illumi stepped right in front of Hisoka, snapping him back into reality. Hisoka's eyes surveyed Illumi's face for a moment. He could tell Illumi was worried. Hisoka realized he'd been staring at nothing and saying nothing.

"Oh, sorry. Did you sleep well?"

"I should be asking you that. You're spacing out on me. Are you okay?"

"I..." Hisoka paused.

"Don't even think about lying to me." Illumi commanded. His black eyes squinted ferociously.

"My head's not on straight today. Sorry." Hisoka inhaled and broke eye contact with Illumi by staring at the impressive closet.

"Did something happen?" Illumi moved himself to meet Hisoka's eyes, even if he didn't want to. There was no escaping those unforgiving black orbs and their seemingly endless gape.

"Yeah, but it's nothing."

"What is it?" Illumi insisted.

"Probably just... staying with Chrollo again. It gets me antsy."

Illumi watched Hisoka closely for any sign of faltering in his speech. "You still want to fight him, don't you?"

"Y-yeah." Hisoka sighed.

"Well right now you can't. He doesn't even have his Nen back. So, don't worry about it."

Illumi's words stung Hisoka. He knew Chrollo had threatened Illumi if he said anything to him, but he was never the kind of person to actually be worried about a threat on another person's life. It was as if Chrollo suddenly had a hostage that Hisoka truly cared about. This had never happened before.

"Let me take your laundry." Hisoka grabbed Illumi's laundry basket, still in a daze. Illumi watched him with a concerned expression. Hisoka said nothing as he left the room.

…...

Chrollo was learning quickly how to be the ideal butler. With Amane back from her brief imprisonment, Tsubone resumed her work and began teaching Chrollo the basics of being one of the Zoldyck family butlers. At least for now, while Chrollo learned the importance of proper uniform upkeep, Hisoka didn't have to worry about Chrollo getting anywhere near Prytania. He decided that he would take Illumi's bizarre clothes to be laundered himself while deep in thought. He had pulled one of Illumi's crop tops out of the basket when he realized his position of power over Chrollo. He had been charged with his oversight after his initial training. All he had to do was keep him busy enough with chores. Hisoka smiled.

…...

Just as Hisoka had planned, as soon as Chrollo completed his training Hisoka put him to work. Every day, from dawn till curfew, Hisoka had Chrollo working hard. Even if there was a chore that another servant could do, Hisoka made Chrollo do it.

Gotoh and Tsubone had noticed this, but didn't mind one bit. They didn't like Chrollo at all, in fact, nobody seemed to like him. After three weeks, even the other servants in the house began to give him work to do. Chrollo would come back to the room pissed off at Hisoka, but all he did was glare at him each night.

Having grown tired of this, Hisoka sighed and glared back, saying, "If you keep looking at me like that you'll give me a boner."

Chrollo stopped his nightly stare-down with Hisoka after that. It didn't stop Hisoka from lying awake at night with his skin crawling and blood boiling. Chrollo was always there. Right across the room, sleeping soundly. Hisoka wanted to fight him more than anything. It was getting to be too much. He needed to kill someone. Anyone. At times he'd find himself staring over Prytania's sleeping body with a full intent to murder her as she slept, only for Illumi to calm him down.

The constant denial of satisfaction was driving Hisoka up the walls, but he tried not to show it.

It did ease Hisoka's mind that Kalluto left with the Phantom Troupe. Kalluto didn't have time to investigate Hisoka any further himself and left everything to Milluki - who Illumi "took care of," although Hisoka was not sure just how yet. But he worried it was only a temporary fix. If Kalluto came back and asked Milluki about it, he'd probably know something was up and suspect him further. He wondered if Kalluto was keeping communications with the family regarding this.

But Hisoka's main problem at hand was figuring out what Chrollo was up to while keeping Illumi safe.

Whenever Hisoka thought about Illumi, though, he knew Prytania was with him, trying to fulfill the contract that Illumi's family imposed on them. Hisoka hated every bit of it, and his general annoyance towards Prytania grew into hungry murderous intent.

He hadn't killed anyone in so long, and Chrollo was right there, day in and day out. Like a taunting siren, he'd diligently do his chores without much resistance. Chrollo was up to something, Hisoka could feel it. He didn't know yet what it was, but he was wary. He piled on Chrollo's chores as if it could give him any relief, but tormenting anyone was only ever fun if the victim showed their pain, and Chrollo knew better than to give Hisoka what he wanted.

…...

"Come on!" Illumi pushed Prytania off of him despite her protests. It had been three and a half weeks since the wedding and Illumi still wouldn't touch her. His excuse every night was that she was still recovering from being poisoned.

"Nope. You're still not better. You're feverish." Illumi crossed his arms.

"I am not!" Prytania's face was red as she spoke.

"Yes, you are, look at you. Your face is red." Illumi dodged Prytania as she jumped at him from the bed.

"It is not!" Prytania landed gracefully and quickly pounced towards him again.

"Is too." Illumi dodged her again with ease.

"I was better after a few days, Illumi! This has gone on long enough!" Prytania managed to jump up and wrap her arms around Illumi's neck, stopping him from running away.

"Get off me!"

"Either you decide to do this on your own or I get Hisoka involved!"

"Oh, and what is he going do to make me change my mind?"

"I don't fucking know but I'll get him involved!"

Illumi wiggled away from her, letting her land back on the ground from where she'd been hanging on to him.

Prytania huffed. "You know, the longer I'm not pregnant the longer you'll have to wait to leave!"

"Shut up, I know that."

"Then come on!"

"No."

Prytania was beyond frustrated. She grabbed the first thing her hand reached for- the lamp on the nightstand – and chucked it at Illumi. He dodged it easily, and as expected it crashed against the wall behind him.

"That's _it!_ " Illumi walked over to Prytania and picked her up with her arms pinned to her side.

"Put me down!" Prytania wiggled. Illumi opened the door and pushed her out of the room. She stumbled forward and turned around as soon as she got her footing, ready to scream obscenities at her good-for-nothing contract husband. But just as she was face to face with him again, the door slammed shut. Just as her hand reached for the doorknob, she heard the lock click into place.

"God-fucking-dammit, Illumi! Let me in!" Prytania slammed her palm into the wood of the door. She could feel a familiar presence behind her and she sighed.

"Trouble in paradise?" The voice was Hisoka's, and it was as annoying as ever.

Prytania rolled her eyes as she turned around. "Shut it, clown!"

Hisoka stood in the hallway with his smug face holding a basket of laundry. He exhaled a short breath trying to calm himself. He wondered if Prytania could sense his bloodthirst.

Attempting to keep his mind off homicide, he decided to talk to her. "I think you may have come on a little too strong."

"I shouldn't have to be subtle! He _knows_ what I'm here for!"

"Yeah, and how's that workin' for you?"

"Shut up. If I knew he was going to be this childish I would have just asked him to jizz in a cup."

Hisoka frowned. "He doesn't want to be with you. Can you blame him? I mean, look at you." Hisoka couldn't stop his words coming out of his mouth.

Prytania looked at Hisoka for a moment, slightly shocked, but after looking at his face for just a moment, she sighed. "Shut up. I'm not the problem here and you know it."

Hisoka's eyebrow twitched. "Then maybe don't act so eager?"

Prytania rolled her eyes. "Might I remind you that completing my end of the contract is literally life or death for me? And Illumi wouldn't have to be dealing with me at all if it wasn't for his parents so don't you try and turn against me."

Hisoka shifted. "Doesn't make it any less gross."

Prytania turned away from Hisoka to face the door again, ignoring his last remark. She exhaled and held her hands on her hips, looking the frame up and down as if somehow it would just open if she willed it hard enough. Hiskoa was amused for a moment seeing her red face huff at the closed door and the metaphorical wall between her and Illumi. He smiled thinking about how little Illumi had changed.

"Move," Hisoka said to the small angry woman as he walked over to the door and knocked on it. "Illumi. It's me."

There was a short pause before Prytania heard the click of the lock turning, followed by the door opening ever so slightly. Hisoka could see one of Illumi's big, round eyes peeking through the small crack between the door and the frame.

Illumi whispered to Hisoka, "Is _you-know-who_ still there?"

Prytania pushed the door into Illumi and barged back in.

Illumi sighed, exasperated, as Prytania made her way into the room.

"I'm telling you I'm fine!"

"I don't care!" Illumi yelled. "I said no, I'm not ready."

" _Ready?_ You're not _ready?_ It's been nearly a month!" Prytania waved her hands as she spoke. Illumi looked on unimpressed.

Hisoka watched them argue with an amused expression. He couldn't help but think Illumi was adorable when he was annoyed.

Prytania huffed. "You know what? Fine. Take your time. I guess you must love living here in this god-awful mansion with your twisted family!"

Illumi shot her a dirty look. "Don't you dare speak ill of the very family you work for, woman!"

Prytania grit her teeth. The air in the room felt heavy. Hisoka and Illumi both glared at Prytania as she stood with her hands balled into fists.

After what seemed like years, Prytania unclenched and sighed. "Forgive me. I was wrong. Your family is the reason I even get a chance at life."

Illumi crossed his arms. "Look, give me some time alone with Hisoka and then we'll talk about it."

Prytania nodded slowly before grabbing a jacket from the closet and making her way out of the room.

Hisoka set the basket on the bed and began putting clothes away. Illumi sat on the bed next to where Hisoka was working and gave Hisoka a pouty face. Hisoka pretended to ignore it and took a stack of clothes to the closet to hang.

Illumi sighed loudly before Hisoka decided to say anything.

"You still haven't gone for it?" Hisoka spoke from the closet.

"I don't wanna talk about it."

"What? You know you have to fu-"

"I'm worried that... You might actually murder her."

Hisoka sighed. "That is... a possibility."

"More like an inevitability." Illumi mumbled.

Hisoka breathed. "It's just hard with Chrollo being around. I can't..." Hisoka felt himself shaking. He gripped the doorframe of the closet. He could hear Illumi get up from the bed and walk over. He looked up at his lover with weary eyes.

"She doesn't change anything."

"Why can't you try to convince the doctor to do-?"

"The family doctor, Dr. Ito, reports to my mother and father. She'd tell them."

"Then what if you just, you know, get a cup and-"

"That's so gross."

"It's less gross than letting you have sex with that woman!" Hisoka raised his voice. "I'm just. I'm not okay with this. At all. I thought I could be, but I'm not. I'm not okay with spending every night next to Chrollo while she's here in your room trying to get you to-"

"Wait," Illumi frowned. "Chrollo stays in your room?"

"Yes. I thought you knew that."

"You two were at each other's throats when we lived in your apartment and you at least had your own separate rooms. How the hell are you managing?"

"It's not that bad. We scrape by."

"Hisoka!" Illumi whined.

"Look, I don't trust Chrollo for a second. We still don't know what he's doing here and it's easier to keep an eye on him this way."

Illumi walked back over to the bed to sit down. He held his head in his hands and sighed.

Hisoka sighed too, looking at Illumi fondly. "I wish I could take you away from here. Right now."

Illumi looked up at Hisoka from where he sat at the edge of the bed. "Don't get my hopes up. You know we can't leave yet. My family would never stop trying to get me back."

"I know... I just hate that you're so miserable." Hisoka sat down next to Illumi and wrapped his arm around Illumi's waist.

"We don't even get to talk that much nowadays." Illumi whined.

"Yeah, I know. I miss you." Hisoka rested his head on Illumi.

Illumi looked at Hisoka. A thought crossed his mind and he grinned.

"What is it?" Hisoka couldn't help but smile with Illumi, even if he didn't know yet what he was grinning about.

"You know what I miss?"

"What?"

"I miss waking up with you."

Hisoka remembered waking up with Illumi. He remembered the morning before Hisoka left for Greed Island, and he remembered being embarrassed because of his bedhead.

"Yeah? I thought you hated that."

Illumi ran his hand up Hisoka's back. "No, I miss it. I even miss your snoring."

Hisoka laughed. "Not everyone can sleep like the dead like you can."

"False. I sleep stealthily, as an assassin should."

"An assassin should this- an assassin should that. You really haven't changed much since you moved in with me."

"I think I've changed a lot."

"You sure have." Hisoka looked at his boyfriend's face. It was true, he had changed. Illumi no longer pretended to be nothing more than a cold machine. He was softer, easier to read. At least, when it was just the two of them.

"Yeah, you have. You let your emotions show more often."

"Hopefully, only to you. I'd hate to show any weakness in front of my family."

"Yeah, well your family is... different."

"Assassins are... my family trained us to be very cold and unfeeling. They have their set of rules and their principles. You don't ever show emotion."

Hisoka pondered for a moment, putting a hand on his chin before looking and smiling at Illumi. "You know, they might have told you that to protect you from getting attached to people, but they show emotion too. They are people, after all."

"What? Them? People? Hardly."

"Your family- Your dad and your grandfather. Especially your mother. They all express what they're feeling in one way or another."

Illumi thought about how over the top his mother was all the time.

"She hasn't always been like that."

"Oh?"

"She used to be as cold unfeeling as they come. Don't get me wrong, she can still kill without even blinking, but she used to be more stoic. I noticed that she was excited when she had Killua. He was always her favorite."

Hisoka eyed Illumi's profile as he spoke. It was the first time he'd heard him really talk about anything regarding his childhood.

Illumi continued. "I think it wasn't until Killua started acting up. All his talk of friends and life outside these walls really put her mind somewhere else. She's always been so in control of everything that we did. When he left, I think she felt like she was losing control of everything, even if she was still proud of him for doing what he wanted. She started having these tantrums. It's been that way ever since. If anything doesn't go as planned she loses it."

Hisoka nodded. "You know, I think it runs in the family to be a little possessive."

"Yeah, you could say that." Illumi half smiled.

Hisoka watched Illumi's expression carefully, sensing pain in it somehow.

"My father's range of visible emotions tend to be anywhere from slight discomfort to contempt. He gets angry, but he doesn't let it control him. He's always been able to keep a level-head."

"He's a good leader."

"Yeah. That's why I'll never be the heir."

"Hmm?"

"My father chose Killua to be the heir over me or Milluki because of the flaws in our ability to stay focused."

"What about Kalluto?"

"It's the same with Kalluto. My father thinks none of us value human life enough. Kalluto may have been too young when my parents chose Killua, but Kalluto has proven to be just as bad as Milluki and me."

"That's probably true."

"Yeah, but it still hurts when your own father knows you're insane and can't be trusted."

Hisoka sighed. "If it helps, all the best people are crazy."

Illumi laughed "That means jack shit coming from you. You're just as bad as me if not worse."

"Hey, now."

Illumi stared at Hisoka. He loved that Hisoka's presence was comforting somehow. It wasn't just heated tension, although there was much of that. But Illumi truly felt at ease.

"What was your family like?" Illumi watched Hisoka's expression flinch, as if he'd hit a nerve.

"They- uh. Well I..." Hisoka stumbled on his words nervously. He calmed himself, remembering that it was Illumi he was talking to. If anyone would understand, it would be him. "My family wasn't really a solid unit. I was born in Meteor City. Everyone was out for themselves, so they didn't care about me. Understandably so, I mean who has time to feed a brat? My father was really strong. He would fight and win money for himself. My mother was the only person strong enough to fight him and win so we could get enough to get by. They never killed each other, which I thought was odd. They killed everyone else, just not each other."

"Do you think they loved each other?" Illumi posed his question carefully.

"I... I don't know. Maybe. They knew that they were pretty evenly matched. It was always a thrilling fight to see. It was like watching two Lions go at it. And they knew each other well. They each knew the other person's fighting style so well that it was almost a draw every time, but they always ended the fight before they killed each other."

"What happened to them?"

"They were killed."

"Who killed them?"

Hisoka frowned. "You'll laugh."

Illumi's mouth stretched in a slight smile. "I won't, tell me."

"I killed them."

"That's not surprising in the least."

"I just got tired of their endless fighting and no resolution. I wanted to see who would win if they actually tried."

"But now you'll never know for sure."

"Quite the opposite. I know for sure they would have both died. They were strong, sure, but they couldn't even kill their own offspring. They let their emotions get the better of them both and didn't finish the fight. They let themselves be killed. They were equals to the end."

Illumi frowned. "And what about us?"

"What about us?"

"Do you think we let our emotions get in the way of killing each other?"

Hisoka scoffed. "We are far more rational than my parents ever were."

"What makes you say that?"

"Because we're actually together and we know how we feel. We already know we don't want to kill each other because we'd rather be in love. My parents were clueless fools stumbling at the edge of their emotions, trying desperately not to give in to them when they should have given in to them at full force, not half-heartedly like they did."

Illumi kissed Hisoka gently. Hisoka's face flushed pink.

"Maybe emotions aren't so bad." Illumi said, his face a beautiful hue of red.

…...

Chrollo scrubbed the cold white marble floor in a ballroom. He hated the castle. He hated the mixture of traditional Padokean themes and furniture mixed with the castle architecture. As he scrubbed, he wondered if this would all be worth it. He heard small footsteps approach him. He sat up straight and rested on his knees. Amane stood before him with her hands at her sides.

"Amane, angel!" Chrollo smiled sweetly. "Where you able to find anything?"

"N-no..." Amane looked over her shoulder carefully.

"That's okay, sweetie. You are trying, right?"

"Yes, I am... It's just..."

"What is it?"

"After what happened... I don't want to do this anymore. What if I get caught? Then they'll really-"

"Amane." Chrollo stopped Amane's rambling with a strong voice. "You agreed to this. The Zoldycks need to pay for what they put you through. You thought they were really going to kill you."

Amane could feel tears swelling up at the thought of it.

"No, shush, don't cry." Amane let out a soft sob, and Chrollo quickly dried his hands and wiped her tears. "Remember what they made your grandmother go through. No person should have to beg for the life of their grandchild. The Zoldycks need to pay. Help me with this, and I'll bring them all down."

"B-But if I get caught-"

"Do you think I wouldn't protect you? Do you think I'd sell you out the same way Illumi's new wife did?"

"N-no..."

"Then what are you afraid of?"

"Alluka... If her power gets out, a lot of people will die."

"Of course, that's why I'm trying to save her. I'll take her away from all this so she can be somewhere where she'll be happy and she won't hurt anyone. I'll take her away and I'll get you and your grandma out and together we'll expose everyone in this castle for who they really are." Chrollo held Amane's tiny face in his hands. "We'll show everyone that they're monsters. Monsters who kept their own child in a cage for most of her life and almost killed a little girl for speaking about it."

Amane nodded and Chrollo hugged her. She wrapped her small arms around him and took a comforting deep breath. Once she was calm, he released the embrace.

"No more tears. There are only good things to come from here on out."

...

...

Hisoka had Illumi bent over the counter which led to his tub. It had been a whole week since they'd actually gotten the chance to fuck, and Prytania still wasn't back yet. It didn't take them long to start groping each other behind the locked door of Illumi's bedroom, as if they'd never touched each other before. They were in the tub, and the steamy hot water made Illumi's skin blush a soft pink all over. Hisoka savored every inch of Illumi's skin.

Illumi knew how to arch his back so perfectly for Hisoka to see his pretty ass. Hisoka gripped his lover's butt, he missed it so much he almost didn't believe it was real. His other hand was two fingers deep into Illumi, stretching him and preparing him with a slick lubricant. He wanted to be inside Illumi already, but he couldn't resist savoring each moment.

He pulled his fingers out slowly and Illumi moaned. Illumi gasped as he felt Hisoka's warm, moist tongue against him. His finger clenching into fists, he wished he had something to cling onto. Hisoka's tongue swirled, and Illumi's mind floated somewhere else, a higher tier of existence. He felt Hisoka move away, and Illumi remembered how to breathe.

"Fuck-" Hisoka groaned out, his dick was hard and dripping against Illumi's hole, ready to enter. Illumi whimpered and pushed back against Hisoka, hoping somehow, he could will himself onto Hisoka. Illumi's own erection was untouched thus far, and he found himself gently thrusting into the water, unconsciously searching for some kind of friction. Hisoka noticed and grinned. He smacked Illumi's ass.

"After only one week of no dick and you're already like this? What a slut." Hisoka teased Illumi by rubbing his tip on him, making him shiver.

"Shut up! Just fuck me already." Illumi spoke in between harsh breaths, and his desperation stroked Hisoka's ego in all the right ways. Hisoka grabbed a fist full of Illumi's long, thick hair and pulled his head back just enough so Hisoka could come in close and whisper into his ear.

"Let me hear you beg for it."

Illumi scratched his nails along the marble, frustrated beyond logic and looking for anything to grab onto. "Fuck me."

"What's the magic word?"

Illumi inhaled and closed his eyes. "…. Please." Illumi mumbled out.

"What's that?"

"Fuck me, please!" Illumi spoke louder this time. Hisoka grinned and pushed his tip into Illumi. He groaned and bit his lip watching his dick stretch him open. Illumi's mouth hung open and he moaned out loud.

"M-more …" Illumi gasped out his words, trying to remember to breathe.

"Not yet." Hisoka stroked his lover's back, soothing him. When Illumi's breaths were calmer, Hisoka pushed further in.

"God-fucking-dammit fuck me please!" Illumi whined. Hisoka couldn't help but notice the way Illumi cursed was now more similar to how Prytania cursed. Every word had echoed against the bathroom walls, and in his gut he hated her all the more.

Without warning, Hisoka pushed himself into Illumi. He gasped.

"Breathe." Hisoka moaned, and Illumi looked back at him with half-lidded eyes. Hisoka met Illumi's stare, still in awe at the things this man could do to him. Illumi swiveled his hips and moaned, leaving Hisoka in a daze. Hisoka finally got a grip and began to pull out of Illumi and thrust back in, Illumi meeting every thrust with a moan. Hisoka grabbed onto Illumi's hips, steadying them as he picked up the pace.

It felt so good. Too good. Hisoka's mind already felt fuzzy, He fucked Illumi thoroughly and hard, biting his lip and digging his fingernails into Illumi's sides. He liked the pretty red marks he left on Illumi's skin. He loved the way Illumi's back looked under him. He petted his lover's lovely skin with a slow stroke of his fingertips, and Illumi arched into the touch like a cat. Hisoka leaned forward and reached around at Illumi's dick, lightly stroking it. Illumi shuddered, it was all so much.

Hisoka placed his palms on either side of Illumi and leaned forward. "You feel so good," he whispered. Illumi whimpered, it was the only response he was capable of at this point. It warmed him to know that he brought Hisoka pleasure.

Illumi knew when Hisoka was close. His rapid pace losing control of any kind of pattern, and hit grunts gave it away. Hisoka pulled out, stroking himself so that he came on top of Illumi. Illumi felt the warm liquid on his back and in his hair. He felt Hisoka's hands scooping him up as he guided him to sit up. The cold touch of the marble against his back made Illumi shiver. Hisoka kissed him long and just right. Not too hard, not too soft. Illumi watched the golden eyes looking up at him as Hisoka got down on his knees to suck him off. Illumi exhaled slowly, letting his head lazily rock back as he felt Hisoka's warm mouth around him.

"Fuck..." Illumi moaned out. Hisoka moaned, and the throaty vibrations felt wild to Illumi. He'd been missing this, Hisoka's tongue dancing across Illumi's tip and the skill at which he bobbed his head. Illumi found both his hands fisted up in Hisoka's dyed hair.

"Hiso- Hisoka!" Illumi gasped out. Hisoka moved quicker, and the sounds of his obscene work drove Illumi closer to the edge.

"Ahh... Ah!" Illumi came, blushing red at the sounds he just made. Hisoka's brows furrowed, taking Illumi's load as much as he could and drinking it in, but he loved Illumi's expression. Illumi's mouth gaped open, staring at the cum dripping at Hisoka's lips, everything he couldn't swallow overflowing into the water.

"Fuck you're beautiful." Illumi whispered.

"What?"

"I said fuck you."

"You want to go again?"

"...Give me a few minutes."

…...

Illumi and Hisoka had cleaned themselves up, and Illumi began to get redressed. Hisoka was taking a shower in his bathroom.

There was a knock on the door, followed by a little voice. "Illumi? It's me, Prytania."

Illumi slipped on his robe. He was already wearing pants, but he hated to be any kind of naked around Prytania for fear that she'd pounce. He walked over to the door and opened it, letting Prytania in.

"Is Hisoka here?"

"He's in the shower."

"Oh. Okay."

Prytania and Illumi stood in silence for a few agonizing seconds.

"Hey, Prytania, I'm sorry about all this. I know you hate it. I hate it, too."

"Y-yeah. And I'm sorry for being too much."

Illumi nodded. Hisoka stepped out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his waist.

"Oh, it's our very own Pretty Princess Prytania!" Hisoka smiled his fox-faced smile.

Illumi frowned, and Prytania looked away from Hisoka. "Sorry I didn't know I was interrupting anything."

Hisoka chuckled. "I don't think Illumi would have let you in if we were in the middle of-"

Illumi cleared his throat. Hisoka nodded. "….an activity."

Illumi's eyes seemed to nearly fall out his skull from rolling them so hard. Hisoka scoffed "It's not like she doesn't know what we do."

Prytania coughed. "I'm just gonna... Use the restroom." Prytania walked into the restroom and shut the door behind her.

"Is fucking all they ever do?" She mumbled to herself. She looked into the mirror. Her father would call her every so often, asking if she'd had success completing her task. Every time she told him no, he'd yell at her saying other girls could seal the deal after the first night. She had avoided the entire topic of Chrollo to her father and her episode of being poisoned on her wedding night, which would have been a pretty solid reason for not doing it then, but she kept that detail to herself. He told her to call him once she was pregnant or had found some useful information for him. She sighed.

She could see in the mirror that the tub filled with water behind her. She peared over it curiously. By the looks of things, her contract husband and his gay serial killer butler lover clown had done it in the tub and forgot to drain it.

"Gross it probably has-" Prytania stopped herself mid-thought. What if Illumi came in the tub? Prytania was suddenly faced with a question of her own sanity.

"Am I insane? Am I really about to harvest this man's baby gravy from a bathtub? Would it even work? How would I even..." Prytania's mind raced.

Illumi knocked on the bathroom door. "Prytania? Did you fall in?"

After a moment of silence, Prytania opened the door. "Sorry. I just drained your bath. It was still full." Illumi peeked behind Prytania and could hear the sound of the tub draining.

Illumi coughed. "Oh, uh- did you put your hand in the tub?"

Prytania cleared her throat. "Yes. How else am I supposed to drain it?"

Illumi looked at Prytania in disbelief. "Nothing. Nothing's wrong with- with putting your hand... In the bathwater." Illumi's expression confirmed to Prytania what exactly was in the bathwater.

Illumi stepped away from the door to let Prytania back into the main part of Illumi's bedroom.

"So, what are you two doing today?"

Illumi answered, "We were just about to go to the family's information room. I wanted to check on current jobs."

"Jobs?" Prytania asked.

"Assassinations. We get incoming files and decide which ones to take." Illumi answered with a calm expression.

"Oh. You haven't taken any since I arrived so I assumed you wouldn't at all."

"Well it's the one thing I can do to get off this mountain. But I have to take Hisoka with me as Hiro and then he reports back to my mother."

"She thinks Hiro is her spy for you?"

"That's why I'm allowed so close." Hisoka smiled. Illumi almost laughed at the irony.

"Well, alright. I'll be here then."

Illumi nodded. He had finished getting dressed into a frilly purple long sleeve and dark green pants. Hisoka was wearing his butler's uniform as usual. She was glad that at least one of them didn't look ridiculous, although not by choice.

The pair left the room. As soon as enough time had passed that she knew they'd have cleared the corridor that led to Illumi's room, Prytania crept out and headed for the infirmary.

…...

Hisoka and Illumi walked down the halls of the mansion in upmost discretion. Illumi would always walk ahead of Hisoka, and Hisoka, posing as Hiro, would walk behind him at a respectful distance. It was the case most of the time that while they were outside Illumi's room, they behaved as only Butler and Master. Nothing more, nothing less.

Hiro wasn't allowed into the family's information room, where Illumi chose several jobs to keep him occupied for at least a week. He was hesitant about taking a longer assignment, due to his concern regarding Chrollo's activity. As soon as he had his files he and Hisoka went back to his room.

"Prytania's not here." Hisoka commented.

"She's probably on a walk somewhere." Illumi packed a small suitcase for himself. "You should head back to your room and grab the things you need. We'll leave tonight."

"Tonight?"

"No offense to Prytania, but I don't want to spend another night in bed with her."

"That's fair, but why the sudden trip? With Chrollo here and all-"

"Chrollo is exactly why I want to get us out of here. At least for a week."

"Why?"

"I can't have you killing Prytania or one of the butlers."

"I wouldn't-"

"You would. So, we're going away, and you're going to help me kill some people."

"Some?"

"A lot of people."

"...Are they strong?"

"Mostly sleazy politicians and mob bosses."

Hisoka pouted. Illumi shut his suitcase. "There will be strong people too."

"Oh?"

"One of the mob bosses is heavily guarded at all times. He's surrounded by twelve guards at all times, and they're all Nen users."

"You could take care of them yourself if you wanted to, right?"

"This job actually requires two people. If his guards are under attack then the target will have time to escape. I can't let that happen or we won't be getting paid."

"Can I kill them?"

"Of course. Can't have any witnesses."

Hisoka's mouth curled into a sickly grin. Illumi shooed him away to his dorm so he could go pack.

It was still early, Chrollo hadn't come back yet. Hisoka gathered his set of clothes he had brought with him when he applied to work here, a second uniform, his toiletries, undergarments, and his spare deck of cards. Before stepping out the door, he took a look at himself in the mirror. His black hair really made him look like something else. He didn't look at all like himself. The butler's uniform didn't help. He glanced over at the suitcase, and then to Chrollo's bed. He was going to need to talk to Gotoh.

.…...

The mountain air was cold, even if it was still the summer. Hisoka wondered how cold this place got during the winter, since it was a mountain and all.

Illumi met him at the beginning of the path that led down the mountain.

"I spoke with Gotoh about Chrollo."

"What did you say?"

"I told him to keep a close watch on him."

"That goes without saying."

"Still doesn't hurt to say."

Illumi shrugged. They made their way down the mountain, passing Canary on the way. She bowed respectfully as they passed and paid her no mind.

Leaving the mountain behind and stepping out of the gate felt more freeing than Hisoka believed it could be. The air felt different in his lungs. There was no one to report to, no one to look out for. He breathed in the light air and sighed.

"Is this how it feels every time you leave the mountain?"

"Every single time."

"Why do you ever bother going back?"

Illumi walked forward, not answering Hisoka's question. "We have work to do."

...

Chapter 18, Fin.

Author's Note:

I haven't been dead, I've just been reworking this chapter for way too long lol.

Let me know what you think!

I appreciate you all reading! I know that it's been a while.

EDIT: I changed a few minor things because I suck and forgot to edit hence the update.

****Bonus for your troubles:

Hisoka and Illumi approached Illumi's car. They walked in silence towards it, still not far enough away from the mountain to be completely comfortable. Illumi opened the trunk with his car remote and held his suitcase out for Hisoka to take.

"I'm not your butler out here, you know."

"Just take it to the trunk."

Hisoka reached his hand out to take the bag, but as soon as Illumi let go of the weight, Hisoka realized he vastly underestimated the heaviness of it. He nearly dropped it, but was able to readjust to the weight difference.

"Sheesh, Illumi what the hell did you pack?"

"Just the essentials."

"Such as?"

"You'll find out."

Bonus, Fin~


	19. The Wages of Sin

Hisoka and Illumi boarded their airship before other passengers. They had decided that at least while they were still in Padokea, Hisoka should continue to move around under the name Hiro and appear as Illumi's butler. It would be cause for suspicion if anyone looked into the boarding records and saw Hisoka's actual name boarding with Illumi. Even if the airship line promised confidentiality, they both knew it didn't take someone of Milluki's caliber to access those records.

Nonetheless, Hisoka could feel himself relax more the further they got away. The aircraft was headed to the other side of the Padokean continent, near heaven's arena. It was their first stop on this trip. From there they would head to Yorkshin. Illumi carefully planned their Itinerary so they could move as discreetly as possible.

The pair sat in a lounge area across from one another. Illumi read over the files of the job in his phone while Hisoka watched calmly. Illumi sat upright, legs crossed and his free arm resting on his lap. Hisoka also sat with one leg crossed over the other, although his stance was much wider than Illumi's.

"This is nice," Hisoka sighed.

Illumi's eyebrow raised at the magician sitting across from him. Hisoka watched him glance around the airship's lounge. The accommodations were adequate at best for two first class tickets. The couches and coffee tables were outdated, although he'd admit they weren't worn. The bar area was quiet today and from what he could tell, their selection of alcohol was your average run-of-the-mill bar selection. A large digital clock hung above the entryway to the area, and Illumi couldn't help but note that it clashed with the décor.

"If this is what you think luxury looks like you are sorely mistaken." Illumi finally spoke after surveying everything.

Hisoka chuckled. "I wasn't talking about the airship. I meant this. Us. I like sitting with you."

Hisoka noticed a brief blush on Illumi's cheeks, which he soon regained control over. "Aren't you bored?" Illumi glued his eyes back to his phone as he spoke.

"Yes, but I'm excited for the things to come. And watching you concentrate so much is... what's a good word for it?" Hisoka's eyes looked up, seemingly searching the air for the word he needed. "Delicious."

Illumi lifted his gaze and squinted at Hisoka. "Delicious?" Illumi repeated.

"Yes."

"Absurd." Illumi shook his head as he looked back down at the job files. Hisoka smiled. He could almost visibly read Illumi's thoughts now. He knew it would probably make Illumi uncomfortable to continue to compliment him. It was one thing to compliment him in the confines of his room where he was safe from peering eyes, but here, they were in public. People could see him. He was on guard.

Perfect.

"Your face looks so serious, Illumi. It's kind of hot."

Illumi's eyes darted up at Hisoka, who sat there with a smug smile. Illumi stared at the magician, saying nothing.

Hisoka continued, "I can tell you're as ready for bloodshed as I am, the way you look over your targets. Let me ask you, do you always deal with them quickly? Or do you ever savor the kill?"

Illumi sighed and looked around the vicinity before glaring at Hisoka. "There's a gym on this airship somewhere. Maybe if you're feeling antsy you should work off some of that energy there."

"Or we could step into an empty corridor and figure out a way to burn off some energy there."

"We have a perfectly good room on this airship. If you're that pent up I'll entertain you later." Illumi glanced back down at his phone, scrolling further.

"But it's more fun if there's a chance we'll get caught."

Illumi squinted at Hisoka, studying him. "What are you trying to do?"

"What does it look like I'm doing?"

"It looks like you're trying to seduce me in public."

"Then that's what I'm doing."

"No, I know you. You're up to something."

"Oh? And what exactly do you think I'm up to? What can your assassin's eyes tell you? "Hisoka smiled, placing his hand under his chin and leaning forward.

Illumi surveyed Hisoka's posture, looking for tells. Hisoka's smile was the familiar display of weaponry that Illumi knew too well. The way the muscles on his face would crease his skin, Illumi could tell that Hisoka was anticipating amusement. Whatever Hisoka was trying to do, it was for his own entertainment. After a short silence, Illumi said quietly, "I don't know yet."

Hisoka's grin softened, Illumi knew his answer surprised him.

"Come on, Illumi, you're smarter than that. Tell me what you think I'm doing."

"I'm not going to play your little game, Hisoka I have work to do."

"This airship won't land until this evening. You have plenty of time. _We_ have plenty of time."

The hungry look in Hisoka's eyes was something Illumi hadn't seen in a while. And although he wouldn't mind having a little fun, he didn't like it when he felt like Hisoka was going to make fun of him.

"You're right. We have plenty of time on this airship."

"So, you want to make use of that time?" Hisoka perked up.

"Of course. We'll make excellent use of our time. You go to the room, I'll stay here reading through the job files, and you get rid of that black hair."

Hisoka blinked. "What?"

"Dye your hair back. I like it red." Illumi scrolled through his screen as he spoke.

"This entire trip is only a little over a week long I'm not bleaching my hair again just to dye it back when we have to return to the mansion." Hisoka's face was amusingly less excited than before. In fact, it was visibly annoyed. His brows were furrowed and his lips curled into a near frown. Illumi kept his face still, but he was decidedly amused.

"I don't care. I liked your hair better when it was red and worn up."

"Do you want my hair to fall out?" Hisoka's pitch raised as he spoke. "It's bad enough that I dyed my hair black because that shit's never coming out."

Hisoka's exasperation grew, he just needed a push in the right direction and Illumi knew he'd leave him alone.

"Your roots are showing." The final nail in the coffin.

"What? Are you serious?" Hisoka's hands made his way to the top of his head by instinct. "You're kidding, right?"

"Nope. I can see them plain as day. The red makes me miss your natural hair."

Hisoka grunted, displeased. Illumi looked back down at his phone. "I'll be here." Illumi spoke dismissively.

Hisoka stood up, defeated, but not deterred. Illumi knew he'd be back, but only after he dealt with his hair. Illumi knew by now that Hisoka's attention to every detail about himself was important to him. He always wanted to appear flawless. Even in his butler's uniform, he would make sure it was always pristine. Pointing out a flaw was the easiest way to get him to be elsewhere. As Hisoka walked away, Illumi smiled knowing he knew one of Hisoka's many weaknesses and successfully used it against him.

…...

Prytania wandered the halls of the Zoldyck mansion. It was impeccably clean, and vast. The majority of the rooms and halls were often dimly lit, with not much sunlight. The outer rooms did allow for beautiful sunlight to peak in through stained glass. Her favorite room was a tea room overlooking the gardens. She could easily see herself wasting hours there, but she was on a mission. She needed to take the time now that Illumi and Hisoka were both gone to find out what happened to the missing Zoldyck child.

"Where are you going, dear?"

Prytania stopped walking. She recognized the voice behind her as her mother-in-law, Kikyo. She mustered up her best smile.

"I was just headed to the north tea room."

"Ah. Well, you're going the wrong way. That hallway leads south."

Prytania hoped Kikyo hadn't sensed her lie. Without missing a beat, she said, "My mistake. It's just such a grand mansion I must have gotten turned around."

"Without Illumi here it must be difficult finding your way."

"Yes, that's precisely it!"

"No worries. I'll show you to the tea room, and we can have tea together!"

Prytania had never really been afraid of another woman before, at least not like this. Everything about Kikyo screamed _manipulator_. After hanging around Illumi for so long, Prytania thought she'd be used to it by now.

"Certainly."

Kikyo stepped in front of Prytania and walked towards the tea room. Prytania followed, walking behind her at a small distance.

"Prytania, you may walk beside me. You're a Zoldyck now, no need to keep your distance as if you were a butler."

"Right." Prytania sped up her pace to walk beside Kikyo. Her mother-in-law was by no means as tall as Illumi, but she was not a short woman. Prytania was barely above five feet tall, and next to Kikyo she felt tiny even with pumps. They walked in near silence, the only sound about them was the sound of Prytania's heels clacking against the smooth floor. As they walked, she noticed that only her shoes were making any kind of noise. Kikyo's steps were more silent than death.

They made it to the tea room and entered. The furniture in this particular tearoom was not traditionally Padokean, like most of the rest of the house. The seats were more Yorkshin style, beautifully fabricated around what appeared to be some kind of red wood.

Prytania made her way to one of the cushioned chairs while Kikyo reached her gloved hand to pull on a white and gold tassel rope which hung near the entrance.

"Tea will be here shortly." Kikyo beamed. She sat down across from Prytania and neatly folded her hands in her lap.

Prytania swallowed.

"So, Daughter-in-law," Kikyo began, "you've been here for almost a month."

"Yes, I have. It's been such an experience."

A hidden door in the wall opened, and Chrollo walked in. He held a tray with a teapot and two teacups. Prytania watched as he set the tray down and poured the seeped tea into their cups.

"Don't worry, Prytania." Kikyo's voice brought Prytania's attention back to the woman across from her. "The other butlers are instructed to watch this one when he prepares tea. Considering his track record of poisoning you, we wouldn't want a repeat of your wedding ceremony."

"Aha." Prytania laughed dryly. She still watched Chrollo carefully. She didn't trust him at all. She had not been present when they Zoldycks decided to keep him alive, but had she been she probably would have called them all crazy for keeping him around.

"Milk and sugar?" Chrollo asked Prytania.

"Yes. Two please."

Prytania watched as he prepared the tea to her liking. He had already fixed Kikyo's tea, and Prytania assumed she took her tea the same every time.

Chrollo sat the teacups and their saucers on the table before them, and bowed before leaving, never looking Kikyo in the eye. The door closed behind him, leaving the wall back as it was, with only the seam of the outline of the door to indicate that it ever moved.

Kikyo picked up her tea cup and softly blew on her tea to cool it. The red dot in the middle of her visor didn't move, but seemed to be kept forward, aiming right at Prytania.

"You're not going to have your tea?" Kikyo asked. Prytania realized she had been staring at Kikyo without picking up her tea cup.

"Ah, I was just letting it cool some." Prytania lifted the cup and mimicked Kikyo, blowing on it to get it to cool. She sipped it, and the hot tea burned her mouth.

"Ouch!" Prytania exclaimed in a small voice. She glanced down at her teacup and saw what looked like a scrap of paper. Her eyebrows furrowed.

"Too hot?" Kikyo asked in a sweet voice.

"Yes, I ought to let it cool some." Prytania picked up the saucer from the low coffee table in front of her and set the teacup down on top of it on the table to her right. She hoped Kikyo hadn't already seen the paper in the cup.

"You know, Prytania. I was surprised that Illumi took a job this week, leaving you behind."

"Oh. I expected that he'd need to eventually work. I wasn't too surprised by it."

Kikyo set her tea down on the table to her left. "My boy had been slacking off recently, and what with having a new wife to entertain, I imagined that he would be slacking off even more. Nonetheless, I'm glad he's back out there."

Prytania shifted her weight. "Do you not like it when he leaves?"

Kikyo smiled. "Call me crazy, but a Mother worries for her children. No matter how old they become."

"Right."

"When it comes to Illumi, I feel much has improved. He understands his role is to the family again. He's my son before anything else, and I think he understands that now."

Prytania nodded.

"Prytania?" Kikyo's tone was questioning, and Prytania's heart raced.

"Yes?"

"Are you pregnant?"

Prytania smiled. "I don't believe so."

Kikyo's mouth was flat, almost a frown. "I had hoped that the reason Illumi left was because he knew he didn't have a duty to perform."

"Well, it's not from lack of trying-"

"Believe me, we know."

"Sorry?"

"The butlers who launder often see poor Hiro washing your bedsheets. I don't blame you, I know you're trying. It just concerns me that after all this time of trying, the work bears no fruit."

Prytania cleared her throat. Illumi hadn't touched her once the whole month except to throw her out of his room. It was beyond uncomfortable for her to know that the same bedsheets she slept on were the bedsheets her gay husband got fucked on.

"I'd like you to visit the family doctor today."

"Certainly."

"Dr. Ito is our trusted physician. She'll take very good care of you."

Prytania nodded and took up her tea. There was no longer any steam coming off it, and she sipped it without burning herself again. A question came to her mind.

"I know it is not my place to ask, but why did you marry Illumi off?"

"Pardon?"

"I mean, if I understand correctly, he isn't the heir. Any of his children will not have claim to the estate, so why push for it?"

Kikyo sighed. "You are right, it is not your place to ask."

"Forgive me, madam." Prytania watched as the red dot on Kikyo's visor focused on her hands. Prytania quickly grabbed the slip of paper that was in her teacup and held it in her hands. Kikyo didn't appear to notice.

"I guess there's no harm in telling you." Kikyo looked back up at Prytania, who leaned in with curiosity.

Kikyo sighed again. "I just want grandchildren, and there's no rule that says Illumi can't get married. In fact, if something were to happen to Killua, although that boy is so strong I highly doubt it, it's always good to have a backup."

"A backup?"

"Yes. Illumi is my first-born son, and the most loyal to the family in my opinion. He would better serve the family as the heir, and although I am bursting with pride for Killua, he is not the son I would have picked to take over the estate."

Prytania sipped her tea. Kikyo continued.

"I don't want to have favorites, but Illumi is the child that made me a mother. He's my pride and joy. My eldest. Not to mention, he's always been the most obedient one."

"Obedient?"

"He's always done what we've asked him to. He takes care of his younger brothers. He does the jobs he is told to do. Sometimes, his intentions don't match our entirely, but his will is closest to mine. I believe he'd make the best Zoldyck heir."

Prytania thought to herself. It made sense that Kikyo would push for Illumi to have children. If he became the heir, he would just do what she says. He's the obedient one, in her eyes. If he became the new head of the family, she could easily control him. She would manipulate her own son so that she would have true control.

"It also wouldn't hurt for Killua's future children to have cousins to look up to. Our family is very small, you see. There's only a handful of us left because of this ridiculous expectation that only the heir should have children. Zeno opposed it at first but agreed that our family is small and more assassins couldn't hurt our budget in the long run."

Prytania squinted for a moment but remembered Kikyo was watching and she relaxed her face quickly. She lifted her tea to her mouth and sipped. It didn't make any sense. Illumi having children would not benefit the estate in any way except for the purpose of Kikyo's benefit. The fact that Zeno and Silva allowed it without much resistance was surprising.

"But enough about me. I'm interested in you."

"Me?"

"Yes. Why are you with this company?"

"I believe in a better, stronger future."

Kikyo scoffed. "Prytania, honey. I come from an agency much like yours. Don't give me that artificial corporate mantra. Why are you with this company? What did you do to land yourself there? You kill someone?"

Prytania was almost shocked at the realness of Kikyo's question, but it was more refreshing than anything. A fellow contract wife, a successful one, was asking about her life. She wanted to trust her. She wanted a friend, but the devil sitting in front of her was not a friend, and Prytania knew better than to tell her whole story.

"Yes."

"Who did you kill?"

"An ex-boyfriend."

"Did he deserve it?"

"Yes."

"Good. Justice was served, then." Kikyo finished her tea and set it down on the coffee table.

"Oh, look at the time. It's been good talking with you, but I must be going. I hope you don't mind that I leave you here."

"It's not problem."

"I'll have a butler escort you to wherever you'd like."

"Oh, I don't mind getting a little lost trying to find my way."

"Nonsense. This estate is huge. I can't have Illumi come home only to find that we've lost his wife." Kikyo chuckled, and Prytania did the same. She wondered if Kikyo knew she was sneaking around trying to find out information and wanted to keep an eye on her.

"Alright. Oh, and don't forget to visit with our physician. In fact, I think you should go as soon as possible. Now, even."

"Yes, ma'am."

"See? I knew you'd be a great pick for Illumi. You're so... obedient." Prytania kept her classic fake smile as Kikyo left the room. She quickly opened the piece of paper that was in her hand. It was laminated, to protect it from the hot tea.

It said, " _ **I know what you did, and I know who you are**_ "

Chills ran down Prytania's spine. She looked up from the paper and nearly screamed. Chrollo was sitting in the seat where Kikyo was just moments ago. She didn't even hear him come in. He sat with his arm resting on the table to his left, and his legs crossed widely.

"Sorry if I startled you, Britannica."

"It's Prytania."

"Whatever. I know what you did."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"You're right, you probably don't know what I'm talking about. I bet you assume I'm trying to blackmail you on the basis of what you did to those poor girls in the lab."

Prytania squinted at him. "Then what exactly are you talking about."

"It's best not to talk about sensitive subjects in this room, you know."

"I don't follow."

"I'm sure you noticed earlier that the lady of the house pulled on that tassel over by the door when you came in."

"Yes, but what does that... wait."

"Ah, now you get it."

"You came in with two tea cups."

"You _do_ have a brain! Congratulations."

"There's a peephole somewhere in here for the servants to check how many people need tea."

"Yep! And guess which trio of idiots I saw talking in here the other day."

Prytania exhaled. "You overheard Illumi, Hisoka, and I talking."

"You fucked the clown."

Prytania wrinkled her nose in disgust, faced with the truth that she had, indeed, fucked the clown.

"He's a magician."

"You know, I never imagined that Illumi would end up being contractually married to someone exactly like him. A clown fucker."

"What do you want?" Prytania raised her voice.

"Feisty, feisty! I've never heard you speak to anyone like that. Your voice all raised and demanding... Did you talk to Hisoka like that when you let him put his-?"

"Shut up!" Prytania yelled and stood up, anger seeping through her pores. "Tell me what you want already!"

Chrollo leaned forward, keeping his eyes locked with Prytania's. "I don't want anything from you, Prytania. I want to help you."

"Help me? By blackmailing me?"

"The blackmailing is, unfortunately, necessary. I hate to do it but I need to have some kind of leverage."

"You're not making sense."

"The child's name is Alluka, and she has unbelievable powers."

"I already figured that much."

"But you haven't been able to search for her."

"Kikyo wants me to move around with an escort."

"Because she doesn't trust you."

"She doesn't trust you either."

"Right. But she trusts the other butlers."

"So? The other butlers don't trust you either."

"That's not the case with everyone. Some of them think I'm a good person."

"You must be very charismatic."

"When I want to be."

"So, the other butlers trust you. What are you saying?"

"I'm saying I know where she is, and I know you want that information."

"You found her?"

"Not I, I can't even go near that part of the estate. But some of the other butlers can."

Prytania sat down, smoothing out her skirt and looking intently at the man in front of her. "Do you think you can get me to go down there myself? Even I know that Alluka is dangerous."

"No need to go down there yourself, Patricia."

"It's Prytania."

"Right, right. All you need to do, is tell whoever it is you report to the location I give you."

"You think I'm reporting to someone about this?"

"I know you are."

"And if I don't, you'll tell Kikyo about Hisoka."

"I won't tell her about Hisoka, oh no. I still need him. I'll just tell her that you were seen... cavorting... with a butler."

"A case of adultery would break my contract and be cause for expulsion or even death."

"Hey, I'm not the one who had sex with your husband's lover on your wedding night. That's on you."

Prytania said nothing, thinking everything over in her head.

Chrollo chuckled to himself. "You know, funny you should use the word adultery. It is one of the big no-no's, not even in just your contract. Everyone agrees it's one of the worst sins you could commit. It's one of the big ten sins, and the wages of sin is death."

Prytania's eyes opened wide, and she looked up. "I guess I need to make a phone call."

"That's right, sweetheart."

"Ugh. Don't call me that. Just learn my name, won't you?"

Prytania stood up again, ready to leave.

"Hey, hey hey." Chrollo grabbed her arm gently. She ripped it out of his hand.

"Don't touch me."

"There's no need for us to be enemies, you know." Chrollo moved closer to her. "I don't have any beef with you. In fact, I could use someone like you. That clown thinks he has you figured out, doesn't he? And Illumi must trust you to some extent. Considering you're not dead right now even after boning his precious magician."

Prytania moved away from Chrollo as he advanced. He continued, "When all is said and done, you realize you have the power to gain so much. Imagine how much your company will praise you when you deliver to them such a powerful weapon. And in the end, maybe you and I can be... friends."

"What makes you think I'd want to be friends with someone who doesn't even remember my name?"

"Prytania, you know I was just messing with you."

Prytania found herself backed into a wall. Chrollo placed his hand above her, looking down. "I thought since you're a clown fucker you'd have a little sense of humor."

"Sorry to disappoint you, but I don't think you're very funny at all."

Chrollo leaned in close. "You know, I can see why Hisoka liked you. He probably left with Illumi because had he stayed, he'd rip you to pieces. You know he stays awake at night thinking about ways to murder you."

Prytania swallowed.

Chrollo leaned in close to whisper in her ear. "If you ever want to have some fun, we could always..."

"What is WRONG with you?" Prytania pushed Chrollo away from her, disgusted.

Chrollo laughed hard, holding his chest. "Now THAT is precious. If you could see the look on your face!" You're too fun. Hisoka was right."

"What do you mean Hisoka was right?! Did he-"

"He told me to have a little fun with you while he was gone. 'Said it'd be worth seeing you squirm. He was right."

Prytania's face was redder than radishes. "That asshole."

Chrollo caught his breath. "It still stands, though. My blackmail is real, although the proposition for sex wasn't. Please don't try to fuck me."

"Believe me, I'm not going to." Prytania crossed her arms.

"Good. Make that phone call, I'll be waiting for their response." Chrollo winked at her, and she rolled her eyes. He disappeared through the servant's side door.

"Guess I have to make a phone call." Prytania said to herself.

…...

Illumi had thoroughly read through each file and decided on the best course of action for each target. He glanced at the digital clock. He'd been sitting alone for about an hour. Hisoka was probably finishing up his hair by now.

Illumi stood from his spot and began to walk towards the exit passageway, which was near the bar. As he approached, he noticed some people huddled around a small television set. Different people mumbled here and there, and normally, Illumi would ignore people huddled around a TV at a bar, but he could clearly see it was a newscast and not just some useless TV show.

Getting closer, he could hear the newscaster speak clearly.

" _Officials are still on the hunt for a man who may have answers to who killed successful business woman Nadya Morrow and her son, Albert Morrow. The man is none other than Nadia's estranged husband, Hisoka Morrow."_

Hisoka's face showed on the screen as Illumi watched on.

 _"Morrow is a notorious Heaven's Arena Champion who has been missing since before his wife and son's murder. Many remember the grizzly story of the woman, her son, and a hotel receptionist who were found dead by housekeeping in early April. Rival businessman Lagola Tigre, was arrested under suspicion of hiring an assassin to dispatch the family but has since been released. Yorknew authorities plead with citizens of the surrounding Heaven's Arena area to contact local authorities if anyone has any information about Hisoka Morrow's whereabouts. Officials in Heaven's Arena have been cooperative, the game master speaking out that Morrow has not been seen at all this year in any of the tournaments. We have correspondent Butch Yakov at the Heaven's Arena first floor with local fans of the fighter. Yakov?"_

Illumi watched as a reporter stood surrounded by weeping fans, most of them wearing shirts with Hisoka's face on them. The majority of them were young girls. The reporter asked a question to one of them, holding out his mic. Illumi didn't care for hearing the rest of the broadcast. He turned to walk away but could still hear all of Hisoka's fans crying over how much they missed him. Illumi scoffed.

Illumi left the lounge and headed towards his and Hisoka's shared room. Hisoka lay on the bed with his hair wrapped up in a towel. He was completely naked otherwise. A house of cards, which Hisoka was apparently working on, fell as Illumi closed the door.

"Illumi, darling!" Hisoka piped up, ignoring that his cards were now scattered.

Illumi looked at him with a cold expression. "You must really be itching to fight someone."

Hisoka raised a brow at Illumi. "Fighting is optimal, but since we're on this airship we can't exactly go all out."

Illumi crossed his arms. "How many fans do you have near Heaven's Arena?"

Hisoka sat up at the question. "I don't know. A lot probably. Why do you ask?"

"Because as you know, that's where we're headed. I just saw a newscast naming you as a person of interest in a certain murder case."

"Ah, well. That happens from time to time. Nothing ever sticks, I assure you." Hisoka relaxed on the bed amongst his cards, propping his head up with one hand and resting his other on his side.

"You didn't commit this one." Illumi spoke as he walked over to the bed, glancing at the fallen house of cards.

"Oh. Well at least I have my loyal boyfriend to vouch for me, but if someone thinks I killed someone it is usually the case." Hisoka flicked his wrist, and the cards flung towards his hand, landing in a perfect deck in his palm.

"Not this time. It's your late wife."

"Ah. Her. That was your handiwork." Hisoka shuffled his deck nonchalantly.

Illumi sat on the bed now that it had been cleared of cards. "Do you think any of your fans will be able to recognize you under your disguise?"

"I hardly recognize me."

"I'd rather not take any chances."

"What do you me-" Hisoka felt needle pressure plunge into the side of his face, and another in his shoulder. His bones felt as if they were moving and breaking out of place. He couldn't see it, but Illumi watched as his skin stretched to give him a different face and shoulder width. His hair turned blonde and his face slimed while his shoulders grew wider.

Four agonizing seconds passed. Hisoka's pain tolerance was commendable, Illumi noted. He didn't scream, he didn't flail. He just let it happen. Once the transformation was over, Hisoka grunted.

"That hurt."

"You deal well with pain."

"Am I ugly now?"

"Very."

"Change me back."

"No."

Hisoka reached to pull the needle that was in his shoulder out. Illumi stopped him. "Hisoka, if you take that out I'll have to put it back in once the airship lands."

"Don't you think that's up to me to decide?"

Illumi blinked. "Absolutely not. I can't risk you- Hey stop!" Illumi protested as Hisoka pulled out the pins, first his shoulder, then the other on the side of his face. This time, Illumi could see Hisoka gritting through the pain as he changed back.

"You big baby." Illumi scoffed as he lay down on the bed.

Hisoka was sweating, and he huffed. His skin was red with blood pulsing through him.

"Hey, Illumi?"

"Hm...?"

Illumi didn't blink as Hisoka punched him in the face. It was unexpected, and Illumi looked over at the man with his arm outstretched above him. Hisoka had held back his punch so as not to injure him, but it hurt nonetheless.

"What was that for?"

Hisoka inhaled before saying, "Don't mess with my bones and shit without my permission."

"Your permission?"

Hisoka laughed softly, looking down at the privileged rich boy underneath him. "You don't own me, Illumi. You can't just manipulate my body like that without warning."

"But isn't that exactly what you are? You changed your appearance so you could hide and be with me in the mansion."

"That was different. I chose to hide my true appearance from your family. That was of my own doing. You cannot choose for me what I do with my body."

Illumi tilted his head, studying Hisoka. Up until now, it hadn't really come up, but Illumi always assumed that relationships always went like this. That they belonged to each other and therefore could do whatever they wanted with each other. "Then what's the point of being in a relationship?"

Illumi's question came as a surprise to Hisoka. "For fun, but mostly for fucking." Hisoka shrugged.

Illumi's puzzled face was priceless. Hisoka laughed.

"Hisoka," Illumi started, "as much fun as intercourse is, even I know that's not the only reason."

Hisoka sat back on his knees, still straddling Illumi on the bed. "You're right. Some relationships are purely business."

"What's the objective of our relationship, Hisoka?"

"Objective?"

"What purpose does it serve?" Illumi stared up at Hisoka.

"For what purpose do you keep me around, you mean?" Hisoka placed his hand on Illumi's abdomen. He smiled. "If you don't have any obvious use for me, you _could_ just get rid of me, right? I'm not helping you achieve any goal as of right now. You don't need me, really. In fact, I'm a nuisance, aren't I? Sneaking around your family, planning your jobs so as to be able to also spend time with me... I'm causing you to expend extra energy. And for what? For what purpose?" Hisoka slid his hands up Illumi's torso.

"I asked you the question, you were supposed to answer it for me." Illumi said, annoyed.

"I do have an answer."

"And what is it?"

"You want to use me." Hisoka shifted his weight, sliding himself against Illumi.

"That's not true." Illumi slid his hand up Hisoka's abdomen to his torso, his perfectly manicured hand passing over Hisoka's nipple. Hisoka shivered.

"Tell me what you want to use me for."

"I'm not trying to use you." Illumi caressed Hisoka's neck, gripping it tenderly, but just firm enough to flirt with the idea of choking him.

Hisoka licked his lips, grinding on Illumi in a downright obscene manner. Illumi sighed. His body always betrayed him. He wanted to assert control over Hisoka, to show him that he was very much owned, but right now Hisoka's movements and his position kept him in control of the situation.

Illumi began to sit up, but Hisoka approached his face with a kiss. Illumi kissed back. This was Hisoka after all, kissing him couldn't hurt.

Every affection given thus far had served Illumi well. Hisoka had willingly became a butler in his home to serve Illumi because of his loyalty for him even after Illumi had murdered Hisoka's contract wife and child. Hisoka had even promised to take Illumi out of his household. Hisoka belonged to him, and all Illumi had to do was pay him with his body and attention. This was the arrangement Illumi had mapped out rationally in his head. It made sense to him. It made perfect sense. So, letting Hisoka think that he wasn't, in fact, owned, probably was for the best.

Hisoka ran his hands up Illumi's sides and to the back of his neck. He broke their kiss and whispered into Illumi's ear, "Would you kill me if I said I wasn't yours?"

Illumi's breath caught in his throat.

Hisoka kept speaking. "Would you gut me if I told you again that you don't own me?"

It was Illumi's turn now to shiver.

Hisoka purred, "Do you think about killing me?"

Illumi's shallow sigh was more than an answer.

Hisoka gripped tighter into the back of Illumi's hair. "Do you think about killing me?" Hisoka asked again, his voice low, a sinister whisper.

Illumi tightened his grip on Hisoka's throat, digging his nails into the sides of his neck. "You'd like that to occupy my mind, wouldn't you?" Illumi smiled, controlling his breath.

Hisoka smiled back, his teeth gleaming. "So, then you won't mind if when we step off this airship, I stay in Heaven's Arena?"

Illumi pushed Hisoka away gently to look at him. Hisoka's towel had unwrapped and fallen to his side on the bed, showing his newly dyed hair. It was red.

"I thought you said you didn't want to dye your hair red if we were going to go back so soon?"

Hisoka watch Illumi's eyes carefully, releasing his grip on his hair gently. "Just for the week. I'll be good and stay in Heaven's Arena."

"No." Illumi's voice was dry as he spoke. He tried pushing Hisoka off of him so he could walk away, but he couldn't move. He looked around himself and realized his whole torso was covered in bungee gum.

"Let me go, Hisoka."

"Only if you say you'll let me go."

"The only way you're leaving me is in a casket." Illumi's voice was deadly and commanding. It was hypnotizing, even. Hisoka even wondered if Illumi was currently attempting to control Hisoka's mind.

Hisoka pushed Illumi back down to the bed with ease. "Ah, there it is. That wonderful temper, rearing its beautiful head again. Tell me, Illumi. If you were going to kill me, how would you do it? Would you kill me from behind, like you did my wife? Or would you look me in the eye like you did my son?"

"I thought that didn't matter to you."

"I was only jealous that they got to see the look on your face as you killed them." Hisoka's words were dripping with something untethered. Illumi had almost forgotten how twisted Hisoka really was, but it thrilled him.

"If you keep on like this then you might see it." Illumi threatened. His hands were bungee gummed to the bed. He was completely helpless against Hisoka. If he truly wanted to, Hisoka could kill him right there on the first-class airship bed. Such a shameful death it would be.

Hisoka sighed, rubbing his hand over Illumi's shoulder. "Would you kill me if...?" Hisoka opened Illumi's shirt, exposing the x-shaped scar on the left side of his chest. "Would you kill me if I broke our promise again?"

Illumi's vision drifted away from Hisoka, and focused somewhere on the ceiling. Hisoka caressed Illumi's scar. It hadn't raised like Hisoka's had. Instead, it was a deep, dark mark contrasting Illumi's pale skin.

"What was it we said again? 'Cross my heart and hope to die?' Whatever it was, I broke it, didn't I?"

Illumi's breathed harshly, remembering what Hisoka had done.

Hisoka continued. "You know she asked about what my scar was. She asked about all my scars."

Illumi looked directly into Hisoka's eyes now.

"You never asked about my scars, Illumi."

Bloodlust like Hisoka had never seen before swirled around them both, creating an almost unbreathable pressure. Hisoka cackled like a mad man, until he felt the sudden grip on his throat, nearly crushing his windpipe.

"YOU. WOULDN'T. DARE."

Illumi's voice was barely human. It was a glorious monstrosity, and Hisoka was its target.

"NOT. AGAIN." Illumi spoke again, the sound deafening.

Hisoka slipped out of Illumi's grasp and leapt away from him.

Hisoka laughed from his gut as he stood there in the room, still naked. "Come at me, Illumi! Come at me with all you have!" Hisoka released his bungee gum grip on Illumi.

Not even a second after he had let him go, Illumi was on him. He punched him, and Hisoka's body went through the door, breaking it as he went through it and into the hallway.

He briefly noticed a woman scream in the hallway when she saw the naked man crash into the corridor. Hisoka was smiling as he stood up. "Don't worry, I get that reaction all the time, miss."

Hisoka ducked as Illumi's fist flew past him and into the wall behind him, cracking the wall. Illumi slowly turned to look at Hisoka, who straightened up to look at him.

"You know, that looks like that would have hurt." Illumi threw another punch, and then another, and another. Illumi and Hisoka eventually made their way back into the lounge, leaving a trail of crumbling walls behind them. The open space was more than a friend to Hisoka. He moved like a circus acrobat, dodging every blow with a flip or a high jump. Mothers covered their children's eyes at the scene and ran.

"Come on, Illumi! Is that all you've got?"

Illumi landed a punch to Hisoka's torso, knocking the air out of him and propelling him against the window in the lounge. People gasped.

Hisoka coughed, trying to get air back, he barely had time to breathe before having to dodge another attack. Illumi's fist met with the thick glass overlooking the clouds. A loud crack resounded throughout the lounge. Dust fell from the ceiling and the lights flickered.

"H-Hey now, Illumi." Hisoka said shakily. "Are you really trying to kill me?"

"You're mine, Hisoka!" Illumi's eyes were fearsome balls of rage, his bloodlust twisting the air around him in a black haze.

"You got to catch me first, babe!" Hisoka ran around Illumi, and Illumi attacked, sending the lounge furniture flying across the room.

Hisoka ran back around Illumi, his back facing the large window again. Illumi pinned Hisoka to the window.

Illumi threw his punch at Hisoka, but he dodged the right, and again Illumi's fist met with the window, and the crack in it grew. The lights shut off and the emergency backup lights turned on. People screamed and ran around as an alarm began to sound.

"I'll kill you, Hisoka!" Illumi punched Hisoka in the chest, forcing his back against the widow. Hisoka coughed up blood and the window cracked again. Illumi readied his arm to punch him again.

"You know, Illumi, I've never lost a fight before." Illumi stopped, looking at Hisoka. His bloodlust calmed.

"You haven't defended yourself once." Illumi said softly.

"Your wife called." Hisoka smiled, his teeth bloodied. Illumi's brows furrowed, searching Hisoka for answers.

Hisoka chuckled. "You're a little scary when you're trying to kill me."

"What is this about, Hisoka?!" Illumi's voice raised.

"Let's break up." Hisoka whispered.

Illumi looked at the bloodied man before him, laughing like a madman.

"Break... up?" Illumi repeated. His blood boiled all over again. "Break up? Hisoka? I'll break you!" Illumi thrust his fist forward, and as he did Hisoka unpinned himself from Illumi's other hand and dodged his fist, embracing Illumi just as the window shattered against the force of Illumi's punch.

Immediately, the air rushed around them as the pressure in the airship destabilized. The window broke entirely, forcing everything in the lounge to be sucked out, Hisoka and Illumi included.

...

Chapter 19, Fin~

Note:

EHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE

It's not over, folks. I promise.

Damn that was a satisfying chapter to write.

Pretty please let me know what you think of the story so far, reviews make my day.

And thank you to everyone who have written reviews in the previous chapters, you are my motivation lol.

I'm thinking of doing an overhaul of some of the earlier chapters, mostly because I wrote those whist drunk off my ass and didn't do any spell checking lol. I think you as readers deserve at least half-decent writing and I read my old chapters recently and cringed so hard.

This story was just going to be a side project that I was going to finish quickly and then I fell in love with the story and now we're Nineteen chapters in holy moly.

So, yeah. Thanks for reading!

Love, Fluff Papa.


	20. Death Lie

The sound of the wind blowing past was deafening. Illumi now held on to Hisoka every bit as Hisoka held on to him, face to face, as they fell through the air away from the airship. Illumi could see Hisoka mouthing something at him, but he couldn't hear anything over the sound of the soaring wind.

Behind them, the airship they were just on spewed debris from inside of the now depressurized lounge. Illumi could see one of the pieces rupture a different part of the airship's hull. Another piece seemed to fly into an engine. It exploded, and the force pushed them further away as they plummeted further down towards the earth. Illumi shut his eyes for a moment, trying to protect himself from the shards of dust and metal from the ship. When he opened his eyes, Hisoka was smiling a wild, sinister smile at him. The now exploded airship began to fall right out of the same sky they were in. Other people seemed to be falling around them, some passed out, and some apparently screaming, but the air was so loud nothing could be heard above it.

Illumi wanted to scream at Hisoka, but as he looked at the madman in front of him, he decided to save his breath. Hisoka's teeth gleamed, and his hair flew in around in every direction as they held their embrace.

Hisoka had apparently decided to kill them both, and this is where it would all end. It wasn't so bad, Illumi thought. In the grand scheme of things, this wasn't the death Illumi expected. He always assumed he'd be assassinated, and in most of the scenarios he pictured himself getting killed by his own brother, Killua, or maybe even Kalluto. This was not at all the demise he'd pictured.

Just as he thought this, Hisoka reached his hand to touch his shoulder. A piece of what looked like skin colored cloth flew away from Hisoka's body to reveal a backpack with a red string on the strap.

" _You've got to be fucking kidding me._ " Illumi spoke to himself, knowing that Hisoka couldn't hear him.

Illumi held on to Hisoka as the red-haired magician pulled on the string, releasing the parachute strapped to his back. The wind caught in it, pulling them upwards for a moment before slowing them down as they approached the ground.

The landed in a grassy field, and ungracefully they rolled into it, getting grass and dirt all over both of them.

Illumi unwrapped himself from Hisoka, and took several steps away before throwing up, hunched over. Hisoka quickly unbuckled his parachute from himself and walked over to hold Illumi's hair.

…..

Illumi wiped his mouth and stood. Hisoka was in front of him with his hands on his hips. Illumi sighed, and then threw a punch at Hisoka.

Hisoka caught his fist, and Illumi threw another punch. Hisoka caught the second one, too.

Hisoka began laughing hysterically. "You love me! You really, _actually_ love me!" Hisoka laughed again, and Illumi watched, confused.

"What the fuck, Hisoka?!" Illumi's voice was deep with anger.

Hisoka caught his breath and jumped towards Illumi, kissing him. Illumi pushed him off.

"Explain yourself!"

Hisoka breathed triumphantly. "You, Illumi Zoldyck, Assassin of Assassins, the emotionless killer, _you_. You!"

"What about me?!" Illumi's frustration was at an all-time high.

" _You_ had _every_ intention of killing me."

Illumi blinked. "Yes of course I had every intention of killing you! You said you want to break up!"

Hisoka laughed again, holding his hand to his chest and jumping up and down in place. "You were going to kill me if I tried to break up with you!"

Illumi's face felt hot with anger. "What's your fucking point, Hisoka?!"

Hisoka bit his lip, and his eyes seemed to roll back into his skull in delight. He huffed, looking at Illumi, "Listen, Illumi, I know you've said you loved me, but I've never seen you be so- so- _possessive_."

As Hisoka laughed, he was met with Illumi's fist, and fell to the ground. He laid there for not even a second before laughing again. "Okay, that was fair."

"All this time I've been telling you that I love you but you didn't _believe me_?"

Hisoka lay on the grass, laughing in something similar to what Illumi expected joy to look like. Hisoka sighed. "I believed you, but there was nothing like actually trying to dodge your death blow to really sink the feeling."

Illumi looked down at Hisoka as he stood up. "You know, Hisoka _I_ may have issues but you're just as bad."

Hisoka smiled a cheesy grin. "I know."

Illumi took a deep breath, calming himself. "So, then we're not breaking up?"

"What? No, we're not breaking up!"

Illumi couldn't help but breathe out heavily, relieved.

Hisoka chuckled again and said, "So, how does it feel to be dead?"

"What do you mean? I'm very much alive."

"That airship. Everyone on it is going to die, if they're not already. They'll report you, and your butler Hiro, deceased."

Illumi looked around. They were far enough away from where the airship crashed that all they could see was a plume of smoke lifting into the air. They were close enough to smell the stench of oil and burning flesh drifting their way.

Illumi looked back to Hisoka. "You _planned_ this?"

"You wanted freedom. Now you have it. Your family will think you're dead, and you can do whatever you want."

"That would explain the texture surprise hidden parachute..." Illumi mumbled to himself. He placed his hand on his chin as he thought for a moment. "My remains won't be among the wreckage; my family will come looking for me."

"Bodies go missing all the time. Besides, if you _really_ want to, we can kill someone nearby and toast them up nice and proper."

"And what about Chrollo? He's still-"

"Prytania's going to take excellent care of Chrollo. Don't worry."

Illumi squinted at Hisoka. "So, what are we going to do now?"

"Well, since _I,_ Hisoka Morrow _,_ wasn't actually on that airship, we're going to Heaven's Arena. I have a floor to get back to, and you can stay there."

"Hisoka, you beautiful, fucking idiot."

"What?"

"What am I supposed to do without my family? If they think I'm dead I won't get jobs from them to assassinate people, what the fuck am I supposed to do?"

"Illumi, you can stay with me at Heaven's arena. Besides, eventually you were going to be on your own anyway, right?"

"Mother was going to arrange for me to still take jobs even after Killua took power! I would have been set for life!"

Hisoka pulled Illumi by his collar and pulled him close. "You wanted a way out. Do you really want to spend the rest of your life under your mother's thumb? And what about Prytania? Till death do you part, right? Well congratulations, Illumi. Death has parted you." Hisoka let go of Illumi forcefully and stepped back. "Illumi, I've given you this opportunity. You can come with me to Heaven's arena and fight under any disguise you'd like. Re-invent yourself. Make your own business as an assassin, if you really feel like it. Let your family mourn you, and never look back. Or, you can go back to them and continue living miserably."

Illumi's face was blank as he processed Hisoka's words.

"Do what you want." Hisoka began walking east, towards the city.

Illumi glanced west, at the wreckage of the airship. Another explosion sent fire and smoke into the air.

Illumi sighed. "It's not even noon." He walked east, towards Hisoka. The magician looked back at Illumi following him and smiled.

Illumi smiled back, and chuckled.

"What's so funny?" Hisoka asked as Illumi caught up to him.

"You're still naked."

Hisoka chuckled. "Of course, what better way to get rid of that itchy butler's uniform?"

…...

Prytania walked through the gardens, escorted by Amane. It was still early in the afternoon, but she was tired of being escorted around the estate all day. She had only one moment to herself earlier, and she used it to call Hisoka, of all people.

She sighed, looking over the rose bushes. "Where are you?" She whispered to herself.

"Have you called your company?" Amane spoke from where she stood about three feet behind Prytania.

Prytania breathed in the fresh air, sniffing it, as if looking for something. She crinkled her nose.

"Hello?" Amane tapped her foot.

"Ah, so you're working with Chrollo, I see." Prytania turned to stare at the young butler. "You should really be wary of him, you know. He's bad news."

Amane turned her eyes away from Prytania's gaze, choosing to look at the floor instead. "I..." Finding her words, Amane looked up to meet Prytania's eyes. "I asked you a question."

Prytania crossed her arms. "I made the call that I needed to make."

Amane nodded. "Good."

Prytania turned back to look at the flowers. They were all so beautiful, but they smelled awful, like rotting flesh. Prytania frowned before walking further through the garden, and stopping in front of a yellow rose bush. Amane moved slowly along with her.

"You know, Amane. He'll betray you."

"No, he won't. You're the one who threw me under the bus when it came down to it, not him."

Prytania scoffed. "I didn't really have a choice."

Amane stomped her foot. "You did have a choice! It was telling the truth or let me die!"

Prytania shot Amane a glare. "You really are a child. It was my life on the line, Amane and you know it! The Zoldycks would have killed me if I admitted to knowing anything more than I let on, so I made a choice! It was going to be your life or mine and I chose accordingly. Call me selfish but you would have done the same. Also, if I remember correctly, you didn't die, did you!"

"My, my..." Chrollo's voice startled Prytania. He leaned against a tree in the shade several feet away. "So we've resorted to yelling at children, have we Prytania?"

"You're one to talk. You're the one using her."

"Like the young lady said, at least I didn't sell her out."

Prytania's knuckles grew white as she stared at the man in the garden.

Chrollo looked over to Amane. "Dear, I'll keep an eye on her. You may go."

"Wait!" Prytania held her hand out, gesturing Amane to stop before she left. "Before she goes, why don't you tell her, _Mr. Gardener_ , who you have buried under the flowerbed?"

Chrollo's brows furrowed at the question.

Amane's brows furrowed. "What?"

Chrollo tilted his head. "I don't know what you're talking about."

Prytania looked over to Amane. "Amane, don't these rose bushes smell off?"

"What do you mean?"

"You don't smell that? The smell of rot and decay?"

Chrollo stood straight and took a few steps towards the two. Prytania raised her other hand, telling him to stop where he was. Chrollo halted and squinted at Prytania, then looked to Amane.

"Amane, whatever she's telling you, don't listen to her, okay?"

Amane looked between the two of them, not sure what to believe.

"Amane..." Prytania started, "I know you don't trust me, and I have no right to ask you to trust me, but you have to trust me this once. Just- just look under the rose bushes."

Amane took a step back towards the rose bushes but kept an eye on Chrollo.

Chrollo moved forward towards the girl, and Amane stopped in her tracks. Before he could get any closer, two pins struck Chrollo in the chest. They weren't very deep, not enough to kill him at least, but they were deep enough to make him wince. He looked around for a black-haired assassin, but instead his eyes met with the outstretched arm of a small blonde woman.

"Illumi taught you...?"

"The rose bushes, Amane!"

Amane ran over quickly to the rose bushes. Chrollo rushed forward but Prytania was ready to attack again, this time using her fists. Chrollo easily caught her arm, twisting it down and bringing Prytania to her knees as she cried out in pain. Amane dug quickly into the black dirt. It smelled like death and her hands caught on the thorns, making her bleed. She could hear behind her the snapping of what she assumed was Prytania's arm, followed by her screaming. She knew Chrollo was walking towards her, she could feel his heavy steps against the cobblestone. Just a little further.

Amane's hands touched something cold, and hard. She moved her hand away, and saw a nose sticking up at her from the dirt. She could feel Chrollo's shadow looming over her, but she needed to know who it was. She had to. Just one more scoop of dirt.

Just as she braced for whatever death was sure to come for her, a voice startled her. Kikyo's voice.

"What's going on here?!" She shouted.

Amane could still hear Prytania's cries from where she left her to Chrollo. She dared not look at the woman, but instead looked at the lady of the house, the one she and so many other butlers so despised, and shouted, "There's a body here!"

There was a small silence between Kikyo registering what the butler said and her reaction.

"Who is it?" Kikyo moved forward without caution, and Chrollo stepped to the side. Amane brushed the remaining dirt from the face of whoever unfortunate soul was buried there. Pale skin decorated in specs of dirt and blood lay there in front of her in an eternal sleep. It wasn't the first time Amane had seen a body, but it was the first time she had seen one so close. She stood away from it, holding her dirtied hands away from her as if they, too, were somehow infected with death.

"Sasha... from the kitchen staff." Kikyo spoke softly. "He always chops the vegetables so finely, the way I like them."

Amane looked at the lady of the house, who stared at the unearthed flowerbed grave. Kikyo's expressions were always difficult to read, what with her visor always covering her eyes, but in this instance, Amane knew this was more than just mild annoyance. It was anger.

Kikyo turned to look at Chrollo, as if to ask what had happened, but he was gone.

"Amane." Kikyo's voice was commanding, and firm. The young butler responded silently with a firm and quick nod.

"Find Silva and Zeno. Tell them Chrollo has killed a butler. If you find Gotoh, you tell him too."

Amane nodded.

"Go now! Hurry!"

The young butler sprinted away with determination in her eyes and her objective burning inside her.

Kikyo rushed over to Prytania, who was now passed out on the ground. She carefully lifted the petite woman and made her way quickly to the infirmary.

…...

Gotoh gently placed the receiver down on its placeholder. His expression was grim as he stood alone by the phone.

The creak of the office door as it opened behind him wasn't enough to draw him out of his thoughts.

"Gotoh! Sasha is dead. Chrollo killed him!"

Gotoh turned to see little Amane standing at the door, breathing hard as if she had run there. She swallowed a heavy breath as she tried to wet her mouth again to speak.

"The garden. He's buried- Chrollo buried him in the garden." Amane panted out her words out, waiting for Gotoh to say something or to look shocked. After a moment of silence, Amane caught her breath and continued. "He's been recruiting the other butlers, but I think Sasha didn't want to join him, so he murdered him and buried him under the roses."

Gotoh quivered. "So, this was Chrollo's plan..." Gotoh mumbled to himself quietly. "Amane?" Gotoh's voice was firmer this time.

"Yes?"

"Have you told the Master of the House of Chrollo's deed?"

"I'm about to, once I find him."

"Very well. I'm assuming Chrollo has others that he's attempted to convince to follow him. I can't send a message through the intercom or I'd alert any butlers loyal to Chrollo. You must find Silva yourself and tell him of what's happening."

"Yes, of course." Amane breathed out and moved to turn away and leave. Gotoh stopped her.

"Also tell him that Illumi is dead."

Amane's eyes widened. "I'm sorry, what?"

"I just received news that his airship exploded. There were no survivors."

Amane's legs shook, and she wasn't sure if it was because of the running she just did or because of the news she just heard.

"This... this has to be a dream." Amane said quietly. "Illumi is dead… after everything he's done. I never thought I'd live to see this day."

"Amane!" Gotoh yelled at the girl, and she snapped out of her thoughts.

" _Illumi is dead_. I will ignore what you just said because we are in a time of crisis, but if you say even one more ill word of any member of the family I _will_ kill you."

Amane nodded. "I understand."

"Go find Silva. I must inform Lady Kikyo."

Amane nodded and scurried away. She ran through the hallways, nearly knocking a few of her butlers down. She didn't have time to apologize properly, but instead just yelled a quick 'sorry' as she kept running.

…...

Kikyo reached the family infirmary with Prytania in her arms.

Dr. Ito saw the two come in and scrambled to get up from where she sat at her microscope.

"My god, this woman again? Did she get poisoned?"

"Broken arm. She got into a little fight."

"Ah. Nothing I haven't done before. We'll need to take X-rays. Bring her over here."

Prytania started coming to as she felt cold metal underneath her skin. She looked up to see a bright light looking down at her. She squinted as she looked around.

"Oh no, she's awake." Prytania could recognize the doctor's voice. She had met her when she was poisoned, and she had meant to thank her for treating her but meeting her like this again would have to do for now.

"Doctor..."

"Prytania. We're going to have to stretch your arm."

"Wait. No, don't-" Before Prytania could finish her protest, her arm was already moving. The pain made her vision go white, and it shot up through her body, making her head pound. She didn't even realize she was screaming until she felt some kind of strap go into her mouth. She gladly bit into it, silencing her screams. It tasted like leather. She could feel warm tears dripping down the sides of her face.

"That should help. We're going to move your arm again."

Prytania bit down as her arm was moved again, and she breathed hard, taking the pain as it came. She looked to her side to see Dr. Ito quickly step behind a wall. There was a beep, and the doctor stepped back in.

"See? You're done. I'll take a look at your X-rays."

Prytania nodded, and the woman stepped away. Prytania spit out the leather strap and sobbed.

"Shh, child." Kikyo's voice was soft, almost nurturing.

Prytania breathed, trying to calm herself.

"Prytania, you did so well."

At those words, Prytania focused on her mother-in-law, who stood over her.

"You were protecting Amane, weren't you?"

Prytania was puzzled. All this time she assumed Kikyo had never bothered to learn any of her butler's names, but she had spoken two butler's names in front of her in the same day, and now instead of being wary of her, she felt comforted.

Kikyo seemed to read her mind. "Prytania, I know I come off as someone who doesn't care about the people my husband employs to protect us, and that's mostly true."

Prytania's brows furrowed at the admission. Kikyo continued, "But the butlers are part of the estate. They are my property, and no one, absolutely no one, fucks with my property."

The blonde didn't know how to process what Kikyo had just said. In a way, it was somehow worse than what she assumed. To Kikyo the butlers were a piece of property, she owned them. They were her toys to throw away, not anyone else's. In the same breath, that meant Kikyo would always protect them from outside threat.

"Is that why they're so loyal to you?" Prytania's voice was small and hoarse.

"Of course." Kikyo reached her hand out to wipe Prytania's tears. Prytania shivered as Kikyo's hands touched hers. Her fingers were cold against her face.

Kikyo took her hand back once the tears had been dried. She smiled at Prytania. "I knew you'd be a good match for our family."

"Wh- Why?"

"You found exposed Chrollo's agenda and protected my butlers."

Prytania nodded.

The doctor came back into the room with the black X-ray sheets and placed them on a light box on the wall. She turned the box on.

"That's a messy break if I've ever seen one. That's a comminuted fracture." Dr. Ito pointed at the glowing white image against the black sheet of the X-ray. "You see that? That kind of fracture usually happens with incredible force. Most commonly seen in vehicle accidents. Some of the injuries I normally see are about this bad, but it's not something that just happens in a regular fight. Who did you tango with, my dear?"

Prytania grunted. "Chrollo. He was going to attack Amane."

Dr. Ito turned to look at Prytania. "Chrollo? You're sure _he_ killed Sasha?"

"It's true." Kikyo interjected. "The man killed Sasha and buried him under the roses."

Dr. Ito turned to look back at the X-rays. "Why... why would he kill Sasha?"

Prytania eyed the doctor, then looked to Kikyo as the lady of the house spoke again. "We believe he's been recruiting butlers to join him for some kind of mission. Sasha must not have wanted to join."

Prytania whispered to Kikyo. "Kikyo, if Chrollo was recruiting butlers, who do you think he would recruit first?"

Kikyo looked down at Prytania, suddenly understanding her meaning. She reached into her hair and pulled out a metal chopstick. She turned just as Dr. Ito was grabbing a scalpel from her pocket. Dr. Ito turned to throw it at Kikyo, but Kikyo's chopstick was already in the air.

It plunged into the doctor's forehead, killing her instantly.

Kikyo's black hair fell from its up-do, and Dr. Ito's body fell into a heap on the floor.

"I guess Sasha isn't the only butler we lose tonight." Kikyo sighed.

"Who's going to fix my arm now?" Prytania whined.

"Me." Kikyo walked away from the bed.

"Wait-" Prytania tried sitting up, but with only one arm to hold her up there was no way she could sit up smoothly without moving her other arm. She lay back down.

"I'm trained medically." Prytania could hear Kikyo rummaging through a cabinet. Kikyo spoke loudly so that Prytania could hear her. "My boys have always been getting into all kinds of squabbles. I've seen my fair share of fractures long before we ever hired the recently deceased Dr. Ito."

Prytani glanced to the side. She could see Dr. Ito's body lying on the floor, blood pooling around her short hair.

"She was right, you've got a pretty bad fracture. It wasn't a clean break at all." Kikyo returned to the room, setting various bottles down on a table nearby. She came back into Prytania's range of vision holding a syringe. "You'll need internal fixation surgery to remove the bone fragments that broke off. We can't have that floating in there to tear up your muscles. I'll take it out for you."

"Are you a doctor...?"

Before Prytania could ask any more questions, Kikyo stuck her in the arm with the needle, and then placed a breathing mask over her face. Prytania suddenly felt so relaxed. She rested against the table and breathed in the air was rushing into her lungs, letting her thoughts escape her as she fell asleep.

…...

Amane had looked in Silva's room only to find it empty. She headed to the family's gymnasium. She hadn't checked the time before leaving Gotoh's office, and had she checked the time before she would have gone to look for him at the gymnasium first instead of going to his room. It was all so hectic. She turned the corner, ready to burst through the doors of the gymnasium and tell Silva everything.

Three butlers stood in front of the doors. They wore frowns on their faces and they kept their arms crossed. It didn't take Amane long to piece together that Chrollo had recruited them.

"You know better than to interrupt Silva while he's training."

This was bad. Amane looked at the three butlers in front of her. Leah, Farzan, and Miller. Leah was from the Kitchen staff. Amane looked at her, wondering if she knew about her colleague in the rose bushes.

"Chrollo killed Sasha." Amane held her fists to her side.

Miller scoffed. "Chrollo already told us you'd say anything to get through the doors. It's not going to work"

"This isn't a lie. _Leah_. Think about it. When was the last time you saw Sasha."

Farzan looked to Leah. "Don't listen to her, she's lying."

Leah concentrated for a moment. "I saw him... I saw him..."

"You can't remember seeing him yesterday or this morning, can you?"

"Leah," Farzan spoke softly, "don't let her get into your head."

Amane exhaled. "You all said yes to join Chrollo's mission because of how badly we get treated, right?"

The three of them nodded. Amane continued, "What if you had said no?"

Leah looked at the butlers standing next to her. Amane spoke again. "Everybody knows Sasha would never betray the Zoldycks. He probably told Chrollo no, and Chrollo murdered him so he wouldn't talk!"

Miller punched the wall to his left. "Then Sasha was a fool!"

"No!" Leah yelled at Miller. "If Chrollo truly killed Sasha, then he's no better than the Zoldycks!"

The three of them began to argue, and Amane could tell if she wasn't going to get anywhere fast with them, she at least had to find Zeno.

"I need to get Zeno." Amane turned away from them, ready to sprint in the other direction, but she stopped when she saw Zeno standing in front of her.

"Sir! Chrollo is-"

"A good for nothing son of a bitch, yes." Zeno interrupted her. "You three." Zeno's voice silenced the butlers, and they moved almost instinctively to the side.

Zeno stepped forward, ready to enter the gym, but he stopped short of the doors to give the butlers a sideways glance. "Your foolishness has brought tragedy into your life. Your friend is still half-buried in the garden like an unwanted outcast. Go get him. Give him the dignity of a proper burial."

At his words the three of them hurried off. Amane stood there in the hallway with Zeno.

"Sir, before you go in-"

"Gotoh told me about Illumi."

There was a small moment of silence. They air was dry and fragile, and Amane felt shame in her stomach grow. She dropped to the floor in a deep bow. "Forgive me sir!"

"What must I forgive you for?"

"It's my fault! Chrollo must have had something to do with this and now- now Illumi is-"

"Is that what you're worried about, child?"

Amane dared not look up from the ground.

Zeno sighed. "If this is indeed Chrollo's doing, it is entirely on his head. And if that is the case, his head I will have. But first, I have to break my son's heart."

"Sir, you don't have to-"

"It should be me that tells him about Illumi."

Amane nodded.

Zeno stepped into the gym without another word.

…...

Chrollo ran through the Zoldyck manor, ready to make his escape. He knew that even if he did find Alluka, he wouldn't be able to approach. He still had no idea how powerful she was or what the payoff was like. It might not be a gamble he wanted to make if he had to wage his own life. He ran into Dr. Ito's office.

Chrollo figured she probably hadn't heard any news regarding Sasha yet, and hoped she could help her. He opened the door only to see her body on the floor with a chopstick imbedded deep within her skull.

"Dammit." Chrollo cursed. "Who the hell keeps killing all the butlers?" Chrollo heard a quiet breathing nearby. He turned the corner to see a sleeping Prytania, laying on a table in the infirmary hooked up to an IV drip and a heartrate monitor. Chrollo considered taking a minute to kill her. It would be easy and quick, all he needed to do was put a pillow over her head and be done.

Just as he thought this, he could hear someone else in the room moving about. He caught a glimpse of Kikyo through one of the metal instrument trays in the office. He quietly backed out of the room without making a sound and headed out of the mansion. He needed to get off the mountain and quick, he knew the butlers he had gathered to pledge loyalty to him wouldn't be so loyal once they all thought he had killed Sasha. His only option was to leave as quickly as possible.

…...

Gotoh had looked and looked and still hadn't found Kikyo. He'd been looking for what seemed like hours. It was already sundown, and the estate glowed a beautiful orange. Gotoh had walked outside the mansion, deciding to take a break. He spotted Kikyo sitting down on a small bench near a fountain, underneath a large tree smoking a cigarette. As he approached, Kikyo turned and smiled at him. Her hair was down and blew in the gentle breeze.

Gotoh wanted nothing more than to soak in how she looked like, right then and there. The last moment she'd ever have with her hopes and dreams for her firstborn son.

"Gotoh? Why the long face?" Her voice was cheerful. Everything about her in this moment was so beautiful.

But it had to end.

"Kikyo..." Gotoh's voice seemed tired and worn. Kikyo's expression turned to concern.

"What's wrong? Has Chrollo been caught? I was just about to go help look for him but I did a surgery on Prytania to remove a bone shard, and let me tell you I do not miss doing that one bit."

Gotoh sighed. "I have something to tell you."

Kikyo frowned. "What is it? What's wrong?"

Gotoh closed the distance between them, and sat down with Kikyo, placing his hand on hers and holding it. He looked over the estate. He could see the garden from where they sat, and the mountainside forest they overlooked. The mansion was behind them, and the butler's quarters were to their right. Gotoh sighed a heavy breath.

"Kikyo..." Gotoh squeezed her hand, partly for her, partly for him. "We got a call from the airship line that Illumi was flying."

Kikyo stared in silence at her head butler. Wind rolled through the trees, moving the leaves to touch each other just enough to make a soft rustling sound around them.

"The airship went down. Illumi is dead." The breeze slowed and went silent, and the trees themselves seemed to hold their breath.

Kikyo pulled her hand away from Gotoh. "You're lying to me."

"Would I ever lie to you?" Gotoh looked at Kikyo sincerely, and the beam in her visor seemed to move side to side, looking for any fault in Gotoh's integrity.

"No," Kikyo said, voice breaking. "That's- that's not possible."

"Kikyo," Gotoh reached his arm to place it around Kikyo, but she shoved it away.

"No! That's not true!" Kikyo felt like her heart had somehow dropped into her stomach as her throat threatened to choke her out.

Gotoh forcefully grabbed Kikyo and held her to his chest. "I'm so sorry, Kikyo."

"No!" Kikyo punched Gotoh a few times, but slowly the strength in her arms dissipated. She couldn't tell if she was screaming or crying, or both. She held on to Gotoh tightly and curled herself into a ball against him.

...

Hisoka watched as Illumi changed his appearance using his needles. His shoulders shrank, his face became softer, and his hair curled beautifully. He kept his hair black, but he now looked more unassuming, and most importantly, not like himself.

"I never get tired of seeing you change. It must be painful."

"I have a high pain tolerance."

"I know you do." Hisoka wiggled his eyebrows. The sun had already set and it was dark out.

Illumi sighed. "By now the search parties would have declared everything a total loss."

Hisoka nodded. "Yeah. That airship turned into a barbecue."

"My mother will think I am dead." Illumi looked at his hands. They were slender now, not too unlike his own, but different nonetheless.

"It's better this way. You won't have to worry about them finding you now."

Illumi nodded. With his guise, he walked into a men's clothing store and purchased a crop top and a pair of leggings for Hisoka. He had to estimate Hisoka's size, simply because he was wider than Illumi was, and had a more curvaceous rear. Hisoka waited in a nearby tree, covering himself with parts of the parachute.

Illumi returned with Hisoka's change of clothes, and Hisoka sprung out of the tree and hung upside down, using bungee gum to hold him.

"Did you get the stuff?" Hisoka smiled.

Illumi handed Hisoka a plastic bag with his new clothes in it. Hisoka took it in his hand and snapped back in the tree's branches with a quick transmutation of his bungee gum. Leaves fell around Illumi as Hisoka changed.

"Wow these are a perfect fit, Illumi. You got it so great!"

"Really?"

Hisoka jumped down from the tree. "Yes. But there's one problem."

Illumi looked at Hisoka. The crop top and leggings were a deep emerald color, and Illumi thought Hisoka looked great. "What is it?"

"Green is so _not_ my color."

"What? Why?"

"My red hair plus green makes me look like an elf. Can you get me something else? I can't go to Heaven's Arena looking like this."

Illumi scoffed. "At least you're covered now. You can get your own damn clothes."

Hisoka smiled. "I have an idea! Come shop with me. We can shop together for matching clothes."

"Wait. How did you hold on to your hunter's badge and your credit card all this time?"

"Same way I held you to me."

"Bungee gum?"

"It does have the properties of both rubber _and_ gum."

Illumi rolled his eyes but couldn't help smiling. Hisoka placed his arm around Illumi's waist as they walked together towards a shopping center.

…...

Chrollo ran down the path leading off Kukuroo Mountain, replaying the events of the day in his head.

Prytania had Amane find Sasha's body in the rose bushes, claiming he had to be the one to kill him.

But he didn't. He didn't kill Sasha, and he never approached that boy to recruit him.

Then Dr. Ito was dead in her office, where Prytania was asleep having received some kind of medical treatment for her arm. Kikyo was also there.

"Prytania. That woman." Chrollo mumbled to himself. "She framed me, but how?" Chrollo thought back to the previous morning, when he saw Hisoka staring at Sasha in the kitchen as he chopped lettuce.

" _Hisoka_." Chrollo spat the name out like a bad word. It made sense. Hisoka probably killed Sasha before they left as insurance in case Chrollo tried anything. All Prytania had to do was 'discover' the body near a butler with faulty loyalty to Chrollo.

"That man is forever a thorn in my side." Chrollo said with a snarl, and then a laugh.

"Stop right there."

Chrollo snapped out of his thoughts after hearing a voice in front of him. He stopped and looked ahead to see the small butler he had met when he came to the mountain, Canary. She stood fiercely, ready to stop him with her cane in her hands.

"I knew you weren't a priest from the beginning."

"And yet you still let me in." Chrollo teased.

"A mistake I won't make again, and now I won't let you leave." Canary tightened her grip on her cane.

Chrollo smirked. "I don't have time for this, so I'll be killing you quickly."

Canary smirked back. "You won't be killing anyone else today."

As soon as she had spoken, Canary sensed a blow coming her way. She could see a flash of metal in her view. A knife.

She barely had time to move before Chrollo sent another attack her way. He was fast, almost too fast to see. His abilities were probably on par with the Zoldycks, and Canary knew then that there was no way she'd win.

But at the very least, she could buy time. The longer she fought with him, the longer he was stuck on the mountain and the greater chance the Zoldycks had to catch him.

"Give it up, Canary. You're not going to win." Chrollo kept his attacks coming one right after another, and Canary tried to keep distance between them, but he was too fast. The knife grazed her arm, then her face. She backed away with each move, and Chrollo approached until she found herself backed into a tree. Chrollo smirked, thinking he had Canary pinned. She ducked and turned away just as Chrollo landed a blow on the tree, stabbing it deep into the hard flesh of the tree violently. Canary almost thought to be impressed, but her mind was focused more on getting away from Chrollo and surviving. There was no way she'd be able to counter attack without getting wiped out, so she had to stick to dodging.

But Chrollo had figured her out already. Leaving the knife in the tree, he bolted away from her down the mountain. She moved reflexively to chase after him, throwing her cane at him like a spear, but moved to the other side of the path, avoiding getting impaled.

She continued after him, but with a sudden flash, he was gone. Canary felt a punch on her side, followed by a blow to her head. As she blacked out, she saw Chrollo standing over her, watching as she fell to the ground and lost consciousness.

…...

Prytania opened her eyes. She was alone in the room, and everything felt heavy. She sighed, looking around and seeing Dr. Ito's body still on the floor. It was paler now, and her skin seemed dry and stiff. The blood on the floor was dark, and she could see where it had shrunk from drying. It had been several hours already and no one, mainly Kikyo, hadn't thought to move her. Prytania noticed a clock in the room.

"Seven thirty..." She lay there, wondering how the events she set into motion played out.

She remembered the conversation with Hisoka over the phone that morning.

" _You killed a butler?"_

" _He's buried in the garden underneath the yellow rose bushes. Do what you will with that information."_

 _"Why the hell do you people always resort to murder?"_

 _"Hey, now. You're not exactly innocent either."_

 _"I'm not crazy like you Hisoka!"_

 _"If that helps you sleep at night, whatever. Oh, one more thing. Have fun with Chrollo for me."_

 _"What?"_

 _"Heh. Never mind."_

 _"Bye, Hisoka."_

 _"Oh wait, before you go."_

 _"What?"_

 _"Sometime today, maybe tomorrow depending on how quickly news travels... you'll get a little gift from us."_

 _"What do you mean?"_

 _"You'll know what it is when you get it. Just consider it a thank you for all that you've done for me and Illumi."_

 _"A thank you? Should I be worried?"_

 _"No. You'll be fine."_

 _"See you when you get back."_

 _"…Bye."_

Prytania wondered what Hisoka meant by a thank you gift. She put it out of her mind and rested for a moment. She looked at her arm, which was wrapped up in a cast and held in a swing.

She could see silver hair approach her bedside, and she almost gasped, having not heard Silva come in. She studied his face, and saw that his eyes were puffy and his face sunken in.

"Prytania." Silva's voice was dry.

"Sir."

"Your contract has been terminated."

Prytania blinked, not sure if she heard him right. "What? Why?"

Silva looked down at Prytania. "Illumi is dead."

Prytania searched Silva's face again like he had just told her something ridiculous.

Silva spoke again, "His airship exploded this morning. There were no survivors."

Prytania swallowed, processing the words. "He's... Illumi's dead?"

"I'm sorry but that means you are no longer of any use to us, and with all that's happened today, my family doesn't need any outsiders living in our manor. You will be paid justly, and we do hope you come to his funeral once we have the details sorted, but we need you to leave.

Prytania nodded. "I understand. Thank you."

"I'll have one of the butlers gather your things, since your arm is broken. Please contact someone to pick you up at the base of the mountain by morning."

Prytania nodded, and Silva accepted her acknowledgement. He turned to leave but stopped when he saw the body of Dr. Ito.

"How did this one die?"

"She tried to attack Kikyo."

"Got it. I'll have someone come by and clean that up."

Prytania watched as Silva left, and she lay on the bed and smiled.

"That son of a bitch." She placed her left hand on her forehead in disbelief. "I get to leave. I actually get to leave." A tear fell from her eyes as she laughed.

…...

Tsubone had three graves to dig. One for Sasha, one for Dr. Ito, the traitor, and one for Illumi.

They hadn't received Illumi's body, but Tsubone figured they needed to be ready for when he came home.

Sasha's grave was the first she had dug, in the butler cemetery they had on the estate. Some of the other butlers had worked on making a casket for him. It was humble, made from wood they had stored in the Butler's quarters, but it was a proper casket nonetheless.

A casket was also made for Dr. Ito, but Tsubone dug her grave outside of the cemetery, in the forest away from where anyone would happen upon it. A traitor's grave – to never be visited. When everything was done, and the bodies laid in their respective graves, the butlers gathered at the cemetery. The bustle of the day had worn down once Canary was found unconscious on the path that led to the gates. Everyone accepted that Chrollo had escaped, and they decided there were more pressing matters than going after him.

Gotoh and Tsubone led a brief service for Sasha, as well as addressed Illumi's death to the butlers.

After everything that had happened, no one knew exactly how many butlers had pledged loyalty to Chrollo, but as the Zoldyck family mourned the loss of Illumi, Gotoh issued a pardon for the butlers. None of them, save Dr. Ito, had actually attacked the family with their own hands. The butlers let their traitorous thoughts lay with the doctor, in the hidden grave, and repledged their undying loyalty to the Zoldyck family.

…...

Chrollo left the gates of the Zoldyck mansion and headed through the town at the base of the mountain. There were hotels and tourist centers everywhere, the night life springing forth to bring a gentle orange glow throughout the city. Chrollo wandered through the streets until he found a working payphone. Luckily, he had managed to grab a handful of coins from Canary before making his escape. Not exactly the same world-class loot he was used to, but at least he could make a phone call.

….

"You've reached the rejection hotline! The person who gave you this number-"

"Shalnark, it's me. Chrollo."

"Oh, hi mom!"

Chrollo paused. "…Kalluto is in the room, isn't he?"

"Yeah, things haven't been that great. How are you, _mom?"_

"Shal, if he's there you need to leave the room and talk to me."

"No need to be upset, mom. I know I need to call you more often..."

Chrollo rolled his eyes as he listened to the sound of Shalnark getting up and stepping outside a room.

Shalnark sighed into his cell. "So, I heard you killed someone."

"I need to skip town."

"Ah, so you _did_ kill Illumi."

"What? _Illumi?_ I didn't even know he was dead."

"Tell that to Kalluto. He thinks you had something to do with it."

"Wait are you sure Illumi is dead?"

"As sure as I am gay."

"Wait, you're gay?"

"...Maybe, maybe not."

"…Whatever. Where are you all headed right now?"

"Meteor city. It might take us a few days, maybe a week. There's not exactly any non-stop airships to a place not a lot of people believe exists."

"Right. I'm in Padokea so it might take me longer to reach you. Wait for me in Meteor City, but don't tell Kalluto that I'm coming."

"Got it. See you then."

"Bye."

Chrollo hung up the phone and walked by a small food vendor, where people gathered around a news outlet. Chrollo saw what looked like reports of an airship explosion.

He crept in closer, listening into the newscast.

" _Over two hundred people died this morning in what is now being called as the deadliest airship crash ever. Airship Z143 was headed to Heaven's Arena Metropolis from Padokea when it exploded above the Mimbo Republic. Emergency services are still working on figuring out what caused the crash. We'll have more on the story as it continues."_

Chrollo snorted and whispered to himself. "If you're really dead, Hisoka, I won't forgive you."

… _..._

The next morning, Prytania stood in the Zoldyck's Office as Silva signed a check. She studied the man's face as he gathered several documents. His eyes had deep purple bags underneath as if he hadn't slept. She was surprise to see him at all this morning. Mike, Silva's giant hound, laid behind Silva contently with his head nuzzled against him as if trying to comfort him.

Prytania's heart ached for the man who believed he had just lost his son, but even more than her heart ached, she desperately longed to be free of that mansion.

Silva placed the check and other documents in a large envelope and handed it to her, and she took it awkwardly with her left hand, which she was still getting used to using.

"Not to be rude, but I'm glad you're leaving," said Silva with a sigh.

"No worries. I understand this is a difficult time for everyone."

"Forgive my wife for not wanting to see you off. She's very upset."

"I would imagine so."

"Amane will escort you out." Prytania nodded and left the room quietly. As the door closed behind her, she peered inside to get one last look at the head of the Zoldyck family. He had placed his head on his Mike's fur. Prytania wasn't sure whether to cry or to sleep. Either way, she pitied him.

"All set?" Amane, who had been waiting outside the door for Prytania, seemed to force a smile. She had bags under her eyes, too. It seemed to be a common feature among everyone this morning.

Prytania nodded, and Amane led the way.

Prytania walked through the halls of the Zoldyck estate. Before, when she walked through the manor, it was her prison. Now, it was just a building. She thought for a moment that maybe she'd miss the tea room overlooking the gardens but she decided there were too many secrets here for her to ever miss this place.

She was getting to leave.

This must be the present Hisoka meant. As everyone mourned around her, she had a feeling that Illumi and Hisoka were still very much alive, but she didn't dare say anything.

…...

As she and Amane walked down the mountain, they greeted Canary. She had a broken rib and a swollen eye, but she was still at her post nonetheless.

"Canary, I hope you get better soon." Prytania spoke kindly.

"I heard you got your bone crushed trying to protect Amane." Canary looked to the other Amane, who nodded quickly. Canary looked back to Prytania. "I hope to see you again. You're alright."

"That's very kind of you. Silva invited me back for Illumi's funeral. Maybe I'll see you then."

Canary nodded with a half-smile before letting them through. There was something depressed about the fact that the next time she would see everyone would be at Illumi's funeral. She didn't even know for sure if he and Hisoka were still alive, but she knew at some level she was still lying to everyone there.

They continued down the hill together, quietly.

"You should probably have a real doctor look at your arm."

"Yeah, although I trust Kikyo's ability, I'll need to go see a doctor to make sure I'm healing properly."

Amane nodded and kept walking. Prytania took a deep breath.

"You know, Amane, Kikyo does know your name, and the names of all the other butlers..."

"Yeah. I heard her say everyone's names yesterday. But that just means all this time she didn't use our names on purpose. I'm not sure if that's worse."

Prytania sighed.

Amane looked at her. "Don't worry. I won't try to join a mutinous line of thinking any time soon. Kikyo cares about the Zoldyck estate, and we butlers are part of the Zoldyck estate. That's not the best arrangement, but who knows, maybe she'll change."

Prytania looked at the girl in front of her. "She probably won't change."

"Whatever the case, they've forgiven anyone else who might have pledged to Chrollo as long as they pledge loyalty to them. I figure it's because there's no way to tell how many of us he recruited for sure. Anyone except myself, Dr. Ito, and a handful of others can simply claim they were never a part of it."

"What's going to happen to you, Amane?"

"For now, nothing. We'll see how things play out in the future."

Prytania sniffed. They had reached the bottom of the mountain, and the gates of testing stood before them.

Amane approached the gates and strained to get them open. Prytania was almost surprised at Amane's strength. "I wish you the best."

"You, too." Prytania walked out the gate and waved.

Amane could see a car with tinted windows waiting for Prytania. Amane let the gates close as the blonde woman walked towards the car, ready to leave the Zoldycks behind. The young butler saw a glimpse of her smiling back at Amane before the gate closed completely.

The young girl placed her hands in front of her in a prayer and shut her eyes. "May she have a good life!"

She opened her eyes and sighed, ready to face the mountain and the estate again. Just as she turned to heading back up the mountain, she heard a loud noise, something like a bang.

"A... gunshot?" Amane's eyes grew wide. The gunshot came from outside the gate. Amane quickly moved to push the gate open once more. She was strong, but she had never had to open the gate twice in a row. She could hear the sound of a trunk slam, then a door, then the car start.

She opened the gates just in time to see the car drive away.

"Prytania!" Amane screamed, but the car was driving away too quickly. "No!" Amane yelled, unable to hold the gates open for herself any longer, she let them close. She was inside the gates, tears of frustration flowing freely.

"No! No! No!" Amane punched the gates that kept her inside and cried.

…...

Chapter 20, Fin.

…...

Note:

This chapter ended up being kind of long but I don't care I love it.

Tell me what you think! Pretty please!

I shoot reviews into my bloodstream to keep me alive.

But like for real though hit me up with the reviews.


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